Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock, Knock Who's there? Anti-Joke Delivery Service. Oh, just leave it by the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why did little suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock: Who's there? Not little suzy Why did the car crash? Little suzy was driving Why didn't little suzy ride her bike home? She died of her injuries from the car crash

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse than having a spiked club shoved up your butthole? Not much.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how do you break up with someone lightly and not hurt their feeling I dont want to hurt your feeling but i hate you

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red, violets are blue No they're not, violets are violet

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was a busy highway it was hit before making it to halfway.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

LIKE FOR GANGNAM STYLE. DISLIKE FOR JUSTIN BIEBER LETS SEE WHO WINS

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is better than one trillion dollars? One trillion and one dollars... duh.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How far can a baby fly? As far as you can throw it.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I have cancer. And you're next.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

hi my name is? joe

thumb_up thumb_down

How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why do asians get good grades? Because they study very hard and want to achieve success so they can provide for their families.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I was going to write a racist joke but there was too many black people watching me.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between a bagpipe and an onion? No one cries when you cut up a bagpipe. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops