Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he fell off a cliff

thumb_up thumb_down +14

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why didn't Rebecca Black take the bus? Because she would have had a heart attack with all of the seat choices.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

knock knock. I have a doorbell, you don't have to knock.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do Tutankhamun and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a bird with a broken wing? A bird with a broken wing.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

My piggy bank is empty. No change there then

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is worse than finding a worm in ur apple Idk I am asking u

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What was Helen Keller book called Bsnshsiengwkaisg

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock knock" my mom says not to talk to strangers!"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

i like men but im not gay

thumb_up thumb_down -24

ACT 2 CHAPTER 4 GEARS OF WAR 3 TICKER EASTER EGG.... MICHAEL VICKS HOUSE

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It couldnt because a chicken was obscuring its path.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Let them think that you are insane, vulnerable, and they wont bother leaking a lot of shit about you, this "shit info" will remain inaccurate and reveal weaknesses where there is none. I had to draw them away from you, but as soon as he began selling Intel regarding my missing eye, I figure our "not so friends in the unknown" would have eventually begun searching for "The one eyed man" among you. And had they not found one, they might just as likely made it seem as if there was one for the money. None of the thugs sent to attack me nor the "Nero decoys" where professionals, but those behind them sure are, considering that they paid these thugs more than what I make during a year. Gotta go pretty girl, hope we meet again in not so long. Moral: This is all a joke, get over it, Moral has left forever, mission complete.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did Dr. Pepper say to Sprite? I'm a Doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road? Its children were just slaughtered.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's funnier than 24? 25.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A couple arrive at a Halloween party for nudists. Then they enjoy the themed decor and food.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops