What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you....you pull the pin and trow it back

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why did the little girl fall off the swing. she had no arms so I pushed her off

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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whats black, white, and red all over? your mum

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What's more fun then spinning a dead baby around on a clothesline at 50 miles an hour? Stopping it with a shovel.

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What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

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What do cats eat for breakfast? Cat food.

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What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

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How do you save a black guy from drowning? You don't.

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Why did Ramsey fall off the seesaw? Because while he was playing with friends on a seesaw at a nearby Country Club, a very angry and insane man who had many handicaps, decided to solve his problems by killing someone. A funeral was held a week later.

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I literally died laughing

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Q: What do you call a basement full of blondes? A: A whine cellar.

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How many vampires does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Vampires do not exist

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What do you call a black thing hanging from a tree A tire swing

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It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

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a christian man asked god a question. he did not get an answer. a jewish man asked god a question. he did not get an answer. a muslim man asked god a question. he too, did not get an answer. an atheist man asked god a question. he got his answer.

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Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

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What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a human being of Aztec descent, while a bench is an inanimate object used most frequently as a place to sit.

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How do you get a dog and a baby mixed up? You stir your chili.

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you will like this because i am black.

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What do you call a baby that fell in lava Dead

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had no arms.

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Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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