What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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What's Arabs' cutlery? Bread

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Why did the Europeans colonise Africa Because they couldn't do it themselves

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef

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A man recently set the world record for jumping into a foot of water from 50 feet high. Luckily, this made the clean-up rather simple.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c- Moo

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What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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Q) Why are there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest

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19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

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A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

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ask me if im a door yes

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Three moose were in the middle of the road. They were then shot by a maniac hunter.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just kidding, he didn't cross the road, he had no legs.

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What do you call a black man stealing your tv? A thief

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this website...

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What did johanne buy when she got pregnant? A staircase

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

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Don't believe in Atheists.

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Titanic with will smith. Girl: I wont ever let go of you. Leo: Drowns. Smith: Move your fat ass over girl, there is like room for me and fifthy kids there yo! Me: Bitch if you need to float on a piece of wood where six of us could fit, im gonna drown you.

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who grants them three wishes. The brunette wishes to go back home. The redhead wishes to go back home too. The blonde misses her friends, so she wishes to go back home too.

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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