Im a Tree... BARK BARK!!!

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long in the tooth!

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whats black and blue and white all over A little caucasian boy who is being abused by his parents

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Q: what do polo bears have for lunch A: iceburger

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What do you call a black man about to jump off a cliff? Suicidal

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What do you call a black elephant? An elephant.

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what does rain do? think of how happy its life was!

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a Jewish preist grew up in a black family. what do you call them? a loving family.

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Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

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A man walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken I don't see anything funny about this at all. -Tag

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a terrorist.

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Your dick is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

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What's worse than 10 babies stapled to a tree? The Holocaust.

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My trip to Italia: Italian most: WELCOME TO ITAAAAAAALIA! YOU WANT THE PIZZA YES? Me asking my then Italian girlfriend: Are all Italians so loud? Then girlfriend: Yeah kinda... Her brother overhearing us: WHO! GAVE! YOU THE BALLS! TO JUDGE US! Me: Uh I am just surprised at... Her bro: I SAID WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS... DONT LOOK AT ME! Me: *looking down at the ground somewhat ashamed* bro: LOOK AT ME WHEN I SPEAK TO YOU! NO! DONT LOOK AT ME! I will let you go for this time yes? Next time I will take you outside and beat you up okay? LOOK AT ME WHEN I SPEAK TO YOU! AND DO NOT LOOK AT ME! Conclusion: Wow you Italians are bad ass... I mean hell this is was a real life experience of mine, I was just a teen back then but I got a headache and threw up ending up in bed later... Fact: I am nearly two meters but walk with a hunch, the guy was half my size but still broke me down, wow Italians are bad ass...

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Gale swallows.

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What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

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How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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I HATE EVERYTHING OMG PEOPLE SUCK BOYS SUCK IM TAKING MY RAGE OUT ON THE INTERNET FDJKNDLKXC

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What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

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Whats the difference between a boy scout and a Jew? Boyscouts come back from camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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