A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!"

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So two cannibals are eating a clown. Cannibal one: Does this taste funny to you? Cannibal two: Considering that this man was a clown he must have been in poverty so he resulted to being an alcoholic and maybe over dosed on over the counter drugs. Cannibal one: Thank you for that reasonable answer.

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side

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A man walks into a bar. His alcoholism is destroying his family.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, the highest he placed was 4th.

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Why was the girl crying? She got shot in the penis

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What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

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Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

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why did sally fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock? who's there? not sally.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there Not Sarah

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What is the difference between Terri Schaivo and a basket of rotting vegetables? The rotting vegetables aren't edible.

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Q: What's worse than a worm in you're apple... A: The fact that you have all-timers and can't remember...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

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A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

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what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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If your waiting in a restaurant for a waiter, doesn't that make you a waiter? O.o

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An Asian walks into a bar and says, "1???????????"

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what did the man do when he fell off the top of a building? Nothing He DIED!!!!!!

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What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts What's worse than two holocausts? Twilight

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what is purple and fly? - a purple flying.

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jimmy carr walks into a tax office.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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