How is a hamster like a cigarette? They are harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire

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Your mother's so fat that affects her self esteem.

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Jake: Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Steve: She had no Arms. Jake: Knock Knock Steve: Who is there? Jake: Not Sarah

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Q. what did the refuge from uganda say to his mom when he was riding his bike A. look ma no hands.....

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A man walks into a doctors and says 'Doctor, Doctor, I have a bad stomach ache' Upon hearing this, the doctor writes the man a prescription for medication and wishes him a swift recovery.

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What is the difference between a mom and a dad? One is a mom and the other is a dad. Why couldn't Fred see the board? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Luckily Captain America was able to rescue Hitler just before he was trapped in the ice for many years... Thanks to his brave efforts the war continued many more years! Captain America under ice: Why do I get the feeling I did something wrong? Hmm... 30 years later Cap: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMNNNNNN!!!!!! Moral: On ice, tickets sold out... no clothing required, ladies only, None under 16!

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Whats 2+1? 2.

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What is 2+2? 4!

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A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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Loner.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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You're a fat chubby McChubchub fatty fatchub because your fat chubby McChubchubfattychub poop is on your fatty fat Mcphat face of fatchubness because you are the fatty lord of McChubby fat kings.

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a swing set? No? Well neither did she.

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Why did the black man cry? He had no rights.

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A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

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cliché rebecca black joke.

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You die of loss of blood, under a pile of first-aid kits

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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how do you wake up lady gaga? you throw her on the ground.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, the chicken is dead.

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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what are three words that are never used together in the same sentence ...... salid taste good

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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