Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No, he hasn't either

Canadians

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm colorblind.

A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

Life is like a box of chocolates! It sucks if you have diabetes

2 + 2 = fish

What does a cupcake get for Christmas? A fat kid.

What is less funny than a clown? Another clown ... but with fewer limbs.

Why don't chicken wear underwear? Because their peckers are on their face

my computer teacher just left the room. teehee JLR

Why was the dwarf nicknamed The Anaconda? Because everybody loves a bit of irony.

How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

A pirate walks into a bar with a wheel on his crotch, and the bartender says, "What's that?" and the pirate says, "A deadly tumor."

What did the black person say to the other black person? Im really white, I just want to fell what its like to be black.

a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? their friend.

Once, a woman told her son to be a peach and fetch some sugar. Little did she know that a genie heard her. The next day, she was horrified to find her son gone and a peach in his bed.

What did the man say ti the other man? Hi

What do you call a Mexican with a rubber toe? Rober-to. What do you call a black guy with a big toe? Tobe Bryant

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person if the Jewish religion and a pizza is a type of food.

what do you call a man who likes other men? A fag

what is another way to say tree? A big stick with leaves

Not from my wife if that is what you think, but its best people dont know who she is, because you know... A guy that gets many ladies = A playa. A girl that lets his guy do that, well, my wife feels safe about her husband (I am dead honest), but I cant expect people to suddenly go "oh yeah, his wife is totally cool and secure about it all, rather than an insecure idiot that allows him to sleep around like the dog he is) Strictly spoken, I am no dog, women say all men are pigs, but no woman settles for a boy, so that makes me a pig.

What Do You Call A Man On Land With No Arms And Legs? Useless

Yo Mama is so dumb, that she scored significantly below average on the SAT's.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...