Why was everyone screaming bloody murder? Their home team won

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats worse than finding a worm in your penis having your wife bite of your penis and die from an infecction

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the man do when it was raining pineapples? He got a chainsaw and went on a killing spree against his neighbors family.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the ginger say to god? Nothing it has no soul

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why didn't the restaurant serve the black man? He hadn't ordered anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

thumb_up thumb_down

A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why doe this filthy bitch take big dildos inside himself? Because he is gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did little Robbie get for Christmas? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I am a real homosexual

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you do if you are locked inside a car with a baseball bat? Unlock the car

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

GIVE

thumb_up thumb_down -111

Why did the man get a penis Becuse he was gay Add on He died

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

thumb_up thumb_down +61

What's purple, green, and orange? Dead baby with slashed floaties. What's black, purple, and orange? Same baby two weeks later.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you scare a Jew Hold your lighter up and blow out the flame and I've toward him real slowly and see how much drama he'll cause

thumb_up thumb_down -22

how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock, knock Who's there? Lemon Lemon who? Lemon know if you want me to say apple again

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

thumb_up thumb_down +41

i hate you.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops