Why did the chicken cross the road? He was depressed for a long time and decided to end his life by getting hit by a car.

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whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

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How can you tell if a blonde has been using your computer? Ask her.

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Why did the man cross the road? His mother had recently passed away after a 12 year battle with lung cancer and is visiting her tombstone.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

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Tony Blair, Micheal Jordan, Fabrice Muamba, Aunty Josephine, Nick Clegg, David Cameron, and myself all go out for drinks.

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whats brown and sticky? a four week dead uunborn african child...

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

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Knock knock. Whose there? Not my house so not my problem. Frankly, I don't give a shit.

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A duck walks passed a lemonade stand.

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Jake. Walsh.

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Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

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How did the mouse die It was eaten by a cat How did the cat die It jumped into the bathtub and drowned

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Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

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Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

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Bob loves Anne. Anne loves Bob. No one cares.

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What's 9+10? 19

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How many fish fingers does it take to change a lightbulb? Five.

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WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

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What's Blue And Fat? A Brick. I like to lie a lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops