What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

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Why did the plane crash. its pilot was a loaf of bread.

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a black man pays his child support

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Why was Shane cool... Because he was a cool bean.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the horrors of factory farming.

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Six hats walk out of a garden. When mustard offal fruit paps.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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Joe: CHOP CHOP KICK PUNCH HI-YAH! Mike:What are you doing? JOE: PRACTICING CHPO MENTAL KICK KARATE!!!!!!!

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What do you call this? A sentence in English.

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a chicken walks into a cafe, where it is swiftly caught, killed, plucked ,and served with stuffing and all for £5.99

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A dwarf walks under a bar.

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Two muffins are in an oven. It was a really small batch.

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whats funny about female tennage life? SELF HARM OOOOO YEAHHHH

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Well... At that time everyone expected that the only people that knew hypnosis where either "born with the gift from the stars" or was some old beard man that spent "hundreds of years in the mountains".or a wizard or a shamanic priest, or well some guy in a particular stupid suit of sorts, it increased its potency simple as that, as having people stare at me and laugh because "You are not some beardy guru master" is a pretty bad start for the effective use of mass hypnosis. Mono-ideoism actually just means really concentrated focus on a single object or state of mind, the thing about the name (aside from sounding kinda mono-idiotic) is that strong focus alone does NOT lead to a state of relaxation which is one of the prime requirements to achieve a state of trance, I mean try focusing on something really hard and your body produces a huge amount of beta waves, aka stress. All of that is bullshit, but my horrible childhood did leave me with the "gift" to space out pretty quickly, so I learned it pretty fast without really knowing what it was at first.

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a gay man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out for trying to seduce men.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? • • • Stubbing your toe.

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There is a Mexican, American, and an Italian on a boat.They start to sink. All of them brought things from their country. The Mexican threw burritos over and said, "We have too much of these." The American threw american cheese over and said, "We have too much of these in our country." The Italian throws over pizza and says the same thing. They are still sinking. Then, the American picks up the Mexican, throws him over and says, "We have too much of these in our country."

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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Why is this site popular? Because people don't read the terms of service.

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Why do Eskimos build igloos? Because it is the most practical form of habitation for their climate zone, lifestyle, and availability of materials.

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Your mum so ugly that she isn't married

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

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A guy named John wanted to finish his life. Now he is dead

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What did one muslim say to the other muslim? Nothing, muslims are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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