How are JFK and Jimmy Neutron similar? They both had brain blasts.

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roses are red, violets are blue. Barack Obama says, nice to meet you.

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A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

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a fat girl walks into McDonalds....

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wow such mark very mark many mark so mark

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Youre mom is so dead...

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What did the pope do when he saw the grinch? He prayed for his soul.

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What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

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Why is limety snicket a kike pussy? cuz will ferrell shit in his asshole

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How do you push a blond off a cliff? Push here.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a convicted cannibalistic rapist.

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Whats the difference between a crucifixion and a circumcision? In crucifixion you throw out the whole Jew.

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What was the blind man doing on the bridge? Getting struck by lightning.

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What's worse than the titanic sinking 9-11

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Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the little child orphan with no arms or legs get for christmas? CANCER and for his birthday A.I.D.S. R.I.P little orphan

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Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea but I don't see why it would want to cross a road in the first place. It is a chicken.

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Whats funnier than a real joke? An anti joke

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A woman walks into a bar.

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what did the slave say to the slave owner i like your car

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How do you catch a Jew? Just give him a little shower ;)

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Chuck Norris and 2 other cowboys were out in the old west. After a long day of travel in the desert, the three of them set up camp for the night. Having sat around their fire silently for some time, the first of the cowboys decided to speak up. "You know," he said, "I believe I am the manliest man here! Why, this one time I was riding all alone through the desert on my manly horse when I stumbled upon a town that had no name. Upon entering the town, I realized that the townspeople were in a panic. Everyone was fleeing for their lives and screaming. So I grabbed the nearest woman to me around the neck and demanded of her, 'What the hell is going on around here?!!!' The woman, terrified, only managed to stammer and point. Low and behold, there was a wild bull skewering people through the heart. So, what did I do? I got down off my tall horse and grabbed the bull by the horns and looked him straight in the eyes, broke his neck, crushed his testicles, rammed my fist into his chest, pulled out his heart and ate it! That is how much of a man I am!" There was silence quite for a while. Soon the other cowboy cleared his voice and said: "You, know, that's pretty good, but I am more of a man than that! Why, this one time, me and a few of my manly buddies were off on a horse trip. I was bringing up the rear of the line when all of a sudden I heard a commotion at the front of the line. Kicking my fine horse with my spurs, I raced ahead to see what was the matter. Low and behold, there was a twenty-foot rattler that had consumed my friend whole! So, what did I do? I got down off my tall horse and ran over to the snake, grabbed him around the neck, crushed his testicles, bit off his head, sucked the venom from its cold, lifeless body and then spit it upon the dry ground like acid! That is how much of a man I am!" After this, there was another silence. The two cowboys looked one another over, each recognizing the other to be a fine specimen of what it is to be a man. They then both patiently waited to hear Chuck Norris' response. But there was only silence. Off in the distance an owl hooted. A coyote howled. Still, silence. Chuck Norris didn't say a word; he merely continued to sit calmly and stir the coals of the fire with his penis.

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How do you get a girl to pay for food? You Rape Her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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