What is the difference between an Irishman and a plank of wood? Almost everything, including anatomy, chemical make up, mass etc

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I scream, you scream, we all scream when we're chased by bears.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. The mailman who? Anthrax.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call an angry black man? Angry.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why didnt little timmy have a pencil? He was poor

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's clear and looks like water? Water.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a fat black guy in KFC? A guy who likes KFC.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

knock knock who's there? a murder who? a murder who kills you and your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

toby limbers is gonna follow in his uncles footsteps, the gay ones

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red, violets are blue, I slipped you some roofies You'll be out in a few

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Hey, did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No He didn't either.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the doctor say to the morbidly obese man? "You should get on a diet. It's a surprise you're even alive for so long with such a bad heart" The next day the man dies while eating celery.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A kid walked into a bar, but was kicked out immediately as state law mandates you must be 21 to be withing 12 feet of an operable bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so there i must be a pig

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's long, hard, and filled with semen? A submarine

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What happens when you light a truck full of babies on fire and drive it off a cliff filled with lava and set off explosives when they land? The babies die. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the book fly to Cambodia? It was on a plane that was delivering educational material to third world countries to enhance their schools and increase their literacy.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops