A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third guy ducks.

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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69

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How do you get a mexican to do the yard work faster? Offer him a 5% bonus.

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Hey, Have you Seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he!

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Who taught Chuck Norris? -Chuck Norris

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Why did the cow cross the road? He was in the moooooooood.

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A woman walked out of the kitchen.

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Whatsup?! Your grandpas chance of dying.

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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If you play The Binding of Isaac backwards, it's about a boy who summons Satan in hell and ascends multiple floors and eventually revives him mom by sucking in tears. He eventually becomes less of a monster until going back to his home and living hapily with his mother, completely forgetting anything had ever happened.

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What happens when you mix breed a cat and a human?? .. you get arrested and get raped by your fellow prisoners DONT do it!

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

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What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

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What did Jay Z say to his long lost friends? Allow me to reintroduce myself, my names Jay - Z

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Two flatfishes swam in a bathtub.

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Why did the baby cry? Because he fell off a refrigerator.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?!, who's there?!!!, ya fucking asshole!!!, and quit knockin on my door!, my windows are fine!"

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: Because of Kevin Spacey's chilling performance.

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2 squirrels with 2 massive boners and 1 little boner.

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Why is a building called a building when it's already been built? My pinky is pink and my liver helps me live.

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Jim bean takes out a can of- Let me guess- No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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