Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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Whats the difference between 10 dead babies and 8 dead babies? 2 dead babies.

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A drunkard stumbles into the bar. Now he's got thousand's of dollars in medical bills.

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The 80's

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Whats orange and looks like an orange? An orange.

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What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A good start

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your mum

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

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wat did the candle say to the lighter? nothing candles cant speak because they are inamimate objects, even so i think a candle would just scream anyway, would you buy a screaming candle?

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Why do black guys have brown skin ? Because there born that way

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jelly is a clear or translucent fruit spread made from sweetened fruit juice, and set using naturally occurring pectin. Jam contains both fruit juice and pieces of fruit.

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Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

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Knock Knock. F uck off.

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Q: Holy do you get a nun pregnant? A: You have sexual intercourse with her, and have an orgasm inside her body. Also, in vitro fertilization is a viable, albeit expensive, alternative for couples who have difficulty conceiving by standard intercourse.

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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i committed murder

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Whats a dogs favorite thing to eat? Food.

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Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

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What is the Civil War called in Virginia? The War of Northern Aggression.

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I need a way to meet local babes and get ripped in 4 weeks. Shame there aren't any popularly advertised methods of doing that around here...

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What has nine arms and sucks? Four children with two arms snacking on a lollipop, and one child with one arm snacking on a lollipop.

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Roses are Violets, Violets are Roses, I am a dumb ass, The Hobbit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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