Did you here about the guy who got his right leg and right arm cut off? I made him up but he would make one good anti-joke.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have Alzheimer's, CHEESE ON TOAST

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Q:What did the midget say to the toll booth operator? A: Is your family dead too?

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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how do you kill a bird? tie it to a tree throw a wasp nest at it and run the tree over with a semi filled with manure

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what do you call five mexicans pushing a truck up a hill? Five mexicans stuck in the middle of nowhere looking for an auto mechanic.

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Why did women scream loudly!? As the women was unexpectadly frightend!

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I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jim. Oh, come in Jim!

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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Ever hear the joke about the blind guy taking care of the baby ? ... Good, because it's not funny to make fun of blind people and I doubt a blind guy would ever be legally taking care of a baby.

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What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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What's red, fast, and flies through the air? A tomato in a plane.

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What's brown and smells like poop? A monkey.

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A man is working at a bar. He feels a fly graze his left index finger, which has become a bit sweaty. The man rubs the finger for a moment, then continues to slice grapes for a customers synthetic japanese glue farm.

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Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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How do u know what a ass is. You no once you meet adam mac.

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

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there is a mexican and a black guy in the back of a car, who is driving? The cop

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Knock, Knock. I have no door.

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Yo mama so stupid, she should be worried about Alzheimer's disease.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out if the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, Monkey do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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