Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has has no arms.

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Why didn't the cat eat its dinner? Because I nailed its head to the floor.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

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Who is JP? A really smart kid! HAHA jk

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on its sex. Females weigh 150-250kg, and males weigh upwards of 350kg.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

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Guess what. I eat weed and smoke yogurt

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Black People.

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Why did the boy fall off the swings? He had no arms.

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 20 trees.

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Yo momma so fat, when she sits on a rainbow nothing happens, as rainbows are merely rays of light refracted off of water particles in the air, apparent to humans only on a visible spectrum.

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Why didn't the black man drink out of the white water fountain? Because he wasn't thirsty.

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How are a cow and a wall the same? They both go "moo". Except for the wall.

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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Your mom is so fat that I worry she may develop diabetes.

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Justin Bieber.

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"Hheheheh Hey Butthead"- "Were Gonna Score!"

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Why was billy made fun of his whole life? Because he's mentally retarded

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Our societal waste doesn't deserve to be called a group. They fail to organize themselves and lack the intelligence to support themselves. Let's call them a collective. Similar to dust, or smarter than them, bacteria.

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Why do women get pregnant? Beacuse it hurts and they deserve it.

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Your Mom is so fat... Her doctor told her that if she didn't start watching her cholesterol she might suffer from heart related illness in the near future.

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In Soviet Russia, joke tells YOU! ...because that is the syntax of the language.

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A blind man cant see this joke, so I probably shouldnt write it..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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