What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy??? Just different pigmentation of their skin.

What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

husband : honey , can i have stuff candy wife : no husband : can i have milk and cookies wife : what kind of milk wink wink husband 2% you pervert

roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

why did the jew cross the road? the ss was chasing him and his family to kill him so he ran across the street to same his family, he got hit by a truck and his family was killed...

What do you call a black man with no arms? Trustworthy.

what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

Why did the man scream? because he was run over.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

whats hairy and fat? I DONT KNOW YOU TELL ME RETARD

A car walks into a bar.

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face", the horse replies I have an extra 21st chromosome.

a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

Why do you not play poker with a cheetah. 1. Animals can't play card games. 2. Cheetahs are carnivores. Think about it.

Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

There are 500 bricks on an airplane. If you drop one out, how many are left? 499. There are three steps to putting an elephant in a refrigerator. What are they? Open the fridge, put the elephant in, close the fridge. There are four steps to putting a deer in the fridge. What are they? Open the fridge, take the elephant out, put the deer in, close the fridge. The Lion King is having a birthday party. All the animals are there but one. Why is that? The deer is in the fridge. A woman wants to cross an alligator infested swamp. How does she do it? She crosses normally because the alligators are at the Lion King's party. She dies anyways. Why? She gets hit in the head with a brick.

What did the sailor say to the shore? Ur a beach!

Jennifer Kim is the nicest person I have ever met, everyone loves her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...