Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

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Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken had just escaped from the slaughterhouse where he witnessed the brutal decapitation of his entire family and in his heightened emotional state was unable to map out a safer and more sensible route.

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How many chinese women can you fit in a car? About the same amount as men.

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Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 42

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What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

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How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

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How do you get 1000 pokemon on to a bus? Pikachu!

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Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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Why was Jimi's mom sad? Because Jimi suddenly fell to the floor clenching his neck while saying "I'm Dying!"

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How did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it died. how did the second monkey fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the other monkey.

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What's worse than discovering that you have contracted HIV? Stumbling upon a mass genocide. HIV's pretty bad though.

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Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

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What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

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Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

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a little girl gets raped

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops