A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's funnier than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans.

thumb_up thumb_down

How to you scare a paraplegic? Point a gun at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How did the black man manage to get that 42 inch TV? He had been working a lot of overtime at work to try and treat his wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

No thank you, I don't like violence

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Crowded elevator smell different to midget-Confucius say.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was the women out of the kitchen? She felt the desire to relax after a day of work...

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being black

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What has hands but cannot feel? A sociopath; due to his or her mental health condition they are incapable of feeling true emotion.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had Leukemia

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What is red, and bucket shaped? A red bucket.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

BOOBIES!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Doris fall down the stairs? Because she was a stupid, uncoordinated old hag with no control over her bladder.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the man buy fruits at the store? Because they were available, on sale, and the man was hungry, so he wanted to eat fruit at that time, he then got into his car, but thought to himself first, "I should unlock my car so I can open the door," so he does so, and sits in the drivers seat eating his fruit, he drives off to his home, arrives safely, and greets his family as he enters the house, then they sit down, eat dinner, and go to sleep, the next day, the man goes to the store, and buys vegetables

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Japanese study of the stereotypical American man: Murica: Come on come on! Japanese: Uh yes? *walks toward American* Murica: Are you okay?! Japanese: Well yes I am doi.. Murica: BUSTER WOLF *Punches Japanese which smacks into the ground critically wounded. Murican: OKAAAAAAAAAAAY! *throws dirty trucker cap at Japanese man and leaves.* BEWARE OF THE TYPICAL AMERICAN! Study 2 American man, taught Japanese Discipline: Japanese: Herrow Mr.Educated American *bows* "Japanesed Murican": *Fighting Pose* " I SHALL STAIN MY HANDS, WITH YOUR BLOOD!" *Japanese people run away* Experiment fail. BEWARE EXTREMELY OF AMERICAN MAN! Nero: Nuking Japan probably created a few controversies and wrong stereotypes... After visiting the US several times, I find these manners to be of the Texan stereotype though... Educated Murican: PREDICTABO!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? black people have more melanin in their skin causing it to pigment and turn black

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Anal

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red. Violets are blue. These are facts. Good day.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call it when a dead man has his wallet stolen? Rob Zombie.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

dont insult justin bieber, she has feelings too!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is funnier than onion gravy? Mushroom gravy.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What did ine sweaty arab man say to the other sweaty arab man? A: "I'm sweaty"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops