Holy crap it's a talking muffin!

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Why couldn't the kid get into the pirate movie? Tickets were sold out.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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1.Roses Are Gray, Violets Are Gray. I Am A Dog. Can I Eat Your Leg? 2.What Did The Sandwiches Say To The Grilled Cheese? Nothing. Sandwiches Can't Talk Due to The Lack Of Organs.

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What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

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A black man is setting up contingency measures of protection in his personal place of residence when all of a sudden, several warning alarms sound and a few specialized people with red "combating" devices who were alerted by the blatant scenerio unfolding before them were moving quickly in order to match previously stipulated criteria of value. The black man and his family were partaking in a monthly fire drill unfolding in their own house since they were extremely responsible, law-abiding citizens of the city they were located in that required various kinds ofl saftey precautions to be taken so to mitigate the serious chance that people might be hurt by preventable, residential distasters.

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Roses are red Violates are blue Go to hell I hate you

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

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LeBron James: Kobe, i got a ring will you stop making fun of me? Kobe Bryant: Yes Kobe and Michael Jordan: LeBron asked if he gets a ring if we'll stop making fun of him LeBron James: Hey Kobe why didn't you answer when i called? Kobe Bryant: Sorry, I only heard it ring once

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A man walked into a bar There were some other people there too

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What's the most common pickup line in a gay bar? "Hi, may I buy you a drink?"

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scenario: 12 men in bikinis throwing snowballs at each other in Africa. Question: Who ate all the world's giant pears? Answer: It was an allergy to noses!!

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What did the little gril with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer

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Q: What did the police officer tell the man without a shirt on? A: Put a shirt on.

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why was Austin sad cause his dick fell off

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Your mom is such a slut, she had unprotected sex at least once.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

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How do you catch a squirrel? Use a live, humane trap, and release it back into the wild afterwards.

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Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

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If you see Chuck Norris you should probably tell him hey for me.

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what is sad about gingers ? they are an unrecognised visible minority.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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