What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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how do u make a sausage roll push it down a hill

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omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water whew, i was thirsty!

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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how do you punish hellen keller? you can't she's dead

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What did the mute person say to the deaf person? Nothing.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most rhymes rhyme But this one doesnt

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Q: Why did the horse put on cologne? A: He wanted to smell nice.

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Can Geico save save you 50% on your car insurance? Does a former drill sergent make a terrible therapist?

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? How would she know? shes blind, deaf and mute; and incapable of knowing what she received.

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There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

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How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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Have you read Shakespeare? Dunno. Who wrote it? Shakespeare.

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What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and now has two jobs to support her family.

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In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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What do you call a can of beans? A can of beans.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

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How do you kill a blonde? You wait until she dies of old age, then copyright her death.

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What did the runner say after he ran 10 miles? I just ran 10 miles.

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what is worse than finding a fly in your coffee been raped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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