Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black And so was six because they were written with black pen

knoc knock! who's there? poo on! poo on who? you!

The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

For New Years I want to spend more time with my... Video Games

Why did the Chicken cross the road? The light was red, which prompted the chicken to cross safely.

Brittney Spears

whats the difference between a joke and the holocaust? ...There both funny..Exept for the Holocaust.

A black man walks into a store. As he leaves, the detector goes off. It turns out the sales clerk had forgotten to take out one of the tags on his purchase. The sales clerk promptly took it off, and the man left to enjoy the rest of his day.

Knock knock. Who's there? Jahova's witnesses.

what did the bartender say to the customer? a. is it the first option b. is it the second option c. is it the third option.

What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? Getting life imprisonment after...

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

what is worse than bitting into your apple and finding a worm? 9/11

What did one Rhino say to the other? My, I'm sure glad we found this decadent watering-hole.

Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

Why do you stick a baby in a blender feet first? So you can see the expression on its face...

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a human profession, and the other is a type of fish.

Once their was an ugly barnacle. He was sooooo ugly that everyone died! The end. :D

How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

Batman vs Superman the movie spoilers: Batman and Superman argue over how to handle some alien invaders, Batman wants to kill em, Superman believes he can save em. In the end they work together and save everybody. Moral: I hope they change the script, ever noticed how every hero vs hero themed movie/cartoon, ends up with them allying at the end? If ya do not believe me, just wait for the movie to come out.

What do you call a cat that growls? A cat

What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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