how do you find will smith in the snow? with rescue dogs

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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What did one theoretical physicist say to another theoretical physicist? Hey there Bill, how's Nancy and the kids doing?

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Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Communism

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obama's promises

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Stephen Hawking can walk

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knock knock who's there? hope

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Why was 8 afraid of 9? Because 9 bullied him until he became anorexic.

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Susan boyle has a belly button, Simon has a belly button, Because its only normal.

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What do you call it when a cave man pisses himself running from a t-rex? Historically incorrect.

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So its 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar....I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ends up getting nuked.

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Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Four because snakes don't have legs.

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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What's Mary short for? She's got no legs.

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Anyone??????????/

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Once upon a time, there was a man. He was black. The end.

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Batman and Robin are about to get into the Batmobile. What does Batman say? "Get in the car Robin."

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What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

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Your mom.

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Q.whats the difference between a women's argument and a knife A. a knife has a point

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You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

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Why did little Susie light herself on fire? Answer: She wanted to be warm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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