What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

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What did the dog say to his own poop? You gonna eat that?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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9/11

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My mum is called Steve

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Who spends too much time on Anti-Joke? ...

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Whats funnier than 24? 25

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Three blind men walk into a bar, and, no... wait, sorry just one; so one blind man walked into a bar, and... uh, okay, so it was actually more of a small post. This is pretty much just a plausible, yet unfortunate event. My bad.

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Why did the car's airbag go off? He hit a boy eating his ice cream

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't know where I am, I'm blind.

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A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

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whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

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At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

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what did the older brother do? put on a joke on anti jokes what did the younger brother do ? give it a minus score what did the older brother do ? tell him and then played gears of war 2 (they got gears 3 but wanted to go bakc in time, not like michael J fox in a car with a crazy doctor but as in play an old game)

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Police. She told me she was nineteen.

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*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

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Why is this joke funny It isn't

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny cuase the robot had no arms.

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What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

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Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

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What did the atheist say to the jew. Well first they had a long discussion about religion and the jew was actually made an atheist. Truly the work of God.

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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