Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

Whats In My Trash? Bears

why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

What do you call a black man that flies a plane? -A pilot

i was driving home after work but i had to stop because an old lady wanted to cross the road..... the old lady was abused by her father as a child, and had Alzheimer's

Yo momma is so old that she will be moved to a nursing home next week.

Burp

Long joke Your such a downey

Why did the bus fall down? It was hit by a bus and then repeatedly battered by a blender

What is the biggest lie in the world? I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

Whats pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

suck my dick.

How are baseball and the holocaust similar? They're both games, except for the holocaust

Knock Knock. Who's there? ........ It turns out it was Helen Keller.

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

Yeah sure, you have "absolutely... ...No... ...Reason..." to... Fucking... use... This... place... at... all... But you seem to be here all the fucking time, what fucking sense does that make? That is not the matter at all fagface! Your fucking goons assaulting me because "I stole one of your aliases?" I was born Nero and will die fucking Nero, not Nerometal, not Nero of Neronism, just Nero your friendly rapist! Yeah Ill give you my fucking social info, so you... and... your... excessive... use... of... this shit... can... send... your ...fucking assholes to finish the job! Listen bitch! I am a writer! And your faggots stabbed off like half of my eyeball! I don't give a damn about this site, I want your fucking assholes to stop seeking me out in person! Hell, give me your social info, so we can "make a fucking settlement" Where I break off your head and shit down your neck!

George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the farmer cross the road? To pick up the dead chicken

When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

What's worse than getting raped? Getting anal raped twice

Yo momma so ugly that she had self esteem issues and committed suicide, making her husband extremely depressed.

A Mexican man, an American man, and an Italian man go to a bridge. The mexican said "we have too much of this in our country!" and throws pasta into the water. The Mexican man says "we have to much of this in out country!" and throws a taco into the water. The American throws in the Mexican man and says "we have to much of these in our country!"

How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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