How do you know when someone tells a bad joke? You don't find it humorous.

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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The audience was ready, the stage was set, as soon as the show ended, the actors applauded towards the audience shouting ENCORE! The audience paid and went home, then they suddenly went... HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS SCENARIO!? They cared so much about one another, that they wanted to fall in love with each other. Now that is true love that is not love people! Nerometal (Ironically my name is Nero, I bet the Neronism guys name is Dwayne Maskdork or something, seriously...)

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Me: Hey mom Mom: Hey Son Me: Whats? for dinner? Mom: I dont know

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one fish two fish red fish kill the fish

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What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

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How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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What's 9+10=? 19

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have cancer."

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

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knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

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Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

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Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

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How many dead hookers can you fit in a trunk? Five

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

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Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

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What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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What do grass and deer have in common? They're both green I lied about the deer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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