what's worse than pie? alot of things.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? No Neither did she

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When life gives you lemons, you throw them at your friends. If they throw them back, duck

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what do you get when you cross do you get when you cross a banana and a monkey? one happy monkey

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Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem. _._._

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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Q. What happened first The Tree or The Apple. A. Johny Appleseed.

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Why does manure smell like poop? Because it is poop.

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An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

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What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

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drew edminstin is a rat

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Bob (laughing): Jared fell off of a cliff Jim: What's so funny about that? Bob: Nothing. I'm laughing at the girl that just fell out of a tree into a giant tub of peanut butter!!!

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What's worse than a bee sting? Getting shot in the head

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Why did osama bin laden cross the road? To commit suicide

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knock. knock. whos there? ur mom now put ur pants back on

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Shit, I can't think of anything to write. That does not mean I'm black

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Why did the dinosaurs die out? Because you touch yourself at night.

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What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

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why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Why did the fat guy sit on another guy? They were in a wrestling match.

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When life throws you lemons, your first instinct is to make lemonade. Due to your severe lemon allergy, however, you will die within several minutes and therefore have no viable method of creating said lemonade. You die horribly and your death sparks a movement against the biological warfare of life.

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What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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