What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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what did the tomato say when he was cut open? nothing, because vegetables are unable to speak

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What happened when Satan met God ? Nothing, because neither Satan nor God exist.

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dont you love porch monkeys? no.

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your momma so stupid she dropped out of high school

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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What do you call a sleeping bull? Don't call him anything and back away slowly.

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I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

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Whats the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

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A baby seal walks in to a club

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

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Man goes to the doctors, says doctor, im depressed. ive tried everything but i just cant see the bright side of life anymore, it seems empty to me, like theres no point in existing. The doctor certifies the man as clinically depressed and alerts the relevant authorities.

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if this joke was a potato, it would be a good potato

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What is black, white and red all over? A black man has been shot and a white paramedic is standing over him trying to save his life.

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Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

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What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

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Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

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A man was walking down the street in the pitch black dark and he looked into a pitch black dark window. What did he see? Pitch black dark people.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Who. Who, Who? Shut up you damn owl, I'm trying to deliver a pizza.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Clouds are white. Thank God I am too.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Waking up with a snapping turtle up your butt.

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Roses are red, violets are blue No they're not, violets are violet

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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