Why did the airplane crash? It was hit by a flying refrigerator.

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What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

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Why was girl happy on the day she found out she wasn't pregnant? -It was her birthday.

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Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

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What Is big, round, and looks like gaben. Gaben!

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Often, Asians argue that they can speak properly... Like instead of L's, they use "R's." Sure... http://eng.tekkenpedia.com/wiki/Leo#Introduction

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A Polish man is walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He runs into one of his buddies, who asks, "Hey! What's in the bag?" The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says, "Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one." The man replies, "I'm sorry, my friend, but gambling is against my morals, especially when my family's only nutrition for the week is on the line."

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What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

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A priest, a midget, and the toothfairy walk into a bar. Barack Obama.

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A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Im Really Stoned And you have met with a terrible fate haven't you?

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what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

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What do you get when you have 5 Russians, a few 8 year olds, and guns? A kidnapping

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Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith, I'm the town rapist.

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Why did the black man have to stand in the bus? All of the other seats were taken.

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why did the drug dealer die... because he got terminal cancer and died during the first 3 weeks

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I tried to call my friend in Haiti. It went straight to vibrate.....

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whats worse than vegetables? Fisting Grandmas

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What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Warenth Gibson. Warenth Gibson who? Warenth Gibson. What part of that don't you get?

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How do you trap a squirrel? You carefully set up a trap and place acorns in the trap.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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