Lil Wayne

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sean punches bryce in the face, sean then says ow you just punched me in the face. that hurt

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What is big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

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What did one Rhino say to the other? My, I'm sure glad we found this decadent watering-hole.

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How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

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The original anti joke. What is jeopardy?

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Why did the man walk up to a bank teller with a gun? He is the security guard; he wanted to ask her for financial advice.

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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Boy, do I love chicken strips. Sometimes, when I’m home alone, I’ll take some chicken strips fresh out of the oven and rub them in my scalp. It doesn’t do much for my hair health, but I like the way they feel running through my strands of hair. The flakey coating, smooth white meat, and warmth. Yum.

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kennah campion... being nice

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how do you finish a 30000 piece puzzle you search for cheat codes

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

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Who's a looser and has no friends??? Max!!! His address is 2131 HighHills Narrow...

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Sarah Palin

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A British man walks into a bar. He has to get stitches.

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whats funny about this joke? nothing.

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What is more tragic than a nice day wasted? Obesity.

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What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

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what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

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In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs and died? Because he had a stroke and never got life alert!

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A man trips on an old bottle. He picks it up and out pops a genie. "I will grant you three wishes!" says the genie. "Whatever you so desire is my com--" "I'm already late for a meeting!" shouts the man. He drops the bottle and continues on.

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what has wheels and can fly and is purple? A plane i lied about the color purple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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