You come home and find your family dead. What do you do? Take a picture, post it on facebook

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Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

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Q.why'd the monkey fall out of the tree A. because he was dead.

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I went to the zoo the other day there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu. By Nathan Luque CARROTS!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by a car. I lied about him crossing the road.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "What will it be tonight?" He then promptly remembers he is on anti-joke.co but is too late to react. The horse has already shit on the floor. This is the fifth time this week that this has happened.

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A man with Alzheimers favorite thing to read is the first page of the antijoke book

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf which impairs the ability to register sights and sounds necessary to operate an automobile.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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There are no stupid Questions just stupid people

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

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What do you call a black man that flies a plane? A pilot you racist bastard!

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Why did the kid fall off the bike? Because he was paraplegic.

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So this old redneck is sitting on his porch when he sees this boy walking down the road and hollers "What you got there boy?" "Chicken wire." "What you gonna do with that?" "Gonna catch me some chickens." The old guy thought: Dumb boy. You can't catch no chickens with chicken wire. Later that evening he sees the same boy walking with a bunch of chickens. The next day he sees the same boy walking with duct tape. "What you got there boy?" "Duct tape" The boy replies. "Gonna catch me some ducks." The old man leaned back and thought. "Dumb boy, you can't catch ducks with duct tape." Later that evening he sees the boy walking with a bunch of ducks. The next day he sees the same boy and hollers: "What you got there boy?" "I got me some pussy willow." The old man hollers: "Hold on, let me get my hat."

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(joker) Do you like fishsticks? (recipient) "No" (any response from the joker at this point qualifies as anti joke)

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01010010001010010100100101001001010010100100100100100100100100100100100100010010101010101010101011010101010110010101010 Dolphin

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In Soviet Russia, life was very hard due to the failing economy and oppressive government.

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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Start by getting your fucking ass off this site and get me the fucking money asap yourself! And your contact information! Fuck your "eye for an eye" piece of shit example, I want redemption! If I am to live with self respect after losing a FUCKING EYEBALL! I demand that you lose EVERYTHING YOU HOLD DEAR! YOU FUCKING QUEER HYPOCRITE! And I am not asking that you take away everything, I will take everything you hold dear away from you myself! Then again, why do that when I can get straight to the source and break your spine, and that is just the first step to making you wish you where dead! That you end up begging me for THE SWEET MERCY OF DEATH! Listen, if you want to talk, lets talk, if you claim to be so fucking powerful get on a goddamn jet and get over here yourself, no goons, no "shadows", no "followers" of "your order" when you present it, and "our order" when YOU FUCK UP! Only then will I "listen to reason", it is only reasonable you come out of your fucking hiding place and face me! I wont fight you, I wont kill you, but you better get your fucking face over here yourself.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy so heres my number actually is dolan

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I brought a parachute as carry on luggage, I was pulled aside at security and missed my flight.

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Yeah, me too. The car just ran straight through the stoplight and it was all over...

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What did the man say when he saw an orange? That's not a banana.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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