why did the little boy fall down?? Because a terrorist shot him

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: you wanna hear a joke? A: yeah sure. Q: well im not gnna.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the little girl drop her school books? A kid jacked her in the head with a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face", the horse said nothing; because it is a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Hickory Dickory Dock. 2 mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one.. and the second one got away with major injuries, dying in a hospital three days later. The clock is now serving its 8th year in jail out of 25 years, and does not regret anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Who needs god when coffee is cheaper

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Hey, you are competitive, but let me have the last word here and you will like it. If you keep poking your nose constantly, the effect will actually overlap, making it stronger and stronger, by all means though, make sure you keep some nose working alright?

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Who was the best Call of Duty World at War Player? A: Hitler he had 6 million kills and only 1 death

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red. I have OCD. That rose IS red right.. Let me check again.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Bannana man do do do do do ect.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why is kool-aid so sweet? Because it contains sugar

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Screwing in a lightbulb is a simple, menial task, and the fact that the man was a Jew is irrelevant.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What's the difference between between basketballs and babies? A: I don't shoot basketballs.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the wife scream when she saw her husband? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both can fly except for the mole

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops