Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

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Why wasn't the woman cooking in the kitchen? Both her hands had been cut off in a severe conveyor belt accident.

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Person 1: What did the woman say when - Person 2: I know! It doesnt matter, shes a woman

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What do you call a mix between a beaver and a mammal? You can't mix beavers and mammals, and even if I had said a platypus that would not have been funny.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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How to make Ramen like a boss Step 1: get a promotion

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What's the color of a retarde dogs hair? 69

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Q) How many boring people does it take to screw in a light bulb? A) One

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Today is March 22.

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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What do you call a medical student who finishes last in his class? Doctor.

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Why does Snoop Dogg need an umbrella? Fo' Drizzle

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What's more greasy than grease? Kevin's hair

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A Mexican walks into an all white people bar. He then proceeds to buy rounds for everyone in the bar. Everyone thanks the mexican and everyone gets back to doing their own thing.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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You are driving a bus. At the first stop, 12 people get on and 7 get off At the second stop, 13 people get on and 11 get off At the third stop, 7 people get off the bus. You turn the bus off get out and go home.

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Where did Susie go after the bombing? Everywhere

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why did dicks dicks the dicks dicks? because you're gay and dicks

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What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Whatever his name happens to be.

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Whats worse than 911..? The plane ride there.

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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Why are black people scared of chainsaws? Because the chainsaws go run nigga nigga run.

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Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops