Knock, knock. Who's there? I am.

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You're so ugly, When you look in the mirror it displays you're reflection because that is what mirrors do

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Today I was reading anti jokes. At first I didn't get it, but then I figured it out and...ah crap, why am I writing this, it's just going to get thumbed down...

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Opinions are like assholes... ...they're both nouns.

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Why are people racist? Thats a good question

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Two farmers are standing in a field. One says: "It's a bit cold today, don't you think?" The other doesn't reply, because he is trying to work out how to tell the first farmer that his son has just been killed in a road accident.

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There are 500 bricks on an airplane. If you drop one out, how many are left? 499. There are three steps to putting an elephant in a refrigerator. What are they? Open the fridge, put the elephant in, close the fridge. There are four steps to putting a deer in the fridge. What are they? Open the fridge, take the elephant out, put the deer in, close the fridge. The Lion King is having a birthday party. All the animals are there but one. Why is that? The deer is in the fridge. A woman wants to cross an alligator infested swamp. How does she do it? She crosses normally because the alligators are at the Lion King's party. She dies anyways. Why? She gets hit in the head with a brick.

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Why did the baby stop crying? Because he stopped breathing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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Q:Whats worse then hard nipples A:The holocaust

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A duck walks into a bar and is quickly shooed away because it is unsanitary to have a duck in a bar.

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A guy walks into a bar. After only 10 minutes, he leaves. The bar closes in 10 minutes.

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A man runs over a woman...... Who's fault is it? The man's. He shouldn't be driving in the kitchen.

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a blond is walking down a dark allie,.... she is raped and killed by the following morning.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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What is the difference between the Xbox, PS3, and the Wii? The Wii is a complete waste of money.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Obviously way more than is considered acceptable or safe, considering his recent public outbursts and problems with addiction.

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who wins a race a white guy or a black guy? depends who's faster

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A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

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FOOL TOP COMMENT IS MINE!

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Three minorities walk into a bar and are treated poorly

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8=>

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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