There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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Why couldnt the kid see the pirate movie? Because he didn't have eyes.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why was ticklish Tom not ticklish anymore? A: he got hit by a train

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Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? .......................................................................................................................................... SEVEN EIGHT NINE!!!!!

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Knock knock Who's there? Batman Batman who? Because he was

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

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Yo mama so fat she has more chins than the Chinese phone book. A.V.T was here Fred.

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When life gives you limes....... first you have some problem and second u throw them at people

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Why did the black guy stop his car? There was a stop sign

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Why wouldn't Helen Keller be able to drive if she was alive today? She would be inside her coffin not knowing how to get out

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A family of aristocrats walks into a talent agency and shows their performance. The talent agent asks: "How do you call yourselves?" They say: "The Aristocrats", "because that's what we are; Aristocrats."

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Whats funnier than throwing a baby off the top of a building? The sound it makes when it hits the ground.

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A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

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roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

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Why did the man's legs start shaking when he saw the attractive women? There was an earthquake

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What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

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So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

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8=>

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

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Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

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What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They're both Tom Cruise.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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