What do you call it when someone walks on another person's head? It depends. Face up, fetish. Face down, hate crime.

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Why do basketball players wear bibs? They don't.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeleine mecanne.

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What's the warmest organ in a dead baby's body? My penis

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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I went to a restaurant, but after I ate the food felt sick, then I remembered that I ordered penis with cum Popsicles so I knew it couldn't be the food

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Why did the TV fall of a cliff? Because a nice man was donating it to the homeless shelter which hangs over a cliff. The man placed the TV in the back room on the floor. There was a weak spot on the floor and when the fattest homeless person walked over the floor, the floor broke which was a HUGE inconvenience because he TV and the fat man fell through the floor and over the cliff, luckily the TV was plugged in so it was hanging by the cord but an old lady with Alzheimer's forgot that there was a hole in the floor and unplugged the TV so she could clean the switches. In the end the TV fell off the cliff.

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What did the man with AIDS say to the other man? I have AIDS and will most likely succumb to the disease.

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Whats the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair? Cancer.

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Q: What's the difference between black and white? A: A lot...

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What did the horse say to the man? The man woke up from his dream so he didn't know either

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What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

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how do you make a quiet person talk? you water-board them

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Why did the couple stop at the stop sign? Because it's the law.

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A man walks in to a bar, so he got hurt.

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what do you call a blonde with black hair? Artificial intelligence

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I have five fingers, When will you put the ring on the one NEXT to the middle one? Never?! F you.

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What did the oncologist say to his patient? You have terminal cancer.

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Why did the blind man drown? Because he couldn't swim.

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Steven bought an apple And then he went home and fed it too his pet Jim (he was a fish and then sadly died from being overfed)

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Why did the girl miss her date? She got killed.

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My mom is such a bitch that no one will date her!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TRUE STORY!! :D

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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