What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

Why are rich guys gay? Because they can afford to be

Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

Women's Rights

What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

What did Michael Jackson get for Christmas? Nothing he's dead

How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

Snapple fact #572: You're a terrible person.

Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

What do you call a black guy who sells drugs? a pharmacist

how many jews can you fit into a car 5, two in the front three in the back

what was the biggest game of hide and seek? World War II and the Jews won

How do you kill off a zombie apocalypse? Laser vision

A guy walked into a bar. He got drunk. He hit a small child with his Suburu and was charged with a DUI.

What do you call a dead child? The product of a car crash

Why did Bob stop at the light? Because it was red and not doing so would be illegal.

I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

Justin beiber..

Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

What did they gay chicken say to the straight chicken? .... nothing, chickens dont speek.

Robin, get in the car, please.

why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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