Isn't it funny that we think it's totally normal for females to not have penises but for literally EVERY OTHER group of people, it's weird and not ok double standard?

What did the fish want to drink? Charlie Brown

An astronaut walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After waiting for about 1 and a half minutes he receives his beer. The bartender says it was 3 dollars. The astronaut checks his wallet and finds no money so he pays with credit card. The bartender swipes his credit card but the card doesn't work. So the astronaut takes out his debit card. When the bartender swipes the debit card it worked. In relief the astronaut looks at the bartender and says "Thank you" and then goes home.

What do a plane and a flight attendant have in common? They're both going somewhere in their careers. Aside from the flight attendant.

What is the difference between Boyscouts and Jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness. Oh come on in, I would love to learn more about your religion.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer...and the other is a watermelon.

Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

Q: What did the guy with glasses say to the guy without glasses? A: Dude your not wearing glasses.

What did one German man say to the other? Wo ist das Badezimmer?

what did lois call peter when she first saw him? i dont dont know do you?

Dislike if you are gay (watch how many dislikes this joke gets :P)

what do u call 2 puerto rician men playing basketball? won on won

Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

What is worse then failing a test? Cancer

Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

What do you call your mom after she brings a guy home from a bar? A very caring woman because she doesn't want him driving drunk.

Why did Visellet stop eating cherries? Because she choked on a pit and died.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one. he was an electrician

What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

What is the difference between a girl and a woman? Age

why did ya dad eat ya food?? because ya sister

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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