A car walked into a bar... wait no it didn't it has wheels.

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What do you call a black man standing on top of a church? "Holy-Shit."

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Why don't gingerbread cookies have souls? Cookies don't have souls.

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The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

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Why did the man smoke pot in the roller coaster? Because he was dyslexic and read the sign wrong and thought it read "You must be high to go on this ride."

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Why do elephants have such big ears? So they can hear really well.

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Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a dog, Meow.

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Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

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Is it a bird, Is it a plane, I don't know what it is but it's heading straight for the World Trade Centre

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? Well I would open the freezer.

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Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

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SCENE: A prirate walks into a bar with the wheel of the ship attached to his pants. BARTENDER: Doesn't that hurt? PIRATE: Aye! It drives me nuts.

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Wanna hear a joke......... your moms face !!

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Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning.

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Q: How do get a person to leave you alone ? A: Suck out his eye-balls stuff them in your ears to muffle the sound of his screaming as you head-butt him into a fine paste. Then proceed to spread or squeeze sed paste on to delicious food substance and eat sed delicious food substance. Then carry on with the rest of your day like nothing happened. (P.S. Just ignore any letters about court cases or arrests)

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What kind of drug did the cops catch the alligator with? None. They were going to use a tranquiliser dart, but SPCA intervened and simply held the alligator's mouth shut while they loaded it into a secure cage.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

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What is 2 + 2? 3 LOL

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What's worse than Hitler killing six million Jews? All of the Jews. --ZeNaziGermanDoctior

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Q: Why wouldn't the other kids play with Timmy at recess? A: Because he was a burn victim and had no face.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Womens rights.

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A black guy and a white guy are in a car. What is going to happen? They will arrive at their destination.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask him to lower the volume a bit and maybe also play a quieter tune.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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