What do you call a saxaphone playing unicorn, that's flying away to a distant planet on a penguin? a dream

thumb_up thumb_down -3

So one time this woman was learning...

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How did the newborn baby come out of a man? It was ejaculated as a sperm from his testicles

thumb_up thumb_down +40

snooki from jersey shore walks into a bar and gets arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Have you seen the 6th sense? Nope, is it good? Yeah Bruce Willis is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -17

oops

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the dog chase it's tail? it has a case of OCD where he was obsessed with catching his tail and would spin until he passed out or threw up.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Cover myself in Vaseline and cry in the dark for 4, maybe 5 hours with or without a wooden splintery dildo in my arse..”

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Chris Bosh's neck

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than losing a basketball game by 1 point? Dying of lukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is Hitler's favourite Yu-Gi-Oh card? Blue Eyes, White Dragon.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was the grandomther crying? She just got pepper sprayed.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

To whomever it may concern, You are currently reading this anonymous letter from someone anonymous. I’m currently watching you read this letter. I am not a threat. I am not Big Brother. I am someone anonymous. You will never find out who I am. You may have a few ideas of who this might be, but you will be wrong. Just know that I am watching you. That is all. I love you. All for Jesus -A

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy mushroom soup in my testicles belly Buton cheese.com ( tickle my. Nipple frog)

thumb_up thumb_down -24

afbn;fjnf;ajnvaf;djvnadf;vvjkfvnfvjalnvjkfvnaeljvknfljkvndfsljvnadfjvndflvkadjnfvldjfnvlakdjfnvldfjnvaldfjkvndfjkvandfvjlkdfnvaldkjvndlfjvandflvdjnvadljfnvdlfjvnadflvjdnfvladjnvdlkfjvnadlfjvndaflvjakdnflvjdakfnvalfdknvljdnflvjdanlfjvnadflvjandfvljkfndvladjkfnvldajfknvalherluhwprgqehgpquetryhpqwiourpqoitqyert9134857wieosdfljkealdfjkgfrgjuy0qo48wriehflqgetarkgjfhjkljgbflgjbfgjbflsdjfbgbkglirueerhigqehgluqeht3qt9384yt19834ty308748574785uifhsldhfljaghlkjfghfldkjaghlkfjdhaglkjhdglkjhfdgioerqoertueroiuytqeuirytqerouityqerotuiyertiuytqoiuerhajvnasdnjkvalfn I stopped reading too.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

P1: knock knock P2: go away!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

And I want you like Anne Frank wanted ... nobody to read her diary. Cuz, like a diary is a collection of secret things that no one else reads, that's the whole point of a diary. Millions of people have breached this little girl's privacy after she was chased by Nazis. Kick her while she's down.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why can't Demetrius swim? Because he has a genetic disorder where he is paralyzed from the waste down, so he is therefore incapable of propelling himself through the water

thumb_up thumb_down +7

knock, knok who's there? ya ya who? yahoo

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops