Why did the man not want to be a tree? Because he didn't want to.

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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why was the little boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face.

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I used to tell people: step on my foot on purpose and ill FUCKlNG BREAK YOURS! Then I Evolved.. friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Thumb me down or step on my foot if only on mistake, and I will break off both your legs and ram them up your ASS!

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What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

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Obamacare!

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A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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this site is an antijoke

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Knock Knock Who's there? St. Judes St.Judes who ? St.Judes Research Hospital calling. Give me money, I've got cancer kids dying

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What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

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What is black and beats up white people? a cop you racist!

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What's the difference between a black girl and a white girl? Nipple color

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What sinks quickly to the bottom of a river? Your dead parents.

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what the deference between a priest and acne well the acne doesn't come on the kids face tell hes thirteen

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What did the skeleton say to the man? Nothing.

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A blonde walks into a bar. Shes now in a coma.

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What did Stephen Hawking say to the prostitute? A several garbled and mostly inaudible comment that she could not understand.

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What is the difference between a pizza and ten dead babies? I dont have a pizza in my oven.

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Why do black people log onto blackpeoplemeet.com? To meet black people.

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Susie has Autism

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Which is better; having a billion dollars or a trillion dollars? Trick Question, you aren't that rich.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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