Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What would Chuck Norris do if you insulted him? Nothing. He probably doesn't have time for such foolishness.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What was Hellen Kellers biggest mistake? Knock knock jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -24

If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he had poor coordination.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your heart.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's worse than losing $100 at the racetrack? Losing at Russian Roulette

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did the little boy cross the road? because he had been raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your lord and savior?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the child lying in the scrap yard? because he was being torn apart by guard dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Kim Kardashian got a job.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the girl gO shopping?! Because she got paid and wanted to blow(;

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What game will Helen Keller always win? A: Marco Polo. She is a fast swimmer.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

HELLO BENJAMIN HELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMIN

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: what did the black man say after the white man said knock knock A: who's there

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what's worse than being attacked by a giant ant? being attacked by two giant ants

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the girl crying on the busy street? She was naked.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops