A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

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What made your girlfriend laugh to death? You dropped my pants.

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Every zoo is a petting zoo if you're not a pussy

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What's Terry short for? He's missing a leg.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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What's green and red? A frog in a blender

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

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Roses are red,I love the walking dead,but if they kill off Darrell ill watch glee instead

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A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

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Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Your mom My mom died three years ago, please go away while i cry.

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You wanna hear a joke? Me too

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What is the best joke ever? 1D

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

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An Oldish (probably 27) man walks into a chuck-e cheese, He then puts on his coustume.

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Why do gay guys like push pops? Because they are a delicious lollipop treat.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she was clumsy. Nevertheless the accident was minor and she did not injure the arms that she had.

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What's the difference between a black preist and a white priest? the color of their skin.

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- Why the black people smell? - To let even the blind person hate them.

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What did Canada say to America? We will not become apart of the United States where people are known as Fat Nascar lovin hicks!

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A Black Child just received his ivy-league diploma and hugged his dad.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Cause 7 is black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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