Q: what did the poor, blind, deaf, orphan girl get for Christmas? A: cancer.

Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

Marrage s like a card game. You start off with 2 hearts and 1 diamond. You end up wishing for a club and a spade!

Homeless man....it's what's for dinner!

What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

What would you do if Spider Man gave you super powers like his? Nothing. Spider Man is not real therefore you are most likely dreaming and need to wake up soon.

How much does a fat penguin weigh? 45 kilograms.

Penis Gabriel - Go eat some ice cream! Boner McDaniels - No. Penis Gabriel - Ok.

I've got a tip for the ladies. Or if you like I can put the whole thing

How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

A little girl had a sleepover with her friends. They watched a movie, then went to bed at a reasonable time. /

Why did the clown drink all the sweet wine? Because he was an alcoholic.

Roses are red Pickles are green I leik ur legs and whats inbetween

Your so fat that you have a 75% chance increase of dying from congenital heart failure.

What is red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

The WNBA.

Why did Humpty Dumpty fall off the wall? The wall was unstable and not to be sat on.

Q: What do you call a Muslim controlling a plane? A: A pilot.

What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

Why is the black guy unable to support his family? He's 3 years old.

A man walks into a Norfolk pub. The landlord (not being very worldly) notices he is of Middle Eastern descent and asks "are you Bin Laden"? To this the man replies "No I bin Swaffham". (Needs to be said in Norfolk accent)

An blind orphan in an impoverished Irish village develops both AIDS and terminal cancer. You laughed a little at that. You are going to hell.

Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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