Q:Why did the kid drop his ice cream A:He was hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, that's why I'm asking you.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How did Jonny die We don't know he was never found

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

thumb_up thumb_down -62

okay so one time my dog was eating an octopus tail and i was all like...Bro! octopus are our friends dont eat them! then he was all like okay...so later i saw my goldfish eating a blue kangaroo and i was all like bro blue kangaroos are our friends dont eat them and she was all like okay.. so then i saw my sandwich eating itself and i was like bro...let me eat you instead! and it was like okay. then i saw a bear eating you so i was like bro....thats all i said before it ate both of us :( and thats the story of why i have 6 toes on my left buttcheek

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Regarding the "I will violate you, your children and your parent if you thumb me red" comment belo. I had a green thumb, I know because I gave it to myself because I am awesome... Now I got none... I person that this this, I cannot wait to X-mas where I will be violating them all, tell them, and as thus remind you that this was their Christmas present from you... Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: Yes, I am your neigbor... I cant wait for slot number 24 on my christmas calendar... There is a picture of you and your family... Yummy!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the Mexican overdose on to die. Nothing, he died of old age

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

thumb_up thumb_down +104

Your mom's so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and foods with nutritional value!!!! Oh burn!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

thumb_up thumb_down -21

If life throws you cars, you are probably on LSD.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Wanna hear a joke? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Face down, ass up. Thats the way I like to sleep

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Have you ever seen that gay clown in asda.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Despite their parents wishes, two teenagers under the age of 18 tried multiplying. Their answer was 27.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops