There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A duck walks into a bar he buys a drink and says To the bartender "Put it on my bill." the duck is charged With $800.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

My name is Jeff

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy This song doesn't rhyme PENIS

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Two men walk into a bar The first man says to the bartender: 'Can I have a glass of H2O?' The second man says: 'Can I have a glass of H2O too?' The Bartender gives them both glasses of water because he is not irresponsible to serve hydrogen peroxide in his bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats worse than spilling ketchup on your shirt? Getting hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances, one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends PS: the one above was wrong sorry :(

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Kid One: "Hey, you! Do you know how to spell "I CUP'?" Kid Two: " Sure, F-A-G....G-O-T..." Kid One: ".........."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats the difference between a monkey and another monkey? I dont know google it!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

are u black unlucky

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What if your name was Mr. David and the office called you down and you were wearing a dress?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are red pineapple is yellow I'll shove your head up my ass so you can eat some marshmallows!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

whats 7+4? 74

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

knock knock. no one answered so the man at the door went home.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Who won in a game of Brawl... Holden

thumb_up thumb_down -11

how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between a jew and a jew? They both died in the gas chamber.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Yo mama's so fat that she should probably go on a diet to avoid the risk of getting a cardiovascular disese.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops