What's green, brown, red, and is covered with crumbs in a ditch on the side of the road? A girl-scout who got hit by a car...

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What is black and blue and red all over? A woman that just learned a valuable lesson.

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Your mom is such a slut that she has herpes.

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Where do five gay guys walk? Where ever they want to. This is a free country, where people are free to travel as the please, no matter what their sexual orientation may be

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A jew go out of a bar

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why did the clown fall off the swing because he got shot in the face

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Womens rights.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Your time.

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Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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This is my firstever post so I wanted to make it very specialand have it really mean something, then I though fark that for a joke

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Q: what do you call a muslim driving a plane? I don't know A: 9/11

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves the bar slightly intoxicated.

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What's long, hard, and full of seamen? An ejaculating penis.

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Why a blonde woman eat vegetables? Because she is a vegetarian.

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Religion

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what do you call a black guy on steroids? a black guy on steroids

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have difficulty understanding each other.

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What did the black man in a white 2007 Jeep Wrangler when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

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Whats the most impotent thing to remember when your going skateboarding? A skateboard.

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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