Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the farmer that was trying to kill it.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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justin beiber has a penis hahahahahahhaah lol not really

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A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

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What did the mute say to the deaf man?

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Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Were both dogs!

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Misthrown

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Hitler arrives at his neighbor's barmitzfah... fashionably late.

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Why'd The Little Kid Drop His Ice Cream Cone? Because He Witnessed His Mom get Raped in front of his house by the man driving the ice cream truck and the realized that he was licking frozen semen......

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What do you call a large group of Apes attacking San Francisco? Well, it isn't called anything but coincidentally there is a movie called Rise of the Planet of the Apes which was released August 5, 2011 starring James Franco and Andy Serkis. -David Bruggen

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Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

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my mom raped yerr foot

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why did the women have to black eyes? obviously because her husband hit her because he wanted a sandwich and he slapped the bitch and told her to get in the kitchen!

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Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

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ask me if im a tree are you a tree? yes.

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What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

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What happens when you murder someone? The Government murders you.

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Why did Santa go to a rap concert? Because Santa was a rapper

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What do you call a dumb blonde with no hair? You don't, since there is no way of knowing that she is blonde.

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I wont vouch for anybody right now, but nobody I know would attack anyone, I know I can be overly sensitive at times, but its not fun anymore, stop that.

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In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs? Nothing, it cant come

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why did the chicken cross the road? to touch the goats beard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops