You having friends.

How old is Batman? Old enough to be a bat.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half of a worm. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

How else can an Asian wear a contact lens? Too bad for them. They can;t sucks for them. Asians with small eyes EXCEPT FOR INDIANS look ugly

What did the blind boy get for Christmas? The same toys from last year.

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

Why are the Jamaicans in the kitchen? because they are bad men

Chuck Norris screams in pain.

Knock knock. "Who's there?" "It's Mr. Johnson, your next door neighbor." "Come on in."

Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

What did the cover say when it fell off the bed? Oh sheet!

What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

Roses are red,violets are blue you want me but i dont want you!

Q: What did bulbasoar say to charmander? A: Bet ya thought I was gunna say Bulbasoar!!

Help I'm being raped!

a man walks into a bar he has a drinking problem and we are all consered

squirrels with massive bonerss

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! I won the battle but lost the war: I'm Donald Trump!

What did the cannibal eat for breakfast? Waffles.

Why did the clown go to jail? For 23 charges of rape and murder.

so i was F***in this guy the other day with my penis.....shit! i mean i was F***in this girl and i jizzed

A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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