What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

Have you heard the one about the three tailed salamander that fell off a bridge? I haven't either.

What did the prostitute get after sex? Syphilis... she got syphilis

Q: What did one muffin say to the other muffin? A: "AAAA! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

Yo Aodhan yer hands smell of pish

there are 2 muffins in an oven one says "man its hot in here" the other says "shut up i hate this joke"

If you pull a pin out of a grenade, is it possible to put it back? I need a quick answer for this question.

What do you get when you put your dick in a potato? A guy who is into creepy sex

What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

The american education system.

A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

What's the difference between an egg and a Llama? The'yre both not lamps.

knock knock who's there me me who It's me your son who was in prison for 6 years for false charges of attempted homicide

I was in the 74th hunger games I hid in the cornucopia until almost everyone was dead. Then I saw Katniss and Peeta so while they were distracted with night lock I pulled a rubber chicken out of my ass and beat the shit out of them till they died then I won the 75th hunger game also. They asked me to be there mocking jay but I killed them all and blew the plane up in the Capitol the end. By Adam Chebali

What did the blind, deaf rabbit get for Easter? . . . Eaten by a by a lion.

this is not an anti joke

What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? Nothing at all, except the WNBA is professional basketball players of the female sex.

There was a black and a mexican man in a car. Who was driving? None of them; it was the police driving.

Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

What's green and would kill you if it fell on you? A golf course

Godzilla steps on a bar and orders a Scotch.

How do you keep an idiot in suspense?....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...