why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

What did the robber take from the store? The managers dick

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

Your mother is so average in weight and in attractiveness.

How do you say "Hello" in India? 1. Get a plane ticket and fly to India 2. Say Hello in India

Knock Knock. Who's there? Sorry wrong door.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms Why did Susie drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere Knock Knock "Whos There?" Not Susie

A woman walks up to a man in a supermarket and asks him where she can find the potatos. He says "I think they are all the way at the end on aisle 3" "Thanks" she says. Then she gets to aisle 3, and there aint no potatos!!!!

Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

Man 1: Not to be gay or anything, but I really like your shirt, it looks nice on you. Man 2: Not to be gay or anything, but I like men.

You tell me. I have amnesia.

What does a nun and a hat have in common? Size

Yo momma's so dumb, she's not smart.

What did pinocchio want to become? Hepatitus free.

Jake likes to have tickle parties with McCauley Culkin.

I know animal testing is cruel, but my dog did really well on the SATs.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Who gives a shit

How do you kill a vampire? Because vampires are figments of society's imagination and actuall living creatures, this task is impossible.

Q:What does a virgin and a penny both have in common? A:Guys don't want them.

What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

what's the difference between a chicken and a grape? They're both purple........ except for the chicken

Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

zebras

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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