What starts with P and ends with ORN? POPCORN

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

Knock knock! Whos there? Me. Now open the door.

What's better then petting a lion? Petting a lion and not getting eaten

I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

Roses are Blue Violets are Red Watermelons are green Refridgerator

Knock, Knock Come in

If a chicken and a taco cross a highway how many cats does it take to milk a turkey? Cactus cause the dog had two black eyes

Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

Whats worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

Q: What did the bartender say to the Arab as he was walking in? A: Nothing, the bomb had already killed them both.

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What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.

Dyslexics are teople poo

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

A Boy went up to his dad and told him he was hungry. His dad then beat him to death.

Dat ass, or dem titties? Your choice.

A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

why do leprecon's laugh when they run through the grass? because it tickel's their balls

Peter was sitting on a bench. He had a bag of 10 sweets and was eating them slowly. John and Anthony both wanted some, but Peter wanted to still have sweets left over. How many did he give them both? None. He's that selfish.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

What do you call a black man sitting on a porch? Relaxed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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