Q: How many pandas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I don't know.

Naturally us at the order of exile, the ones that learn and teach the ways of Nero do not exist. Soon neither will those that speak against us. - Azure Dragon

What's Mexico's favorite sport? Cross Country

Police Report: A 100 year old man was beaten to death on his centennial birthday. Sources claim to say he was "getting his birthday punches"

Your mom is so poor, she can't afford nice clothing.

save me from the nothing ive become

when does the phrase "time heals all wounds" not apply? to people with fatal wounds.

What do you get if you throw a banana at the wall? Nothing.

2 men were in a bar, One was talking to the other, "I was walking down the street someone fell." "ha" "isis it true?" "What" "isis" and a bomb went off and they all died

Violets are blue, Roses are red. The sentence before was completely irrelevant, but I needed something to say before I tell you, Your family's been murdered by the KKK.

How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

Roses are Red Violets are Red Grass is Red Trees are Red My yard is on fire.

What did the water bottle say to the Itunes gift card Nothing,they're both innament object and don't have mouths.

What do you call a room full of lawyers? A group of legally educated professionals.

What did the sushi say to the bee? Nothing, a piece of sushi can't talk and a bee wouldn't listen, stupid.

What's worse than getting a fly stuck up your nose? Been alone in a hospital room with Jimmy Saville.

What do you call a group of black guys riding on horseback? You don't. You call the cops first.

Matt Damon

Why did the monkey eat his own poop? Because there was minimal resources where he was so he resorted to eat his own fecal matter

A horse walks into a bar. Being unable to comprehend human emotion, he shits all over the floor.

You wanna hear a joke? People that debase womens' rights.

Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

why did matt die? He had cancer

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...