What is the difference between a mexican and a bench? One is living, one is not.

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whats green and slimy? green slim

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Crowded elevator smell different to midget-Confucius say.

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my shift key is broken1

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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Well educated black man.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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A man sits down to dinner with his wife And she notifies him that their 8 year old son just died

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What did batman say to robin when they got to their car? Get in the car

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What do you call a mexican hopping over fences - A parkour Artist

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what is big, black, and has hair on it. a big black guy with hair.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Inform her that she is an illegitimate child resulting from a vicious, torturous rape and that her mother will never truly love her.

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Neither have I, nobody knew him.

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a horse walks into the bar. the bartender asks why the long face.

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I've done a lot of soul searching, and.... I've realized.... the & symbol really looks like a man dragging his butt on the ground.

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There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

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Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

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Five guys in white sheets chase a black man down the street. It is Halloween and all six people are close friends and enjoy goofing around.

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what shoes do pedafiles wear White vans

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what did the left nut say to the right nut? The guy above us is a real dick huh?

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A woman went outside for some fresh air.

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Why is jordan goldstein a fag cause he doesnt like my videos

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A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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