Why did Johnny lose the race he got jawed by a pack of chimpanzees

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When's the worst time to use skin moisturizer? When you're a burn victim.

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I have an excuse why one leg and one arm ar shorter than the ather two. I was born sideways and pulled out by an arm and a leg, trust me im not stupid or gay... ASSSSSSSSSSSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..........................That was my turrets kickin in and i have dislexia if i didnt spell turrets right

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What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

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So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

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An owl and a squirrel were sitting on a tree branch. An acorn fell on the squirrel's head and surprised, the owl moved its head 3.276 degrees to the right. The squirrel apologized for the inconvenience, but the owl would not listen, so flew off to buy a ferry to help children with terminal illnesses get to school.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You know you really should have a safer way of finding out who is really on the other side. Now a days it's just not safe to ask, "who's there". I mean it could have been, Milkman, Plummer, or worst a Land Shark!

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Whats worst then finding drugs under you brothers bed finding your dead cat under his bed whats worst then finding your dead cat under your brothers bed finding your dead Gran whats even worst then that the Holocaust

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

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What's black and has ne education? A tire.

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Want to hear an orphan joke? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents

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What's brown, black, and red all over? The burning cross on the lawn of a respectable African-American family.

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AIDS is not a lifestyle it's a choice - and you chose wrong.

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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knock knock who's there me i kill you

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A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

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What do you get with two banana peels? Compost.

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Two birds were sitting on a perch, one turned and said to the other, "Do you smell fish?"

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

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A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

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Why did the moogle cross the road? Kupo kupo kupopo!

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What did the man with sores on his tounge get for a birthday present? He recieved a very nice pair of trousers which he wore to work from time to time

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I hope you shut the others down before you called me by my name, otherwise this will convo will get fairly short.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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