So there we were, climbing Mount Kjerag and we take a break. So I decided to tell you a joke. "Isn't this nice, just hanging around? See it's funny because we're suspended over 1000 metres in the air by our harnesses, except that you're not because I cut yours and now you're falling and you're gonna die." But I had done all that before I told you the joke so you didn't hear me and now I'll have to cut my harness and try to catch up to you so I can repeat myself. Great job, ya prick.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

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Women's rights

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Why don't traffic lights go swimming? Because they aren't sentient or animate, and therefore can't decide to undertake such an activity. Even if they were sentient, they wouldn't enjoy swimming as the water would damage their electrical works.

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A white guy, spanish guy, and a black guy jump off a roof. They were all killed on impact and their families will mourn their loss for years to come.

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Go away.

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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Q: Why did the Jew have to go to a concentration camp? A: Because he was Jewish

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "I'll take a drink."

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A Mexican and a black person both jump off a bridge, who hits the water first? Neither, as all matter falls at the same rate, regardless of weight, size, or ethnicity.

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Nice legs....What time do they open?

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what is more fun than shower time with adele. a mass gang bang with antonia

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yo mama so fat that the doctor asked for her weight not her phone number!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

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I just found out i have cancer.

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What do you call a magic MAAAAAAAAAAAN? A magic man

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Printing billions of counterfeit dollars...in ones.

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How did the teenage mother get her baby to stop crying? Multiple stab wounds to its throat

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Why is my grandpa always so grumpy? Because he has diabetes and life is very difficult for him.

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Why did the man pull out his chainsaw? To get rid of a tree in his front yard.

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A man had come into a bar. No wait, it was a horse. A man had come into a horse.

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A man walks into a pole and freezes to death.

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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