How do you get a black man out of his house? you ring the doorbell.

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I love my new microwave. It comes with a list that tells just how long to cook things. Now i know how long to cook a baby for

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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A black man and a white man walk into a bar, "what will it be" said the bartender. Milk, chocolate milk.

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What did the preist say to the other preist? 'hey! we're both preists!'

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Q: Whats worse than Coke A: Diet Coke

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What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide, Get over it

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. She's already been told twice.

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a man walks into a bad part of town he is shot 13 times and dies.

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What did the rat say to the snake when it ate it. Nothing for the rat is a rat and there for can not communicate through talk to the snake nor could it survive as the snake's digestive system disintegrated it in a matter of minutes.

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Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

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Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

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In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is also blue

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So this guy and his monkey walk into a bar, I forget the rest of the joke but your mothers a whore.

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What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

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Tom and Ralph are In a verbal scuffle. Tom: your adopted ralf! Ralph: yes! Now I have lesser chance of high blood pressure!

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Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

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What do you call a puppy with no limbs? It doesn't matter, he's never coming back.

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roses are red violets are blue I hear a bus...

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I like my coffee the way I like my women.....without a penis.

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What is a mean thing to say to Stephen Hawking? Please take a seat.

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My cake is yummy, It's icing is blue. It will always be mine, Come close and I'll punch you. So stay away from it And you will be safe, But if you dont listen, Prepare ice for your face!

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Roses are red, and many other colors too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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