A black man is packing heat while driving his car. He is a police officer

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w8's white and speaks russian a russian stronk

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman... They all died in a horrible train wreck.

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You:why did the kid get a massage? Guest:Why? You:Cuz he wanted one.

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A Psychologist said that I am a pessimist... Figures.

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What's a pirate's favorite color? Depends on the pirate.

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So a man walking down a nature trail came across an injured fox laying on the ground in pain, it looked like it was attacked recently. There wasn't much the man could do at the time, so he gently picked up the fox and rushed the fox to his house. The man arrives moments later at his house with the fox. There were a lot of options the man could choose, but he went with a simple recipe. The man grabbed a knife and gutted the fox, removing all unnecessary organs. He then skinned the fox of it's fur. He sliced the head off, cut the legs to a stub, and stuffed it. He gave it a nice seasoning and placed it in the oven at about 350F for 6 hours. When the fox was perfectly cooked, it was taken out of the oven and left to sit for about 5 minutes to cool. He cut a chunk of meat from the dish and sat down to eat. "What a fine meal" the man said.

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EVERYBODY THUMB THIS JOKE DOWN

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What do you get when you cross a leopard and Chuck Norris? I don't know. Probably something like a furry yellow Chuck Norris with black spots and sharp teeth.

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I asked the librarian where to find a specific book. She told me where it was.

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A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

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A: Why are black people so good at sports? B: Practice and determination.

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Why does a gay guy come out of the closet? He can't see anything inside.

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A 75 year old man walks into a college classroom and sits down. He suffers from severe dementia and realizes that he's been in the classroom before. A 75 year old man walks into a college classroom...

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How many Ethiopian's can you fit in a bathtub? As many as you want, they'd all fall down the drain. JimBoto

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch."

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -None, they will pay for somebody else to do it

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There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead who sit next to each other in college. They are good students and regularly do their homework.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

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What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

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I was chatting to a woman in a bar, when the subject of kids came up. I said, "My son has had to wear nappies for his entire life." "That's awful," she said, "what's wrong with him?" I replied, "Nothing. He's two and a half."

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? A tragic drowning victim. And later, food for sharks, probably.

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I am so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.

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What's a good joke? Not this one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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