What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

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guess what what ...

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so a black,Hispanic,chines,white and Asian man walk into a bar and they sat down had a couple drinks and had a good conversation and left as happy as could be

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A girl hands her boyfriend her phone and says it's his dad. He throws it on the ground exclaiming, "My dad's not a phone, duh!"

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

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what did hayley say to missy last night? I'm tired bye

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knock knock who's there? john john who? john opens his mouth only to be gunned down by a terrorist attack

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

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And you honored it I see :P

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What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

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What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

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A muslim walks out of a plane.

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Two peanuts walked into a bar one was as'salted'

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz "Somebody left the gate open"

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Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

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Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

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What happened to the boy after he ate a piece of Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

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What did Helen Keller say to her friend? Nothing. If you didn't know, she was deaf and blind so she had to use Sign Language.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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