Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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why did the packers win the superbowl? because they were very good

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What did the Coke can say to the Pepsi can? Nothing it is a inanimate object and cannot speak.

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A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

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Why did the deer hunter shoot a deer? He told his wife he bought a new TV.

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What did the man say after being hit by a bus? Nothing he is now dead.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A: Me after domestic abuse.

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I wanted to burn some calories, so i lit a fat kid on fire

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Wgat did the umpire say to the asian batter? Foul ricebowl!

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Let them think that you are insane, vulnerable, and they wont bother leaking a lot of shit about you, this "shit info" will remain inaccurate and reveal weaknesses where there is none. I had to draw them away from you, but as soon as he began selling Intel regarding my missing eye, I figure our "not so friends in the unknown" would have eventually begun searching for "The one eyed man" among you. And had they not found one, they might just as likely made it seem as if there was one for the money. None of the thugs sent to attack me nor the "Nero decoys" where professionals, but those behind them sure are, considering that they paid these thugs more than what I make during a year. Gotta go pretty girl, hope we meet again in not so long. Moral: This is all a joke, get over it, Moral has left forever, mission complete.

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knock knock. no one answered so the man at the door went home.

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What did the man say when he lost his phone? Answer: I lost my phone!!

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Knock Knock. Who's There. Teenage Pregnancy

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whats my name? Matt

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LUKE, I am your father... this is your mother, your parents dont love you so we've adopted you

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Try this on your friends and make them look dumb So a plane crashes on the border between the USA and Canada. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury the survivors.

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what's red and horny a red unicorn

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What did the black guy say to you when you took his fried chicken Give me back my chicken

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Knock knock. Who is there? The FBI. They have a warrant for your arrest.

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I'm so punny.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet,

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Warning: Legit Joke Below What is the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? Only one can raise a child.

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A fish walks into a bar. He proceeds to talk the bartender. "Blub blub blub" The fish sitting next to him whispers to the bartender. "What is he talking about." The bartender shrugs.

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Yo mamma's so stupid she failed the SAT.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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