How much do polar bears weigh? Between 800 and 1600 pounds

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Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

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Robert supra not deep throwing kaleb law wrench

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Why did the old man order the little girl into the car? Because he was her grandfather.

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I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

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Whats green and tasty? Snot

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Cause KFC was chasing him.

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You know George Washington? He died.

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If it looks like chicken and tastes like chicken but Chuck Norris says it's beef, politely correct him. He is actually a very sensible fellow and will probably thank you for doing so.

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What is the difference between a pizza and ten dead babies? I dont have a pizza in my oven.

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A man walks up to a dead baby. The baby is dead

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Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

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Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances, one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends PS: the one above was wrong sorry :(

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How much does a fat penguin weigh? 45 kilograms.

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A snail walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey we don't serve snails here," and flicks him across the street. 3 years later the snails walks back into the bar and said, "why'd ya do that for??"

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How do you know when some one is a complete dick? When they hit the prestige buttom in Black Ops when your taking a dump. N.P.P.

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whats ironic about a white van being white the driver usualy is not

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woman's rights

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ASIAN- Look me in the eyes Normal human being- open them

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Life is like a bridge. You get walked on all your life until you fall apart.

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What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

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Why did the girl go over her texting limit? She had a hot boyfriend.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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