What is the answer to the question of life? Over 9000

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the dog jump into the pool? because the cat was chasing him

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what is the worst thing a bout four black men driving a Cadillac off a cliff? they were my friends

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

thumb_up thumb_down -31

So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a mammal.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats pink and looked like an angry bulldog? Your moms vagina last night

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? like most animals that wander onto the road, it was completely unaware that the road can be very dangerous. It didn't go onto the road on purpose, it simply treated the road as if it was just like the rest of the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the girl fall off the swing ? Because she lost her balance and the force of gravity put upon her was too great for her to bear, resulting in her fall.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a dead black man? A corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Coach: Hey, you missed the team meeting today, but I wanted to let you know we've had a number of changes to the lineup. Player: Really? Who's on first? Coach: That's right. A man with the unlikely name of Mr. Who is on first. We also have Mr. What on second, and Mr. I Don't Know is on third. The rest of the team is the same. Player: Oh. People have weird names now. But I'm sure they're great guys. Thanks for explaining that. Coach: Any time. Don't mention it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Which one is hardest?

thumb_up thumb_down +53

What do an owl and a squirrel have in common? They can both fly! Except for the squirrel.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock knock? Who's there? Llama. Llama who? Llamas aren't racist unlike that bastard Ann Coulter. That's why they can get a carrot up the ass and she can't.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

No, you think faster smarter and harder than everyone I know, you change and adapt faster for each day, sometimes I just think one has to stop asking oneself what makes one happy, and simply choose to be happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the little orphan girl get for christmas? nothing her parents are dead

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops