What did the burn victim get for Christmas? A book of matches

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a man walked into a bar, however the bar was in Pakistan so he got shot by terrorists

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? A blue waffle.

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What has a fiery tail and is mentally handicapped? Charetard.

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two jews walk into a bar and were served properly

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Knock knock Who's there? Batman Batman who? Because he was

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Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name is not Mark.

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Why did Santa's little helper feel depressed? Neurotransmitters essential for happiness, such as serotonin and norepinephrine, were in rather low supply in the poor elf's brain.

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wounds are red bruises are blue I've got five fingers the middle ones for you

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

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thats what she she. no really thats what she said

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A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

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What was the last thing the clown said to his wife before she died? Rebecca, just stay with me, the ambulance is almost here.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, You are reading jokes online, Go make some friends, or take up knitting because it has many benefits.

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Invention I totally meant invention! XD, now okay, you can have the top comment, ill even read it because I like ya a lot.

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What's red, hairy, and squishy? Helen Keller in a blender.

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Knock knock Who's there? A very long space I see what you did there

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dear GIRLS, roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in the zoo don't be mad i will be there too not in the cage but laughing at u .

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

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Why did the girl scream at old people? She had turrets. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

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why are black peroples noses so big ? because thats where God held them when he spray painted them

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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