Me: Ask me if i'm a truck. You: Are you a truck? Me: No.

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I had a date. She was a pegasister. Since MLP was magical, I disappeared.

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Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? Their religion.

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Facebook How i met my mother

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What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

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bitches be crafty.

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Bill: Did you hear someone said you sounded like an owl? Dave: Who?

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How many beavers can you fit in one paddling pool? None; it's probably very dangerous trying

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My cousins so stupid she makes straight A's

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A boy tells his friend a 9/11 joke. The boy's friend says "Don't joke about 9/11, my dad died in it." "I'm sorry I didn't know.", responds the boy. "Yeah, that's the last plane he ever flew"

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What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

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Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, everything is grey, i'm a dog.

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What did the chair say when someone sat on it? Nothing. The person's butt covered the chair's mouth.

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed!" The 14 year old yells back "Excuse me? Do you see a fvcking pickaxe?"

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An iguana walks out of a bar

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That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

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Why couldnt the dog bark? The dog didnt exist.

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What did the one horse say to the other. Nothing because horses can't talk.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

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What was the mentally challenged kids first word? He was retarded so it wasn't a word.

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do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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