What did the black man say while getting mauled by a jungle cat? "Help im dying", as the animal riped him peice by peice with fear in his eyes he died slowly as the jungle cat draged him back to its den helplessly he fades away and the animal eats him.

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Your mom is so stupid, she stole free samples.

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how may horses can you fit in a blender i can't remember what is red and goes 100KPH a horse in a blender

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What's funny about a car accident involving three children, a widow, and a dog? Nothing.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

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jack be nimble jack be quick jack is a parapeligic.....there's no need for more

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

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Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

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Whats the difference between platinum blondes? Absolutley nothing they all look exactly the same.

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What makes the world go round? Gravity.

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What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

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Like this if you want people to stop asking to have their jokes liked.

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Once upon a time Jimmy was walking home from school. Jimmy was then confronted by a a pedophile so he suddenly ate himself.

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How do you know when a Captcha defect causes you to post the same anti-joke three times? Canteloupe.

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Hey guys I'm more of a Nets fan.

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Roses are blue Violets are red I'm bad at poetry Potato

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Three blind men walk into a bar but they were unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from them would be exploitative.

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Robin, get in the batmobile.

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Q: Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? A: A burglar

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A black man is a human, with feelings, living cells and a loving and devoted family, while a park bench is made from wood and metal and used purely for people to sit on. In parks.

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how do you get a black guy out of a tree? ask himnicely and if he doesn't promptly call the fire department

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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