What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck, if a wood chuck could chuck oak? Well, If an oatmeal man could oat chuck oat, then a wood oat chucker could chuck oats.

Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

What do you call two homosexuals in fancy hats? It depends, you have to ask their names first.

Whats9+10 19

3 men walk into a bar, and the fourth guy behind them had the sense to duck under it.

they sent me too your moms house and 9 months later you are here

What is blue and flies across the room? A baby with a punctured lung.

Why did Sarah fall off the swings? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

What's worse than getting in a car accident? Being turned into dust and swarmed by bees while on fire

Why was the human stronger than the dog? Because the dog had four legs and a mouth and a human has 2 legs, 2 arms, and is taller. Therefore, the human has more capabilites than the dog.

Why did John stay home from school? He died.

How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? None. Babies shouldn't be changing light bulbs.

Girl:Do you wanna hear a joke? Boy:Sure... Girl: jesus loves you

If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

How many monkeys can play COD at once? It depends on how many controllers you have.

Boob

Q:what do you call a black man with blonde hair flying a plane? A: A pilot

Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

Why did the baby fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms.

There was an Englishman, an Irishman and a chest of drawers. The Englishman put a flask of coffee in the top drawer without even looking. Diane hates wrestling.

what did the policeman say to an armed robber? you can go, as long as you don't hurt my doughnuts

What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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