I scream. You scream. We all scream and huddle in a corner of our first grade classroom because of a masked gunman.

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Why do mexicans jump the gate Because theres a sale at chipotle

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Three women are on an airplane. One's a blonde, one's a redhead, and one's a brunette. Unfortunately, the plane was going to crash and there was nothing they could do but jump out and parachute to safety. So the captain said to each of the three ladies, "You can only take one of your possessions when you parachute out of the plane." The blonde says "I will take my watch becau--" But before she could finish her sentence the plane exploded because the flames on the wing had ignited the fuel tank. No one survived.

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What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? heart worms

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How do you make a little boy cry? You rape his dog

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What is the answer to number 7 on the test? Time for you to get a watch.

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Did you hear about the Dislexic Devil worshipers? They sold their soul to Santa.

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A guy decides to bring his new blonde girlfriend to a football game. After the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game. She replies: "Oh it was great, I loved watching those men in tight clothes, but there is one thing I don't understand." "What did you not understand?" And the blonde says: "Well, at the begginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. Then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back. So I thought to myself, gosh it's just a quarter!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He grew tired of hearing the most over-used joke set up in recorded history.

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get off me you fat b*tch or i will mash you up like a potato

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Oh and Nero, what are you suffering from? Is it dangerous? Are you dying or something? Please dont scare me like that again.

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dinosours eat beagles and then unicorns eat norwalls then th shiny squarles eat you then unvirse inploads

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T-Dog scare me

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Q: what's red, green and goes over 100 miles per hour? A: a frog in a blender

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what did the right wing jew say after he was arrested for murder? bt we went through the holocust

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1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

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Whats the best thing that happened to the jews The Holocaust

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What happened when the Mexican man contracted the muscles of his large bowel after a large meal? Shit made its way to his anus

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Why did the chicken crossed yo mama? Because your moms a man and your birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as he wants to.

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Your mother's so fat, her blood type was Ragu

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Q: Do you know what Lady Gaga make for his birthday? A: A party

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dfasdf sdf ds fds fds f sdf s fs

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Q:what did a keppy kid with a big nose say A:hi im josh Roberts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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