Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red, HOLY SHIT THE GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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Why is SkrillEX bad at fishing? S EX

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Person 1: So now that were friends on facebook, you wanna hang out? Person 2: No I'd rather not.

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why did the girl go into the kitcen? she was preparing a meal for her well safisticated family which had not ate dinner yet that day.

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Why can't basketball players play hockey? Because hockey and basketball season occur at the same time.

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Person 1: I got a really good knock, knock joke. Person 2: Okay. Person 1: You start. Person 2: Knock, knock. Person 1: Who's there? Person 2: ...

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Yo mama is so fat, she's bigger than a whale. I have two fathers.

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How many Lepers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? People with leprosy should not be doing general house keeping.

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their was a black man in my family tree hes still hanging on

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What's big, green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree will kill you? A pool table

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... Your mom's a wh0re.

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why didn't santa deliver any presents this christmas? Because he isn't real

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Q: What did Delaware? A: A black dress. She was on her way to her father's funeral.

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What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

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Why did the guy in the wheelchair die? He was mauled by tigers.

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A blonde, a brunette and a red-head find a mirror with a message on it that says "Stand in front of the mirror and say something you think is true. If it is true, I'll grant you a wish. If it is wrong, you'll be sucked inside the mirror and be trapped there forever." The blonde, who is standing in front of the mirror, says "I think this is a stupid joke." and nothing happened.

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What did the man get when he found a genie in a lamp? The rest of his life in an asylum for schizophrenia.

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What did you get for your birthday? I got older

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Andy: Mom, I wish I was a dinosaur. Mom: Aw, that's cute! Why? Andy: Because dinosaurs do not suffer from terminal pancreatic cancer.

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A chicken walks into asda/walmart The person at the counter says: "What can I get you?" The chicken says: "Cluck"

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Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a fried chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

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What happened when the Irish ran out of potatoes? Millions starved.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&Ms factory? Because she slapped the boss when he made a pass at her. Afterwhich she reported the incident to her Union and the boss was fired for Sexual Harassment. She was then rehired with a substantial increase in salary.

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A man walks into a bar. His friend follows him in, but the first man doesn't know he's there. They both order a beer, then a couple strong shots. The first man then notices his friend, and they exchange high-fives. The man's friend says, "Hey, how ya doin?" The first man says, "Okay, I guess, but I forgot the punchline." So the second man orders his friend the strongest drink, and the weakest. He replies, "Me too, Joe. Meeeeee, too."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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