the person above me ^ lost his virginity to a howler monkey and the person below me was his gay friend untill he found out about his recent run in with a howler monkey and does not wish the same fait as he does.

Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg. Chickens evolved from their pre-historic ancestors who each laid an egg with a slight genetic mutation until one egg contained what is now classified as the modern chicken.

What is red white and blue Blood. I was lying about the white and blue.

Rubies are red Some diamonds are blue I have candy so get in my car

What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

What do you call a guy named Bob hanging by a string? Plum Bob

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

If life throws you melons you might be dyslexic, but you also might not be.

Wanna hear a joke? Denver Broncos.

What starts with F and ends with Uck? F U C K

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew -a pizza is food

Neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. It never receives it because it can't talk and is far too small to see.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they're already smart enough to achieve interplanetary space travel.

Why did the polar bear cross the road? He didn't, there are no roads in Antarctica.

Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? She's dead.

Who do you call when you see a ghost on the street? GHOSTBUSTERS!!!! no, ghostbusters are not real, you call the police

Wanna here a joke? Dylan Shipleys penis!!!

Your mom is so fat that she is at risk for type two diabetes.

Yo momma so Fat that she got picked for the Olympic Swim Team

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

What's the difference between a black man and a bench. The bucket.

A baby seal walks into a club.

A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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