What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting constantly tortured for hours non-stop by getting your eyebrows plucked out one by one and getting your teeth pulled out and getting your arms cut open by a razor and getting your nose twisted off and getting your nipples ripped off by a pair of pliers and getting your toenails scraped off by a knife and getting a needle shoved into your eyes and getting a sword stuffed up your arse and getting your penis split in two like a hotdog and getting your balls smashed up by a sledgehammer so the sperm inside goes everywhere. I think that would be worse than dropping a dollar down the drain.

Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

Your mamma's such a whore, she sleeps with men who pay her.

6 was afraid of 7 because 7 8 9

I ran in to Hitler. "Hey, Hitler, what's up?" I asked. "Well, this time I am going to kill 6 million Jews and 2 clowns." "Two clowns?" I ask. "Why two clowns?" "See!" He exclaimed. "No one cares about the Jews!"

what is the difference between a a person and a book? people can walk

why did the kid kill himslelf? he was bullied.

Queens Park rangers

What smells like bananas but is invisible? Monkey farts

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

Microsoft Windows

Why did the wiener dog fight the cock. Because it was a cock-fight.

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

How do you kill a Chinese man? There are many ways, all of which are horrible

Why did robin get in the batmobile? Batman told him to

A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

What do you call a man who tripped on a rock? A man who tripped on a rock.

Hey, guess what. What? ... Hello? Sorry, I don't talk to strangers.

Haikus are easy But they often dont make sense flying flamingos

kk

Three men walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...