*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

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Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

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Did you hear Whitney Houston died? Yes.

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Q: What did Santa give the little boy for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's not real

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So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

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What do you call a puppy that has been left in the cold? A puppsicle

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"Hello." "Hi."

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brainfart

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Why is there trees? Because they change color... Oh yeah and for oxygen by Burflared

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if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

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What do you call a Mexican playing basketball? A man of hispanic heritage that enjoys the sport of basketball.

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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So Lindsay Lohan walks into a jewelry store. She buys a $2,500 necklace and goes on her way.

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Why could the red-haired boy sing higher notes than the blonde-haired boy? He was castrated at birth.

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whats red and and has 202 legs? an ostrich, ok i lied about 200 legs and the red part

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: What kind of bread would you like, brown or white? Penguins answers: Well, it doesn't really matter since I drove here.

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When life gives you melons, your dyslexic

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Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't reply because horses don't speak. However, he is confused and scared by the unfamiliar surroundings. Trying to escape, the horse breaks his leg. The horse must be put down.

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your moms so fat when she sat on your ipod it turned into an ipad

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24

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Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

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What do you call a supporter of Barrack Obama? A welfare recipient

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Why did the tree stay home from school? Because, trees don't have school.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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