So a girl says "I want to be a banana when I grow up". She's set unrealistic goals and her parents fear she may be autistic.

What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

Why did The Chicken cross The Road? The Chicken was a new drug dealer to town and he did a deal with The Road , the town's existing drug dealer (they used these nicknames to hide their identities), but then back stabbed him to try and take the whole area for himself. Money and Power, as always.

a man walks into a bar and was arrested because it wasn't a bar it was a bank and he shot and killed 4 people during the armed robbery

Today i decided to burn calories, so I grabbed my lighter from the counter and put it in my pocket and proceeded to the treadmill.

what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

What's as bad as doing something you don't like? Doing another thing you don't like

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

How do you drown a blonde? Weigh her down and throw her into a body of water.

What is white and hard to catch? A refrigerator

sexual intercourse.

What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

planned on writing you all an antijoke decided i wouldn't.

Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

what's the last thing you want to hear during surgery? your wife complaining

What do you call it when you eat cheese that's not yours? Stealing.

How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? If you need an electrician to screw in a lightbulb, you're a moron.

Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.

Whats the difference between a Preius and a vagina? One's the possibly the greatest invention of all time and possibly the only hope for the future of man kind. The others a Preius.

-What's sad about four black guys driving off a cliff? -They were my friends.

How did the fat kid stop the bus? He didn't...

what did the book say to the lamp? nothing because BOOKS CANT TALK

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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