What's the diffrents beetween a carrot and a dead baby? One I like to eat in my soup, the other one s a carrot.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's 2+2? It's certainly not 1.

thumb_up thumb_down -112

How did the little boy fall over? He was tripped up by his alcoholic father.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Where did Susie go when the bomb went of? Everywhere?

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one. It should only take one person to demonstrate such a simple task, regardless of their hair color.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

ati jokes are not to be funny. what about u

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the border? Because he was an immigrant and was afraid of the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a cat that gets pushed into the pool? Angry as hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, I have amnesia.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call girls that can run faster than me? Virgins

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is the difference between a lion and a tiger? A lion ,on average, weighs 31 kilograms more.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Nobody know he couldn't open it.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: What did the blonde woman say? A: My hair is blonde

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Guess what? AIDS!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

So there is two clowns. Pickle and Jim. If you were asked who was funnier, you would probably say pickle. Well you would be wrong. It's Jim.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Tip for Employers: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the resumes into the bin.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red Violets are blue I am staraiL so dont touch me!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops