What do you call a guy who can't get a girlfriend? Me.

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9/11

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Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map. Maria: This is it. Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America? Class: Maria did.

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Why shouldn't you drink and drive? Because you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

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wat do call a joke thats funny a funny joke

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Sally." "Go away, Sally. I told you I am not interested." Kevin slammed the door on his colleague, as Sally proceeded to find somebody else and move on with her life. Kevin later in life became a drug addict, and got thrown in jail. Sally got married and had four kids, and while she feels bad for Kevin, she is happy with her life.

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Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

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Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

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Why are birds purple? because it fits the sky why are bats purple? bats aren't purple

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CHAD'S A FAG!!!

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what happens when u mix a car, a blimp and a plane? I don't know.

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How can you tell Santa is racist? He doesn't give Africans presents.

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Why was the old man on the floor? He fell

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what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. It is a gun store and he needs to buy amunition after using all of his to fend of a home invader, and protect his family. He lives in a bad area because he never went to college and cannot get a well paying job in this economy, so he can't afford to buy a house in a better area He then used the gun to rob a bank. He no longer lives in a poor area

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Why did little tommy fall in the well. Because he grew tired of his life of brutal Beatings and starvation, so he jumped.

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What's big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? Your mom.

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A woman was struck and killed by a truck as she crossed the road. Who's fault is it? The woman's, if she hadn't left the kitchen, she would still be making me sandwitches...

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What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

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Q. What do you do when you cross an elephant, and a soccer ball. A. That would never happen.

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knock knock how there me ok come in

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how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

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Why did the girl hang up on her boyfriend? Because the roof collapsed on her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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