A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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What would you call a two-foot Irishman named Max? Max.

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i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

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Good boy

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Knock Knock Whos there Me Oh, come in

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Knock Knock Sadly the old woman was death and didn't hear the door knock.

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How do you have fun while stuck in traffic? Play bumper cars!

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Did you know that Claire Seiter likes to drinkapplseiter? No. Oh well she does..

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How do dinosaurs pay their bills? They don’t, dinosaurs don’t have a capital system.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Knock knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Bob Matthews.

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how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

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Want to burn 3000 calories in under 5 MINUTES? Take a store bought pizza and put it in the over for as long as you want. Just watch the calories burn away in a puff of smoke!

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What is the best thing about dating a slut? You can return her at Build-a-Hoe Workshop.

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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Why can't bob fix it? I through a frige at him.he died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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A man went to the doctor. He had experienced some strong abdominal pain. The doctor looked at him and ordered some tests to be done. He had a kidney stone. The day after he passed the stone, he got ran over by a bus. The man's name was Bob.

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How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

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Yo mama's so skinny, she should probably go in for eating disorders' counseling.

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Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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wanna hear a joke? i dont like kids wanna hear a lie? im typing with two hands wanna hear a another? my hand isnt on my weiner

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Explain the term 'Standard of Living'? Not having sex with diseased and obese women.

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whats worse than having a gay friend ? 9/11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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