the story below is a truee story...unfortunately!!!!!!!!! :'(

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What happens when a blind man walking crashes in to man that's talking to his gang ? He wakes up in a ditch

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roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

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I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

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Three men, a doctor, a lawyer, and a biker were sitting in a bar talking over a few drinks. After a sip of his Martini, the doctor said, "You know, tomorrow is my anniversary. I bought my wife a diamond ring and a new Mercedes. I figure if she doesn't like the diamond ring, then at least she will like the Mercedes, and she will know that I love her." After finishing his scotch, the lawyer said, "Well, on my last anniversary, I bought my wife a string of pearls and a trip to the Bahamas. I figured if she didn't like the pearls, then at least she would have enjoyed the trip, and she would have known that I loved her." The biker then took a big swig from his beer, and said, "Yeah, well for my anniversary, I got my old lady a t-shirt and a vibrator. I figured if she didn't like the t-shirt, then she could go f*** herself."

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Whats the difference between a house and a truck? Ones a truck the other one is a house

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

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Why did Michael Jackson go to McDonald's? Because he was hungry.

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There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

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A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

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What do you call an black man on the moon. An astronaut you racist bastard

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Why did the man not make any change at his job? Because he is Barack Obama.

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While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

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Q: Why's everyone afraid of Friday the 13th? A: Justin Bieber's movie comes out.

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2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

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"Behold, the greatest invention Man has ever seen!" exclaimed the inventor of eyes.

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Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

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What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

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Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

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Q: What do racists call a disgusting filthy monkey that savagely jumps around in the jungle and steals white chicks? A: The same as the rest, Donkey Kong.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Police officer Police officer who? Police officer your whole family died in a car wreck last night.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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Uh, well I think of it as quirky and charming, odd weird, maybe unexpected, I could have looked it up but I am dying of lack of sleep here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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