why did sally fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock? who's there? not sally.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there Not Sarah

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What is the difference between Terri Schaivo and a basket of rotting vegetables? The rotting vegetables aren't edible.

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Q: What's worse than a worm in you're apple... A: The fact that you have all-timers and can't remember...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

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A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

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what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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If your waiting in a restaurant for a waiter, doesn't that make you a waiter? O.o

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An Asian walks into a bar and says, "1???????????"

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what did the man do when he fell off the top of a building? Nothing He DIED!!!!!!

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What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts What's worse than two holocausts? Twilight

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what is purple and fly? - a purple flying.

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jimmy carr walks into a tax office.

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A man walked on the street where he saw an other man. The two men said: "Hi!" to each other and walked together down the road. Then one of the men got ran over by a car. The other man said: "ROFL".

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What do u do to blow off steam? I simply go to the top of the empire states building, poor gasoline in a bag, put a baby in it, light it on fire, and through it off the side. problem?

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What's blue and smells like red paint? That blue guy from Megamind.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Pussy... Do you get it? Think about what you just answered.

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What's the difference between a plumber and a husband? Both fuck the same women when the other is away.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

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Whats bigger than 'burger king'? A. burger

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A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

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How do you stop your baby from crawling into your room? Shove a spear through its head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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