Last week, I saw a film. As I recall it was a horror film.

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What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

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What did the deaf, blind, poor orphan get for Christmas? Cancer

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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

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What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

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roses are red violets are blue i am muslim

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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why did the semen cross the road? i wore the wrong sock today.

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How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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I smacked my crotch with the back end of a hammer. I got a free vasectomy.

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What's the difference between Stephani and a momma hippo? The mother hippo is slowly but surely losing weight while Stephani is packing on the pounds! :)

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Ill wait for you as long as you need Nero, I am just so glad you are alive and well... I know you, you would not be this chatty unless you where doing far worse, I know you will recover, dont think about the time for my sake, ill refresh this page every five minutes or so.

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What do you call a gay drive by? a fruit rollup

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What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

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who hooked up with Sinead Walker? • Liam Findlay

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cory is gay

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What do you call it one an Arab and a Jew get married? Love.

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I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog.

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Q: What did the vomiting man say to his friend? A: BLEEEAAARRRGGHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to his wife? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the waiter in the restaurant? A: BLAAAAAARGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Leonardo DiCaprio? A: BLEEEEAAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the convenience store clerk? A: BLAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to your mom? A: BLAAAARRRGGGHH!!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Barack Obama? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!! Q; What did the vomiting man say to the King of Saudi Arabia? A: BLAAAAAAAAAAAEEEAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the bartender? A: BLLLEEEEAAAARRGHHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the funeral home director? A: BLLLEEEAAAARRRGGGHHH!!

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Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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What's worse than the Holicost? Bitting into an apple and finding a worm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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