what did the chicken say to the farmer? nothing, chickens dont talk.

how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

Why was the homeless man begging for money? Because he needed money to buy liquer for his severe alcohol addiction that was slowly destroying his liver.

You know what rhymes with school? Hell.

A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

What did winter say to summer? Nothing. Seasons are physically incapable of speaking because they are not living things. They are simply an idea made by humans to explain why the weather changes as the sun spins around the earth.

your mom gave me head.....phones

Yo mommas so fat they had to change 'one size fits all' to 'one size fits most'

Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

What do you call an Arab with a long beard? An Arab with a long beard you stereotypical piece of crap.

A Jew, an African American, and a homosexual are on an island. They all came to Manhattan for different reasons and are enjoying the lives they've built there.

Math mean: mental, abuse, to, human

What's black, white, black, white, black, white, and red? A horse with it's heard chopped off.

what has a hard shaft and an even harder head? A hammer

what did the chinese guy say to the black guy? hello

What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

Why is the boy lying down on the floor? The chandelier fell on him.

What did Britney Spears say to the Mexican? Hit me baby Juan more time.

What is funnier than dead babies? Dead babies aren't funny, Carlos Mencia and Tom Bergeron are funny.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

whats round red and taste like candy? such a thing doesn't exist

Knock knock. Who's there? The Door! He then broke down into tears as the nightmares from his schizophrenia had lead to a severely crippled mental state.

If there are four gay men that come into a bar and need to sit down when all you have is one stool; what do you do? Get three more stools.

What does a gay horse eat? Other gay horses.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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