what can you say about a midget dressed as a clown? he had a terrible childhood.

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No...........

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Q: What's long and brown? A: The unemployment line.

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When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

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what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

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Your momma's so ugly, she has endure self-esteem issues relating to her appearance that have plagued her since grade school.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "Damn! I should've voted Democrat!"

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Why didn't Billy's parents get him any birthday presents? Billy was an accident.

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What did the T-rex say to the velociraptor? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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What did the mormon say when he complemented the gay person? Nothing, because mormons hate gays.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road A. Because he needed to get to the other side

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What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

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Why don't you see elephants find in trees? Because most trees can't hold an elephants weight.

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What happened when the Trayvon Martin was shot? The media made a huge deal about it and is now making ridicoulus claims that George Zimmerman is racist, and such claims are infringing on his right to a fair trial, and it's all because Trayvon Martin is black.

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I mustache you a question. But I'll shave it for later.

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What happened to the soccer player when he got kicked in the leg..... He cried on the ground for hours even though there is padding there

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog with no legs

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how you throw 'em.

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Why was the boy named Bethel? He had horrible parents that wanted him to live a life of social poverty.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know... I thought no one knew the answer to that question...

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Roses are red, violets are blue, purple is a color, I like grilled cheese

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whats the difference between me and callum ? one soul.

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What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

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1 friend request facebook: ignore. Nuff said

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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