What's brown and sticky? Turtle excrement.

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

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Why did the girl drop her ice cream? Because seeing as a bus was heading straight toward her, she quickly decided to sacrifice her frozen treat and dodge the oncoming vehicle in order to save her life.

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What did the man in need of a prosthetic arm get from the hospital? A diagnosis for cancer.

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What did Chuck Norris say to the puppy? Aww what a cute dog.

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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If I was, yet this syndicate was a legal one, necessary in order to maintain world peace trough the means of economical stability and such, would this be acceptable to you? Hypothetically of course.

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why was the boy sad He had a frog stapled to his face

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24

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

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Whats green and fluffy? Your mom.

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What did the black guy, the latino guy, and the asian guy all have in common? They were all human beings

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Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

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What do you call an anti joke with no punchline?

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how do you get a taco? Buy one!

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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what good about eatting every night knowing that a african want

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

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A man on his 21st birthday walks into a bar. He orders a piña colada. The bartender then replies "Sorry we do not sell piña coladas here." In disappointment, the man decides to order a different alcoholic drink and later becomes an alchoic for 20 years until he breaks his obsession and remarries his wife and has 5 kids. He then had a great life and died at age 92. He will be missed by his wife and children.

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What happens when you breed a Siberian Tiger with a California Condor? Nothing. The tiger does eat the condor though and you are found out by a neighbor and charged with animal neglect, animal cruelty, and possession of two endangered species. You are fined $100,000 and go to jail for 5 years during which you are sodomized.

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knock knock come in

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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What did the little Jew boy get for Christmas? nothing he is a Jew, he doesn't celebrate Christmas.

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What do a turtle and a tree have in common? They both can fly except for the turtle............and the tree

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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