Why was the trucker making noises? It was having sex with someone

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A man bets that his friend can't drink five beers in a row. His friend does it and says "See, I told you I can do it!" The man replies "No, I can't see, I'm blind."

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What is green and looks like a blue car? A Green car

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A pregnant woman walks into a bar and miscarries.

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I banged your mom so hard that she got a urinary tract infection.

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newt gingrich

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What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a woman? Two people of the opposite gender having sex.

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this is an anti joke.... Get it yet

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guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

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How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it saw an eatable life form.

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Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

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haha

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so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause your mom has cancer

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This is not an anti-joke... A man is walking down a street and see's a small boy crying in an alley. The man walks up to him and asks him "What's wrong little guy?" The boy replies that his family is poor, they just got evicted from there house and his parents decided to kill themselves. The man decides out of guilt to bring the boy home and support him for a few days. Three days later the man see's a note on the couch that says "Thank You..." Signed Jamal. The man sighs and says to himself "Your Welcome." The man walks into his room and see's the boy's body in his closet. He starts hysterically laughing and cries into his pillow for many minutes. When he is done sobbing he asks himself "What could be worst than this?" The man walks to his kitchen asking that question over and over. He reaches into his cabinet and grabs his cereal and pours into his bowl. The boy walks out chuckling and says, "Bye bye..." The man was poisoned and died. Now the boy get's the other cereal out and is about to pour it only to find out it was empty. "Screw the Holocaust this SUCKS!!!!!"

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Batman vs Superman the movie spoilers: Batman and Superman argue over how to handle some alien invaders, Batman wants to kill em, Superman believes he can save em. In the end they work together and save everybody. Moral: I hope they change the script, ever noticed how every hero vs hero themed movie/cartoon, ends up with them allying at the end? If ya do not believe me, just wait for the movie to come out.

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Knock Knock whos there? brad are you thomas brad are you thomas who? for goodness are you a parot or something

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What is the pirate's favorite letter? Z.

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Whats up with your nan? Copious amounts of lsd

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a bus? Because she's dead

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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