So there's a monkey in a bar. I forgot the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have woman's rights Knock knock Who's there? NOT Sally, she's in the kitchen

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How many illegal immigrants does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Illegal immigrants don't use lights, they'd get caught. Dumbass.

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There were once three bears who lived in a cottage in the forest. They left to go to the market one day. While they were gone a blonde girl walked into their cabin. Meanwhile at the market, everyone was freaking out that there were bears there.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

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What's the difference between your wife and a female dog? none - they are both bitches!

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Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

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How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

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How many Legos can you stick up your nose? I'm sure its very painful and considered stupid so don't try it.

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Rsoes aer rde, voiltes are bule, i have dyslexia. It's not funny.

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If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

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Q: Ask me if I read the terms of use before I submitted this joke. A: I didnt

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what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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your mama's so fat she wears big clothing

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Q: What's worse than falling off a mountain A: Falling off a mountain into a pile of spikes

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Obama

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

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What's the difference between Stevie Wonder and Kevin Bacon? There's none. Neither of them is a taxi driver.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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