What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

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Micheal jackson had half a pie, Fred had the other half of the pie, They both shared a pie.

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What's worse then having your wife leaving you? Taking the kids with her.

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Kill her entire family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares, it's a chicken.

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Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

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How do you keep a secret? Kill yourself.

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How do you make 5 lbs of fat look good? Draw a smiley face on it.

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What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

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Have you heard the one about the monkey who jumped off the roof? Neither have I.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

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3 guys were caught trespassing in a field and were sent to jail. The cop asked the first guy, "What were you doing in the field? He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop asked the second guy, "What were you doing in the field?" He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop then asked the third guy, "Lemme guess, you were blowing bubbles too? The guy replied, "No silly, I am Bubbles!"

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Your mom is so fat that she is at risk for type two diabetes.

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Lindsay Lohan

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Its april fools day and a women is in labour and has to rush to the hospital. Her husband couldn't make it so it is just the doctor and her in the delivery room. 4 hours of labour go by and complications arise. 12 hours later she gives birth toa beautiful baby boy. The doctor wipes the baby off and goes to hand it to her but then suddenly pulls it back and kicks it a cross the room. The mother screamed "my baby boy!" and the doctor smiles and says "April fools! It was already dead!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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A black guy and a white girl are having sex. The white girl screams "I'm pregnant!!!!" The black guy says "i'll help you take care of it" "I love you sweetie and nothing will come between us"

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I slipped and fell in the shower today. Good thing my dad caught me

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wouldnt it be ironic if chuck norris was shooting blanks

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what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

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Girls Lacrosse.

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whats a cross between michael jackson and arnold shwarzanegga? Michaelwasanigga

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops