How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

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Q: how do u piss off a plumber? A: kill his whole family

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What did the boy with asthma say to his friend I can't breath

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Cacti are green Clouds are white Spoons are silver Corn is yellow Carrots are orange Asphalt is black Grapes are purple Cinnamon is brown Lets's have sex

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"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

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Actually it was me Josh brown

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Two Jews walk into a bank. They make a deposit and leave.

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my candy brings all the kids to the yard and i'm like- get in the van.

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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My mom always said it was fun to jump into a pile of leaves... That was before she was devoured by a 10 ft. scorpion.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra!

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

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A man, a woman, and a kid are sitting at a table. They are eating dinner, the kid turns to the man and proceeds to explain how he wishes to drop out of school. The man sends him to his room as punishment. The man and the woman resume eating their dinner.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 1027

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What's white and capable of flash photography? A pony, I lied about the photography.

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Three Men walk into a bar. One with a ax and one with a Shovel. The other one isn't holding anything. *Boom* (\ _ /) (x . x)

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Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

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Communism ... ... ... ... ... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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A Nazi ran into a Bar.

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? Five. Two in the front, two in the back, and one in the glove compartment.

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Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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