A Jew walks into a bar. He sits down for about half an hour, enjoys some drinks and calls a taxi to take him home.

Is that my bread? I sure hope so.

Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

What did the skateboarder do when he was trying to do an ollie kickflip 360 and tailslide on a rail and dismount heelflip to manual? He fell

3 women are on a plane. One blonde, one brunnete, and the other a red head. The pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. The 3 women find out that there is only one parachute in the plane. The plane crashes and they all die.

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

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boy: you want to hear something funny? girl: what? boy: women's rights girl: you want to hear something trivial? boy: what? girl: your penis

how do you kill a blonde? hit her in the back repeatedly with a crowbar

why was little bobby sad? he accidentally super-glued Jupiter to his forehead.

Q: What do you call a black guy with an air plane? A: A pilot you racist bastard!

Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

What does two plus two equal? 4

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? The pizza does not scream in the oven

its all aodhan

Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

what does the black man say to the white man? nice weather were having huh.

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

Person 1- your face is a stupid joke Person 2- you're right, because it's not a joke its a face

Where do penguins keep their money? No where. Penguins don't have a money economy

What is funnier than 24? The fact that you think numbers are funny?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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