What do you call a fat Chinese person? A chunk.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did one hostage say to the other hostage? Hrmfhrmfphmfr

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: Why was the blonde in a black car? A: Becasue the car was a herse and she was killed a week before in an accident where the other driver was drunk Becasue his wife had left him with no money and no kids to come home to.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between a terrorist and Bill Gates? One founded a successful software company, and the other commits mass murder of civilians for political gain.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the Chicken say to the Interviewer Interviewer: how do you feel about your eggs chicken: the eggs are actually my periods. Interviewer: how do you feel about your periods ChicKen: you eat my periods everyday. people make cakes, omlettes and all these food out of my period. Imagine the world running on your period. Interviewer: what are your feelings on your periods Chicken: I have a mixture of feelings. i feel really scared because the farmers would kill me if i can have my periods. i feel glorified because the world runs on my eggs and i feel proud. I feel freaked out because the world actualy runs on my periods

thumb_up thumb_down +3

whats the difference between sand and period blood? You cannot gargle sand.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how many dead babys can fit in a bathtub 17

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call two black men sitting on the porch? Craig and Smokey

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why couldnt the polish people live in the outhouse? because the mexicans in the basement were too noisy

thumb_up thumb_down -15

One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted off in space.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did Batman say to Robin before he got into the car? "Robin, get in the car."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: Why did the girl fell from the swing? A: Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

the fat boy named biggins ate a twinkie, a man named scruffy came along and shot biggins, now biggins has no nose

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q-What do you call kids who go to school? A- Students.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are black violets are black I can't hear anything I'm Helen Keller .

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A bear walked into a bar, unfortunately there were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your mom is so stupid, she decided to go back to school.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops