What happens when you catch a cold? You sneeze whenever you stand up.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks heavily and dies of alcohol poisoning.

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homework

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whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

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Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21

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Did you know that Obama wasn't born in the United States*? *the contiguous United States

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Johnny: One day dad i will be tall like you! (Later that day johnny was found dead in a garbage bag)

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy plus size clothes because small size clothes would be inappropriate for her to wear.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor"

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Kobe Bryant passing the ball

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Clouds are white. Thank God I am too.

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What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

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How do you punish Helen Keller? By grounding her.

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what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

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Your mom is so nice.

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What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

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Justin Bieber.

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Why did the chicken cr-VAGINA!!!!!!!!!!! sorry, tourettes.

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Why did the man need new glasses? He was thrown off a bridge by a leprechaun.

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James Patrick Campbell

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I stole all your jokes, I stole this one too.

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What happened to the man who killed his family? Rape.

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a man walk into a bakery, he sais... may i have a loaf of bread....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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