doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

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Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? It isn't numbers are not sentiment objects therefore incapable of feeling fear

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What happened to the asian when he took viagra? He got an erection.

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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Knock, Knock Who's There

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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When the clock strikes the bell at elephantasourous during my erectionn i screw myself CC

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why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

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They see me trollin' They hatin'...

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Orange!" "Oranges can't speak, who is this really?" "Your neighbor Jake, can I borrow your lawn mower?" "Sure, let me go to the garage and get it for you."

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What's red and has wheels? A red car

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Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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What's large, green, and pissed off? The dumpster out back

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Why was the woman so hot? she was on fire

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what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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Dad: "When I was your age, I had to walk outside to catch the school bus. If it snowed heavily the night before, school was canceled."

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Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

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I dont hate you Lets just say if you were on fire and i had water id drink it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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