Q: Why was the man eating his foot? A: Because he was a part of the circus.

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What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 9/11

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Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller see or hear? She was blind and deaf.

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A black man is driving a nice car when he's suddenly pulled over by the police. "Do you know why I pulled you over?" asks the cop. "No officer" replies the black man. "You have a taillight out. However I'm going to just let you off with a warning because you seem like an upstanding citizen. Have a nice day."

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What’s brown, sticky and smells like poo? Shit!!

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A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

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-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

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What do you call an anti joke that's not funny? Non-existent.

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What's black and blue and red all over? Due to the infinite nature of the universe many items both natural and manufactured could be described in this manner.

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Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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What is little,red and its in the corner??? -strawberry in the corner

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a man walked into a bar "ouch"

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Someone told me once, but i had terrible memory so I had them tell me again.

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A forty-year-old man forces a young child to strip down and take a shower. The child screams and cries, but the man persists angily. He then carries the child into his bed. The child pleads, "Help! Mom, make him stop!" The mother yells back, "Just listen to him. He's your father and it's past your bedtime." This is a common night-time routine for parents with their first child

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Why did the postal worker go to work? Because he has to support his family so they do not starve like his dog.

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what do all black jokes start with (look left look right)

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What did the cat say to the dog? Nofin Eejit.

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Which of the following is the biggest? A. 7 B. 17 C. 71 D. Yo mama

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Why couldn't the Nativity have taken place in France? The winters are not warm enough to sleep in an animal cave without getting hypothermia, and there was no census taking place at the time.

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What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

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Humpdy dumpty sat on a wall and enjoyed his day off

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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