What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

A woman walks into a bar. Since having equal rights, she too falls unconcious..... Several men walk toward the bar

I'm called the! no i wish am I left

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken. How do you get a baby to run faster? Chase it with the lawn mower. What do you get when you cut a baby with a straight razor? An erection. What do you get when you put a dead baby in a blender? Hold on. I'll tell you in a second. What's pink and spits? A baby in a frying pan. -S

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm colorblind.

Have you seen Stevie Wanders new house? No. Neither has he.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

Ju... Just why?

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

A jew walks into a bar He receives a phone call and promptly leaves

why did the chicken cross the road? because the chicken had enough of life and wanted to commit suicide due to recent tragic events such as his cheating wife, his druggie son, his prostitute daughter, losing his home, and getting fired

Why did the man smell like french toast? His wife previously made him a plate of it that he ate before walking out of the house.

when chuck norris does a pushup, he is tearing the muscles in his biceps, deltoids, core, and triceps in order to make them stronger.

Roses are red violets are blue suck my **** and I'll **** you too

Why was the black man at the back of the bus... Cause all the other seats were taken

Why are black people like trees? Because they fall down if you hit them multiple times with an axe.

Roses are Red. Violets are blue. I took a shit on your wife's face last night.

What did the mother say to her son? I have Leukemia.

Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

What did the black man say to the other black man? We are both black men.

Two men walk into a bar...They are traveling together for a convention and like pub type bars and are excited to be there.

Person 1. Knock-knock. Person 2. Who's there? Person 1. The doctor. Person 2. The doct-- Person 1. You have cancer and have about three weeks to live.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...