why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

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Where's my baby??

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What's funnier than a midget bungie jumping? Nothing

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knock, knock... no one replies and it becomes obvious that no one is in the house.

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You know what really grinds my gears? Shifting into "park" before my car's fully stopped.

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

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Not really a anti joke: Superman is flying over town when he suddenly spots a completely naked Spiderwoman moaning and all sweaty while rubbing her her legs, This gets Superman really h0rny but does not want to get caught, so he flies down and bangs away so fast nobody notices a thing a thing and leaves. Spiderwoman: Hey honey whats wrong? Please come lie on top of me again! Invisible Man: AAAAAAARGH!!! IT FEELS LIKE I HAVE A DAMN BOWLING BALL UP MY ASS HOLE!!!

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What's not red? No tomatoes.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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there is a black guy riding a bicycle. he is extremely skilled on it and says he has never fallen off.

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why did bob fall off the swing Because he got hit by a microwave

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Nobody cares maddie!

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What does a blonde's pussy taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage.

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Adam Thomas is homosexual

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Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made the man who said shut up mad so he told the man to shut up.

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69

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A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, 32!

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why is the room so dark? because the light is not on.

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a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

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How do you stop a black kid from bouncing on the bed? Put Velcro on the cealing.

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What's round, has two hands, and tells time? Some fat guy I know, with a watch.

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"Hello, is this the Krusty Krab?" "No, this is Patrick."

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I like my coffee the way I like Christina Aguilera - I don't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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