Q. What did the man say when his car broke down. A. Damn it, my car broke down.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Except when I said muffins I meant Jews. .. I guess it really isn't that funny anymore.

how many jews can you fit into a car 5, two in the front three in the back

Ludwig van Beethoven, John Coltrane, John Lennon, and Justin Bieber are out for lunch at a taco stand. The owner calls the police, and Justin Bieber is arrested for digging up corpses.

How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

Yo momma so fat, she's dead.

Knock, Knock Who's there? The IRS, you're being audited.

Hi is the longest two letter word in the world

What has four legs, but cannot walk? A giraffe with polio.

Knock Knock Who's there? I eat mop I eat mop who? That's strange, most American's don't eat poo I'm Asian

What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

A Jew,Spiderman and The Incredible Hulk all jump off the top of the Empire State Building,who hits the ground first? The Jew because the other two dont exist

Arrow to the Knee

haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

What did the girl say when she was hit by a train? Nothing she exploded on impact

a man walks in to a bar. he says oww.

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was an object of great appeal to him on the other side.

Whats worse than getting raped by a monkey The fact that you actually got raped by a monkey

Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to get to the other side.

Why did the Armadyl godsword penetrated full Bandos? Because the AGS went up its tassets

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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