Knock Knock Who's There? Children Protective Services. Your kids are dead.

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Last night I had a lovely chicken burger I had no mayo left so had to make do with coleslaw but enjoyed it anyway.

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What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

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Q:how do you save a black guy from drowning A: you shoot him

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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

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Where do you find a dog with no legs ? Same place you left it ...

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Roses are red violets are blue im a mass murderer and i will kill your family with no hesitation

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Eight hours? Sigh, leave it to me then! We both know you are a sweetheart behind that thick skull of yours, I mean why would you ask if it bothers me then?

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One,two,skip a few... five,six,seven,eight...(and so on ad infinitum)

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So a horse walks into a barn.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks: "why that long face?" The horse, being a horse, thus not being able to comprehend the complexities of a conversation, says nothing and then shits on the floor.

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hear hear

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Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

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Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

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Why are all women bad drivers? All of them aren't.

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What happens to men who grow up. They are probably taller

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what is black and is a really bad neighbor. your bad neighbor wearing a black shirt.

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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So i can type anything in this box and it shows up on the website?

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What's black and doesn't work? My blackberry

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Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud…

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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