How do you drown a fish? You can't , it is physically Impossible to drown a fish. because they have gills, so they are able to breathe underwater.

k

A guy walks into a bar what does he say? OW.

Sam murray got home after school one day, he siad hello to his father and possibly played some Avatar on the D.S

Nuclear Bombs are bad. But erections are good.......as long as they are stroked

Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

Why is it not safe for turkeys to do maths? Because they don't have the mental capacity to carry out the calculations correctly, which would be a danger in jobs such as engineering or the space industry. Furthermore, they are unable to understand the concept of numbers or symbols and therefore have no motivation to solve mathematical problems; and even if they did, they don't have the dexterity or education to write out the solutions.

Roses are red Violets are blue I don't like poems What rhymes with poem?

What do you get when you shoot 3 cute kittens that have just walked into the house? 3 dead kittens

Why did the man not want to be a tree? Because he didn't want to.

What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

why was the little boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face.

I used to tell people: step on my foot on purpose and ill FUCKlNG BREAK YOURS! Then I Evolved.. friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Thumb me down or step on my foot if only on mistake, and I will break off both your legs and ram them up your ASS!

What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

Obamacare!

A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

this site is an antijoke

Knock Knock Who's there? St. Judes St.Judes who ? St.Judes Research Hospital calling. Give me money, I've got cancer kids dying

What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

What is black and beats up white people? a cop you racist!

What's the difference between a black girl and a white girl? Nipple color

What sinks quickly to the bottom of a river? Your dead parents.

what the deference between a priest and acne well the acne doesn't come on the kids face tell hes thirteen

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...