What is red and can fly? An elephant. I lied about being red. And I also lied about the flying part.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

There are 3 types of people in this world, those who can count to potato and those who can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Q. What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? A. I don't were cleats when I jump on my trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Leave. Now.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

what did the train say to the other train choo chooo

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had a gun to its head

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Doris was putting up Christmas lights when he noticed the bulb's suddenly came on. He was puzzled at first, as he hadn't plugged them in. He climbed down the ladder and found that it was his son, Robby who had plugged the lights in.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Your mother is so fat, she tried to suicide because she was unhappy with her weight. She tried a diet and it didn't work; she suffers from depression and went to see a doctor about her weight. Life is getting worse for your mother and she is starting to develop diabetes. Your relatives and cousins are going to the hospital to visit her sometime this week; the doctor says she only has about a week left before she passes away.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I went to school. Then I came home.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

balls in ya mouf

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A: Knock! Knock! B: Who's there? A: Kitchen B: Kitchen who? A: GET THERE!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dyeing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: What can you never see in the light, but you can in the dark? A: Darkness.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the man get when he returned from Africa? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops