What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer

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Whats worse than a little kid falling. Him getting vigorously raped by his father every night.

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Why are Asians so good at math? because of their work ethic and determination to become the best at everything.rice.

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What did paul say to bill? "Hi, I'm Paul"

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Q: What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A: A pool table

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An Irish priest molested many children. He's still free today

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

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The town was so small. The ferris wheel was green.

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Your mother's breath smells so bad that it just doesn't smell very good at all.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape a duck

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a beer, drinks it and walks out.

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What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

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"Lack of sleep" is that like... Sleep deprivation?

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What do you call 1000 black men walking down a street? The million man march

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Your mama's so fat, that during her last physical checkup, her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to lose some weight before any serious medical conditions arose that would adversely affect her health and well being in a chronic fashion.

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So a man walks into a bar. Well, he trips over it because it was very low to the ground and he didn't see it.

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A class of kids were bouncing basketballs in class and a woman teacher comes in and says,"No balls in the classroom please." All the boys leave the class.

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what do you call a bomb in a plane? A dangerous threat to lives

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A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

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Whats red and dirty? Her period

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Juggling lions and breast feeding.

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your mom is so poor that she is unable to pay for your child care leaving you to have a terrible childhood, troubled adolescence, and eventually lie passed out in an alley after OD'ing off of heroin.

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What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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