A duck walks into a bar. The duck walks over to the bartender and orders a beer. "put it on my bill." he says. The bartender angrily grabs the duck and kicks him out of the bar, because the duck has done this many times, but has never once paid his bill to the bar. The duck is an alcoholic and is slowly ruining his relationship with his family.

?u?? ????? ????? '?? p??? o? u?op ?p?sdn s??? p?dd??? no? ??

Whats something thats red and swings A baby on a meat hook

what's the difference between a lamborghini and you're mother. cars don't scream when you rape them

Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive traits.

A hot girl walks by a boy and he stares at her as she walks past. She see's him and asks "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied "Oh I'm sorry. You happened to look familiar and I thought 'Perhaps I've met this person before. School? No. Work? No. I then concluded I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at".

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open it.

What did the cowboy say when he went into the car showroom in Germany? He commented on the models and designs, and asked to try a few out. Then he left, saying he would consider buying one but didn't want to commit too suddenly or too soon.

What's Black white and red all over? Half a penguin

How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

How did the black man cross the Atlantic? He did not. He drowned

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? Neither have i

Why does Beyonc'e sing ''to the left to the left''? Because black women have no rights.

What did the lawyer say to a lawyer? We're both lawyers.

What's worse then finding out that your partner has AIDS? I don't know actually, but finding out would suck pretty bad...

Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car and die.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

One day i woke up, and found my wife dead on the floor. lol.

what's 6 inches long and women love? my penis

What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or words that begin with "F" and end in "uck." So you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

Roses are red violets are purple what the hell happened to your ugly face

jordan godfrey is good looking lolololol

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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