What did the Queen of England say when here servant died? Another one bites the dust!

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roses are red violets are blue my cat died and i have alsheimers who are you

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A bunch of teens were egging the house of their science teacher for giving them homework over break. They got caught by their teacher's ex-husband and he told them, "She broke up with me for telling her she was being too hard on her students. So, my friends, egg on!!!!!"

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What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

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What is blue and angry? Mr Johnston wearing his green dress. I'm colour blind but he came round to my way of thinking in the end.

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How many Pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1. and "pollack" is a derogatory term that could be fond offensive to some people.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your whole family is dead And now it's time for you!

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You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

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A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Why the long face?" Unable to under stand English the horse shits on the floor and leaves

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Why was Sally crying? Because she had a frog stapled to her face.

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane 911

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Moby Stick, the Great White Twig

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo

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How do you make a Nazi mad? You slash his tires.

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What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

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Why did i write this? I was bored

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What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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What's a good way to kill time? It's impossible to kill an inanimate object.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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So this Horse walked into a bar... Just kidding, it was Sarah Jessica Parker.

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What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

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what do you call a man with no arms no legs cancer and down syndrome? you call him stephen because his name is stephen

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Why did the clown go to jail? For 23 charges of rape and murder.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops