A mother had three kids: 1st kid- “Mom, why did you name me Daisy?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a daisy fell on your head.” 2nd kid- “Mommy, why did you name me Rose?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a rose fell on your head.” 3rd kid- “Blahblahblahflismdjsk” *makes retarded noises* Mom- “SHUT UP BRICK!”

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a black hitch-hiker? Stranded

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Dad, why do people say mom is a nympho? No idea son, try asking one of your other dads.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

how long has dibey got left like :)

thumb_up thumb_down -29

u NoT mY dAd HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's worse than an apple with a worm? Serial Murder.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between a stepfather and a turkey? A stepfather is a man who married a woman who has already had a family with another man but the man does not mind because he has fallen deeply in love with her and wants to spend the rest of his life with the woman. A turkey is completely different in many respects.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is it about homosexuals that's so gay? What is it about heterosexuals that's so straight? What is it about an apple that's so gay?(Because it's a FRUIT right?) What is it about penises that's so straight?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A:why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side =D B:...i dont think you fully grasp the concept of an anti joke yet...smh -.-

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Knock knock? Whos there? the Chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why does a Jew, a catholic, and a buddhist eat pizza? because they like the way it tastes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why are black people afraid of white people? Over two hundred years of oppression.

thumb_up thumb_down +153

Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Cashier: Have a nice day sir! Grumpy man: Don't tell me what kind of day to have ya fruit!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

give my joke a thumbs up Please!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: Why did Sally not like her trip to Hawaii? A: A volcano erupted and killed her whole family.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

if i could change the alphabet, i wouldn't its perfectly fine the way it is.

thumb_up thumb_down +184

What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Eddie Murphy's recent film career.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops