What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

What do you call a black person riding a bicycle? A black person riding a bicycle.

Where can I apply for janitor school?

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "Where's my tractor?"

How do you stop a rhino from charging? An ak-47

*Knock knock* I thought no one was home so I left... Turns out my grandma hung herself

One day a man was out fishing in the lake. Suddenly, there was a huge fish pulling his fishing pole so hard it almost broke. Luckily, he managed to pull the fish into his boat. It was the biggest fish he had ever caught and he brought it home for his family to see. They were all very proud.

There once was a man from Nantucket But then he moved to Boston and changes his name to "man from Boston"

Your mother gets so hungry, she eats.

What do you get when lettuce and oranges come together? I dont know, thats why I asked you.

What do fish and shoe laces have in common? nothing.

What's big and messy? A big mess

Good afternoon.

What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

What's the difference between a dead baby and an apple? I don't cum on an apple before I eat it.

Why didn't the [any object] catch on fire? Because there was water on it. Why didn't the [other object] catch on fire? Because there was water on it. [repeat ad infinitum]

Why do alcoholics use brown bags? Because they are ashamed of what they have become and seek to repress their guilt by entering into denial.

Remember those days where we planned what to do with our lives instead of wondering what things lied ahead? Those where the days, it does not matter if we are relics, heroes, or villains today. Back then, we did not seek to discover our future, we sought to create it, back then our people did not pray for a better day, but worked for it. And love and kindness was not something only found in heaven, but what we shared in what was the closest thing, to heaven on earth. Tell me the truth, are there many like us left in this world?

Whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings,whats worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust?.. 3 bee stings

A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

did you hear about the man who crossed the road? he made it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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