How did the black guy survive from drowning? Years of Swimming lessons at his local YMCA

why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

Where's my tractor?

What did the mother get at the grocery store? Food.

A woman gets home from bying tampons to use later in the month. She walks into the house and sees a heart box with a note from her husband of 5 years. The note reads: Roses are red - violets are blue - Fudge Is Sweet - Heres some Fudge...........She then puts the note down, eats the fudge, and has diarrhea a few hours later. The husband comes home and feels bad because he forgot that fudge upsets his wife's stomach. Later that night the wife asks her husband to have anal sex with her. The husband agrees but later regrets his action since his dick is now discolored and smells of shit..........Two days later the family dog dies. The wife and husband mourn. I like cheese

Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

do you wanna hear a joke about pizza? sure. naw,its too cheesy

How do you stop a black man from drowning? Take your fott off his head.

So I went to an audition, my friend said "break a leg" And then I did

what is the hardest part of eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

You know what they call men who make kitchen jokes? Single.

Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

bum sex lol

Yo momma's so ugly that she could not find another partner after the tragic death of your father

Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

Once upon of time there was a chicken. It crossed the road and everybody made fun of him. The End

whats blue and fluffy ? Blue fluff

This is a joke.

What do you do when life gives you lemons? Make some fucking lemonade.

There are two muffins in a oven, the first muffin is chocolate chip and the second muffin is blueberry.

What's the difference between a black preist and a white priest? the color of their skin.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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