If you play a Justin Bieber album backwards, I swear you can hear satanic messages... but even worse, if you play it forward, you hear Justin Bieber.

Why did the plane crash? Because there was no pilot

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

There was a farmer had a dog and Bingo was his name-oh But the farmer killed and ate him, because Bingo licked himself inappropriately

Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

Your mamas so stupid, her IQ is lower than the average person of her age group.

What happens if you roll a nickel down a street in Mexico? It eventually stops and lands on its side.

what do a carrot and an elephant have in common? theyre both orange except for the elephant.

Win industrial estate, Newry

What did the train say at the party Thomas isn't really dumb ass

Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

Did you hear about the little girl who got a bike for her birthday? Shes dying of Terminal Cancer

why did the cookie go to the docter he felt crumpie

Roses are red, violets are blue, I am a bitch, and so are you!

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Ok good, just checking. It would be a shame for your perishable foodstuffs to go bad.

there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

what does a squid and a worm have in commen they both are animals

If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Why was the chicken sad because it lost it's family

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Q. Why did Justin Beiber fall off the ladder? A. He was trying to reach puberty

Why did the handicap man scream for help? Because he fell out of his wheel chair

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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