What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

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Yo mama is so skinny, when she sits around the house, she sits comfortably in every chair. - Stephen Colbert

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Why did the man say how was your day? because it was the end of the day

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Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

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What's worse than having no coffee at the office? Looking out the window on the 100th floor and seeing the cockpit of a Boeing 767.

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Penis penis poop butt

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How many babies can you fit in a blender? None, the blender is too small. Also it is illegal to kill a baby infant because they are considered human. You can get life in prison or the death penalty for committing such a heinous crime.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Gastapo

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did you hear about the two peanuts walking down the street? one was raped.

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Why did Martin have to retake his exams? Because Martin is a right royal Dumbass.

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Why do people where saggy pants that don't fit? They can't afford too buy new

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Why don't chickens where pants? Cause they're animals,duh.

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What's green and has wheels? A green car.

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Question: What did one lesbian say to the other lesbian at the grocery store? Answer: Will that be paper or plastic?

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Yo mamas so fat, that I need a new pair of sunglasses.

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Reminding you of your religion. The army led by God attacked their foes at the mountains, yet had to flee because the enemy had plated steel wagons. Moral: Either God cant beat steel, or he was not there at all, its your call gents, because reading Ave Maria 50 times each time you sin, without reading the whole thing, does not even make you a Christian you FUCK (yes I can curse, you cannot)

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I farted!!!!! t'was smelly??????? I LIKE CRABS! #tomato problems

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

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teacher: what do you call a math book with no writing in it?! student: idk what? teacher: a notebook! student: ok... thanks

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

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Why did a man get arrested in a bar He was covered in bombs and charged with terrorism

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What did the pregnant teenager get for her birthday? An abortion.

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whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

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Why couldn't the black kid buy a bike? He had no money.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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