What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

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I love you, you live me. Now get the FUDGE out of the tree!!!

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Two people are sitting on a 10th story window sill. They both fall off and die.

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

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What's grosser than gross? Grossest.

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Hey, guess what. What? ... Hello? Sorry, I don't talk to strangers.

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a blonde and a brunet are in an elevator. a man walks in the brunet says to the blonde "he has dandruff, he needs head and shoulders.' then the blonde says "we can give him head, but how can we give him shoulders."

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

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A black man was walking down the street wearing a ski mask. It was cold outside.

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Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

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Knock-Knock Come in! ...

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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Why did old Dorris shit herself? Because Margaret fell over.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing, she had no arms. Knock Knock Who’s there? Not Sarah.

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A woman leaves the kitchen.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've tested positive for herpes We probably shouldn't have intercourse

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what rhymes with ham and bread? girl, make me a sandwich

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25

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Two Mexicans walk into a bar, The bartender says your hired.

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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