If life gives you lemons, squeeze it in life' s eyes.

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Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

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whats the difference between a male porsche driver and a porcupine? with porcupines,the pricks are on the outside.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You like penis, That's what you live up to.

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I like my women how I like my salad. Without a penis.

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Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

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A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

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heyy emit chase wazzup

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he didn't have arms.

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Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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What is bad about being black and Jewish? Your gonna have to sit in the back of the oven

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mikey is cute

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whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

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What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF! What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF HOLDING ITS BREATH!

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How heavy duty are your nachos? No, because babies simply cannot swallow blenders.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

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When life gives you gators, make Gatorade.

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What's big, grey and can't climb a tree? A parking lot

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for his birthday? Broken arms and legs

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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