Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue These are your Results You have Cancer

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Q: How do you make sweet sexy love to cow and make her come several times and then have her lick your stick clean without nobody ever finding out? While secretly keeping her as your girlfriend forever? A: Wouldn't you like to know...

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A man walks into a bar. The force of the impact causes serious head trauma and kills him within a matter of minutes.

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How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? she had no arms of legs. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally.

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What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

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friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

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Don`t be mean? WOMAN! DO YOU NOT HOW TERRIBLE THE DEMAND YOU MAKE IS? ...Fine alright, I wont leave you hanging then... So I wont call. Moral: "Seriously though, I am leaving too, but I want the top comment"

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "What'll it be?" The horse never replied.

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What's cold, limp, approximately 65 pounds, and being dragged out of that pool with no safety fence over there? Not important, lets go get some Wendy's man.

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Ask me if you can see my dinosaur. Can I see your dinosaur? No dinosaurs don't exist sillyhead!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i know where you live now I'm coming for you

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

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What do an airplane and a strawberry have in common? They can both fly.... Except for the strawberry

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You`re honor, he fell off the staircase, I demand that staircase ends up in jail! Case closed.

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Why was Martha put in a wheelchair? She was hit by a rabid cabbage.

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what did the pizza say to the bread? nothing pizza cant talk

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How much dirt was in a hole that was 6 feet wide and 6 feet deep? None. It's a hole.

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Hey do you know who is in the yard? Not the boys, they all died in a horrific fire last Christmas.

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A man walked into the woods with alzheimers......pancakes

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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Q. What do you call a black priest? A. Holy Shit

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How do you drown a blond? Keep her head underwater until her lungs fill with water and her bodily functions stop working.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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