- Anti Joke

Uh, Liz, he is staring at the screen... He says you are right and knows, so he cant get mad, ill trust you both, but it better work, or this one is on me. Oh by the way, yeah he is eating, sorry its late here, and I am the only nurse here about now Ironically this place is full of doctors but they dont seem to give a crap about the man that pays their checks. Doctors said no, Nero said "you are fired" Doctor changes his opinion, glad to see he is taking charge around here, I am just worried about his sleep, he is beginning to halucinate and I doubt any stimulants will help. But fine, ill trust you, sorry, really shaking my boots here, I really do not want to, but this is not about me.

Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

Two men are walking along the Great Wall of China. "Do you know how many years it took to build this?" one man asked. "Yes," the other replied. "Me too."

Why did the bus crash? Because the bus driver was a potato.

Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

What's the heaviest part of an elephant? Its body.

Q: What's pink and fuzzy? A: Pink Fuzz...

- Knock knock - Who's there - James - James who ? - James Redwood.

What's Brown and Sticky? A stick.

In mother Russia you don't eat cookie. Dog eat shark. -B.Gill

What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?

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http://anti-joke.com/

You're momma is so dumb, she has troubles passing her math unit and should seriously consider a math touter

The cow went moo

Redneck girls. Now there's a joke.

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

What do you call a guy wearing a white leisure suit? Mister Rourk? No, you call the dud wearing the white duds.

Why black guys are the fasttest runners? Because the slowers are already in prison

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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