why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted AIDS

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A small child walks past a man on the street: Fortunately, as the man hates children he is perfect height to let a massive fart rip in his face on the way past. His mum looks disgusted. They carry on with their day.

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Two peanuts walked into a bar... One was a salted.

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Why is an elephant large, grey and wrinkled? Because if it was small, round and smooth it would be an aspirin.

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Q: What is the answer to 255 x 23? A: A number!

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What did the man do when he crossed the road? Nothing he got hit by a car

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Wanna hear something dirty? Mud.

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What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

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How did the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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One day there was a guy who went on a date with a girl. They went to the movies and ate popcorn. After the movie ended they had a candlelit dinner at a restaurant nearby. The guy ordered a fried chicken and the girl ordered a watermelon salad. They went home after a great dinner. I'm not sure how the story ends but I remember the story was racist.

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Welcome to die!

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roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you wh*re

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Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

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What happend when 1 second past after 7:00 am? It was still 7:00 am.

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What do you call an Asian pilot? A pilot...

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A clown a hockey player and a...........what the heck that's all I got.

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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Why was the boy with no arms and legs crying? He had a lit match in his anus.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Sorry, what? your door is kind of thick.

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Knock Knock .....................Oh it was just the TV

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting eaten alive by midgets with down syndrome

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Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

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Roses are red Violets are blue Cats meow Dogs have four legs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops