What nickname do you give Harrison Kinney if he is good at remixing music? Harrison "Remix" Kinney

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Roses are red Cranberries are tart It sure stinks when you fart

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Do you know who's gay? Homosexuals.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Q:What happened when the bear walked into the bar? You cannot answer because you were seriously injured by the bear.

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What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

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A black man burned down my house. It was on minecraft you racist!

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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Why did the gecko cross the road.... Because he saw great deals on car insurance!!!

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Theres an irishman , scottish man and a welsh man on a plane they where going to france

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How do u kill a mocking bird ? Stab it

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Me, myself, and I walked into a bar. We didn't say anything to each other because I'm not schetsophrenic.

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How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

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I'm so hungry I could eat a well prepared meal!

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What did the patient say when the doctor told him he had aids? "Oh my god. Are you sure?"

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what did one pedophile say to the other at the playground? DIBZ!!!

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What did Mitch say to joe when he saw his fly was down? Nothing because he's a bagle

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What did the boy with Aids pray for? A gun

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Whats green all over and travels at 100mph A christmas tree in a gokart

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Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

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A married man takes the ring off his finger.

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Wanna know way i don't eat grapes? I hate Grapes.

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What did the man say to the young, blond athletic girl walking by? "Hi."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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