How do you wake up your snoring friend? Cut his feet off.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Poetry is hard And so is wood

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is in an abusive relationship and drinking her pain away.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Robin get in the car"

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Why did the Asian man open up a Sushi restaurant? Because he had a fetish for cumming in sushi and giving it to strangers.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Bat-mobile? - "Robin, get in the Bat-mobile"

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How old are you? 7

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Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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What didn't the man piss on the dead baby? Because that is just morally wrong. Instead, he reported it to the police and aided the cause of justice.

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Why was the prostitute's throat sore? Allergies.

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What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

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Malcolm Johnson from Zenith windows, I was wondering if I could speak to you for a while about some fantastic offers which we currently have on double glazed windows....

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Why did Colussi miss school for 2 years? -Because he died

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A horse walks into a bar. A chicken crosses the road. Humanity is no more. Nature reclaims the Earth.

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You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

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A panda walks into a bar, orders some bamboo shoots, and bamboo leaves, and eats them

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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My name is Corey, and I am Dickbang Majestic. Q: Who is Dickbang Majestic? A: Corey is.

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A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

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Holy shit Lawman! Next thing we know Nero comes back from the death! Seriously get over here stat and get "my men" under control here! So that last damn Moral was for you! I never understood why he picked me, so he never picked me at all... Man am I relieved! Do you ever fucking get tired of playing the hero? I basically ended up declaring war on Nero`s on people here, what should I do?

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What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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