How is nothing something if it is nothing?...

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What did the German say to the Jew? Sorry.

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Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

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where is the world?

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What's hotter than a woman who is face down and ass up? A woman who isn't tying her shoes.

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What did the teacher say to the student? Get in the closet

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Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms.

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What did little Timmy get for Christmas? Abandoned

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What happen when Sarah made but her nose in other people's business? Her vagina got set on fire by cole and derrek shoved your head up his ass!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mom. Your mom who? Its your mom now open the danm door!

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why did the black guy kill the white guy. the white guy killed his family.

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What was the cancer patients last wish? For the pain to go away...Yolo...-Avery Scott Vartanian

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Asexuals aren't known for f***ing around.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're allergic to flowers So this poem will kill you

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knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

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Q.whats the difference between a women's argument and a knife A. a knife has a point

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Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He was killed in action and his family misses him terribly.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

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how do u wake up lady gaga? poke her face

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Why did the Nigger fuck shit? He was a shit fucking Nigger.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cot Death.

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A priest and a police officer are sitting at a bar. They both have considerable drinking problems because problems unrelated to their respective occupations. The bartender's name is Mike.

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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