I learned a new party trick over the weekend; I swallow a piece of string and it comes out my other end tied! I shit you knot.

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I said I read te terms of service. I didnt

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What did Aaron Pfeifer say to Zach Faller ? Yee

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What did the baby say to the man? Babies can't talk ,the baby did not say anythingto the man!

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Why didn't the Orphan finish his lemonade. His legs got chopped off.

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Roses are multicoloured Violets are multicoloured Mushrooms are great

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Why was the man with cancer bald? He wanted to tan his scalp.

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Why is there no Asprin in the rainforest? Because it's financially viable to sell pharmesuticals in the vast, unpopulated rainforest.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game.

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A man is about to rape a girl. Before penetration he carefully and correctly applies a condom as he practices safe sex and is not yet ready to father a child.

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why does jake have so many guns? hes compensating

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

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How many pancakes does it take to fill up a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones.

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what did the african boy get for christmas? what does his ethnicity or his place of origin have anything to do with what he gets for christmas

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

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what would Jesus do? Get crucified and die.

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What's black white and red all over A Nun after being pushed down the stairs

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on a stool? Ask them kindly to do so. Their sexual orientation is of little to no importance in this situation.

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What do you do when a man in a corner offers you candy? You walk away.

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Did you hear about Big Chief Running Water? Probably not. Indoor plumbing was invented after Europeans murdered his ancestors.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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