What did the boy without arms get in his Christmas present? A pair of gloves. Just kidding, he didn't open it yet.

What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

Roses are red. I had no clue. I like pie. So screw you.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? NOT SALLY

How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

how did the tree fall on the woman? it didnt, trees dont grow in kitchens

Q-What do you call kids who go to school? A- Students.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Cheese that isn't yours

what did the black women name her child jamaal

I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? Sitting on a black man is just plain rude.

I C U P White stuff

I love you. You love me. I killed you're family. No you're an orphan.

why did the chicken cross the road? because colonel sanders was chasing it with an axe

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

82

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

Why did one sausage become scared of the other sausage? The first Sausage said " Hello " and the second Sausage said " OMG a talking sausage!!!" ...Jk sausages dont talk.

Yo momma so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.

Q: How do Hellen Keller's parents punish her? A: They give her a timeout

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...