What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

Billy: Hey Timmy, you're so fat your high school picture was an aerial photograph Timmy: Oh yeah? Well you're so fat when you tried to take that photograph the helicopter pilot told you to get out because you're too fat

You know what's lame? A person who can't walk.

What did the waitress do when the man asked for pizza? She ran away

im a policeman the car infront of me had a foot hanging out of the trunk. i pulled him over. i closed the trunk and proceeded to inform him of the dangers of open trunks.

What's the difference between a pile of bricks and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of bricks in my basement.

A man walked into a metal bar, they were playing Metallica.

A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

how do you get the high score on doodle jump? jump from platform to platform without falling or being attcked by various monsters.

How do you blind a Chinese man You put a blind fold on him

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you simply have a chicken joke WITHOUT it crossing the road

Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

peter charastabopouloulous

BILLY BOB JAM:KNOCK KNOCK!! BOBERT:WHAT!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WOULD I EVEN CARE?!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WONT YOU SHUT UP BILLY BOB JAM ORLANDIO STEAK?!!?!?!GET ME OUTTA HERE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Why can't Tom go horse back riding? He is paralized from the neck down

Why was the dog crying? Because his owners hated him and called him stupid.

Why did the girl fall off her bike? she got a fridge thrown at her

Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

am i invited to party? no

What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

What did the monster under the bed say to another monster? I have the odd feeling that someone is on top of the bed.........

Cavan keely's the type of guy who drives past hilltown screaming GET IT THE VAN!!

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...