Why did the girl stop running? Because she is in a wheelchair and will never walk again

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Batman and Superman switched sidekicks. Superman didn't want Robin.

Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

whats funner than nailing a baby to a wall, ripping it off

So there were these three guys on a plane, one with a ruptured hernia, one with a stomach infection and one with a raging case of gingivitis. Half way through the flight the pilot said, "unfortunately we will not it make to our destination... we are crashing." The three men then went to get the parachutes. they then say that there was only two. the man with the ruptured hernia picked one up and threw it out the door and pushed out the guy with the stomach infection. The guy with the raging case of gingivitis said, "why did you do that... we could have used that parachute!" the man with the ruptured hernia responded, "taco." and jumped out of the plane. the pilot then goes on the intercom and says," sorry. false alarm. we will not be crashing, please enjoy the rest of your flight."

2 doctors are talking to each other: -Dead? -Dead.

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

What's 9 plus 10? 19

A black man, a Rabbi, a circus clown, a soldier and the Pope all walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

What doesn't kill you and doesn't make you stronger? Aids

Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

What can Harry Potter NOT see with his glasses? His parents...alive.

What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The Hollocaust. What's worse than the Hollocaust? 3 bee stings.

What did the blonde do when she missed bus 40? She waited 30 minutes for it to come back around again.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because a tree fell on her. Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally...

How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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