Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why wasn't jimmy at Paul's party? He died in a fatal car crash and flew out y The windshield and landed in boiling oil then a dog ate him.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a tree with all of it's branches down? A tree with all of it's branches down.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

http://www.youtube.com/user/SWkangaroo

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Jew logic fail: Jew: We have endured suffering for thousands of years! Guy: And how old are you again? Jew: eight. Moral: If you see a goddamn moral in this one then post it yourself :P

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why was justin sad? his family was murdered

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what did the guy say when his partner took a poop on his chest? It was unnecessary for you to deficate onto my chest. In no way at all was that sexually stimulating, and i shall consider seeking out a new partner.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the little boy throw a clock out of the window? Because he wanted to break it.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the Old man die? He died of old age.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why didn't the chicken cross the road ? because half way acroos he got hit by a car and the animal heath care had to take him away and put him down

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock knock (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) Fuck me, that's the most echo-y door I've ever knocked on.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the doctor say to the young boy? We only planned on a annual checkup but have discovered that your and aids baby and only have 3 days to live. Tell your family members goodbye you'll be on life support in the next couple hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo. Boo Who? Boobies.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

You know how they say cats have nine lives? They don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between a woman with an IQ of 160, and a man who is mentally challenged? The woman wasnt premature and abused from an early age.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happened to the man who was hit by a car? He was immediately rushed to a hospital and was reported to have a broken femur dislocated shoulder and several broken ribs. The driver was later found and was declared driving under the influence of alcoholic beverages and the victim's family sued the driver for the medical costs. The driver was arrested and was sent to a detention center for 3 months and the victim made a complete recovery.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

223

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What did he African say when he had diarrhea? Shit

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Guess what? What. This joke isn't funny

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the tourist in Africa get? A souvenior.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops