What do you call a person with no legs playing soccer? A soccer player.

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Roses are red violets are blue im a schizophrenic and i am too.

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What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

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A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? The mexican, the black man broke his arm and the mexican is driving him to the hospital.

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A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

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A black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving Their designated driver who they carefully selected as someone they thought had enough self-control to not drink and could get both of them home safely

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what do you call a baby that's just been crushed by a piano. a mess for a cleaner to deal with. think about his health. after that he might get a disease from the body and he might not get to sleep as it is a haunting sight.

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what happened to the atheist when he died? he went to HELL

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A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

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WNBA

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A wonderful dairy product that i can not have due to the fact that i do not own it.

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My girlfriend once told me " Life is like a penis, it's hard."

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobel Nobel who? There was no bell, that's why I'm knocking you idiot

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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What do you get when you drink water? Piss.

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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A man walks into a bar with an ape. The ape defecates on the floor. The bartender ordered them both out.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Why are there no aspirin factories in the Amazon Rainforest? Because it would be unprofitable to build a factory that requires a large workforce in an uninhabited area.

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Why didn't the man fall off his bicycle? Because He wasn't riding a bicycle!

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In Soviet Russia ? ??? ??? ????????.

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Women's Professional _________

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My butt!!!!

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what's worse than fining out that the best and worst jokes on anti-joke.com are about the Holocaust The Holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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