What did I eat for my breakfast? My breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what did the blind orphan with no legs get for christmas? cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Girl: I love you in a platonic way Guy: ... Is that some kind of fat joke!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Tin is a chemical element with symbol Sn (for Latin: stannum) and atomic number 50. It is a main group metal in group 14 of the periodic table. Tin shows chemical similarity to both neighboring group-14 elements, germanium and lead, It is also the material Aodhan's house is made from.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the Asian eat so much rice? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's big, white, and red all over? A refrigerator that happened to fall on a small child.

thumb_up thumb_down

There were once three bears who lived in a cottage in the forest. They left to go to the market one day. While they were gone a blonde girl walked into their cabin. Meanwhile at the market, everyone was freaking out that there were bears there.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why didn't Joe want to stand up? Because he had no legs!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats the same about a red crayon and a blue crayon? there both the same color except for the blue one

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what ya call e dong withb eyes peeneyes

thumb_up thumb_down +22

I like my woman like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A guy walks into a bar. I didn't see anything else.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Mooses

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do u call it when a Jamaican gets angrey? Nothing, at all. Just an angrey person

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you get when you cross the motorway with a lottery ticket? You get knocked down and killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

...........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................a gay baby was just born.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Heil Hitler!!!!!! Why thankyou General Himmler. Would you care to join me for supper this evening?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops