What's moist wet and I put my finger in it? My nose.

I pooped my pants

What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

why did the small child drop his icecream? he was hit by a bus

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse said nothing because it doesn't understand human language.

Left. That one direction...

Whats the different between a black man and white man...... the different levels melanin in the skin that results in pigment

What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Leukemia

Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

Whats Barack Obama's favorite number ? 7

what did one barstool say to the other what theres a butt on me

What is in your backyard and is stalking you? Corn

John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

Your mom is so fat That the salesman advised her not to buy the tight dress

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted a car to kill him so he can get to the other side with his wife and son. In other news,I had a very nice chicken cutlet and scrambled egg dinner.

Itookasipasoda

What happened to boy who fell down the stairs? He died. What happened to the girl who fell down the same stairs? The boy who fell down the stairs hit her down the stairs too and they both died What happened to the man fell down these very same stairs? He got peer pressure and committed suicide.

I was walking through the woods the other day when I heard a rustle in the bushes... So I went over and said, "Russell, What are you doing in the bushes?"

Q: what do you call a muslim driving a plane? I don't know A: 9/11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being raped by a giant scorpion

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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