Why was the Chinese man so sad? He's Asian.

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What did the girl with no eyes say? I can not see.

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Its linked with the process of extracting uranium isotopes, but lets change the subject, with that said, I hope you can help me with some management advice such as the one you gave me, I will of course pay you.

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a kangaroo? An irrelevant punchline.

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The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

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what's worse than the holocaust? when starbucks puts whip cream in my hot chocolate and I didn't ask for it. created by KA

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How do u make a plumer cry? You kill his family!

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent at 6 o'clock at night

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Why didnt the black man run the marathon? He was in jail

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I didn't use protection So here's your baby

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get him a ladder and help him down.

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When's the best time to go to the dentist? When you have an appointment.

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Q: what did humoure say to lie A: u must be tellin a lie

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how do you french braid? ask a french dude to braid your hair DUHH

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Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

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How do you fall off a building... JUMP.

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"....did he fire six shots or only five....." It doesn't really matter, considering he will die of blood loss soon

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why did jimmy loose the bike race. because he never entered.

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How do you know it's a bad day? When your brain does not release a high enough level of seratonin.

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whats funnier than 24? 25

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Chuck Norris doesn't shave.

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Knock, Knock. Come In.

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When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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