There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

why did the girl cry while watching starwars? She was being raped

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

I hate long jokes -_-

What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

Why are black people so good at basketball because they can jump shoot and steel

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

penis

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

Have you heard about the awesome farmer? He was outstanding in his field. -ymda

Pooring urine into your eyes, is a natural way to cure pink eye. Found this out this morning.

What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

Christianity is not a religion; it's a relationship with God.

Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

Why doesn't Santa Claus change his socks on Christmas Eve? Because he isn't real.

What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

why is my brother white and i am brown? the milk man is very fast!

A man walks into a bar The bar now has a hole in it.

Q: what do you get when you mix a bull dog and a shiitzu? A: a dog

What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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