What is the secret to winning football games? Score the most points.

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What happens to a warehouse on a full moon? Nothing

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The Duck walks up to the lemonade stand and says to the man running the stand...Hey bum bum bum....How much is the lemonade

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Why couldn't the kid get into the pirate movie? Tickets were sold out.

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What other than water contains H2O? The condensation reaction between two alpha glucose molecules to form Maltose.

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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a dyslexic man walked into a bar, ordered a beer, and no one was aware of his affliction

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Whats Big, Brown, and smells like Horse Crap? Horse Crap

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Q: What faster than a black man with a t.v A: A jew with a coupon

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating in mid air? Drop It Niggher!

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What happened to boy who fell down the stairs? He died. What happened to the girl who fell down the same stairs? The boy who fell down the stairs hit her down the stairs too and they both died What happened to the man fell down these very same stairs? He got peer pressure and committed suicide.

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A girl walks into a supermarket. She picks up a banana, a can of soup, and a loaf of bread. She then walks up to the cash register to pay. The cashier looks at her and the items she has and says, "I can tell you're single." She smiles and responds, "How do you know that?" He says, "Because you're ugly."

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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What did the dog say to the cat? "Bark."

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Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

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what do you call and man that has a twitch every time someone say tissue broken arm, leg, hand, collar bone and there iphone? A mentally and physically demented man that needs serious help from a psychotherapist otherwise matter would get increasingly worse

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered 6 offender. And there was nothing funny about that.

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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Knock, knock. Come in!

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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Why did Martin go to school with no pants on? Because he had no legs.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? He was on his way home from work and saw some youths loitering on the street corner and thought it best to avoid them and therefore any possible confrontation. He would also appreciate it if you would call him something along the lines of Bravery impaired instead of a chicken as he finds it offensive and doesn't fully understand the avian reference to his lack of confidence.

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Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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