Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese.

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why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

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What do you call a black man wearing tights? Rick

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Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

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What did the dog say to the human? Nothing really. Dogs technically "speak" through barking.

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What bad thing could happen if you gave a black man a gun? ....stop expecting some racist punchline!

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing. I don't know. Why? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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2 Jews walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks and call a cab to get home

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Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

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What happened when the boy got caught with his hand in the cookie jar? He gets shot in the face by Santa.

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an elephant is like a guy but its nose is the di**

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Why do black people enjoy watermelon? Because it tastes good.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife just died from pancreatic cancer."

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Whats worse than not coming up with an original anti joke? Nothing.

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Your mumma is so fat, she has diabetes.

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why did the irishman need plastic surgery? because after the bear attack where there used to be a face there is now a gap

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Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

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What happens if you type "Michael Jackson" divided by "Friends" on a calculator? DIVIDE BY 0 ERROR.

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What's red and green? A frog in a blender

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There once were 2 cowboys who were lost on a dusty trail. Later on they found their way out and are now doing very successful

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How do you stop a air plane? You throw small infants into the turbine.

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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