So three men walk into a bar and buy a round of drinks for everyone. As they do this, three kenyans die of dehydration while their families weep at their feet.

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:y do people talk? ;idk :oh then nevermind

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What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar

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What do you get when you post the same thing a million times? Hate

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Why did the blonde leave the lamp on while sleeping? Because it helps to see in case you need to get up in the middle of the night. YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO SAY "BECAUSE THEY'RE A LIGHT SLEEPER!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

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What succeeds most of the time? The population of a field with grass.

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What's red bubbly and spins around? A baby in a microwave

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How did the chicken get to the other side? He didnt, he got ran over.

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How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet.

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If everyone in China jumped up and down at the same time they would lose all credibility as a nation for organising such a pointless excursion.

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What did Zeus say to Hades? Nothing. Both are mythological beings created by the Greek civilization to explain why many things in the world happened, mostly because of a lack of modern science.

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What happened to the boy who wanted to jump off a cliff? He jumped off a cliff.

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Nero, please pick up the phone, I wont ever do that, it was a mistake okay? Stop that, my sister wont ever! My mom whatever! But if you lie a finger on my sister, I will kill you, I am at the outside, which room are you at? Tell me you coward fucker! Tell me!

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Why did the little boy fall of his bicycle? It was the first time he road without his training wheels.

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Man: Guess what! Other man: What? Man: Chicken butt

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Prostitution is bad.......

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What does a blonde say when she wants to order a large pizza ? "Hi, I would like a large pizza, please."

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q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

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What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? There's twenty of them

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Q:a black man walks down the street with alot of light whats happaning he A:is it the parade of light

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Onions are like loved ones... They are both nouns. And you cry when you cut into them.

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What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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