Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag? A. One is white, plastic and dangerous to young children, the other is a plastic bag.

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Q: what do you call a guy with a stolen cat in his pocket A: The police because stealing animals is illegal

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Why did the black person eat fried chicken Because fried chicken tends to be an abundant food in the African American community and that was the quickest and cheapest weekend afternoon food source nearest to his house. It is also found in many other communities throughout the country and even the world. Oh yeah, he was hungry

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Waseem likes to talk with his mouth full.

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What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

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i am predestal

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Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

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2 guys are on a scaffolding. One of them says to the other "If you fall from here, theres a high probability you will die"

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A homeless man stumbles upon $100 bill. It is actually just a food wrapper, his eyesight is lackluster.

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why did jenny get 22 turnovers in a basketball game? because jenny has down syndrome

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A chicken walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll it be?" His friends are very concerned about his sanity.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Tulips are red, And my garden is red. OMG...MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE

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How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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what does an adhd kid that causes all kind of trouble get? a buncha ass whoopins and some meds to dope his ass up

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? I stapled it to the first monkey!

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Whats black and white and red all over? An interracial aborted fetus

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what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

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What runs faster than a dead baby? Almost everything.

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Whats the difference between babies and a dart board? Dart boards dont bleed

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what do a jew homosexual and a latino all have in common? human dignity.

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Why wasn't the woman in the kitchen? Because she was in the living room.

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This guy walks up to the bartender, and says to him, " ill bet you $100 that i can piss in this cup from 20 ft away." The bartender laughs, thinking hes gonna get an easy 100 bucks. he says "ok, u do that and ill watch." the guy says "ok but one second." he then walks over to this table full of guys and the bartender see him and them whispering and shaking heads. then the guys walks back over, and says to the bartender, "ok here i go" then he whips out his wang and starts pissing all over the place,all over the bartender, the counter, everywhere but the cup. Meanwhile the bartenders laughing, because he thinks he made some easy money. then the bartender asks the guy for his money and the guy says, "alright one minute." then the guys walks over to the table full of guys and they al start pulling out money and give it to him. so the guy walks over to the bartender and says, "here you are, your 100 bucks" the bartender notices him smileing and says "u just lost 100 bucks why are you happy?" and the guy says, " you see that table full of guys over there? well, i bet them all $500 dollars that i could piss all over you, your counter and all of your things, and that youd not only be happy about it, but youd laugh!!!"

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Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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