What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

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a mother cow walks up to her three child cows. the first cow asks: "mom, why am i named rose?" the mother responds with: "because when you were a baby, a rose petal fell on your head." the second cow asks: "what about me, mom?" the mother says: "when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." the third cow says: "AAAAOOOOOOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO!" the mother screams: "SHUT UP REFRIDGERATOR."

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

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Tilt your screen back .

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it with an axe.

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there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

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Roses are red, Violets are Violets. Screw this poem. Potato.

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Why didn't Billy have legs? Because he's a fish.

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i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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What did the cover say when it fell off the bed? Oh sheet!

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm only 13 so if you have sex with me it's illegal.

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What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

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Little Stephanie was up all night on Christmas eve excited for her new bike that Santa was going to bring her. After tossing and turning for what seemed like decades, the sunset finally arose and Stephanie ran down the steps to unwrap her new bike with the family. Immediately after she went down the staircase, she found her parents marinated in their own blood, with knife wounds all around their body.

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Why didn't suzie go to school yesterday? She was brutally hacked into pieces and now she"ll never experience school again

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Did the Chicken cross the road? No the road moved the chicken across.

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy mad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy in pain? A: Because a clown was ripping off the boys big toes with a hacksaw, all the while causing the small boy emotional pains by killing the boy's orange cat.

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Yo momma so fat, she's in the hospital dying of morbid obesity. Sorry man.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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What was wrong with the black guy? He was black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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