why did chuck norris walk on water? because he's chuck norris

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What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

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How do you trick the devil? You give him a ginger.

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Spinabifita

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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What's green and has four wheel? A tractor.

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What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

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What did the unintelligent sports jock say to the band geek. Hey.

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Women's rights

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If you see Chuck Norris you should probably tell him hey for me.

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A bar walks into your mother.

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Q: What is black and can't support a family? A: A bowling ball

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Knock, Knock. Come In.

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Q: Why are there no tablets in the jungle? A: The pharmaceutical logistics involved would be enormous and would make very little business sense.

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Q: Why do police men keep killing unarmed black men? A: I don't know.

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A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

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How do you put a baby in a blender? Feet first, so you can see its expression. How do you get a baby out of a blender? With chips.

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Q: What's fat and smelly? Q: What's worse than Nikki Manaj? Q: What's the bane of everyone and everything's existence? A: Kim Kardashian

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Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

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What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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