Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whose. There? Not Susie.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet. You guys really suck at making poems...

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The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

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What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

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What did the old Hispanic man say to the young black woman in the Laundromat? I don't know cause I goofed in school and didn't pay attention in spanish class.

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How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

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Why did the sheriff cross the road? Cuz I told him to.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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What do Asians eat for dinner? Home cooked meals

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if she is old enough to bleed, she probably wears tampons.

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Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

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A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

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What did the doctor tell his patient? Unfortunately you have cancer.

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Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

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What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? Nothing, fishes don't speak, and due to their short memory he's probably forgotten about the event already, although he may have a pretty bad headache

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What has human male genitalia? A human male

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How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

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a man walks into a bar the other man ducks

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whats white and big and white? alot of things...

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What is wrong with this phrase? The next line is false. The first line is true. Answer: llamas

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Decode this; Hetay owcay aidsay oomay. Answer: ummmmm.... Let me think....ummm, does anybody speak pig latin?

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Why did the man loose his balls? he had testicular cancer and had to get them removed.

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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