Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have woman's rights Knock knock Who's there? NOT Sally, she's in the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why does the cow eat grass? A: Because it's green. (Cows are colorblind)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A guy walked into a bar, ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats Big, Brown, and smells like Horse Crap? Horse Crap

thumb_up thumb_down -14

roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, some dont

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What happened to the orphan who ate a sandwitch? She got hit by a whale!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

thumb_up thumb_down -9

is this the krusty crab? no this is child services were taking your children.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse then finding a repeated joke on antijokes? Finding a real joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

thumb_up thumb_down +5

nine...eleven

thumb_up thumb_down

roses r red violets r blue u jumped in the air and saw a planet to

thumb_up thumb_down -6

When does the Trogdor come? In the Niiiiighhhttttt.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

--"Do you like impressions?" -Yeah! --"Why?" ................... --"That was Socr-ates."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I meant to state that I threatened to kill him unless he refused to state that I broke his knees (and broke his wrists, I forgot to mention that too, such misery... ...Give a real man a chance here, its not every day I have to kill my mother... But you still wont hear me whining about it, asked my wife if she forgave me if I spent the rest of the day smirking, after all my mother "had visions" where my wife was Satan, which is fun, since I was also Satan the day I was born... Because my name is Nero... A NAME SHE GAVE ME! Still, not very dignifying getting the shit beat out that old hag because she was on some blend of angel dust, and still not so fun killing her by biting half her neck off... ...Literally not so fun, kinda fun? You bet, tasted disgusting, watching her choke to death was...Lets just say I have shared enough joy with you for one day.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Bride: "He went to Jared's!!! Ex: "But every Kiss Begins with Kay...."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

thumb_up thumb_down

Did you hear the Joke about the Deaf kid? Neither did he.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops