Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

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What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

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Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

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Nobody enjoys your company. Nobody likes your work. Nobody loves you. There is no person who's name is legitimately nobody.

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Im cute hehehee

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Dr. Fishbourne Dr. Fishbourne? Yea, I've come to inform you that your son has committed suicide due to lack of parental care and love.

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what happens when a girl poops? she wipes her butt.

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How do you get a woman out of a car? You drive it into a river and her body will float to the top.

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What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? I don't know, dinosaurs have been extinct for 200 million years.

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what did the lion say to the zebra? roar!

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What do you call a Mexican on a boat? A sailor

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A mother is sitting with her son at the park. A nearby man suddenly breaks into uncontrollable coughing. The mother leans over to her son and whispers, 'Smoker's cough.' The son never takes up smoking.

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Roses are Red, uh..uh..ahhhhh oh shit I just came that curse is true

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So a man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest of this joke, but your mom is a whore.

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Why did the Mexican put away the Marijuana? Because he was a Police Officer

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How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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How do you scare a black man? You dont

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Boy: Hey girl, the voices in my head tole me to come over and talk to you. Girl: ... *walks away*

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? Jews are people

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

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A man walked into a bar and was then taken away in an ambulance dude to a severe concussion.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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What's worse than dying? Dying twice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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