Q. Why couldn't the blind black guy read. A. He's Dead

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JEWS

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A bird flew into a cave and Batman said, "GET OOOUUUTTT!"

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A guy in a truck delivering furniture runs over a frog. Concerned for the frog, he pulls over and runs back to the frog and asks "Are you ok?" The frog replies "Yeah, you want to buy a cupboard?"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" A few people laugh, but the horse, incapable of speech, does not. He is unfamiliar with this location and begins to panic. In his panic his leg is broken. He is put down shorty thereafter.

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a dumb blond walks into a hair salon and gets her hair died brown... she is now a dumb brunette

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What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "That's kind of ambiguous..."

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing, she had no arms. Knock Knock Who’s there? Not Sarah.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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What did Justin Bieber say when he felt funny? Wheres my tampon

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Jimmy went to a bar, to see a stand up comedian, he heard the standup comedian tell a funny joke, so after the show, he went home and told his wife the joke and after that he said, i made that up, im funny arent i, the wife seemed shifty, so she googled the joke and found the stand up comedians joke, giggled and then proceeded to continue back angrily to Jimmy, because he just did the wrong thing, she slapped Jimmy in the face, divorced Jimmy and killed his 3 children because Jimmy plagurised, and plagurism is illegal, and now Jimmy has no children, and a red mark on his cheek and knows he did the wrong thing don't smoke kids

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What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

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Two whales are in a bar. One says, "whoaohaoahwoahwahoh" The other says, "Go home, Frank. You're drunk."

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What's great about taking a shower with a twelve year old girl. Pulling her hair back and making her look like a six year old

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A man walked into a bar. He said "ow". Tragic.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

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What did the mexican get for his brthday? A potatoe

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What do you call a girl who got raped by ger dad? Casey Anthont

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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-What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew -The pizza doesn't experience many years of hardship and social belittlement at the hands of a dictator in need of a scapegoat to support radical ideas.

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Why did the man sit on the chair? Because he was tired of standing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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