Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Time to get a watch

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Good to see you today!

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What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

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Two nineteenth century men walk into a bar. Their wives didn't complain, because if they did they'd get hit. hard.

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One day an Indian boy asked his father why they have such long names? The dad answered him in a such a simple and concise way, that the little boy understood.

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what is the difference between 10 and 3 7

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It's the police sir. There's been an accident.

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What's the easiest way to become filthy rich? There are many ways to earn money. Invest some time into researching the topic.

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KSI

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Mom: what does IDK, LY, and TTYL mean? Son: I don't know, love you, and talk to you later. Mom: OK, I'll ask your sister.

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Me.

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A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

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A man walks into a bar. He asks the bartender for a glass of milk. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve milk here.

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what do you think when you see someone throw a man with no arms and legs into the ocean? chances of survival are minimal

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

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Q: What did the Black Man say to the Mexican Fellow Guy? A: Hello.

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A woman walked into a bar at least that is what she tells her friends about how she got a blackeye.

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Why was Timmy crying? because his impaled his dog while in a drunken rage

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Because they're dead, they cant screw in a light bulb. Even if they were alive, it would be highly improbable that a baby could screw in a light bulb.

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Knock Knock. F uck off.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has an abusive farmer and needs to get away before it gets any worse.

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The adventures of Helen Keller:

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Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops