How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Loss of habitat.

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What's worse than being beaten by your Father? Well, it depends.

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Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

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How many people with ADD does it take to...Oh look! Shiny!!!

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There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

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Whats long and hard on a black man..... 2nd grade

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Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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Where did the Jew put his money? In a low rist, interest bearing mutual fund.

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Ily bae

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Ask me if i'm a fish. Are you a fish? Do I look like a fish?

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If there are four gay men that come into a bar and need to sit down when all you have is one stool; what do you do? Get three more stools.

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I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

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What do you call a dog with 2 legs? Doesn't matter, it's not going to come anyways.

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Q. How do you get a dinosaur off a slide? A. You tell him he hasn't lived for billions of years.

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its body.

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The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

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What did Osama Bin Laden say to his barber? ????? ??? ?????? ??? ?????, which, in their native language means, I would like to get a haircut.

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Why did the man with no arms and legs fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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Q: what do you call a camel with a garbage bag on its head? A: A ziploc baggie

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A boy walk in. What did you think I was gonna add "into a bar"? Also, boys under the age of 21 aren't allowed to drink.

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Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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