what do you tell a woman with one black eye? "sorry about that wild ball, you played a fantastic softball game otherwise"

What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

Why did the chicken cross the road...

What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

What did the kid with cancer get for his birthday? Nothing he didnt make it that far

Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

The horse walks into the bar and the bartender says, "why the long face?" the horse looks at him and says, "my wife just died."

how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

Why do Mexican's wear pointy shoes? Because its part of their culture and is used as a sign of dignity when dancing to tribal music

What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

What did the rock say to the tree. It didn't say anything, rocks don't talk.

what did the orphan say to the adults wanting to adopt him? i hope u will provide well living conditions because i have lost both of my parents and am forced to live off one meal a day

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

Daniel Textor can suck a gooch he's such a F - A - GGGGG!! Let's beat him up at lunch.

Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

What do you call a car that doesn't work? Broken.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What's the number 1 tip to burning stomach fat? Lighting yourself on fire.

Want to hear a joke? Women's rights

Why could the black man not fall asleep? The gunshots outside his home in Compton constantly awoke him

Zach Barlow

What do dogs call gaseous exchange? Woof!!

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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