What do you get when you cross a peanut and a snake? peanutsnake

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? It had no legs.

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How do racist jokes start? Generally with a racially insensitive stereotype.

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Roses are red,violets are blue I've got aids & now so do you Merry Christmas

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How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

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What did the boy say when he could'nt find his dog? I wonder where Spot went.

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Why wasn't the white guy voted for president? He had down syndrome

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So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

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how do you kill a rich blonde? give her black die

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why is john so fat years of over eating

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

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Have you heard the joke about the cat? No Are you kitten me

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What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

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Why couldn't John play soccer? Because he was arrested for being black.

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Whats the best part about 23 year olds? Theres 20 of them

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a show horse jumps over a bar

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Jimmy said he would never beat his wife, so why did he do it anyway? Because he was a hypocrite.

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Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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Why did the old man go to the retirement home? The 75 year old man had a 45 year career in pluming and he thought it was a good time to retire after saving enough money to be happy and he could spend the rest of his life with his wife. The retirement home was also not that far away from his grandchildren so he liked the location and the home was also very clean and the workers seemed very nice. But this was just a visit to see if he liked it, he may live there soon.

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

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What is the different on a black guy and a bicycle ? The black guy steals the bicycle, but the bicycle dont steal the black guy. Yes, my bike got stolen ...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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