A bear walks in a restaurant and asks for a table for one. Meanwhile, everyone else in the restaurant is freaking out because there is a bear in there

whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

A chicken cross's the road it dies when a car runs it over

A black man, a jew, and an atheist are on a boat. Suddenly the boat started sinking. A mermaid would only save two of them. who do did she save? Mermaids don't exist. The all died. They were my friends.

knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

What did the Muslim have under his hood of his car? A V-8 engine.

BWAT

AND

What is brown and salty? A pretzel.

How do you keep a mexican from drowning? Take your foot off the back of his head.

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin after being attacked by a man with a mace.

What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

Knock knock ... Knock knock ... Little did the man knocking at the door know that the kid was told not to answer the door when he was home alone, so the kid was hiding

What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

Whats the difference between a truck full of babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

Penis.

What was wrong with the tomato? Nothing.

what starts with P and ends with u-b-e-s? Paul, can you brang me some priangles and the rest of my Rubik's cubes?

Two corpses weigh in the wind. One is called Jones.

One morning a guilty man reluctantly told his wife he was having an affair. After a long awkward silence they were then abducted by aliens.

how do you kill a baby? introduce it to alice cooper

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

What do you call a Black Comedian? Funny, You Racist.

Man walks into a bar and goes, "Ouch!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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