What's worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two buses.

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Why did the boy eat the worm? Because his parents were starving him, and it was all he had.

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Women.

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Knock, Knock!! Who's there?! The Police!! Open the f*cking door and get down on your knees.

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running away from KFC.

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whats worse than falling off of your bike? thats as bad as it gets,try to think of something else

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I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

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How did the jew win a marathon? Through hard vigorous training by running everyday and eating healthy.

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Why didn't the boy come out of the closet? He had no legs.

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men, men like men= men+bed

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why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

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I like my women like I like my pancakes: Flipped over, inanimate, motionless, and covered in my syrup.

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What's the difference between a car tyre and 365 used condoms? One is a Goodyear. The others a fucking great year!!! San2

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Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What did the pitcher say to the batter who hit the ball very far? Wow, you hit that ball very far.

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Why was Diana crying? Because she was penetrated.

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Why was the blonde sad? Her phone was broken due to an NNEMP.

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Why didn't the baby cry? It was stillborn.

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What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

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Why did the teenager commit suicide? Because he was constantly being bullied in school, which caused him to be depressed. Days later he found out that his mother had breast cancer and was most likely not going to survive.

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Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

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Why did the long term smoker suddenly stop smoking? Because he had a heart attack.

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Fifteen out of twenty therapists is great, but five are left out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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