A woman gets home from bying tampons to use later in the month. She walks into the house and sees a heart box with a note from her husband of 5 years. The note reads: Roses are red - violets are blue - Fudge Is Sweet - Heres some Fudge...........She then puts the note down, eats the fudge, and has diarrhea a few hours later. The husband comes home and feels bad because he forgot that fudge upsets his wife's stomach. Later that night the wife asks her husband to have anal sex with her. The husband agrees but later regrets his action since his dick is now discolored and smells of shit..........Two days later the family dog dies. The wife and husband mourn. I like cheese

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What's the difference between Google Chrome and Bing? Not much. They are both very reliable and informative internet browsers.

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My parents died!

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What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

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how do you get 20 people in a mini? open the door would be a good start but i dont think they will all fit.

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What does a dog do in his spare time? Lick himself.

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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What do you say when the cheese isn't yours? The cheese does not belong to me.

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Why did the little girl cry? The little girl cried for mercy as her attackers violated every inch of her innocent body, tearing her up from the inside until her organs were forced out of her anus and blood squirted from her ears as the pressure inside her body exceeded to a maximum. After the attackers were done with the corpse, they cut off her limbs and stapled them to her head.They placed her now decomposing body on the front porch of the worried parents' house and rang the doorbell.

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Q:What do you call chocolate without a gag reflex? A: Choc-o-late (Choke a lot)

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Why didn't the cat eat its supper? It was dead.

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Ludwig van Beethoven, John Coltrane, John Lennon, and Justin Bieber are out for lunch at a taco stand. The owner calls the police, and Justin Bieber is arrested for digging up corpses.

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

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Your time.

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Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because he didn't have a face

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Make an effort in life whenever you want. Fight trough life when you got no other choice.

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What do you call a giggling penguin? Personification.

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a boy meets a girl the rest is censored

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What's the difference between a car tyre and 365 used condoms? One is a Goodyear. The others a fucking great year!!! San2

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Chuck Norris is dead......

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What's blue, cold and makes people cry? A dead baby

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knock knock. Whos there? YELLOW PEOPLE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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