How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

Sarah Palin is President

Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

A boy with one arm walks into a rock climbing facility and quickly realizes that his dream of being a rock climber is impossible because he is blind.

Murray Harnett Smells like a dirty Burringbar Whore!

On the dora show when they asked where the Monster was why did the arrow point left instead of right?? Because it was scared

Why did the black guy drown in the river?? unfortunately he owed 10,000 dollars to a loan shark and couldnt pay his dues So he was tied to an anchor and put in the river.

Why did the black man break a woman's ribs? Cardiovascular resuscitation is an emergency procedure often used outside of hospitals to revive unconscious individuals before medical professionals are able to intervene. Sometimes having your life saved comes at a cost.

A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

why was their a child on the sun? There wasn't he would be incinerated

Yo Mamma's so dumb... She cannot manage to find a decent job without her GED.

Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

Q: What did the hobo get for Christmas? A: Hypothermia.

The king asked the jester why was he not telling jokes. He wasn't because he's a jester and therefore is obligated to be funny.

What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? Doormat.

Quantum Mechanics is so difficult to understand, somewhere Stephen Hawking just walked into a bar.

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have a gun, So get in the van

How do you get a chicken to cross the road? Get him in the other side

Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset in her backyard Neither did she.

Two women are sitting quietly in a corner, minding their own business.

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? ...hey, it's kinda fun to type tootsie... ...tootsie tootsie tootsie...

What does Free Candy and a Free game online have in common? They both have viruses

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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