A woman gets home from bying tampons to use later in the month. She walks into the house and sees a heart box with a note from her husband of 5 years. The note reads: Roses are red - violets are blue - Fudge Is Sweet - Heres some Fudge...........She then puts the note down, eats the fudge, and has diarrhea a few hours later. The husband comes home and feels bad because he forgot that fudge upsets his wife's stomach. Later that night the wife asks her husband to have anal sex with her. The husband agrees but later regrets his action since his dick is now discolored and smells of shit..........Two days later the family dog dies. The wife and husband mourn. I like cheese

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YOU

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silver bullet?

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he needed to get to the other side and he was using a crosswalk

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

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What's sadder than a dead baby? Any dead adult, considering how much more they've contributed to society.

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What do you call a black man? A normal human being

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Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit halfway by a car.

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Q: Why was Luigi sad? A: Because he entered the Twilight Zone.

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Go online. why? To get a quote. why? To save money. why? Because we said so! Parenting can be hard. See how easy it is to save with GEICO.

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To the person who wrote the dislike joke: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAH GOOD FAIL!

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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A man walked into a haunted house and screamed. He had stepped on a nail.

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So there is a white guy and a jewish guy walking, they find a penny on the ground who takes it? The white guy because he is in debt.

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A dislexic man walks into a bra. He then proceeds to enjoy the breasts that he has stumbled upon.p

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A man walks into a bar. "Excuse me sir," he asks, "may I have a beer?" "No," says the bartender.

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An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

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What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

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Whats funny about ISIS? Nothing, you asshole, its terrifying.

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Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom

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Why did the mother stop breastfeeding her son? Because he was twenty five.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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