A black man walks into a bar. "Whoops, that's not the Weed shop!"

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How do you make a small child cry? You cut off his fingers..

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Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

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A man is mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he reaches down to see if something's stuck in the blades. What does he pull out? His finger.

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Why was 97 afraid of 98? Because 98,99, 100!

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I had sex with my mother in law

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What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

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Why was Jerry Sanduski at K-Mart? He heard boys pants were half off!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Start running Cuz ima F*** you Runn Forest Runn! Jubie

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What's the different between a trampoline and a baby? You take off your shoes before jumping on a trampoline.

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What did god say when he saw the first black person? He will do alright for him self

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One more note for my children: ...My words appeal to your dark, evil side, it is that which might trigger your fear and disgust... But dont blame your fear on me you moron... ....To those that react with fear and disgust towards my comments: You know the fear and disgust in you, your own emotions make you feel fear and disgust for yourselves, because like all and everything that feels the inspiring words of the Black Angel... ...You know you like it ;) The friendly Black Angel/R*pist: God can free you from the temptation I inspired in your heart, but why would you? Now, thumb this comment down, so you can feel "good about yourself" and suffer in life in order to become a slave and serve the one that made you suffer troughout life... You think me, yet you fail to see that if it where me, I would have be Jehovah your GOD!... ...Worry not though, all of those that plan to stick alive for 10-15 years and I allow to live, will get to serve The Only God, your EMPEROR: Moral Man... Know my name and fear it, and yes mortal, you will also be screaming it...

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Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

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i did not type this on 12/23/11 at 8:49:47

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a black man and a white man walk into a job interview. neither of them get the job due to lack of skill in the field.

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wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

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How do you know if a black man was in your house while you weren't home? When you let them enter to babysit your children.

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Q: How many Marys does it take to drive you crazy? A: Just one ::stares at Mary Annoyingly::

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What do you call a orphan with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Scrood

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Not Suzy!!

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What's red ad looks like a green bucket? A red bucket to a color blind person

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Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with men other than her husband.

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Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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