What do you call a fish with no eyes? a genetically disfigured fish please stop pollution.

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Q: What do you call a man driving a van with a bunch of stuff in the back that doesn't belong to him? A: A delivery man

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

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Gauss what ur mama said last night nothing i found her dead

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24

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Whats worst than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worst than a pile of dead babies? One live baby under the pile of dead babies.

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have mental problems Doobah haga Blakatrabbit

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i was gunna write a joke..but i took an arrow to me knee.

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someone says they've been "dying laughing"... no they haven't; they're quite capable of still breathing and functioning in every day life.

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why were maddie and maddy and rachel and jill all friends? we all enjoy pizza

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When life gives you lemons, thank life for its generosity.

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is the glass of milk half empty or half full it is scientifically proven that these are the same thing. Choosing one over the other is like saying that 1/2 does not equal 1-1/2. A normal person would just see this as an ordinary glass of milk.

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Q: What does the fox say? A: Nothing. Foxes cannot talk.

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Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

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When Santa got stuck up the chimney he began to shout.. But he didn't shout for long as he soon succumbed to the toxic smoke and died of carbon monoxide poisoning

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how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

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When life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians.

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what is the diference between my left tit and my right tit .... my right one was cut off because of breast cancer

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Konock Konock Uh, you spelt knock knock wrong... Oh.

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Q: How many banana peels does it take to run down the street, true or false? A: Telephone poles don't have doors.

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a guy jumped out of a plane...he died

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What is a life without options.... an optionless life

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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