"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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knock knock who's there boo Jenny had a heart attack due to the scare, she was taken to hospital and died

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Why isn't this joke funny? Because it has no point.

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How did the stuntman die? He was gored by a buffalo on a trip to Yellowstone.

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yo momma so fat that she needs to lose weight

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Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

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DO U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD BIRD BIRD, BIRD IS THE WORD? DON'T U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD? EVERYOBODY KNOWS THAT THE BIRD IS THE WORD! Oh, no i did not know that the bird was the word.

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what is the best way to start a car? put in the key and turn it.

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Did you hear the one about the bus driver? Me neither

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Q. you know who is so sad A. you for looking up a site for jokes that aren't even good

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a car? I don't have a car in my garage.

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There was once a man named Larry. Larry was an office worker for a paper company. One day when Larry was counting papers he got a papercut on his left hand. Therefore his finger began to bleed as he sat in agony. What did Larry do next? He got up and got a band-aid. Larry continued his paper work at his desk.

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Why couldn't the little girl see in the dark? She had no eyes.

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Why are there so many jokes about germans on Anti-Joke? Because the Germans epitomize the flavour of anti-jokes perfectly and they have the whole nazi history thing going on which is ripe ground for many an anti-joke

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You know what happened when I kissed a girl? I enjoyed it so immensely that I received an erection.

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

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Whats worse than the Holocaust. A worm in your apple.

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J.D. has 10 vaginas and 2 penis's

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What did Robin say to Batman before they entered the Batmobile? "Batman, I'm a necropheliac."

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. What do flowers have to do with this joke I want to tell you?

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Q: What's red, pink and spins round and round? A: A baby in a blender Q2: What's red, pink, green, and smells bad? A2: The same baby 2 weeks later

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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