Your friend is so gay that he isn't attracted to hot women

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A Chinese, American, and German were all on the a boat sinking off the Border of the U.S. So the American called the U.S Coast Guard and they were rescued and taken to a nearby hospital. Two of the three members are still alive today and haunted by the memory of that day.

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if i have 2 bananas, and you have 2 bananas, then together we have 4 bananas what are the chances?

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What do you call a purple apple? Bruised.

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Why did the boy hate his mom? She was a fucking bitch.

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What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

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Why didn't the dog like baseball? Being a dog, it had no idea or interest in what baseball is.

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Q:If quizes are, "guizicles," then what are tests? A:Who calls quizes, "quizicles?"

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What do you say to the woman who just got raped? Nothing you just raped her

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Name three similarities between racism and sexism I, S and M

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What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

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Roses are red violets are blue we're stuck together like superglue roses go brown violets go darker cut the crap and the stupid laughter...I just went through a breakup

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So a guy comes into a bar... And he is cited for public indecency.

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Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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If you have two berries in one hand, and three in the other, what do you get when you put them together? Five.

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What is blue and smells like the sea The ocean

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What nickname do you give Harrison Kinney if he is good at remixing music? Harrison "Remix" Kinney

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What's worse than the holocaust? An open-minded black man.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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