??????????? ??????????????? "Hello, idiot teacher! You eat milk."

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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Why did the Chinese Arab buy blue paint? He already had red in his basement.

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A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

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Your mom is so skinny that she may have anorexia, yet she could treat it so she doesn't die.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

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Why did the Black Man only eat one apple a day? He was trying to stay healthy. On an unrelated note he was under the poverty line, and addicted to an illegal substance. He does not represent African-American society very well.

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Friends are a lot like trees. If you hit them multiple times with an axe, they will fall down.

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The Pterodactyl species became extinct 65 million years ago, and thus if you saw one today, you would be immediately taken into a mental hospital.

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Why didn't Johnny go to the party? He was aborted as a fetus

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*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

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A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Doctor Doctor! I think i'm epileptic! I'm not the Doctor, I'm the receptionist. You're a hypochondriac, now wait in the Que, like everybody else Mrs. Davis.

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Q: Why did you fall of that swing? A: Because I'm fat.

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a murderer sees a young child left alone at a park... he promptly finds the childs mother and returns her to her home.

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Why did Peter go to the dentist? Because he had to go to the dentist!

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Knock-Knock Whos there? You're about to get shell shocked...

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So three hikers decide to face the deadly challenge of climbing Mount Everest. They were unaware of the risks, and were all brutally killed in an avalanche.

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Have you heard the deaf guitarist? He's really good.

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A guy walked into a bar. He got drunk. He hit a small child with his Suburu and was charged with a DUI.

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Nicole Ritchie walks into a grocery store.

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there once was a man from Afghanistan. Who wanted to bang his brother-istan. they licked and sucked. and kissed then f**ked, he got aids. and never did that-again!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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