Why did the dog cross the road? He saw a fish.

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A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

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A man wearing dark sunglasses walks into a convenience store with a dog on a leash. He goes to the middle of the store, and he starts swinging the dog around over his head by the leash. The store clerk comes over and asks, "what are you doing?" The man replies, "Ajiohskdcojqpowuskncvlkzb" Not knowing what else to do, the clerk calls 911. It turns out the man's name is Ruprict, and he has escaped from the local mental institution. A police officer shortly arrives to bring Ruprict back to the hospital.

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what has 4 legs three eyes and a horn? a:yo mama

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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What's a foot long and slippery? A slipper.

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What came first?....the woman or the sandwich

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew. The pizza doesn't scream in the fire

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Roses are red Violets are blue These two lines are overused I wonder to what poem they originally come from

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Golgo12 here, I can see how some people consider you insane Nero, glad to know point zero is the starting ground of your elysum, that should show them how a modern society should be like. You got six years left to live? That sucks man sorry to hear that. Ur real name is Nero? Axel Knight sounds so much more... You.

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whats worse than someone on the phone during a movie? your mother queefing on your bowl of cheerios

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If it looks like grass, smells like grass, and tastes like grass... Then you were honestly misled when ordering that salad.

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What happens when Terran Hansen has sex with a cow? Jesse Z.

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS ROAD?!!! cause he was silly

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What makes you hate life and feel good at the same time? A rapist.

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some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

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Wha did the fireman say when he burnt his finger? Shit.

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what do German people eat at BBQ ' s ? burgers and hotdogs and kebabs and fried chicken with a garnish of summer salad washed down with a cold mouth tingling glass of coca cola and jews

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so....a guy is sitting on the couch looking out his living room window and a cab pulls up and honks..he says to himself, "wow that was quick, i just called for the cab 5 minutes ago!"

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Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

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Knock Knock The homeowner's acquaintance had called him just minutes prior because he had forgotten something at his house. With this having occurred, the homeowner had a strong sense of who was at the door. Being a cautious person however, he checked his prediction by examining the man through the door's peephole. Having asserted that it was what he had in mind, the homeowner opened the door and handed him some papers that were of importance to the acquaintance.

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I like boys!!!!! CC

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So a man and a woman are siting at the same park table Woman: sir are you touching my leg erotically Man: No mam for you see I am a parapaligec

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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