How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

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What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

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baloney sandwich

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What did the Religious Education teacher teach on National Science Day? Religion, because that is the teacher's job.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Santa isn't real.

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Where did John go? Refrigerator

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Grass is green.

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Why was the Mexican smart? Because he was very well educated and went to college, and got a Ph.D

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There was a man with a job and kids. One day he came home from his job and went to sleep. He never woke up because it turns out he had a heart attack.

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Why did the boy stop singing? Because his lungs collapsed.

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So this guy's taking a hooker back to a hotel room, right? The woman turns out to be a federal agent investigating prostitution in inner-city inviornments, and the man is promptly arrested. He is now subject to a large fine and 90 days in a county jail.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

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9/11

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Why did the chiocken cross the road? There's no such thing as a chiocken.

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what do you call a black man with no arms or legs sitting on a porch? "sir" His life is hard enough with out being subject to social rudeness

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Q: What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? A: One baby nailed to ten trees.

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The biggest lie in the world . . . I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Roses are green,violets are blue,i'm high as ****,is that perfume or glue?

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roses are red violets are blue ur family is dead and u will die too

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What's black, dangerous and sits in a tree ? A crow, with a machine gun !

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Naturally us at the order of exile, the ones that learn and teach the ways of Nero do not exist. Soon neither will those that speak against us. - Azure Dragon

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Why did the elephant paint his toenails orange? Because he wanted to hide in the pumpkin patch

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Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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