What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What is chewy and tastes like gum? Chewing gum.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What happened when the man rubbed the magical lamp? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Knock, knock. Who's there? Me. Me Who? Me. Uh.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: Whatcha doin?? A:Ur mom. . .

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Roses are red violets are blue. I have amnesia so say hello to your nan when you get home

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Knock Knock! Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your cousin. Kathy then let Jim inside her house and helped him carry the pizza boxes into the kitchen. Everyone had fun and enjoyed the party very much that night.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why didn't the mexican have a job? because he was working on his masters degree

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What tastes worse than dog shit? White dog shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the French-Italian couple name their child? Angelo Pierre Smith, giving tribute to the father's uncle Angelo, and the mother's great-grandfather, Pierre.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A father was driving with his son. The Son asked " have you been in a car accident in the past 10 years"? The father replys " did you know you HAD 4 siblings"?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the dog say to his own poop? You gonna eat that?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

thumb_up thumb_down +23

whats similar between a eagle and a armidillo? they both can fly. apart from the armidillo.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

People always say if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say Anthony at all. Mimes must be full of hate.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What has two eyes, two arms and two legs........ a woman who lost her baby to a miscarrage.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

How do you keep a dummy in suspense for 24 hours? Tell him his wife suffered from a severe concussion and that he'll have to wait until morning to see if she's okay

thumb_up thumb_down

what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock knock Who's there The police "people began to jump out the back window"

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did the teapot say to the teacup? Nothing. Teapots and teacups are inanimate objects, therefore, cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops