Why is Wednesday a bad day? Because at some point, Monday will come around again.

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Q: What did the duck say to the bartender? A: Nothing considering that ducks cannot speak

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

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Roses are red Violets are? blue Lets eat poo I know you want to

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What is worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

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did you know r kelly and jay z had a album together?

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What did Hellen Keller name her dog? Her parents named it Spot; Hellen Keller isn't able to speak due to her handicapped muteness.

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What is Worse than the holocaust?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate sex Especially with you

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If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

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A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

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A man is sitting at a bar. He stands up and goes over to these bikers playing pool. He then walks over to the bartender and says "I bet you three hundred dollars that I can pee in that bottle over there." The bartender looks at the bottle and sees there is a good five meters between the two. The bartender then agrees. The man takes out his penis and begins to pee. His pee stream goes everywhere on the bar, on the cash register, and espicially on the laughing bartender. It goes everywhere except inside the bottle. The man finishes and zips his pants. He then smiles at the bartender while handing him three hundred dollars. The bartender asks "why are you laughing you lost three hundred dollars?" Which the man replies "See those bikers by the pool table laughing?...I bet them five hundred dollars each that I could pee on your bar, on your cash register, and on your face and you would laugh and be happy." The bartender then reached under his bar and toke out his bat. He then continued to break the mans knees and then perceeded to pee on his bruised and battered face.

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How do black guys say hi to each other? Hi.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

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Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To return to its nest.

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A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

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So a priest, a rabbi, a blonde and a black person walk into a bar. The Bar Tender says, "Is this some kind of joke"

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yo mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the size of the door...

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A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because 7 is black.

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why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

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What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

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You know what's better than a taco? A better taco.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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