Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

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why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

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fruit salad?

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What's worse than getting stabbed Getting stabbed two times

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Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

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Q-if you are what you eat ,does that make you cannibal? A- yes

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The BCS

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Knock Knock whose there? child abuse...

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Your Face.

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Nah

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What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

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What happens when you put a squid in the microwave? It dies.

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Knock knock. Why do you say the words "knock knock" without actually knocking on the door?

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A man walks into a bar but didn't say anything because he is mute.

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What can't catch or throw? A Quadriplegic

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So a baby seal walks into a club...

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What's the difference between an onion and a baby ? You cry when you cut the onion.

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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Whats the difference between the Taliban and a Football Team? I'm not on the football team.

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Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

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Why do mexicans eat tacos? Because they're good

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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