A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

once there was a man named steve. he happily sniffs pot every day after work. especially on sundays. one day, his family finds him sniffing pot. they are disgusted and disappointed in his bad decisions. so they join him

What's there like a good neighbor? Your neighbor

Guess what? Chicken butt! No I have aids, you might want to get yourself tested

4

Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

Why is it a shame if a kid gets run over by a car? I like the newspaper headlines about stabbings better.

What is more funny than 8 babies in 1 bin? 1 baby in 8 bins.

Q: Suzy loves apples she will o anything to get her hands on an apple. A: You guys are so gullible!!! She DID eat Tom's apple. ...... then he killed her.

What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

Why did your mom cross the road? She Tripped and started rolling

How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

DAMMIT MY IPHONE IS IN REPAIR AND I CANT GET THE APP!!!!!!!

Why did the pineapple cry? It didn't, because it's a pineapple.

Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

What do you call a fish with one eye? A fish

What is worse than failing a class? Dress up for grown-ups.

why did the black man eat two buckets of fried chicken? because he was hungry and he likes fried chicken

A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

A woman walks into a bar but is promptly returned to her kitchen by an officer of the law. Later that same evening, she is beaten mercilessly by her husband for her outright disrespect for the social restrictions imposed upon her gender.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. Your family is dead.

Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

Did you know every 46 seconds somebody commits suicide Thumbs up for pancakes!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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