Q. What is a brown cow called? A. A cow.

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A dog walks into a bar. The bartender asks the dog "what will ya have?" The bartender is then recognized as The Dog Whisperer

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Have you seen the movie "Constipation?" No. It hasn't come out yet! Of course there is no such movie in production and no plans for such a movie exist.

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What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

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What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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Q.) How do you make a whore blush? A.) Tell her she has pretty eyes.

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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whats the difference between a bird and a turtle? they can both fly but the turtle cant

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What's the difference between you and yourself? Yourself has 4 more letter in it.

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What did the kid tell his father? Go away, I'm watching elmo!

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Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

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A bear eats some honey. I'm not really sure why and I've never seen a bear eat honey in real life so I don't really know if the bear actually ate any.

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What's the most common pickup line in a gay bar? "Hi, may I buy you a drink?"

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A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

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What's worse than forgetting to charge your cell phone battery? Getting wrongfully accused and going to jail and get raped by inmates for the rest of your life.

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What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

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What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

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Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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