A priest, a rabbi, and a baleen whale walk into a bar. The priest says, "Well I believe Jesus Christ is the only begotten son of God and my lord and savior, so I'll have some communion wine." The rabbi says, "Well I don't believe the messiah has yet walked the earth, so I'll have Manischewitz wine." The baleen whale says "EEEEEEOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNHHHHHHHHHH"

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What do Ethiopian children do at night? Starve

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Why was the lemon not feeling well? Because it had lemon aids.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Roses are red violets are blue I don't know you so get away from me.

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whats worse than getting in a car crash Heroshema

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Why did the business man jump into a mud puddle? He didn't. He was brutally stabbed to death then thrown in a pigpen in an attempt to conceal the evidence.

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What do you call a latino with a limp? John...his name is John

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

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How do you make a 6-year-old cry again? Tell him that without further change to the system, he'll end up paying $100,000 for school and then not have a job when he graduates.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them!!!

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2 pilots rowed a boat across the desert. How long did it take to reach the moon? Answer: Purple because chickens don't use magic.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They're both Tom Cruise.

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This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

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You know what's cool? Yep.

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what happens when a panther and a gorilla fight? i dont know i never seen it before.

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yo moma is so poor she cant afford free samples

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Q.why did the woman die A.she left the refrigerator door open then left the kitchen

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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What did the boy with no social skills say to the bully? I KNOW U ARE BUT WHAT AM I

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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