Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm drunk, I want Taco Bell.

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how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

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people can be soooo loud!!!!!!! sooo loud that they wake up helen keller!!!!!!

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and strangled the child.

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of it's legs.

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Why was ticklish Tom not ticklish anymore? A: he got hit by a train

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what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

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Two men walked into a bar. I'm surprised the second man did not duck out of the way.

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They should introduce a filtering system on here. That way any repeated jokes, or idiots taking up a page with a copy and paste routine, could be simply erased by those who are bored with them or find them irritating. [L]

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock Who's there THE CHICKEN

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How do you know when your sister's on her period? Your dad's dick tastes like blood

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Cigarettes are a lot like hamsters. Perfectly harmless until you put them in your mouth and catch them on fire.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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A: Knock, knock A: Knock, knock A: Um, knock, knock! B: Sorry, I was pretending that I wasn't home.

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What would you like to drink? A Pepsi. Is Coca-Cola okay? No.

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whats worse than a leaf in your bed? World hunger, global warming, the economy......

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What do you call a broken boomarang? A stick.

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Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness." "Jehovah's witness, who?" "Just Jehovah's Witness. Your doorbell is not working."

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A grandma says come on twinkies and the teinkies say were terriosts from your lost hole

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please dis this joke, I want to get to the bottom of the leaderboard!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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