Yo mamma's so old... oh way no she's dead

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What's long and hard and looks like plastic? A plastic baton.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A cripple.

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What do you get when you cross a muslim and a mexican? i don't know, i just thought that this would make an interesting question.

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why do people play xbox 360's? because there poor people who cant afford a ps3

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Q: what did the hot dog say to the hamburger A: i want your buns

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You know it's sunny outside when you go outside and its sunny

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Guy 1: Hey look under there Guy 2: Under what inanimate object that is physically visible and made up of atoms

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well, there is no way to accurately estimate this number being that 1.woodchucks in fact do not chuck wood and 2. there is no time frame given for said action to take place

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Why did Lisa fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock! Who's there? *Definitely not Lisa.

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What do you call two black men walking down a stairwell? Their names.

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Women

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Three men on a journey stop at a farm and ask the farmer if they might be allowed to stay the night. The farmer consents upon one condition: that the visitors not lay a hand on his daughter. The men respected the farmers wishes and left in the morning.

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what did the apple say to the orange, nothing fruits can't talk

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why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens just walk places. they have no agenda.

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you know what rhymes with sloth. rape

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

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What does a person and a tree have in common? You can knock them down if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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what did the black guy say to the other black guy? good morning

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ObamaCare

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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96

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daffodils are yellow, Flowers come in lots of colours...

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What's brown and sticky? Human Feces

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops