once opon a time. never mind i'm just going to beat you kids.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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Why couldn't the Chinese man drive? Because he didn't have his driver's license yet.

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will you have for dinner? The duck says "quack".

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What do you call a college student who never studies? An irresponsible person

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And I hate Jewish people

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frost bite.

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Austin is gay. He goes to River Road. And is a sophomore.

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Lilys are from england violets from japan. I've got a knife now get in the van

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person 1. Did you here about the black guy who went to college? person 2.no person 1. either have i whats ironic is that they are both black

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knock knock who's there? Madeline McCann really? no

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What do you call a puppy with no limbs? It doesn't matter, he's never coming back.

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? I'm sleeping with your wife

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Why is Chuck Norris' beard so great? because he grooms it daily.

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Why did Windows crash ? F*ck Windows, that's why.

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Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

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what is the difference between two trees? it doesn't matter because motorcycles don't have doors

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What did my Grandmother get for Christmas? Alzheimer's.

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what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

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The man that loved birds so much that he played golf just to get a birdie.

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What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

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Adam Chebali goes to war and is quickly killed. The rest of the world rejoices as he can no longer post anti-jokes only he thinks are funny and brag about himself on anti-joke.com.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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