Girl: What's up? Guy: If I told you, would you sit on it?

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What's beneath Chuck Norris's beard? A chin I presume, as that is what most humans have under their beards. Chuck Norris is a human and therefore is likely to have a chin. This is all based on the assumption that he is a human, because of the many characteristics he has shown that are humanlike.

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Yo mama is so fat, she needs to get serious about her diet, or else she might die of some sort of weight related issue.

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What did the guy who walked into a bar say? Ouch

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Knock knock Whos there? A rapist. Go away I'm calling the police!! (The rapist then proceeds to break open the door, beat the woman repeatedly with a baseball bat, and then rapes her)

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What happened when the man went to the bar? He got drunk, drove home injuring a young teen mother, brutally assaulted his wife to the point of death. He's in prison serving 3 life sentences.

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What do you call a black man in a pumpkin patch? His name is Bill.

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Whats the difference between two flies? Nothing, they're both flies.

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Why didn't the Mexican have a job? Because stereotypes made employers unjustly reluctant to hire a hard-working, competent man.

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What starts with a P and ends with a O-R-N? Popcorn

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the police there was several calls from people in the sarounding area who heard screaming from ur basement

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Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and the killing of 12 other numbers

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Did you hear the Joke about the Deaf kid? Neither did he.

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Hats better than a stick? A stone

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why did jenny drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock who's there? not jenny.

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why do giraffes have long necks? because their heads are a long way from their bodies

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What is you problem!? Im retarded, what is your problem?

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Your muffins smell good! Oh you is just nasty.

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Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF

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Your mom is so poor, she can't afford nice clothing.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I ate your horse.

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Your mom walked into a bar and got kicked out cause there's no dogs allowed.

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How do you fit 100 ethiopians in a phone box? With great difficulty.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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