Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Doctor, Doctor, I feel like there's two of me! There's not. Your long lost twin died of terminal cancer.

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Whats worse than being gay? Nothing.

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Found out my dad was gay the other day. Now I have to take him to dance clubs, take him to musicals and find the man who gave birth to me.

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jordan HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHH

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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What did nearly headless nick say when he became headless nick. Nothing because he doesnt have a head

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What did the father say to his daughter? "I'm going to rape you."

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Hey babe, are you a refrigerator? -No... Good--'cause I wanna f*ck you so hard. Best pickup line. Always works.

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What do you get when two black men walk into a bar? A few salesmen celebrating their recent pay raise.

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What does a cat sound like when it's being raped by a human? MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!

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What did the black man say to the asian man? Whats up man!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your whole family is dead And now it's time for you!

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A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

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What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

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why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

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Eliza eh? Of you I do not know but at least you used the correct code yourself, I suppose Nero7 kept your existence hidden from most of us for a reason. This "point Zero" is no more, about time people got out of the fucking north pole anyways, he was buried there, as his identity and existence is better off kept secret from the outside world for reasons many, none the less because if he is found and identified, undesired company might track whatever loose threads he might have left, straight back to us and we are not exactly operating within the parameters of... Legality anymore. Listen, if you want to know more give me the code straight out (I could not care less about deciphering shit right now and we are leaving horseshit network anyways) And I will tell you what Major6 knows, because as far as the screams roaming these halls can tell, he is still alive, you just better be fast, my men and women are not exactly experts at keeping these people alive... Yet, but enough idle chitchat. If you are who you claim to be, you should have the code I need, bring it, and I will present you with the neccesary information... ...Fail to do so, and I suggest that you never address any of us again fair lady, while we can simply not be tracked down, the security here is... Do I need to say? Neo-Nero.

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A black and a mexican start a resturaunt it turns out to be a big success and they make a chain and profit from it.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Domestic violence is a crime. She should leave her abusive partner and seek help.

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A: Ask me if I'm a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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