How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

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Doctor: Knock knock... Patient: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor... Patient: Interrupting doct-- Doctor: You have cancer.

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Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

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A blind 1st grader is doing math. He can't figure out a problem so he asks his mom to help, his mom then ask "Why don't you just count by your fingers?" the little boy then said "MOM! I'm blind I can't see!" his mom replys "then how do you see your homework?" the boys replys "I opened my eyes, now help me"

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Whats the most common use of a butt plug after school? In the sport of pole vaultIng, the butt plug is the rubber end of the pole that is designed to withstand the force of being planted in a steel box.

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Q: What dosent a Jew and a pizza have in commen? A: The pizza dosent scream when you put it in the oven.

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What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

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How many Jews can you fit in to a car? Well depending on the car 2-8

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What is the difference between ashes and a jew? A lot

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DUH DUH DUH DRAMATIC HAMSTER

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

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Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

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Why did the family go to Mexico? Because they were deported

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Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

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Hello penis

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What's Kanye West's main goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

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You're welcome. On to the next house.

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Your mama is so black, she contributes regularly to the NAACP and the United Negro College Fund. Her donations and volunteer work help greatly.

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What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

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why did the baby die because it was diagnosed with lukimia

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I went to the zoo the other day there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu. By Nathan Luque CARROTS!!!

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What's blue and smells like sky? Sky

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream...?? Because he got hit by a white van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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