How do you spell Madeleine Mccann? I A N

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What do you call 4 black people at a kfc? A family sitting down for there evening meal

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what looks like a banana? a penis

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What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

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A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

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How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

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Why didn't the Hawaiian man know how to surf? He lives in Kansas

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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, I don't know what to do! One day I'm a wig wam, the other day I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a teepee again!" The doctor sighs and replies,"Sir, we've been over this. You have stage four periodic cancer."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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why did scooba steeve loose his flippers? because his head imploded after reaching an extremley high pressure point at the bottom of the ocean. unable to live, his memory was a bit less persistant.

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roses are reddish voilets are blueish if it weren't for christmas we'd all be jewish

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

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Andy Warhol said we will all be famous for fifteen minutes. My soccer coach molested me and the trial was televised, they obscured my face and voice because I was twelve at the time.

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why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

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full house

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what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

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I was going to write about anti-climaxes but then I didn't.

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So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

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A man walks into a bar and gets drink

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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