why did the polar bear bury his face into snow? because he saw the 241543903 post and wanted to join in so he used a portal gun to teleport his head into some guy's freezer.

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What has five letters and sounds like "trucks?" Vroom

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Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

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A man comes home to find his wife in bed with another man. He then joins them.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at rhyming...... TITS

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of the dark? To be honest, I don't know, and I doubt you do either. Osama Bin Laden has been a fugitive on America's Top Ten Most Wanted list for over 10 years; there is no way that you could possibly know such personal information about him if the United States government can't even locate him and prosecute him for the heinous crimes he committed against the U.S. Don't ever lie to me again.

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Simon says.. Nothing because he is deaf, so therefor he would have to sign it to you.

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What's more fucked up that the Bill Cosby rape accusations? Sam and Adele's shower time on a Wednesday night

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A bat.

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it was christmas day and the boy opened his first present... and he immediately got aids.

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Why are bannanas bendy? Because unlike cucumbers bannas are not grown in a tube and are left to grow at their own pace.

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Why did sarah fall of the swing? she has no arms. Knock knock. whos there? not sarah.

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What do you call two black guys having sex with Paris Hilton? N*ggas in Paris

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Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

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where do you hide a black mans paycheck? somewhere he would never find it

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Make some fucking lemonade.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

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what is the difference between a cow?? there is no difference, you can't make a comparison between different object when there is only one object beïng named.

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When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

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What did the Nazi solider receive on his birthday? A bayonet up his ass.

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I always like to pack a second pair of pants, because if there's one thing my mother ever said to me it was 'please, I'm begging you - don't put me in a home.'

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why did the dad stop working on the roof he fell off

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Yo mama so fat when she sat around the hous she sat AROUND the house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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