A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Turns out a man suffering from schizophrenia believes he is a bartender for animals as his health slowly declines as his family comes to visit him every day.

How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: It depends on how hard you throw them.

What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a truck.

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

A) Knock Knock. B) Who's There? A) Me. B) Oh, well I'm in the shower, just give me five minutes. A) OK, I'll wait in the kitchen, is it cool if I heat up a hot pocket? B) Yeah sure, just not the pepperoni one, I only have one left and I was saving it for lunch. A) Alright.

kyle dosnt question his sexuality

A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

Justin Bieber.

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear asks the rabbit does shit stick to your fur? The rabbit says no, so the bear wipes his ass on the rabbit

Womens Rights.

Q.) What did the boy do when he got home? A.) He repeatedly cried due to the large amount of bullying he faced at school. He had constantly tried to contact his parents and teachers for help yet no one would listen. The boy was found dead in his room the next day. Poor kid.

a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

What happens when you throw a green stone into the red sea? It gets wet.

How did Allen Iverson compose one of the most well known interviews of all time? Practice.

What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

why did jimmy win the lottery? WAFFLE

What is the difference between a black man and a pepperoni pizza? One can actually feed a family of 4.

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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