Why did the woman drown in the bathtub? Her husband was holding her under.

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knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

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Why did the Latino feel uncomfortable during anal, vaginal, and oral sex simultaneously? Because she was being raped by three men.

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Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

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Come in

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender lights him on fire.

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Why did the angry kid press the button? The button said "press here angry kid"

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Robin, get in the car!

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Why did Bob fall off a cliff? He had an epileptic episode.

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A black child gives away his piece of fried chicken. He is allergic, and eats some watermelon instead.

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When is a door not a door? When it was never actually a door in the first place and you just thought, for whatever reason, that i was.

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Why did the man have a hard time trying to open the door? The door was locked

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What do you get when you cross a rainbow with a unicorn, baby, helmet, a bag of sugar, some watermelons, and a jewish guy's hair? A rainbow unicorn baby helmet with a bag of sugar and some watermelons. and some jewish guy's hair.

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What do you call a dog with 2 legs? Doesn't matter, it's not going to come anyways.

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What happend to the Jew when he was near the fire place He very carefully tended to it

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What did the farmer say to the woodchucks chucking his wood? Excuse me, not to be rude but i worked very hard splitting and stacking that wood and would appreciate it if you would stop throwing it in the water.

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A little boy came runing to his mum' mummy...can a little girl have ababy? Mom reply no...so, the boy ran out and told his frnd 'we can play naked again'.,

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What's big, hairy and smells like sweat? The big show after a hard days work in the ring.

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why did the dog cross the street? because it saw a squirrel

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what do u say when u see your tv floating in the middle of the night? drop it n*****

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What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

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Nobody cares.

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Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

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Why is that blond girl so dumb? Because she has fetal alcohol syndrome.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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