How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Well babies don't have the strength or coordination to hold a paint brush, so you may need to call some painters.

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What do you call postman pat when he is retired? Pat.

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If your flying upstream in a kayak and a wheel flys off, how many pancakes can fit into a dog house? None, because ice-cream is alergic to frogs!

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your TV

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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Why do the cangaroos are weird? cause they have testicles in front and penis back, is real!

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knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

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Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

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a man gets raped. -teagan doherty-

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What happened to the woman who was raped? She was mentally scarred for life and finds it hard to trust men.

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a kangaroo walks in to a bar and sits down. Kangaroo's live in Auustralia

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Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

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Why did the dog cross the road? He didn't, he got run over

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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What's black, white, has green stripes and smells like eggs? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

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I hate when Harry Potter showers in my Potatoes....

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A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

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Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with abnormal sized genitalia.

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What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

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why was the asian kid found dead? he failed an examen

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" asks the bartender. "I'm a horse, it's genetic." replied the horse, confused at the bartender's infantile understanding of evolution and other species.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? Nothing, they're both horses

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan? Their last names.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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