A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

What did batman say to robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red OMFG MY LAWN IS ON FIRE !!!?

Q: Why was the blonde so dumb? A: Because she wasn't properly educated.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Doctor Harold Boo, I was your grandmother's primary caregiver, I'm here to inform you that she died of a massive heart attack.

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

whats a bike and rhymes with mike?

Christianity

Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

Yo mama is... a very nice person, and her cooking is exquisite.

Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

A man walks into a doctor's office, he pees in a cup and is diagnosed with diabetes.

how many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one................ standing on a pile of dead babies.

I remember this one time... I was sleeping... And all of a sudden... I woke up... Yeah.

What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

What did one direction do? Nothing, their music is written by someone else they don't use whatever talent they have and they sound I million dying kittens.

what do you call a man with a bullet hole in his leg? A man who needs t see a doctor.

What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

Your ancestors called. They want their glasses back!

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

Why was the jew so happy? He won the lottery which at the time was 3.40 dollars

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

How do you make a telemarketer scream? Set him on fire.

How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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