What's funnier than a dead baby? -A dead baby sitting next to a kid with Down Syndrome.

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when a midget takes weed, does he get high or medium???

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What rhymes with bigger and can jump really high? Tigger

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where was the heart of ocean found. madelain mcanns urn

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What word rhymes with orange? -Adult onset diabetes

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What's a stupid joke on anti-joke? One that involves a random number with absolutely no meaning

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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Darth Vader: Luke, I am your father! Luke: You're not my dad!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHA PENIS

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What did chad do when his friends came over? I'm not much of a fiction man personally.

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Where do you find a baby with no arms or legs? Where you left it.

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, Ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

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Q. How many babies does it take to paint a room? A. Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did the boy drop the ice cream? Because he had a seizure.

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Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

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What does it mean if you have 5$ and Chuck Norris has 5$? Congrats! You both have five dollars!

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A horse walks into a bar. Being unable to comprehend human emotion, he shits all over the floor.

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What did the cow say to the other cow when the boy asked him for something to drink? Probably MOOO! Considering that cows cant say anything except for that

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Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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Whats black and hangs from trees in my backyard? blackberries..

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what do mexicans like most. icecubes

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What colour is an orange? Orange. What did you expect?

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what happened when the chicken crossed the road? it got ran over by a car recently after it go killed it was eaten by a hobo and the hobo died from ring worm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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