What's the difference between white and black? White is Caucasian and black is African-American.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why didn't the woman believe in God? Her own personal beliefs.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

A man walks in to a bar. He was hospitalized and died later that day.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

red is black green is black i'm batman i'm white,

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did little Timmy fall down? Because he was shot in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. The man was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral service.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Is this the Krusty Krab? Actually it is,how may i help you?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a dog? A cat. What do you call a cat? A banana.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: Why was the bacteria afraid of the sanitizer? A: Because hand sanitizers are made up of ethyl alcohol, inactive additives such as water, other alcohols and fragrances. Ethyl alcohol is the active ingredient in hand sanitizer and is designed to kill germs.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

OMG this actually works! 1. Hold your breath for 5 minutes 2. Die

thumb_up thumb_down -5

In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Hey guess what? What? You're a Tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's brown and sticky? A stick. But if you answered poop you aren't wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Man: Knock knock Man 2: who's there Alzheimer's patient: to get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Cool Brian

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What hurts people but doesn't? Child Birth. -Dave Papile

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What do you call a duck with a mustache? A duck with a mustache.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What happened to to dyslexic giraffe that tripped over a brick. It got back up.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

When life gives you: High Fructose Corn Syrup,Citric Acid, Ascorbic Acid,Maltodextrin, Sodium Acid Phosphate, Magnesium Oxide, Calcium Fumarate, Yellow 5, Tocopherol, and less than 2% natural flavours... Make lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows. Chickens aren't capable of knowing why they do things.

thumb_up thumb_down +105

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops