Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Slam! Slam! Slam! I'm a woodpecker. Slam! Slam! Slam! Except with dirt.

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Roses are red violets are blue... Only not really. Actually light is reflected off them and these colors show up soo....

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a man walks into the bar and say, OUCH!!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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An under aged girl walks into a bar. She couldn't have done so without a fake ID and early development.

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Uncle Eugene enjoyed to drive. Then he was killed in a car crash.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't want to.

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Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

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Q:What happens to an elephant if he falls from a building with 10 floors? A:He dies

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What is the difference between a duck?

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What did the african american ninja say to the jewish bartender? Can I have a beer?

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Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? having a worm sized penis.

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A pedophile walks into a daycare

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Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road It was being dragged to the other side by fox It's the way of life _._._

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tennis grunts . . . no different from sex noises

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and smashed his head on a jagged rock and screamed in anguish. Jill watched in horror as her brother suffered through the agonizing pain. Jack was rushed to the hospital immediately, but despite the doctors' efforts, he died. Jill mourned the loss of her brother for many years after the incident.

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what do you call a black guy on steroids? a black guy on steroids

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Why did Schrödinger's Cat cross the road? It didn't

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a car? It depends on how fast you drive.

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How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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