What is the funniest joke in the world? Written.

What do you call a black person driving a plane? A pilot, because you dont want to call him anything racist i mean he is driving you up 25,000 ft in the air and the last thing you want is for him to get mad and decide to do something rational, God, you racists.

What do you say to a cat with a helmet on? Silly cat, you rhyme with hat but you shouldn't wear one.

what did the judgmental teacher say to a challenged student? your stupid

Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a shovel? I don't have a sack of dead babies in my garage.

what goes woof ? A dog.

Hey I just met you and this is crazy, I am pregnant and that's yo baby !

Roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme but this one doesn't

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dumb jokes, now shut up.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

Why did Mary fall off the swing. She had no arms Knock knock Whis there Not Mary.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

if a man is alone in the forest, and there are no women around to hear him...........is he still wrong?

What happened when the football player couldn't get his Coke from the vending machine? He got angry.

What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

What is blue and flies across the room? A baby with a punctured lung.

Jesus can walko water Humans are 70% water I can walk on humans Therefore i am 70% Jesus

What is the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench is an inanimate object whereas a black man is a human being with rights.

What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

why did the chicken cross the road cause he was suicidal but a car just didnt happen to hit him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...