youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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The.

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whats the difference between a black man and a terd ? one is a black man the other is a terd

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2 guys walk into a bar, a third guy carefully ducks under it

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The Earth is a nice place to live.

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Why are all the dinosaurs extinct? Because you touch yourself at night,

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Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

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Q: What goes up but doesn't come down? A: Columbia

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There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

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Your mother is so stupid that she was tested and proved to be mentally retarded.

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Do you need a life...? You can borrow mine! lol JUBIE! :()

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the bottom of a pit? Whatever his parents named him.

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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what did the woman call the man who ate Ham? A Pig

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What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

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so i turned on my radio.. so i could like listen to some tunes but like, it wasnt working and then like my best bud leaf was all like dude, thats a toaster.

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Whats black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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A 75 year old man walks into a college classroom and sits down. He suffers from severe dementia and realizes that he's been in the classroom before. A 75 year old man walks into a college classroom...

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Jason. Jason who? The person who is answering the door hears a chainsaw start up and suddenly realizes that Jason is the murderer from Friday the Thirteenth. The person goes and gets their shotgun, ready to blast Jason's head of when he breaks in.

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What's worse than public speaking? Public masterbation. *Spelled it wrong purposly to bypass the filter*

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Wait your turn patiently.

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon..... so he can eat it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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