What did the man say when he lost his keys? I lost my keys. What did the man say when he saw an elephant in the distance? There is an elephant in the distance.

Lethal injection is a lot more humane than the electric chair. I know because nobody's complained about it yet.

A Mexican, a Caucasian, and an African-American jump out of an airplane. They all die.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

How can you tell the person who stole your car was black? Stereotyping is wrong.

A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

What number is funnier than 23? 24.

Q) What did the cowboy say to the astronaut? A) Howdy.

My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

why did the chicken cross the road cause he was suicidal but a car just didnt happen to hit him.

Did u hear about the fire at the circus? 12 people died.

Knock Knock Who's there? Your neighbor. My neighbor who? I told you already, it's pronounced "Wu" I'm very sorry Mr. Wu.

why did the plane crash because it was 9-11

Whats big, round, and full of helium? Michaels Balloon head!

The Cubs are going to win the world series this year

I told a joke to my friends. They laughed.

Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

Why do Mexicans stink? Because they're Mexican.

Why did the black man crash his car? His low-income job forced him to buy a toyota.

Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

A man walks into a bar and approaches a man "Ask me if I'm a tree." "Fine.Are you a tree?" "No."

My life

a man walks into a bar. ouch.

How do you keep kids off your lawn? You molest them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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