when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

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Why is the guy fat? Because he eats too much.

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what lies in ore an develops a golden tan ken bigleys body

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why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

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What happened when the boy got sad He fell in a woodchipper

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What did the chipmunk say to the nut? I'm gonna eat you.

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Why did the man rob a convenience store? Don't ask why, call the police! He could be robbing more stores!

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Why was the baby flying? Because it's face was stapled to the propeller of a helicopter.

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What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Heroshima

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why did sally fall of the swing? because she had no arms... knock knock? (whos there) not sally

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Anti-joke.com

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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How many Caucasian American males does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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Why don't women bother to have penises? Because they're lazy and they don't care.

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Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

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What's the difference between a cat and a banana? One is a cat, the other is a banana.

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whats worse than being payton johnson being black

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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