Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Does it really matter?

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Why did Bob throw butter out the window, Because he is mentally retarded.

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HURT

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What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

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How many people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, more people would just make it harder.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? a new bike.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Jesus Christ how dumb can you get.

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What is red white and blue Blood. I was lying about the white and blue.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Kid With ADD A Kid With AD- Oh Look! A Squirrel!

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Not a Jehovah's Witness, let me in!

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How did Matt stop the robbers? He called the police.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a pair of shoes and gloves

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Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

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Whats worse than bad sex. Being nice raped in the anus by a teletubby.

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What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

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oh whatever donald trump's not going to be president. stop pretending he is

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What is shit? It's Deshitified already.

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Two men walk into a bar. Realizing that they aren't alcoholics and don't drink, they walk back out.

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Q: What do you call an American who has both Irish and Italian ancestry? A: An American.

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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What's the difference between a bird and a horse? - Both can fly, exept the horse.

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What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

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Why weren't u sad when your sister died? You lived in a hut and were supplied with food for a week

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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