What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

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Why did the man eat his wife? He was a cannibal

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c:

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A jewish man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder, the bartender asks "where'd you get that" the man replied "at a pet shop"

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How many pumpkins can you fit in a watch? Depends how much jelly is in the pumpkins

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Q:Where does a woman work at if she has a job? A: IHOP!!!

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a man got hit by a truck in brooklyn, JK he got shot, he was in brooklyn, Duh, he stumbled out in to traffic afterwards

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A man with a ski mask leaves a jewelry store He then goes back because he accidentally took the clerk's pen

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Why do black men like bit butts? Because they can not lie.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a convicted cannibalistic rapist.

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What are the black specks in birdshit called? That's birdshit too.

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Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

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How many amish people does it take to screw in a light blub? None as the amish don't require artificial light

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 800 pounds

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What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

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How do porcupines have sex? The male begins by urinating all over the female. He then enters her from behind and proceeds to thrust until the act is completed.

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What did Ed Gein get at McDonalds? The corpse of a worker he killed by the dumpster and hauled back to his shack to hang up and gut like a deer.

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What happened when Aladdin rubbed his lamp? It got slightly cleaner.

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hrih

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Three dogs start a club called the Holly Place Exclusive Dog Club. The Club Motto is, "You can't be in our club. Just us. Read the sign. It says "Exclusive". How is that confusing? Get away from here. Now."

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Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.-South Park

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others don't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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Why did the family have no Christmas tree this year? Because they are Jewish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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