Why did the Muslim suicide bomber commit suicide? He was nervous and didn't think he could hijack a plane.

Two chinese friends are chatting, and one says ????????? His friend says ??????? After that, the first one says ???????????, and you keep reading this like if you understood chinese.

What's worse than 9/11? a dipped glass of milk

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

Lillie: tell me three adjectives that would describe yourself. Ellie: pretty, smart, and funny. Lillie: if I were to analyze you...I would say you are pretty, smart, and funny.

what do you call a gay ginger boy ? Ronan.

Why couldn't the man read? Because he was illiterate

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy became cold easily.

why did my girlfriend get pregnet? i didn's use a condom, and my semen entered her long muscular tube, also known as a vagina.

Why did the bird fall. Its tree got cut down.

A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come home from camp.

Where does the Queen keep her armies? In various military bases across the country.

How many dead babies can you fit in my car? None, I don't allow anyone to put dead babies in my car.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? Little old lady who got hit by a bus.

What did the mexican firefighter name his kids? Jose and Pablo

why did Max cry??? chicken

would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

David: Hey dude, I'm so hungry! Jose: Yeah me too David: Wanna get some food? Jose: No, I lied.

a. why? b. because

What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

Why did the British person go to the dentist? He had a poor diet which led to him getting cavities

What did the blonde get for Christmas? A Brain

Steve Jobs is alive In our Hearts <3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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