I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

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Q: Men are always very careful to have penises. Why don't women care enough to have them? A: That's a very good question.

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Dear diary, its day 230, the apple supply's are running low, the doctors are closing in, the dentists have been chanting "its time to go to the dentist" all day, I wont be able to hold them back much longer, help.

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Why did the meme cross the road? MEME XD

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What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

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I used to fit trough doors, but then I got tall... I used to play with other babies, but then I got tall... (daradadadadan) I used to look up to you, but then I got tall (OH YEAH!) but then I got tall, but then I got tall, but then I got tall! Moral: Censorship should be illegal.

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Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

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You know what they say about a man with big feet! They say it's indicative of the size of his penis, although there's no scientific evidence backing this up.

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how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

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Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

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What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

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2 women were sitting quietly.

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A man walks into a bar. The second man sees the first man's mistake and ducks. The third man needs to take no precautions as he is a midget and can simply walk under the bar.

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Rudolf the rednosed reindeer died today. He was reported flying over Madrid when he was hit by a jumbo jet and a flock of seagulls. People are now saying that the reindeer in Spain was hit mainly by the plane.

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Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

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Erica is so sexy i want to hump her

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Knock knok ! Whos there? Buhu ! Buhu Who? Why are you crying?

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Whats Stupider than john? Nothing.. he's certifiably retarded

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A: make me a sandwich woman! B: your a sandwich.

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Why did the man have cold feet on his wedding day? The wedding was outside in the winter.

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What's worse than finding a snake in your apple? Finding a snake in your apple

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Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

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A black man walks into a Ku Klux Klan meeting.

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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