What's blue, cold and makes people cry? A dead baby

knock knock. Whos there? YELLOW PEOPLE

what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

why did the blond sop at a red light? because it was red.

Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

-I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

person 1:Dude, look at the news person 2:Yea man, its D ick Cheney person 1: what a d ick head

Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? Vegeta got rid of the scouter because a monocle built for displaying a person's physical abilities in numbers is extremely farfetched and he didn't want to be a part of a super race of supreme beings that still relied on such ridiculous antics

What's black and white and red all over? A chess board; I lied about the "red all over" part.

How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

What do you call a pig standing on its back legs? Yo mama

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

A Guy walks into a bar Ouch

You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

why was their a child on the sun? There wasn't he would be incinerated

Every 5 seconds a child dies in Somalia. Good news is there are 4 second intervals when a child isn't dying in Somalia. I say kill them all

How are friends and trees alike? They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

Simba was moving slow,so I told him to MUFASA!!!

How much does a polar bear weight? The average male polar bear weights about 1500 lbs (680 kg)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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