Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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What did the homeless man say to his friends? He doesn't have any friends.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out".

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What does shit smell like? Your maaaa

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whats green and slimy? green slim

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What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

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What did the dad say when the irresponsible goth problem child asked for a gun Yes

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What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

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Justin Bieber paid a donation to the anti-homosexual orginization.

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What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

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Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

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A man walks to a bar. He drinks too much and dies. His family is informed later that evening.

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Why did Jill come "tumbling" down the hill after Jack broke his crown? She fell running on a hill, essentially why Jack broke his crown.

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guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

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What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

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What do you call a 3 legged dog on a red unicycle? An unlikely set of circumstances.

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what is black and white and red all over? a group of people of mixed races playing paintball.

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What do you do if you see a bleeding Mexican in your front yard? Quickly respond to the accident and supply the wounded victim with first aid.

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Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: the WNBA

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, i was dropped on my head as a baby, 978e456293&*(^$%ZYI467z57967454^&4543^%$54#%^*44jffdGHFYI

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how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What do you call a child that has been stabbed? A dead child

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So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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