Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? Tests.

The original anti joke. What is jeopardy?

Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

How do you save the world in 2012? You aren't. 2012 isn't going to happen!

Man 1- What's red, black, and white all over? Man 2- What? Man 1- Half a penguin! Man 2 became seriously disturbed from this joke, as he saw the movie Happy Feet two days ago. He went to intense therapy and became mentally deranged.

A woman is shopping at a grocery store. She picks up a half gallon of skim milk, 2 loaves of wheat bread, one dozen organic eggs, and some carrots. She goes to the checkout line. "You must be single." the clerk says. Amazed at the flattering insight of the clerk, the woman says, "Yes I am. How could you tell?". "Because you're ugly".

Roses are red Violets are blue i suck at poems nice titz

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

An Englishman, an American and a Frenchman are standing on the side of a cliff. The Englishman jumps off the cliff. The American also jumps off the cliff. He is followed by the Frenchman. Suicide and depression are major problems in today's world regardless of nationality.

What did the chicken say when it crossed the road? Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

A: I accidentally shot my sister with a rifle! B: you don't have a sister? A: exactly

Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

A: knock knock B: who's there A:come in B:come in who?

How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

What's a Gingers favorite drink? Coke!

american idol

what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

Q: Why did Rapunzel fall out of the tower? A: Because she was a dumb bitch.

whats the differnece between a bag of dead babies and a ferarri? nothing ill never have either

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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