What do you call a man with an eight foot steel spike wedged in his rectum? An Ambulance

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What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

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A panda walks into a bar. He eats but then is tranquilized and taken back to the zoo.

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because of excess velocity.

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because people kept making the same joke about her not having arms so she was hoping the fall would break her neck.

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You're so ugly you got rejected from the zoo.

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Poop!!

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1: Knock, knock 2: Go away!

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What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm Helen Keller.

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Why did little jimmy fall off the building? 9/11

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioFUrwny1c

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Why was the black man fired from his job? Because the company was beginning to lose sales which then resulted in job cuts.

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What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

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A hot girl walks by a boy and he stares at her as she walks past. She see's him and asks "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied "Oh I'm sorry. You happened to look familiar and I thought 'Perhaps I've met this person before. School? No. Work? No. I then concluded I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at".

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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roses are red violets are blue however some roses are pink

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what did the white rapper say to the black rapper? i like your work. to which the which the black rapper replied, thanks.

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Q. Which one do you hate more? Jews, Mexicans, or Asians. A. I hate all of them, but jews are annoying when they resist getting stuffed in the oven.

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i said why are you disliking me he said its anti joke

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What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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