what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

thumb_up thumb_down

How did the Mexican get into the U.S.A.? He came in legally, and got his green card. He then continued his life as a business man and won the lottery four years later for 5 million dollars. He then bought a cool television, he also had children and put the money in their college funds later.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He has no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Oh," the boy says. "Well BUENOS DIAS to you too!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a smelly black person? An African american with poor hygiene

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was the black man sad? Because his wife and children had been killed in a freak car accident while he had been driving.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why does the world spin? Chuck Norris says so

thumb_up thumb_down +12

The NHL playoffs

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's a boomerang that never comes back to you? A stick. :/

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats gayer than driving a prius Buttsex

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats worse than Sandy Hook Massacre? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and broccoli? A lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What worse than stubbing your toe? Getting raped by a panda.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why should this joke be funny? It shouldn't, because its an anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None,it eats plants.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road To get to the gay guys house Knock knock Who is there The chicken!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The loss of originality in anti joke formats. And hypocrisy.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did batman say to robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Roses are red Violets are red Daisies are red Tulips are red Magnolias are red Weeds are red Carnations are red Crap, my gardens on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

yo mama so dumb that we sat her down to take a standardized, comprehensive IQ test measuring spatial, logical, linguistic, and memorization abilities. Her aggregate score was an 87, indicated she is roughly one standard deviation below the mean of the population, which is not low enough to qualify for government assistance under the Americans with Disabilities Act (1990) but does impede her understanding of more complex abstract concepts and things pertaining to higher culture. In spite of this, she has raised a child of average intelligence, and has retained the same job at Walgreen's for 14 years, People seem to like her because she is polite and rarely late. Your mother is an inspiration to low-IQ people living in high-IQ developed countries, demonstrating that an inability to fully understand abstracts does necessarily lead to a life of meagerness and frustration, so long as you work hard, keep your spirits high, and accept Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

i have a christmas tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q:Why did the man fall down the stairs? A:Because someone pushed him down.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops