A wild bear walks into a bar, grabs a drink and looks at the man next to it. The man then wakes up from a dream and gets ready for work.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's black and has the texture of tar? Molasses

thumb_up thumb_down +20

*Ring* *Ring* Bartender : Hello? Stranger:Is Mike Hunt their? Bartender: Mike Hunt! Is Mike Hunt here?! Mike Hunt: Oh thank god! I've been anticipating this phone call for a while now! I've been stranded here for hours and my wife's been killed and the killer is still out there!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is worse then North Korea trying to blow up everybody? Peter Griffin twerking.

thumb_up thumb_down

Did you know Helen Keller has a pool? no oh well she does.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the radiator say to the carpet? Nothing, a radiator is an inanimate object, and therefore is unable to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What do you call an elephant and a rhino mixed? Ahellifiknow.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why is 5 afraid of 6? it isnt

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Two computers walk into a bar I forget the rest

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's worst that the Holocaust? Another one.

thumb_up thumb_down

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

thumb_up thumb_down

pretend its saturday.... what is the square root of 9? who cares? everyone knows that you don't do math on saturday.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Four guys walk into a bar. They buy their drinks and stay for a couple of hours. After they are done they get a cab ride home. It was a lovely night.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the lemon say to the turtle? If you think the lemon said anything, something is wrong with you.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why didn't the girl make it to the other side of the road? A police officer stoped her because she was j-walking.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the 5 year-old go to the hospital? He had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms? Because they weren't invented when he was alive.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? " I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q. what is the difference between a black man and a park bench A. a parkbench can support a family A black man cannot

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Happy Monday!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What are the black specks in birdshit called? That's birdshit too.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what do you call something that dosint exist? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops