how do you kill a blonde with a pistol Put the clip in and shoot her

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

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What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

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A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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What's funny? Women's rights.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

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A black man walks out of a police station

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What is big and wet and smells like mushrooms? A big wet mushroom.

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Roses are red violets are blue next thing you know my D*** is in you

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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We are both missing the picture here friend, those bastards chose to fuck up my eye themselves, and while I do not completely trust you, (as far as I know you might still be a faggotqueer trying to mindfuck me), I trust you enough to take my chances. As for my eye, its fucked, I see light with it, and that is pretty much what I am going to keep seeing from it besides it looks like shit, on the bright side I look 20 percent more bad ass with an eye-patch than without, I am physically and mentally scarred, and as far as physically goes, I dig the look. Dont worry, you seem overly concerned about what people here are gonna think, it is ironic how the shitty system here makes it so easy to hide ones identity, you know if people do it right, know nothing about computers myself.

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True or fales? Eddie Izzard.

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Stevie Wonder valentine: Roses are black, Violets are black, everything is black, I cant see shit!

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What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

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Knock knock. Get out!!

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two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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