I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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Theres 3 guys walking and the see a genie. He says hell grant 3 wishes. The first guy asked for sandals. The genie said"I can do that" and he got sandals. The second guy asked for rock hard abs.The genie said,"sure thing".When he looked down, he saw that he had rock hard abs. The third guy asked for a pair of pants."ok" Said the genie. And then he got a pair of pants.

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Why did the teenage boy touch himself at night? Because he was shot in the stomach by his drunken father and was trying in vain to stop the bleeding.

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What happened to the man who ate a piece of pizza after doing a lot of sit ups, while rubbing the belly of a fat man, and feeding his baby at the same time? He Lived

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Why did the car cross the road? Isn't that what cars do?

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Homosexualism is so gay man

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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A man walked into the bar and ordered a drink, drank it then stood up and left remembering that he once had a drinking problem and had overcome it.

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Why did the fish bite the house? Because he wanted to eat the house

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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Be careful not to say Betelgeuse 3 times, because if you say Betelgeuse 3 times, then Betellllwoow that was close.

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My mother in law fell down a wishing well, i was amazed, i never new they actually worked

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Roses Are Blue Violets Are Purple Black is Purple Im colorblind

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A Black Man walks into a bar...

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

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A seal walks into a club.

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What do you call a black man running really fast down a street? Active.

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why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

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Q: what do you call a muslim driving a plane? I don't know A: 9/11

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Why do black people love watermelon and fried chicken? Honestly who doesn't? Duh! Because most people do! Moral: Not so sure about the coolaid though...

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican and an African? A baby.

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Why don't people like this joke? It makes no sense.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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