what did the dead guy say to the boy? nothing he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was the girl's clitoris cut off? Her country practiced Sharia Law.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

knock knock whos there your mother open the door

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How heavy duty are your nachos? No, because babies simply cannot swallow blenders.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

I used to be an adventurer like you, until old age slowly took away my ability to move and go adventuring

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What do you call a cow that's not cooked? A cow

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I told my two lesbian friends I wanted to join them. I am a priest in a Gay Marriage friendly state and they are happily married.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, Violets are blue I suck at poetry, Show me your tits

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is samios' favorite position? ;) Full back... In the bum.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q:what did a keppy kid with a big nose say A:hi im josh Roberts

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I get no respect at all. That's because I am a liar and a thief with no redeeming qualities.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the grandson inherit when his grandmother died? Nothing, they both were killed in a tragic car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The man with a long history of Alzheimer's once said: Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cheese n' toast

thumb_up thumb_down +11

When life throws you knives, you're probably dead

thumb_up thumb_down -8

So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's the difference between scrambled eggs and scrambled dead babies? I don't like scrambled eggs..

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you make a snake blink? You can't

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Boy: Hey girl see these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! She stabs him dead End of story

thumb_up thumb_down -2

knock knock. who's there? someone.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops