what is big and green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A snooker table

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Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

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Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

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What did the tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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How did the blond know that you like her? You said,"Baby, I like you"

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How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

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roses are red orchids are black I like you best when you lye on your back

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It is so hot out here, that it could melt an ice cube that was once in the freezer!

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Fuzzy-wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy-wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy-wuzzy died of cancer.

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Leave her alone...

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so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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What's behind Chuck Norris' beard? His chin

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A tightly dressed woman walks up to a man and asks if he wants a good time they go out for dinner and have a lot in common and agree to meet again in the near future

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What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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how do you know your at a gay picnic. the hotdogs smell like shit.

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A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Ask the starving African.

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What's the easiest way to become President? Have a background in politics and a catchy campaign slogan that voting Americans can relate to.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, but if the ladder is shaky, you might need another to hold it up.

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Did you know every 46 seconds somebody commits suicide Thumbs up for pancakes!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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