Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

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What is a dyslexic mathematician's favourite song? Angels. [L]

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What did the guy say when he died? nothing, he was dead

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In Soviet Russia a lot of people were killed for voicing their opinion against Stalin

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What do you call somebody who votes for Donald Trump? A voter. What do you call somebody who votes for Hillary Clinton? A voter.

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What noise does a dead dog make ? Nothing its dead

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What is white and fluffy? A cotton ball.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Apparently he can walk now.

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What did the Muslim say to the American? Hi

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Yo momma so fat when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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Q: What is Paul's nickname A: His name is Paul, he doesn't need a nickname

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56

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alert("The Game");

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Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

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A duck walks into a bar and says, "Have you got any grapes?" The bartender replies "No." The duck then leaves but returns the next day and again asks, "Have you got any grapes?" And again the bartender answers, "No." This happens again the next day and in annoyance the bartender yells, "If you come in tomorrow and ask if I have any grapes, then I will nail your feet to the floor!" The next day the duck came into the bar and asked, "Have you got any nails?" to which the bartender replied, "Yes." The duck then walked out of the bar

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Why did the Catholic priest get excommunicated from the church? He couldn't read.

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What is worse

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What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

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cms.......?????

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Q: Why did the policeman stare at the big-breasted victim? A: She was dead.

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Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

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whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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