A blonde woman walked into a bar. She ordered a scotch.

Womens Rights.

what's the difference between a zebra and a horse They are spelled differently

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

Why was the 6 year old girl crying? Her step-dad kicked her in the face.

What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A niggarette

How can you tell if your roomate is gay? If he gets an erection when you have anal sex with him.

How do you fit four elephants in a car ? Two in the front and two in the back

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

What happened when the Mexican man contracted the muscles of his large bowel after a large meal? Shit made its way to his anus

Larry: Why did the chick cross the road? Jeff: Chick? Don't you mean chicken? Larry: Just answer the question. Jeff: Um, why? Larry: Wrong.

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

A man became infected with Staphylococcal Food Poisoning. The doctor said, "You only have 24 hours to live." He died 24 hours later.

Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the appropriate amount of medicine as directed by her doctor for her condition.

say cheese

What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

Q: how do you catch a bear? A: you dig a hole, fill the hole with ashes, surround the hole with peas, and when the bear comes to take a pea kick him in the ash hole

Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg. Chickens evolved from their pre-historic ancestors who each laid an egg with a slight genetic mutation until one egg contained what is now classified as the modern chicken.

Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

what do you call a black chef glendon

What's worse than 100 babies tied to a tree. 1 baby tied to 100 trees

Why did the chicken cross the road. It's head was cut off and it didn't know where it was

What's 1+1? 69.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...