What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Reeves Christopher

Hum... I am actually a redhead... Which is so strange saying to anyone including myself, I dye it like constantly.

How do you make someone stop talking? Shove a rock down their throat.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Neither has Stevie Wonder

Q:What were Helen Keller's dying words? A: Speaking is difficult when you have no way of hearing others. Apart from that, just hours before you die, you become unaware of your surroundings, and have a harder time communicating. Both these problems merged together made it basically impossible for her to speak before death.

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

What would Bruno Mars do if he was on the moon? Gasp and grab his throat in an attempt to get oxygen flowing into his lungs with no avail.

how do you beat up 3 year old with ease? you beat her up, 3 years can't fight for shit.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a dog

A girl asks a guy "How come you don't take me dancing anymore?" The guy said "Because we were both killed in a car accident."

What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog with no legs

There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

What's the difference between babies and butter? You can't pitchfork butter.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

How does Bob Marley like his donuts? He doesn't, he tragically died of melanoma in 1981.

Roses are black, violets are black. I'm blind.

who's a slut... you're mom

Why did the girl scream in terror? Because her parents are being murdered.

What happened when the wife refused to make her husband a sandwich? Since he was paralyzed from the neck down, he starved to death.

What did the coney say to the hotdog? At least i kill people.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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