A seal walks into a club.

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Why was the turkey killed? Because this particular turkey lived on a farm and a supermarket was paying the farmer a reasonable price to sell it.

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Why did the man tell the child to get into the van? They were late for a field trip.

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what looks like a sock and goes on peoples feet? A sock

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What's dark, scary, and full of puppies? My van. I lied about the puppies...

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black chicken. kfc

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I had a dream, then i died in it and now i'm dead but who cares, how are you ?

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What's worse than finding a hair in lasagna? An earthworm crawling into your ear and feeding on your intestines.

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Well many scientists have theorized that a giant meteor hit the earth causing the extinction of most living things. Also if your christian : Dinosaurs never existed, evolution is the devils work, science is not the answer to the world's problems. Darwin was a foolish man, and thats that.

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What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

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A man was eating a hamburger when a boy came up and took his hamburger. So the got up and went to the counter and orderd another hamburger

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

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how did the farmer die? his dog shot him

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Will nearis is here! Get it

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A coach and a priest walk into a boys and girls club and kick out all the girls.

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Emma Brown..I'd tap that shit Dylan xoxo

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Why was young Ferdinand sad? He had a very rough day. In the morning he woke up. To find a man in his room, and then the man raped him. Then, Ferdinand found out that his whole family was killed by an angry rat. Then, he realized his grandma took away all his Christmas presents and ate them. Then, the angry rat showed up and brutally murdered Ferdinand and ate him. The rat then burped up Ferdinand and his family's bones, and on Ferdinand's bone there was something wrong, indicating that Ferdinand had cancer and would've died the next day anyway. The rat then got cancer from Ferdinand, and it died. That is why Ferdinand was sad.

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A. Where was Sally during the boston marathon bombing? Q. Everywhere. www.facebook.com/wowedgy

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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What did the Dragonfly say to the Mosquito? Nothing. He ate it.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I suck at Poetry, show me your Tits.

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"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

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Proof reading

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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