how did the man jump over the mountain? it was a small mountain and he had a trampoline

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Why was the woman poor at driving? Because she had not yet passed her driving test.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? This year I'm going to win the golden brief case!

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Q: what weighs 6 ounces sits in a tree and is very deadly? A: a sparrow with a machine gun

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

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Why did Ian die Because I shot him with a gun

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a guy who can fly walks up a hill and jumps off a cliff. his flying power fails him and he dies on impact

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? Little old lady who got hit by a bus.

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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Hi

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What has a beard and bombed the World Trade Center? Oama Bin Ladin. No, but seriously he's a terrorist.

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk. What did u think he'd do, have coke-a-cola? Dumbass.

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If at first you dont succeed..... your not chuck norriss

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What looks like a flower, smells like a flower, and feels like a flower, but isn't a flower? Just kidding it's a flower

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with my brother anymore? Because he's dead.

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What did the black man say to the watermelon? Watermelon.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

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Why wasn't the black guy allowed into the bar? Because the bar was closed.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? Getting shot in the gut What's worse than that? Getting raped in the hole made by the bullet

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There was once a family of termites. There was a Papa termite, a Mama termite, and a baby termite, called Motor. One day they reached a big fat log, and they decided they'd bore through. So first went Papa. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out came Papa! Next came Mama. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out came Mama! Last came Motor. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out bored Motor!

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why is this joke funny because your laughing

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How do you kill a fox? With a gun. How do you kill a deer? With a gun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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