Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

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teacher: what do you call a math book with no writing in it?! student: idk what? teacher: a notebook! student: ok... thanks

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

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Why did a man get arrested in a bar He was covered in bombs and charged with terrorism

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What did the pregnant teenager get for her birthday? An abortion.

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whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

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Why couldn't the black kid buy a bike? He had no money.

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Dad, they tell me I am a slowpoke at school, what can I do? ... Eh son, this is mommy, your dad died ten years ago remember?

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What do you call A potato who is covered in red refrigerators and is known as a potato. Fallafal

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How much dirt was in a hole that was 6 feet wide and 6 feet deep? None. It's a hole.

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Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

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Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? ...Because he was buried in a churchyard.

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

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Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

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Why did the man smell like french toast? His wife previously made him a plate of it that he ate before walking out of the house.

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knock knock who's there who who who who who what are you a retarded owl

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A mosquito flies into a bar and orders a bloody mary, the bartender then takes out a swatter and kills the pest. Noticing the event, the patrons cheer and continued drinking their frothy beverage. Minutes later, the phone rings and the bartender answers the phone. "Hello?" "Hi, I'm looking for a friend of mine, is he there?" "Let me check, by the way, what's his name?" "Jack Hoff" "One sec. HEY FELLAS(yelling over the noisy bar), IS THERE A JACK HOFF HERE? I NEED A JACK HOFF! ANYONE?" Mr. Hoff, sitting at the bar hears this and asks, "who is it?" "He said he's a friend of yours!" "Which one?" " He said his name's Dick Stroker and he needs help on something hardhe'll meet you around back." "Oh ok, thanks."

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A fish walks into a bad Fish dont walk

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What is black at the bottom, and white at the top? Society.

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what glows blue and howls at the moon at midnight? I dont know but i had sex with your mother.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cook Pu. Ok then. Kelvin Yang.

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Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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