how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

I like U.............................nicorns :D

A wanted man walks into a bar. The police come and take him to jail.

There was a irishmen in his house. He was thirsty. so he drank some water

What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

why is justin bieber so pale? Because he hasn't come out of the closet.

Why did the black woman have an affair? Because she had an unsatisfying sex life, her old husband was boring, and she was curious about being with other men.

if ruddel jumped on your back what do you do leave him on or pull him offf? shoot him.

Do you have to be so, you know... Open about what we are gonna do and stuff? I mean I know some people here, and you are a married man and you know.

Why did the computer load on facebook? Thats what you typed in.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did Santa go to a rap concert? Because Santa was a rapper

Roses are red Violets are blue Theres a crazy ass alpaca ready to take a shit on you

What does a cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? Procedes with his long difficult hunt to find another companion who accepts him for what he is, without the fear of being eaten.

Why did the boy cry? because his tear-ducts were agitated by an emotional reaction due to jokes that were ironically hilarious because of how bland and usual the punchlines were

Why didn't Helen Keller drive? With all that time she spent learning how to read and write despite being blind and deaf, authoring numerous books, and being a prolific political activist; she simply did not have the substantial time to acquire a driver's license.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

I've never seen your mother, so I won't make any vile suggestions concerning her weight.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Because the light was green.

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

Two cannibals were eating a man, one at the top and one at the bottom. The cannibal at the top said, "are you having fun down there?" The cannibal at the bottom said, "yeah, I'm having a ball!"

How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

Why did the man drink a glass of water? Why not?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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