How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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Is Carly smart? No.

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How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

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A drunk guy walks out of an AA meeting.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw a piece of food that looked yummy, and he wanted to eat it. Unfortunately, the chicken was run over by a car and died.

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How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

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What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

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when tempuratures get to high the elderly will start to DIE :( ;O

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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Q: A Jew lost a penny, a nickel, and a dime. If he found the nickel and the dime, what didn't he find? A: The Mesiah

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

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An Irish man walks into a bar, and then realizes that he's walked into the wrong establishment (He was looking for an upscale restaurant.)

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How do you make someone cry? Shit on them

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Women.

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Charlie Sheen is winning

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my life didn't start, until I met you! :) Megan _____

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Wow, thats warming to the core Nero, you are really sweet when you want to, I was having a lot more than second thoughts, I mean I do not mind the thought of sex with you really and I mean that, but losing who I already consider my best friend would just be sad. So uh, sex once huh? I mean, one more feather on the uh, hat thing, is that what this is about to you?

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Where did susie go after the explosion? everywhere. What was susie after the explosion? a puzzle.

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What happens when you lay a diamond in the water for two hours? It gets wet.

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Hey

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So three black men walk into a bank, one of them uses the ATM, they all proceed to the exit after he is done.

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why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

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Today I looked at a clock and realized that I was late.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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