Four Iraqis played hide and seek 17 years ago, one of them missing, why? he's still hiding.

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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What did the martian say to the other martian when he saw a fire hydrant? "Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!"

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What's funny? Women's rights.

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Why did Santa die? Because he got diabetes from so many cookies

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A person with OCD walked into a abr.

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Q: How many ghetto people does it take to carry a fat gorilla? A: 14

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can you touch your toes? no

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what did the robot say to the centipede. Stop being a centipede!!!! Its funny because robots have arms.

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What's worse than finding a work in your apple? The Holocaust.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? None, you don't have to be jewish to change a light bulb

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hi

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

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Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period. Damnit, ignore that.

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There was a girl who was allergic to peanuts she ate peanuts and died the next day. She got hit by a bus.

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A priest a rabbi and the dalai lama walk into a bar. They decided to order the hotwings...... Why do u care??? : )

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll you have?" and the duck says "Quack". The bartender is then promptly fired and committed to the nearest mental institution for thinking that ducks can talk and order beer.

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What do you call a barn full of black people? antique farm equipment.

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So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

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What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a woman? Two people of the opposite gender having sex.

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A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots the bartender.

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A dyslexic agnostic insomniac stays up at night wondering if there's a dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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