what's worse than getting a paper cut? Hiroshima

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what r the two best ways to describe a guy whose eating a bannana while peeing, time conservative and a multitasker

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how did the man with the gun die? obesity

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Boobs are nasty!

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what do you call a bunch of black people in a pool cocoa puffs

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Why was the baby crying? Because you repeatly hit it in the face with a brick, you sick freak.

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Why didn't the boy finish his homework? He was in a coma.

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whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings. whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 beestings

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume

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You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

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Three blondes are walking through the woods when the come upon a set of tracks. The blondes stepped away from the tracks to watch the train as it went by.

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What's black and blue, and read all over? The Merriam-Webster dictionary.

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What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

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What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

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What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

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knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

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An american took a vacation to Mexico.... the American police were contacted 3 days later... the American was supposedly killed during a drug trade...

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Q: humpty dumpty sat on a wall A: yeah right

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A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: a half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee and a 1 lb. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, “You must be single.” The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict’s intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said “Well, you know what, you’re absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?” The drunk replied, “Cause you’re ugly.”

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Why doesnt Santa deliver presents to black children Because santa doesnt exist

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Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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What does a snake and a dog have in common? They are both reptiles but except the dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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