How you know when dislextic

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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What do you call a child with a peg leg, and eye patch, and no hand? Names

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What do you call a horse standing alone in an empty field? Tesco's own Beef Lasagne.

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You shoot at the blonde. Causing her to fall, but I have a feeling she will be pretty mad!

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If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

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black guy graduating high school

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What do call a black piano player? A pianist.

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Question: How did the chicken get to the other side of the road? Answer: Too find his joint.

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Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

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A black woman sits down in the front of a bus.

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Whats worse than swinging a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

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What has one head, three eyes and seven legs? A cow with a tri-pod rammed up it's arse. The third eye is a result of a birth defect.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet But i have commitment issues So I'd rather just be friends at this point in our relationship.

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What's the difference between a Pile of Dead Babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamboghini in my garage

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-Will you follow the live coverage of 86th Acacemy Awards? -No. -Are you anti-semitic?

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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What's orange and can fly through walls? A Magic Orange.

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amy mcguire is soo amazing! i love her

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Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being hit by a plane.

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Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

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Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

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Q: What did the priest say to the rabbi? A: Our God is a wonderful, loving god; praise his name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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