Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? I am.

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amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

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hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

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What if algebra teachers were actually pirates, and they're making us find the X so they can search for buried treasure?

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Why was the kid late for his dentist appointment? He was abducted and he's been missing for thirteen days

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why did the Jew not attend school ? because he was 27

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Why did the kid hide under the table? There was an earthquake.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says "Is it hot in here?" The other muffin says "Yes. It feels like 425 degrees."

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I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

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What did Superman get for Christmas. Nothing as he likes to stay detached from society.

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Why is there so much hate in the world? Because you touch yourself at night.

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A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse. The horse walks out of the bar kicking over some chairs and scaring some people because he is a horse and horses do not belong in public atmospheres.

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What did Hitler get for Christmas? Some shoelaces for his shoes so he could tie his little knotsies.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He had no legs

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Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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A Jewish man walks into an ice-cream shop. Using the money he ha eared from his full time job, he orders a chocolate ice-cream in a waffle cone.

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A women in the kitchen.

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Woman: do u want to watch Snakes on a Plane? Man: sure, what is it about? Woman: It's about a horse on a boat

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How many penguins does it take to cover a dog house? Purple, because the Ice cream has no bones.

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your mother is so fat that she bought a treadmill and uses it daily. she already lost 20 lbs.

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What is the different between a blonde and a rock? nothing.

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What did the blind boy get for christmas? harry potter transcribed in braille so he could enjoy such a magical world like the rest of us

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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