What did the compliemantry peanuts say to the man? "Nice tie."

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Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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why did the farmer cry after a phone call? he just found out his wife just died of lung cancer

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your mom is so black that it can be assumed she is of african descent

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An overweight man is at a gym. he is trying to lose weight because he feels uncomfortable with his size.

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How many Jews can you fit in a one-person car? --One in the drivers seat, 30 million in the ashtray

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whats the difference between justin beiber and a gay guy? both guys and girls like gay guys

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What is the difference between a black man and a white man? The pigment in their skin.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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a. why? b. because

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why did the man throw his clock out of he window? he was mentally insane.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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your mamas so fat all she gets for christmas and her birthday is girdles!

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are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

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Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting, he is very fond of animals and would never want to shoot them.

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Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

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What's after 9/11? 9/12

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Your mom is so fat, that last night after reading and edition of Cosmo, she skipped dinner and cried herself to sleep due to her inability to live up to such an unrealistic feminine stereotype.

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Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

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good looking women

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Michael Jackson and Barack Obama talked to each other about oreos

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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