Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

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What did the atheist say when he was in the church? The eulogy for his best friend.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen. You are going to go to jail.

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What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

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What's the difference between a car tyre and 365 used condoms? One is a Goodyear. The others a fucking great year!!! San2

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Two chemists walk into a bar. The first one says "I'll have some H2O." The second one then says "I'll have some H2O too." Both chemists live as no bartender is irresponsible enough to serve liquid hydrogen peroxide in a public bar.

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Why can't humans fly? Because there is simply no natural way of achieving lift with the bodies that we have. We must use other means to become airborne such as planes and hot air balloons.

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Rebecca Black.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls don't talk.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

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What has four wheels and flies? A pile of poop that's on four wheels.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Mike Mike who? Mike who you just called and told to come over Oh ok, come in

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Can I touch it?

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So much oil was spilled into the ocean that it is killing animals.

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are you from hawaii? because your the only ten I see

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How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? Four, one to take the light bulb out, one to put a new in, one to hold the ladder, and one to hold the guy holding the ladder

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your mom is so ugly when she entered an ugly contest they said... ok

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Q. Where do polar bears vote? A. The North Poll

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What do you call a black man with a gun? A police officer.

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I like my women like I like my coffee, without a dick

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How many jews died in a gas chamber? None because the holocaust is a myth.

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The next sentence is true. The last sentence was a lie.

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Why did the man put his money in the freezer? Perhaps he didn't believe in banks.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? .The Police The Police who? ..The Police The Police who? ...The Police The Police who? ....The Police The Police who? .....The Police The Police who? ......The Police The Police who? .......The Police The Police who? ........The Police The Police who? .........The Police The Police who? ..........The Police The Police who? Forget this. *Gunshot*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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