What do u call Lindsay Lohan fall from grace? Probably likely tragic and is also a very useful metaphor for The USA's projected path for global and economic superiority.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Ask me if im a tree! Are you a tree? No

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

WHY DID THE CHICKEN FART SO LOAD TO GET EVRYYBODY ATENTION

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why didn't the black man finish his lunch? He wasn't hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What is invisible, weighs 332 pounds, runs 67.3 mph, is green, and is made by Jews in China. Nothing, if something is invisible, then it cannot reflect green light, therefore it cannot be green.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: Holy do you get a nun pregnant? A: You have sexual intercourse with her, and have an orgasm inside her body. Also, in vitro fertilization is a viable, albeit expensive, alternative for couples who have difficulty conceiving by standard intercourse.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

My wife made me a sandwich

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Only in your math books can Carlos buy 14 cantaloupes without hus sanity being questioned.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A seal walks into a club... the seals freinds later inform him they are now at a bar the seal then walks into the bar... the seal was later beaten to death

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is cowboy say

thumb_up thumb_down -35

god sent down his only son, " his only son." so in gods eyes we are a bunch of girls.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the Asian father say to his son when he got a b? Good job son!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

You are the third derivative of the position function.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A black guy, a Jew and a Mexican walked into a bar...so I didn't....not because of their race but because I had already spent all of my money at the gay bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what's worse than being attacked by a giant ant? being attacked by two giant ants

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why didn't the Alzheimers patient put on her shoes? She didn't leave the elderly home that day, thus taking away the need to put on shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What goes up a smokestack instead of down? Murdered Jews, when they get cremated.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Agent 47.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops