If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats worse than being mentally challenged? losing your arms and legs and finding out that you have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -51

what did the tree say to the other tree? Don't leaf me!

thumb_up thumb_down -54

one of my friends died of heartburn today :( i cant believe gav is gone

thumb_up thumb_down -39

25

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did Batman say to Superman? Nothing, he killed him with a kryptonite spear.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A guy says to a palm reader "You look like you've seen a ghost. Palm reader replies "You've got cum on your hand."

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Person 1: 'Ask me if I'm a tree' Person 2: 'Are you a tree?' Person 1: 'No.'

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I walked into an elevator with Ray Rice...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is black, white, and red all over? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

how do you make a blond girl cry? kill her family

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did Facebook say to Twitter, and twitter to blogg ant blogg to youtube? nothing. They cant talk..

thumb_up thumb_down -18

So, this joke isn't funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the pony go to the Doctor's? It had Horse AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Walt dies in breaking bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the simularity between a eagle and a rock? They both fly, exept for the rock.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? TOO FUCKING MANY

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why do Mexican's wear pointy shoes? Because its part of their culture and is used as a sign of dignity when dancing to tribal music

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops