How do you get the neighborhood hoodlums to stop pushing you over in your wheelchair? Brutally murder their families in front of them.

What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

Why doed Dorris suffer from incontinence? A weiner dog punctured her bladder.

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: a pizza is a food that was created in italy and is regularly eaten daily around the world and a jew is a religion that is constantly criticized and made fun of because they are different.

How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

What's the difference between Stevie Wonder and Kevin Bacon? There's none. Neither of them is a taxi driver.

Why did the aeroplane fall out of the sky? An ant jumped on it

q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

What do call a spoon that doesn't work? Broken.

hey i just met you and this is crazy so heres my number actually is dolan

How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

how do you stop a gang of black people from raping a white woman? throw a basketball

What's the difference between and black dick and a white dick? To get to the other side

Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I am a dog

why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

why did the chicken cross the rode?????? i dont know because he felt like it???????????p.s.i actually dont know why he crossed the rode so go ask the next who makes a joke about a chicken crossing a rode?

Why are mexicans such hard workers? I don't know.

what is more annoying than finding a worm in your apple? An asian kid with ADHD.

"Guess what I was doing in my room last night with the door closed with my hand?" "Please don't say what I think you're going to say" "What? I was just cleaning my room."

whats the differnce between a corvette and a pile of dead babies??? i dont have a corvette in my garage.

Why didn't my marriage work out? Because I married a tangerine.

Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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