Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

Why did the sponge go to the store? The same reason all sponges go to stores: to be sold to patrons of said store.

why did the chicken cross the road? because the chicken had enough of life and wanted to commit suicide due to recent tragic events such as his cheating wife, his druggie son, his prostitute daughter, losing his home, and getting fired

some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

Billy Corgan: The world is a vampire! Me: No it's not. The world is a mass of mineral compounds that floats in space approximately 93,020,000 miles from the sun. It is not, in fact, a vampire.

What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

Why is that blond girl so dumb? Because she has fetal alcohol syndrome.

so a jew walks into a bar and leaves at 9:00 becuase he has work in the morning.

A child is watching Saturday cartoons when is father walks in and, the child is aware that the father was on an all night binge and is verbally abused

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Roses are roses Violets are violets Sugar is sugar And you're a person

High enough to know that fucking IQ is a terrible way to measure the total potential of the mind, which is potentially limitless depending on the person`s contact and control over the subconscious state.

Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing?

What do you call a pig that just took a bath? Clean!

Are you Drew?

go up to some one and say "i told you it would happen" with a straight face and walk away. it should cause a LOT of confusion.

Why did the kid have a toy truck? because he bought it

What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

I was walking down the street and a guy fell down right next to me. He woke up a hour later and asked "what smells like year old cat pee?" I said "year old cat pee retard honestly." Then he died. Morale don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to.

How do black people get rich? They collect welfare checks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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