Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken had just escaped from the slaughterhouse where he witnessed the brutal decapitation of his entire family and in his heightened emotional state was unable to map out a safer and more sensible route.

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did you hear about the mexican that went to college? yes

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What's red and black and looks good on a Jew? A bullet wound.

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What do you call a cow with big horns? A bull.

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Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

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How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

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What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? All over. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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ask me if i'm a tree are you a tree? No.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

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Why couldn't the basketball player jump anymore? Because he broke his back.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave Smith. Oh, hey Dave. Come in.

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Clyde: Hey John! :D John: Hey clyde! :D Clyde: :D! John: :D! Clyde: :D, :), :|, :(, D'X John: ? hey man, are you ok? Wtf is going on with you? Clyde: Man, it's not me... :'(... It's you... It's your... Your... John: My what? Clyde: YOUR FACE!!!! D'X

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Roses are red Violets are violet Don't know why people are saying they're blue

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why couldn't she get back up? She blew up

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Why couldn't the Asian couple have a white baby? Because two Wongs were mixed up in the paperwork so as a result the other Wong family ended up getting the child.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in every apple.

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how do you kill an African baby ? put it in the microwave for roughly 45 minutes

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What did one Stoner say to the other? "I'm hungry, let's order pizza."

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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What do you call a flying jew? Smoke.

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What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

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rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops