How do you kill a fox? With a gun. How do you kill a deer? With a gun.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You like penis, That's what you live up to.

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why did the duck swim upside-down -he was on quack

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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A blonde girl gets in a bad car accident . A man stops on the side of the road to help her . She is panicking The man gets out a piece of chalk and draw a small circle. He says "Do not step out of this circle" The man smashes her car with a baseball bat She giggles He rolls her car down the hill, She laughs Her car is on fire , She is cracking up He yells " WHAT IS SO FUNNY " She says , "I stepped out of the circle three times when you weren't looking"

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Why didn't the little boy wake up today? Because he's dead

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What do you call a hobo that lives a in a box. A hobo

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Why did the woman pay $5,000 for a gallon of milk? She didn't. She paid $2.99.

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How do you kill the President of the United States? Your name has been reported to the authorities.

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Whats the difference between a Cadillac and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

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What's the differece between a rock and a black guy? A rock can't eat fried chicken.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't because it got hit by a car.

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#Last Christmas I gave you my heart #And as far as I know #The transplant was a complete sucess #And you have recovered from your operation #And are now well again #This year to save me from tears #I'll donate my kidneys

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Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

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Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

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one fish two fish red fish kill the fish

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A bear just broke into my house and im scared…...... Oh wait thats just my 350 pound teacher… now i'm even scareder

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A:Knock Knock, B:Who's There? A:Orange, B:Orange Who? A:Orange Banana.

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How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

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Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

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Why did bob die Cause he got hit by a mailbox

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A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

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what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Just two animals that are judged.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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