What do you call a black Arnold Schwarzenegger? Arnold Schwarzenegger.

The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

Q:Why are all of the vampires extinct? A:AIDS is a serious disease. You shouldn't joke about it.

Why did the kid poo his pants? Because he was Matt Daly

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

This joke is the worst joke ever.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

Why did the pirate have a peg leg? Diabetes

what do the students call their red-headed friend? Mike.

A man told his wife to go make him a sandwich. She said no.

How do you kill a blond wearing a hat? Shoot her in the face.

Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

why didn't the chicken cross the road. Because it was hit by a truck.

But officer, I did come to a full stop!

What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

What do you can an astronaut with an apple? Never mind, I have a boner.

Guest what in the butt

Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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