I admit I don't know what the future holds, but one thing I know for sure is that... Lance Armstrong has only one ball.

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A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

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Boy: Hey, guess who likes you. Girl: Who? Boy: NOBODY!!!!!!!!

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What's funnier than New York City? ADAM STOCK! By Logan in South Dakota

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(Timmy has no arms or legs.) A:Knockknock! B:Who's there? ANot Timmy

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roses are red, violets are blue, I talk to myself, and so do it I.

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There once was the worlds most important people on an airplane. All of them. They were a Boy Scout with a hiking pack, World's Oldest person, World's Smartest person, a Scientist who had the cure to cancer, and the World's Richest man. The Pilot told them that the plane was running out of gas and they would have to bail. But there was a problem, two people were going to have to die. They were only two parachutes short. So the Scientist grabbed one and said, "I'm the only one with the cure to cancer I've got lives to save." And he bails. Then the World's oldest person jumps out with a parachute saying, "I Still Have A Life To Live!!!" Then the Richest person realizes there is two parachutes left. He says, "I have the most money so I have to go because I could save America from going bankrupt." Grabs a chute and jumps. Then, the world's smartest person just happens to be so selfish and bails with the last Parachute. So the Pilot and and the Boy Scout were left. The pilot was kind enough to let the Kid go because he still had he longest life to live. But the kid said no, we could both go. The pilot said no you go. The kid was still being stubborn. And said No, we could both go, The world's smartest person took my back pack, there is one chute left, we could share it. And so they both jumped and landed safely on the ground. And that was the end of the World's smartest man.

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Knock knock! Who's there? It's me, Allison. Oh, come in!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? They had a sale on dresses on the other side.

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Why did the Negro say no to the Aryan? It doesnt matter what he said! thats racist!

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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Y- You O- are L- such a O- Loser

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Cheese that isn't yours

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What did Steve say when his leg got chopped off? Nothing, he went into a state of shock before blacking out due to loss of blood. Later on, he died, and a week later, a funeral was held, in which nobody showed up, because nobody cared for Steve.

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Why do black people always say to the left to the left... because they don't have rights.

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hey

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

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How could problems have been avoided in the old west? Bigger towns

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Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

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Homosexualism is so gay man

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Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, suck my tip and call me Regi.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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