Why did the man name his boy "Sue?" He had bad eyesight and thought it was a girl.

Q: What did the teen mom put her newborn daughter up for? A: Adoption

Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

The grandfather's grandson said, "They charged me $10 just for a cup of coffee!" The grandfather said, "They charged me with bayonets."

A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To distract everyone from the Mexican.

dickdickvdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdick

Ed Milliband looks like an amphibian.

What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Hoocaust? 3 bee stings.

what did rishi say to jess ? GOOD ONE

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A hat.

Two elephants walk off of cliff.... BOOM BOOM!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he can make before the car hits him.

3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

Q: What's the best way to get a woman to stalk talking? A: Ask them nicely.

Q: Ask me how far have you gone with a girl? A: Mexico

Why was the woman on video chat? She was videochatting with her husband, he was out of town.

what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

A blond walks into an electronics store. Then she promptly walks out, as she got the wrong store.

A man walks into a bar. Later that night he comes home to an intervention and realizes he has a drinking has hurt him and his family.

what hurts more than a stab wound? two stab wounds

Roses are red Violets are blue I want to have sex But no one else wants to

why did the white man walking down the street have no hair? he had had cancer for 5 years prior.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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