A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme but this one doesn't

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What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

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no rasist joks

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what's funnier than the holocaust? 2 holocausts and 9/11

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What's red and creeps up your leg? A homesick abortion.

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a blond makes out with ron every sunday and she stops every time to remember that she put the cheese in the wrong compartment brick house cheese is sad!

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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What do Muslims and Jews have in common? Shared humanity.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - To rape you. Knock Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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Why did the cop pull the black guy over because he was speeding

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once upon a time there was a girl named katie. she walked across the road. she got hit by a truck. now she's in heaven. the end,.

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why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock. whos there? not suzy.

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Why did the tortoise cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Frog-why did the chicken cross the road Chicken-dont judge me...

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what worse then stepping on a lego? watching your son kill your wife

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Why did the man stay in the basement? Because he was addicted to pornography and it was tearing his family apart. Eventually he was unable to tell the diffidence between fantasy and reality and sexually assaulted his 13 year old niece.

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Knock knock? Who's there? A Jehovah's Witness. Oh. Knock knock? Who's there? Not me!

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Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

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What do you call a lawyer without a brain? -Dead

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A bear comes across some people on a camping trip. But he then promptly leaves, because bears aren't inherently aggressive unless caring for their young or if they are provoked.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

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How do I make my penis 12 inches? Tug on it.

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Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He got cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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