There are two fish in a tank. They both die, tanks are used for warfare.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Cause he wanted to

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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A religion is like a penis. They are both nouns.

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what the deference between a priest and acne well the acne doesn't come on the kids face tell hes thirteen

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Q: How did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: How did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was taped on to the first one!

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How did the chicken get to the other side? He crossed the road.

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Pete and Repeat were in a boat, Pete jumped out. Repeat was concerned-not only because his name was typically used as a verb and not something parents normally name a baby, but about why Pete would jump out of the boat? Pete wondered what to do next-should he jump in and see if Pete is okay? He also wondered if he should he change his name to Kevin.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Justin Bieber

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He was butchered on the farm for chicken fingers.

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Your mother is so fat, she really could stand to lose a few pounds.

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Why was the dog sweating? It was locked in a car on a hot day.

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A white guy, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a hispanic guy are standing before a cliff. They proceeded to take lovely pictures.

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Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

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Honk if you're Amish!

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There once was a boy walking over a railroad track. He got hit by a train. He died.

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What did the crazy asian man say just before he died? He didn't say anything- he was in an 18 month long coma due to a brain stem stroke. He left behind a wife, a 3 year old daughter and a newborn son.

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How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my son is gay, f**k my life...

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The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

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Stop me if you heard this one before.

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and now has two jobs to support her family.

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what did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? get down.

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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