Neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. It never receives it because it can't talk and is far too small to see.

chuck norris is a little b|tch

A black man and a white woman walk into a bar and celebrate their interracial marriage anniversary over a couple of drinks and then call a cab to avoid driving while intoxicated

A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

whats gayer than 2 homosexuals? 3 homosexuals.

Why did the other reindeer make fun of Rudolph? He had a small penis

how do you make a mailman mad? you sleep with his wife

What's the opposite of fly? To not fly

What did Ben's Graandma get him for Christmas? Nothing, she died on Thanksgiving!

What did the mexican do after he finished his taco? He was eaten by a dinosaur.

why did jimmy win the lottery? WAFFLE

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

what did bob say to joey, nothing joey's dead

Q: Santa Clause, the Tooth Fairy, and a rich mexican jump out of the plane at the same time. Who hit the ground first? A: The answer is none of the above, because they don't exist.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie

What did the guy say to the girl when she was on her knees? Stop playing with it put it in your mouth

One man's trash is another man's treasure is a horrible way to tell a kid that he's adopted

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, go ask the chicken.

How to stop a baby from crying? Hit it with a brick

I'm not racist. Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.

Mum: Never put off for tomorrow what can be done today. Child: Oh, I was going to play video games tomorrow, so...

A blind man walks in a bar I mean like a metal bar But it didn't hurt He only laught

Q: whats better than having sex? A: nothing

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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