Why did the man cross the street? Because no cars were coming and he wanted to get to the othher side

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What did Little Johny get for Christmas?

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A kid falls off a cliff and dies. Who cleans them up? A bear.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock, knock Who's there? Not Susie

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What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Why was the child lying in the scrap yard? because he was being torn apart by guard dogs.

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What do you do when life throws lemons at you? Take out your lemon shield and retreat deep into your lemon proof bunker.

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An American man walks to Mc Donalds.

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Darth Vader: Luke, I am your father! Luke: You're not my dad!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHA PENIS

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A man walks in to a bar, what does he say? Ouch.

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Yor Mama is soooooooooooo fat, when she looked in da mirror... it cracked.

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WARNING!: THIS JOKE MAY BE OFFENSIVE::: three mexicans wanted to cross the united states borders when they were greeted by a border guard with a gun. the guard tells the three mexicans that if they wanted to pass the border, they will have to do as he says, to which the 3 of them agrees. the guard tells them to go gather a pair of fruits, so like that each of them went their own way to go get some fruits. the first mexican came back with a pair of apples. The guard orders him to stick both of them up his ass and if he makes a sound, the guard will kill him. The mexican obeys and sticks the apple halfway when he screamed. the guard killed him. The second mexican came back with a pair of cherries. The guard ordered the same thing and told him the same thing. the second mexican made 1 cherry and a half when he giggled. So he died also. when he got to heaven, he meets the first mexican. to which the 1st mexican asks, "why did you laugh? that was so easy!" and the 2nd mexican responded, "i giggled because i saw the third mexican coming with a pair of water melons."

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Cashier: Have a nice day sir! Grumpy man: Don't tell me what kind of day to have ya fruit!

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How many people like gang rape? 9 out of 10

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Extra extra read all about it dunkin donuts has now been named dunkin pigs..a cops favorite hang out.

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How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

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Why do dogs lick their balls? Why? Because they can.

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An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

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how do you make an idiot laugh? tell him a joke from antijoke

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I am just trying to grasp the terms you use Nero, you are a genius, I mean I always heard about it, but honestly, well, my first impression of you here was... Different.

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guy walks into a bar, ouch

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Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

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Your momma's so ugly, she has endure self-esteem issues relating to her appearance that have plagued her since grade school.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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