Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

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A duck and a chicken walk into a bar. How improbable.

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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Barman says to a horse at the bar ' Are you sad or upset?' Horse says 'No' Barman says 'Well why the long face?' Horse says 'Because I'm a horse'

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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They say that laughter is the key to a long life. What's the key to a short life? Death.

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Why dont blind people go skydiving? Because they dont live when they hit the ground

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Thats the magic of Moral Man, I do not make people my bitches, they curl up and do it all for me. Moral: HEEEEEY BITCHEEEEEES! WAZZAAAAP!

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HEY.... HEY YOU..... YEA YOU! IM TALKING TO YOU!!! yolo

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Star Wars

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What do you do when you see someone from the kkk? Accept what you saw and move on with your day

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What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

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Q: Why is it sad that nobody was injured in a train crash? A: Because everyone died

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What's invisible and smells like carrots ? Rabbit Farts

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

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Q: What's the capital of Ohio A: O

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WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

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Why didn't Johnny have any food left? Because he ate it all.

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Why is it irrelevant whether someone is a twat or not? Love your neighbour.

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What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

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Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

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A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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