roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

If an atom bomb falls in a town, does it make a sound? Not to most people, as they would be killed in a massive catastrophe that will be etched into their ancestors minds for years to come, not to mention radiation poisoning and deformation.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

Whats worse that biting into an apple with a worm in it? The Holocaust.

What did the black man get his mom for Mother's Day? Some jewelry and a very nice card.

I would tell you a joke about a pencil but there would be no point.

Why Did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, the chicken is dead.

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

Who needs god when coffee is cheaper

Q. Why did the 8 year old girl scream and cry when she was raped? A. I no idea either. I drugged her and taped her mouth closed.

why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

Pi = Pie, something everybody likes.

What did the man say to the other man? I am unsure of what he said, but it seemed like a pretty nice conversation until one of the men got hit by a elephant.

A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

a man shoots his mother in-law He his charged with murder and will only be eligible for parole in 18 months

What's the difference between a table lamb? A fishing pole, automobiles are very useful

What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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