Hi

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Q-What did the hobo get for Christmas? A-Pneumonia.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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Knock knock Who's there? Impatient Hellen Keller. Impatient Hellen Keller who? ...

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What did the Protoss player say when he lost to a Terran player? I concede defeat. You simply have a greater mastery over the game than I.

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You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks: "why that long face?" The horse, being a horse, thus not being able to comprehend the complexities of a conversation, says nothing and then shits on the floor.

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roses are red violets are blue you little stupid a*s b**ch i aint f***ing with you

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Q:What were Helen Keller's dying words? A: Speaking is difficult when you have no way of hearing others. Apart from that, just hours before you die, you become unaware of your surroundings, and have a harder time communicating. Both these problems merged together made it basically impossible for her to speak before death.

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A man and Sasquatch are walking down the shoreline on the eastern coast, the man looks back at the foot prints in the sand, he notices that during the hardest parts of his life, there were only one pair of footprints, while in his easiest moments, he sees two pairs of footprints; the man is disturbed about this and he asks Sasquatch this. "Sasquatch, Although you have always promised to be with me in my life, I see that when I needed you most, you were never there. Why is this Sasquatch?" Sasquatch replies, "HREAAHAHG?!"

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Worst joke ever

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Roses are red Pickles are green I leik ur legs and whats inbetween

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chuck norris

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What did the black man say to the watermelon? Watermelon.

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what is long on joe? Not his dick thats for sure.

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What did the blonde say to the man when he asked her what time it was? 6:34 pm

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A man goes to the doctor and is told, "you have cancer." He then spends his last days writing a bucket list, but losing his leg in a wood chipper before he could complete a single item on his list

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A jew go out of a bar

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they work hard at it

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Q: you know whats a good movie? A: twilight.

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"Hey baby, how much?" "$2.99 each or 2 for $5.00, Steve." "Thanks Baby, I'll take 2."

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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