How do you stop a baby alien from crying? Watch what its mother does to soothe it and then try and copy that.

why did the man hop everywhere? He only had one leg

What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

NASCAR

Invisible Television.

Knock knock. Stop making puns at my door!

What did the black man say to the latino man? Nothing he was far to busy trying to get a cab to his office meeting for his board of directors do not appreciate tardiness

how do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

So two cannibals are eating a clown. Cannibal one: Does this taste funny to you? Cannibal two: Considering that this man was a clown he must have been in poverty so he resulted to being an alcoholic and maybe over dosed on over the counter drugs. Cannibal one: Thank you for that reasonable answer.

What's red, yellow, and full of diabetes? Mcdonalds

No, Trinidad.

What is the best invention ever? Taking a crap reverse. So you can enjoy a nice bowl of aids.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9. Why was 7 afraid of 9? Because 9 was black.

Who did the Vampire bite? No one because vampires aren't real.

roses are grey violets are grey im colorblind but your face is still black!!!

why does the guy jack off to black on black porn? because he's black

Why did your ears get blasted with sound? You never turned the volume down..

What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

Why did the girl fall out of the tree? Because she had no arms

Q: What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? A: A set of Legos

Hey man how was the trip to Hiroshima? Great it blew my mind!! And how was Nagasaki ? It was the bomb!!

Whats worse than being a student? Being raped.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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