Knock Knock Come in! :)

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What worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will you have for dinner? The duck says "quack".

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem about Red rosses and blue violets

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

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A blonde girl walks into a screen door. She is blind.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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Aww Eliza, thanks for being around in spirit, dont leave yet, I am kinda having breathing problems, and Alice says my something levels are dropping because I need solid food, please dont leave, I cant tell time even with a watch, but would you mind waiting a bit? Ill eat fast, somehow.

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U mad?

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What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

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Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

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Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten Jew flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --Amon Goeth

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around? A kitten in a blender

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What is the difference between a dog being hit by a car and an Arab being hit by a car? There are skidmarks before the dog

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

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2 gay men walked into a bar, The next day they want back to the bar, They went back on the third day but only 1 man came back out and he was in tears, This was because the other man had a cardiac arrest and died.

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To retrieve his dead relatives in the middle of the street.

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BUTTERFARTING

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Why did the black man get a life sentence in prison? Because he was involved a mass stabbing in a night club London which saw 4 local teenage girls lose there lives.

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F U C K Y O U W I T H Y O U R A N T I J O K E S

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops