What's the difference between Rob Schnieder and Jelly Beans? Someone besides Adam Sandler likes Jelly Beans.

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Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

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Miss Hoolie: Hello, PC Plum. What's the story in Balamory? PC Plum: I'm arresting you for the sexual molestation of twenty children.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

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how did the asian man get on the internet? by opening his internet browser just like everyone else

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your momma is so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes

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Q: who is the worst person to ever post "jokes" on anti-joke.com? A: ryan valee

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when i walk in the living room this is what i see... Luci's big eyes are stairing at me! (Luci is a dog) (Pita is a cat) I start a hissing and a scratchin and i ain't affrid to bite her, bite her, bite her, I"M PITA AND I KNOW IT!!!

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Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

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Why do girls wear perfume? Because they smell and they're ugly

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Obama

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Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

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On a scale of Casey Anthony to Jerry Sandusky how much do you like kids?

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Sure, if my waifu aproves, hell, the more the hornier. CONDOMS? ARE YOU INSANE? CONDOMS ARE FOR PUSSIES... ..:WHIIIIIICH sorta makes sense so okay, my for a moment I thought you where not gonna go trough with this... Nah just kidding, I already got you, now if you want to break free I am gonna be like "MEH!" So, uh, you shaven or not? Please dont be "trimmed", sometimes it just looks like a pussy with a mustachio, thats bullshit.

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How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

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Me and my wife set and watch the eleven o'clock news every night. My wife always thinks that she has the different disease that is mentioned each day. One night she was practically in tears telling me that she had the disease that was talked about that night. I looked at her and said "honey, there is no way that you have testicular cancer. You don't even have testiculars." The End

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Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

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How many kids with A.D.D. does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride?

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lebron

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I got pissed off at my little brother... So I threw him out of the window.

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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three jews walk into a bar. then a bear mauls them.

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Q: a man in a camry runs over his wife. who's fault is it? A: toyota and their breaks.

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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