What body part did German prince Heinrich von Missingpenis lack? His toenail.

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A giant storm loomed over a village atop a hill. Citizens were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from the age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest. Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes. Finally, Rosie, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who has been through 13 interventions and countless suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonny, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a carton of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took the carton of Ribena, crumpled it up, spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven." The man nods nervously. St. Peter asks, "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

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give me a thumbs up

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

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Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

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Q. What has four legs, but can't walk? A. A dog dying of a serious illness...

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"knock knock?" ITS 2012 WE HAVE DOOR BELLS!!!

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What did the Orange say to the Apple? Hi

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A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his crotch... The bartender calls the police as the man is arrested as piracy an act of robbery or criminal violence.

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Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

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Leslie's husband admitted to being gay, which came to the surprise of no one, seeing as Leslie is a man.

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Why was the white man's baby black? The mother was black.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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whats the difference between a European and a african an african has more pigment in his skin due to prolonged exposure to light

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What is an anti-joke? This is.

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What's that on my back? Tell me it's your phone ! Its my phone.

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Why wasn't the white guy voted for president? He had down syndrome

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Whats worse than swinging a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

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What's worse than reading? A lot, but there are too many things to name

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why was the boy sad? because he was raped by a clown.

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a man asked another man what time its it. The man responded by telling him the time and asking why he wanted to know. "thats none of your business" he replied. Why did he say it was none of his business? A- because it was none of his business.

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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