A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

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That`s my friends phone, I can call you from mine too if you want, please just don't hurt me, let me speak to you, I promise I will explain everything.

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An American, an Irish man, a Chinese man and a Black man walk in to a Bar, the Bartender takes their order

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LeBron James: Kobe, i got a ring will you stop making fun of me? Kobe Bryant: Yes Kobe and Michael Jordan: LeBron asked if he gets a ring if we'll stop making fun of him LeBron James: Hey Kobe why didn't you answer when i called? Kobe Bryant: Sorry, I only heard it ring once

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Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

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Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin Before He Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

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Why did the blond have a wierd look on her face? Because she was ugly

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped.

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What's short, green, and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Go home and hang yourself.

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If a white person and black person have a baby, what colour is the baby? Grey

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Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

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redtube

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His mother was a prostitute.

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Why did Muhammad pray to Jesus? Because he has low self esteem and didn't believe in himself.

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What's worse than the holocaust? An open-minded black man.

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why did the man slip on the knife? he wanted to commit suicide

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Whats the differance between a blond and a rock? I don't know. I can't think of any.

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Why did the farmer's wife leave the farm? Because she was a lesbian.

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What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

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The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Half the holocaust

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What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Leukemia

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops