How many new born babies does it take to cover the wall? Depends on how hard you throw'em

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding herpes in your apple.

Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

Why did hellen keller's dog kill itself? You would to if your name was, AIIEEEEIUUUUHGH!

why did the frog cry? Because he didn't get a message

9 + 10 = How much yo mama makes.

What's the difference between Lady Gaga and the Bogeyman? Nothing.

a fat old hobo named da'shovant'e ate a bucket of fried chicken then killed a little girl named poopface McFergusen

Did you hear about the Englishman who ran all the way to Loch Ness? Oh, that's a shame, because I didn't either.

Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

A black guy, a Latino guy and an Asian guy all walk in a bar. What do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

A man has had too many beers late at night. The bartender says "Sir, I'm going to have to cut you off"

What's the difference between a horse and a house? 1 letter.

Why did the kid give a bad presentation in class? He knew basically nothing about the topic, and on top of that had a large erection.

What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

Rylan Clark

What is the biggest lie in everyone's childhood? "School lunch food is actually good."

What's that Lassie? Timmy fell in the well again? And you couldn't care less because the stupid kid never looks where he's going?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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