What do you call cat that is on fire? Nigel.

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

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What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

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What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a porsche in my garage.

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Whats worse than a baby crying on a plane. 9/11

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty-four year olds? There's 20 of them.

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One day, John ate some food. He quickly realized he had an upsetting feeling in his stomach, so he stopped eating food and used the restroom. Then he drew a picture.

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whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

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A: What are the nine most terrifying words in the English dictionary? B: What are they? A: I'm from the government and i'm here to help

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Why did Billy fall off the slide? Someone threw a refridgerator at his face.

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Yo momma so fat she should be concerned of contracting Coronary Heart Disease, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, abnormal blood fats, metabolic syndrome, cancer, osteoarthritis, sleep apnea, or even obesity hypoventilation syndrome

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Where did the girl go after the explosion? Everywhere

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yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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I like my coffee like i like my woman.... with big titis.

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Why did the jew ask for $10 back after he lent a boy $2? Because of inflation

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This joke is the worst joke ever.

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a young mother cow died in a street crossing by a large oil truck, she was never buried and became infested with maggots in the next few days

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what did the african boy get for christmas - not food

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Why did Suzy cross the road? She didn't she got hit by a bus. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

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What is the worst joke to tell a Orphan? Knock Knock Who's there Not your parents ( Man than slams door in little girls face)

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Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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