Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

A cheeseburger and fries walk into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we don't serve lunch"

If you are floating down main street in a canoe and your front right propeller falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones

My, you you... SEDUCER! XD, and there I go proving your point by going uppercase XD

Why was the man sad? Because he found his 80 year old mother had been raped and murdered in her home...

A black man is escorted into a prison. He's the new warden, and he's been shown to his office.

It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

Nipples+poop= good stuff. Hellllll yeaaahhhh

Why didn't children go to their grandma at summer? Cause, they were hit by a car earlier that year and they are dead.

A drunk guy walks out of an AA meeting.

Scrub that muck off at once Hubert Cumberdale!

"Why did the chicken cross the road" "why" "to get to the gay guys house" "knock-knock" "who's there?" "The chicken..."

Knock knock. Who's there? Three months to live. Three months to live who? The C-Scan showed a massive, inoperable tumor in your brain that's been developing for years. You have only three months to live.

A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

what did the parapelegic (limbless) kid get for his birthday? Heart failure

What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

why did the plane crash? the pilot was a loaf of bread.

O: How do you kill a black man? A: Shoot him

A- Why did the chicken cross the road? B- I honestly do not care.

Q: how do you tame a dingo? A: Feed it babies

Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

The adventures of HAROLD THE MONGOOSE: Harry dug a hole. He did not like that hole so he dug a new one. He liked that hole so he did not dig another one. Harry slept on a rock. He did not like that rock. So he smashed it with a ham. Harry found a new rock. He liked that rock so he didn't smash it with a ham. Harry ate a snake. He did not like that snake so he regurgitated it. Harry ate another snake. He liked that snake so he did not regurgitate it. Harry encountered a bush. He did not like that bush. Unfourtianately for Harry, that Bush became president.

Why are Chinese people only allowed one child? Because their government states so.

how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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