knock, knock... no one replies and it becomes obvious that no one is in the house.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's worse than the holocaust? Another holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Three french men are in the car wearing sombreros. They're trying to get to Disney World.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

OBAMA and the DEMOCRATS

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did people have cold showers in the old days? Because there was no electricity back then, making it hard to heat water to a temperature that was classified as 'warm'.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why couldn't Dumbo fly? Because he had just been killed by an African Poacher, and dead elephants can't fly. This is very sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do dogs call gaseous exchange? Woof!!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Did you hear about the guy who came onto his best friend's wife? Yeah, she handed him some kleenex after and told him to wipe it off.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

thumb_up thumb_down -17

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Where do black people get there hair cut? At a hairdresser.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call cat that is on fire? Nigel.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How did the two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for half an hr? They didn't and they died.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's Kanye West's goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what do you call a man with no @ss? d1ckhead

thumb_up thumb_down -76

How can you tell if a substance is an acid or a base just by looking at it? You can't. pH or Litmus paper would be necessary in order to determine whether a substance is an acid or a base.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Whats big orange and likes to eat rocks? a big orange rock eater

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A black man and a white woman walk into a bar and celebrate their interracial marriage anniversary over a couple of drinks and then call a cab to avoid driving while intoxicated

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Did you hear about the Irish man that accidently killed himself,he farted in the bath & drowned trying to smell it

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops