I popped my head over my sexy neighbour's fence today to see her lying in her bikini. "Wow, you're gorgeous!" I burst out, "I hope you know how to do CPR." "Why?" she asked with a giggle, "Because I've taken your breath away?" "No," I replied. "I've just run your son over out front."

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Because she had no arms!

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, the Krusty Krab is a fictional place, and therefore does not exist.

A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

Why wasnt the black man entitled to a social welfare cheque? Because he made quite good money at a nearby hospital, where he worked as a doctor

what do u call a long dik gay guy Gay Dickerson

Whats worse than dying? Nothing.....?

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

My Japanese girlfriend just broke up with me. It's okay, there's more of them in the sea.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Roses are red Viloets are unicorns this? doesn't make sense Refridgeator

Why do all the Republicans hate Obama? He's a Democrat.

You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

A woman leaves the kitchen.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

Man one: Why does the moon look like a face? Man two: I don't know, why? Man one: I don't know either, that's why i asked....

Dear 6, Please stop hitting on me, I heard you've done some pretty dirty stuff with 9. Sincerely, 7

whats a cross between michael jackson and arnold shwarzanegga? Michaelwasanigga

Why did the dog get arrested? He didn't the people responsible for causing the dog fight got arrested for animal abuse.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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