What's a pirate's favorite letter? None of them. He can't read.

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Why did the blonde kid lose the spelling bee? Because she misspelled a word.

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Sorry, had it not been for my contacts, you would all have ended up in prison because of "The Wiz", I know you got a clean plate, but this guy was doing some seriously dirty laundry claiming to be working for "The Order", again it is best you all keep low, I will make sure my men evacuate this place as soon as we have rigged the game to your favor. As far as we can tell, he was the only one leaking Intel, but I suggest you keep an close eye on the rest of your boys and girls.

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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What do a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it the harder it gets.

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whats purple and has legs? Nothing, i lied about both

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Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

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Why did the car slam its brakes on? There was a infant under the bonnet.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who?

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Como estan lo que sienta in el tarea de tomo caliente? A. Los sientos! ~ this is why nobody likes Spanish

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How did Helen Keller's Parents punished her? The put a doorknob on her door.

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What did the man do after his wife died? He farted.

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What would Martin Luther King Jr. be today if he was white? Alive.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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How do you tell if an albino baby is black? Check his genetics.

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Why did the blonde jump over the glass wall? To see what was on the other side.

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped after getting raped.

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Why was the kid picking his nose. Because someone shoved a bomb in it.

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Why did the woman die Because she was old

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RACIST JOKE: how to start a footrace in ghana role a donut down a hill

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What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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