Roses are green Violets are grey Tulips are a lighter grey I am colorblind.

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What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

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A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

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What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

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Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

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What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

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why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

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A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because her dad pushed her too hard -Knock knock -Who's there? -Suzie, I'm dead now with a knife through my neck and I'm ready to kill you since you didn't forward that chain letter, now hold still so I can chop off your toes one by one and peel your skin off then leave a bloody mess for your parents -k

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

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Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

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What happen when the man preposed to his girlfriend? He regretted for the rest or his life.

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whats green and lives in the water

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What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

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your mom is so poor that now your family is at risk of losing there home

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A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

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Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing, she had no arms. Knock Knock Who’s there? Not Sarah.

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How do you stop an asshole from being an asshole toward you? Shoot him in the head.

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Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

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Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

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What did the American say to the Russian? Hello, but the Russian did not understand

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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