What did the father give to his son with terminal cancer for his 5th birthday? Nothing the kids going to die anyway

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Bro my d*ck is like 20 inches. That's not healthy, an erection that big will deprive your brain of too much blood and kill you

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42

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Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

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How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?. . . . . . No! You open the door, TAKE THE GIRAFFE OUT, and put the elephant in. So, the lion calls a meating in the animal kingdom and who's not there? The elephant, he's in the refrigerator. You have to cross a river infested with crocodiles, and you don't have a boat. How do you get across?. . . . . . No! You get in the river and swim across because the crocodiles are at the meating with the lion!

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whats worse than getting the girl you're talking to taken from you? getting the girl you like taken from you.. by a asian.

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i like going to public parks and watching the kids run and yell because they dont know im using blanks

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What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

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Nope, but yeah Felix looks a lot like Mickey Mouse, I think, nah it was Oswald the Lucky rabbit I believe, and he used to get his ass kicked by... Damn, what`s the name of the fat cat that beat up Mickey in steamboat willie?

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Don't you sometime just want to chop of your toes and stomp around to prove to the so called 'experts' that it is possible for a person to walk without toes? . . . . . . me neither

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What did the young boy get His dad for fathers day? Nothing, his dad died from a very aggresive cancer

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Roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme fridge

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Cassidy's a whore so open the door.

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why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

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What do you call a black man that nicks your car? All we can say is that he is called the Nig

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Q: Why did Robin Williams kill himself? A: Because he was jealous of all the attention that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was getting.

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Q. Why was the little boy sad? A. He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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what's 9+10? 19, not 21

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What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

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what do trees like to drink? r o o t b e a r

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What do you get when you put a cat in a Xerox machine? A copycat.

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!

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What do you call a kid on crutches? Crippled

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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