How do you stop a bus? Put the brakes on.

your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

You know your in deep shit when you hit somebody in the head with a 2 by 4 and they dont go down.

Why did Charlie eat a baked potato? Because he was hungry.

Two guys are walking down the street. One asks the other "Nice weather today, huh?" And the other responds "It sure is," and they both continue on with their days.

Why is Osama bin laden so hard to find? Because he is dead.

A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the black men.

whats white and sticky glue

Q: What do you get when you cross a rare breed of penguin with a horse. A: Well to be fair, turtles have shells

What's worse than getting a divorce? Nuclear warfare

what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

What's the difference from an muslim and a christian blonde Religion

There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "It sure is hot in here." The other muffin says "Holy shit a talking muffin

What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

Why did the house burn down? Obama

What the diffrence between a jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. So now he's dead. No more eating of shoes.

Why did the downtown New York worker never make it home? An airplane crashed into his office.

Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

There are 3 types of people in this world, those who can count to potato and those who can't.

How many dead kids can you fit into a plastic bag in your trunk? Ask Kasey Anthony

Q. Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A. Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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