A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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An elephant walks in to a dry cleaners and asks the Chinese man behind the counter for the price of cleaning two shirts. The man replies, "$3.00."

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http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+funny&hl=en&safe=active&biw=1024&bih=398&gbv=2&tbm=isch&tbnid=lc8_fNCatYHOqM:&imgrefurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/harry-being-typical-harry/&docid=86Gw8eNJ73tOYM&imgurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/cms/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/harry-styles-300.jpg&w=300&h=400&ei=q4vHT9XwHYL48gSJoJzJDw&zoom=1

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Why was the boy un-able to talk He was retarded

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why did the dog chase the cat? because the cat chased the dog first.

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Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

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This is my rifle, this is my gun, one is for shooting, the other is decorative.

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How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

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Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

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Friends are like potatoes, If you eat them, they will die.

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if you like, i will tell my crush maddy i love her, just kidding i wont do shit.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, Herp Derp

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by 5 black guys? A family friend paying a visit.

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my girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile, thats a big word for a 3 year old

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas Nothing he didnt live that long

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Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

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Q: What do you do when your friend tells you he murdered someone? A: Call the police.

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because it tastes good.

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Why did a black kid kill his teacher? No reason. That what they do

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Want to know a joke? There is no joke.

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Person 1: want to hear a joke? person 2: yes.

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What did the cab driver say to the duck who wanted a ride in the cab? Get out of the cab.

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what do an black ,am and a bicycle have in comman there both objects

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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