A bear and a rabbit sits by a small lake in the forest, taking a shit. After a while, the bear asks the rabbit: "Do you have problems with shit hanging from you fur after you're done?" The Rabbitm ponders, and responds: "No, bear. I really don't". Than the bear wiped his ass with some moss.

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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But who would want to sell us out and why?

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A cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. Well, okay, it doesn't actually order it. It more of meows in a begging fashion and the bartender, being a kind individual, gets the lost animal a bowl of milk. But who's to argue semantics?

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Why do you walk to your bed at night? Beds cant walk.

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What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

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What are the two words that once you hear, You will feel a sudden gush of euphoria followed by immense depression? The Game

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NASCAR being considered a sport.

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what do you call a muslim driving a plane? a pilot

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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What did one pile of dirt say to the other pile of dirt?? You're dirty

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turns out hitler was right... the jews are the cause of the problems in the world

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Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

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Hitler arrives at his neighbor's barmitzfah... fashionably late.

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How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

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A teenage girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges on the other side completely unharmed.

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Why couldn't Jimmy run in the track race? Because he has been paralyzed since he was 3, due to a horrible accident

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Two Atheists walk into a bar. A nearby Christian notices this fact and proceeds to slightly preach to both of the Atheists. They then kindly explain that they don't personally believe in God, but respect the Christian's opinion. They all order drinks, and become very close friends, engaging in a long, hateless conversation.

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A baby seal walks into a bar... The bartender looks at it and says: too young.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a self-absorbed prick. And, honestly, the chicken and the road weren't that great of friends anyway.

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Not an anti-joke, but an anti-pick-up-line: How much does a polar bear weight? Not as much as you!

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A house comes around the corner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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