How do you know when some one is a complete dick? When they hit the prestige buttom in Black Ops when your taking a dump. N.P.P.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

1 tip for a flat belly so eating so much u fat bitch

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did one cat say to the other cat? Meow. What did one dog say to the other dog? Meow. Why was the man sad? He had a retarded dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q. Dr.evil? JHHHHHHHHOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock knock *silence* Knock knock *silence* KNOCK KNOCK! Hey! Can't you read the sign?! It's says "Do Not Disturb!"

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Do you like waffles yeah we like waffles do you like pancakes do you like french toast yeah we like french toast dododododod let me get a mouth full. WAFFLES!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's funnier then a dead baby. Two dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you get a pirate out of your seat? Politely ask him to move for you were there first.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the girl say to the boy? You are a boy.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

glasses, jacket, shirt They call me glasses, jacket, shirt man. I never leave the house...without my brodies. hehehe hahaha hohoho!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's brown and sticky? A piece of toffee, which is brown and/or dark brown in color.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a latino with a limp? John...his name is John

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops