what was the dying mans last words? im dying

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YOUR MOTHER IS SO FAT that she sought a relevant support group. My understanding is that she tried Overeater's Anonymous and lost a few pounds, but it meant more that it improved her sense of self-worth. She's more comfortable with herself as a somewhat overweight woman, and a much happier person now. We're all very proud of her.

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Your mother's so fat that affects her self esteem.

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What's worse than a bee sting? Getting shot in the head

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Why is the sky blue? Because bicycles have two tires

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to go well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that when his wife was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas, despite that the tank was full and she only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrendous car accident that caused the fuel to empty and catch fire. Mary survived but their 6 month old baby was killed.

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how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

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What is black and bad for your teeth? A cannon ball

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A guy walks into the bathroom, sits down and poops.

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What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

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Yo Mama is so ugly she wears a mask on halloween

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What did hitler say when he spilt coffee all over himself Ow I am burnt

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why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

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How did OJ get away with murder? No one really knows. Probably because he an excellent group of lawyers

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What did Sam Houston Say to Jim Bowie when he say all the Mexicans coming Towards the Alamo? That's a lot of Mexicans.

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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why was the old man on the ground he fell

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q. a whale walks into a bar. The bartender asks"why are you wailling?" A. I my 3 year-old son died.

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I saw a man lying on the floor. He was dead.

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Girl 1- why was 6 afraid of 7? dog- ..................................(doesn't say anything because dogs can't ruff)

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Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

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why do fat people eat so much? who cares

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars...except for the duck

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Hey babe, do you like going to sleep without shoes on? Because most people find it more comforting to remove footwear in order to rest and relax peacefully during bedtime.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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