What's Worse Than Unripened Fruit? Crippling Depression.

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What do an onion and a hamster have in common? They are both in my Grandma's omelette.

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Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

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Two children are opening presents for Christmas. Daughter: "Look how many beautiful things I've got, look how much parents love me! And you got a Jo-Jo! Ha-ha!" Son*playing with Jo-Jo*: "Yeah, some of us have Jo-Jo, and some of us leuchemia. Ha-ha."

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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what do you call someone that works in a corner shop? Mohamed

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why was 6 afraid of 7? He's not.

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T-rex: If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, oh...

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What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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why did the boy fall of his bike He got shot in the face

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how do you poke a chinese person in the eye? with a credit card!

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how do kill a black guy? shoot him in the face

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3 men walk into a bar, and the fourth guy behind them had the sense to duck under it.

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Why couldn't the dwarf mother reach for the top shelf? Her height was at a mini-mum.

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Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

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Your momma's so dumb she graduated high school with a C average.

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Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

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what did the scene kid get for christmas? a gift card which he used ironically.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set in her backyard? Neither did she.

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There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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What do you say when a black girl asks you out? No!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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