How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

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What do a woman and a puzzle have in common? Both couldn't vote before 1920... the puzzles still can't vote

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Why did the man have an extremely large nose? It just so happens that both his father and mother had large noses as well and nature took it's course.

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what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

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What was the pirates favorite letter? Q.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, and mute child get for his birthday? Nothing, his parents hate him.

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What's black,white, and red all over? Nothing, because if it is completely covered in red then it can only be red.

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i like tits

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you know whats funny... nothing.

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what did the homeless man get for christmas? nothing.

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An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Mexican and an American are on a plane. It crashes due to an oversight concerning its weight limit, killing all of its passengers.

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They say you are what you eat, but i don't remember eating a big bowl of sexy.

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A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

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Manchester City

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Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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Why was the dentist sent to jail? Because he committed a crime.

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What's black and hangs from trees? tires ...and black people

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

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i dont like attention whores lol

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What is white and square? A ping pong block

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Civil Rights.

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:(Sneeze) :Bless You :Thank You! :Mention it :Thank You!

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting constantly tortured for hours non-stop by getting your eyebrows plucked out one by one and getting your teeth pulled out and getting your arms cut open by a razor and getting your nose twisted off and getting your nipples ripped off by a pair of pliers and getting your toenails scraped off by a knife and getting a needle shoved into your eyes and getting a sword stuffed up your arse and getting your penis split in two like a hotdog and getting your balls smashed up by a sledgehammer so the sperm inside goes everywhere. I think that would be worse than dropping a dollar down the drain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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