What did the lawyer say to the lawyer We are both lawyers

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Q, Where did Rebecca Black go to eat? A. TGI Fridays

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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A new family have moved in next to me. They have three little kids and they've challenged me to a water fight in the back yard, so I'm just writing this while I'm waiting for the kettle to boil

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What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

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What's worse than having amnesia? I don't remember.

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One man's trash is another man's treasure is a horrible way to tell a kid that he's adopted

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Why was the plumber very sad Because i killed his family

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a jewish man walks into a wall with an erection. what hits first? his erection

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a man paints himself yello shrinks himself and walks into a baber shop then he relizes that the sizers are yello so he gets cut up into shreds and dies. THE END!

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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What did the ginger say to god? Nothing it has no soul

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What do a bench and a mexican have in common? (don't worry it's not racist) You'll find both in a park. (I lied)

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why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

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How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

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what kind of animals marriage is high? snails because It has home and car.

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How do chinese people call the firemen? By phone.

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Why do black guys have white palms? Because that area of the human hand contains no melanocytes, the cells that allow pigment to form.

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There were two ducks in a bathtub. One duck says to the other, "Pass me the soap" The other duck replies, "What do i look like, a toaster?"

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Guys, I think I'm gonna apply to join the Crips. My SAT score is a 2050, and their average score is a 2200. My GPA, however, is a 4.6, and their average is only a 4.2. Do you guys think that they will take me? Or should I try and apply for the Bloods?

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A blonde walks into a bar and orders a drink. The end.

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What did Tarzan say when the elephants came over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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