How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

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A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

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I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

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Q:What do you do when you see a talking raccoon A:Quit the LSD

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he had no hands

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What is three times more dangerous than war? Three Wars.

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A guy finds a lamp in the desert and rubs it 3 times.. No genie appears because there is no such thing as Magic.

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Why is the world flat? I don't know ask the Native American who was curious enough to take his canoe, go out into the middle of the water and never come back.

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The only time your mother was ever considered "hot" was at her cremation.

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What do you call a banana that just got pealed A banana

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whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

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Three kids are playing on the swings. One of the kids falls off. He then gets up, gets back on the swing and continues playing.

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A rabbi and priest both go into a bar... and they each had a responsible number of drinks before walking home.

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Why didn't Jane text James? Because she was kidnapped.

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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mmm i love marble bumhole

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what goes plop, plop, fizz, fizz? baby twins in an acid bath.

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A person who doesn't know hungarian is trying to read the next sentence. Sajnos nem érti, mivel nem tud magyarul.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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what's funnier than hell? heaven

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need some money.

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drugs sex alcohol are as funny as AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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