What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What the kid with no arms get for christmas? A baseball and a glove to go through with his dad

thumb_up thumb_down +50

A boy asks his father how babies are made. The father responds, "Babies are created via coital sex. A man rhythmically inserts his erect penis into a woman's vagina until he ejaculates. If his semen successfully fertilizes her egg, a baby will slowly grow in her uterus. After roughly forty weeks of gestation, the baby will be born."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats worse than getting punched in the balls? Getting punched in the balls twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Bob: Hey Jim, what's up? Jim: Obviously the sky, oh and i see a few planes too. by the way why are you asking me why don't you just look up?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: What did the teen mom put her newborn daughter up for? A: Adoption

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's worse than losing your job? Getting thrown into the sun.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing, you heartless asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A. What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew: B. Pizza's don't scream when you put them into a oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Hey, austin, what are you doing?

thumb_up thumb_down -30

your amazing just the way you are... even though you have aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Knock Knock!! Who's there? Dyphis, say goodbye to your kids.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Your mother is so fat that people make rude comments about her behind her back, but they shouldn't because she's a really nice lady.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I haven't had sex for about 2 years, 10 months, 20 days and 4 minutes. It doesn't bother me though.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the bird fall out of the sky, It hit one of the random green pipes.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the Frenchman say to the Englishman? I don't know, I don't speak French.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What do you get when an angry black man walks past you. A: You get a promotion, the black guy was your friend Bob and he had just been suspended for failing to follow police protocol when apprehending a suspect.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops