A drunk man is that last one inside a very popular bar. He passed out on the counter before he ordered a drink. The bartender is angry at a sale lost, which would have been his millionth sale before closing time on the 1000th day of business. He goes home and hangs himself.

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

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Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

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Why did Kelliintheraw get punched in the face? Because she is a dumbass

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

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how many babies does it take to paint a house? that is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

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I really don't like Holocaust jokes. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off of a guard tower.

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What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus isn't real. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid? I'm talking to him!"

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What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

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Why did Susie fall off of the swing? She was hit by an asteroid.

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THEN WHO WAS FONE?

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Q: What is the likely outcome of anyone who watches 'WWE'? A: They will lose their virginity to a hooker.

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Why couldn't the girl swing on the swing set? She had no arms.

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Your Black, Im Black, We're all Black

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Knock knock Come in

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what do mexicans enjoy eating? food.

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

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Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

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What do you call a gay dinosaur? Nothing, they're extinct.

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Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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a boy with asperges asked me a question today he asked me again and again because he has asperges

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What did Abraham Lincoln say to his slaves? Nothing, Abraham Lincoln had no slaves.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have cancer."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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