Why was the boy sad? His parents died in a horrible accient earlier that day.

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What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had just been to their father's funeral, who was a Welshman.

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies? girl scouts

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What is pink, red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in it's eyes

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

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I'M JOSH BROWN!!!!!

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whats the differences between an atari and a xbox 360 i don't know i'm not a video game nerd

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FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

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feminine literature

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your mom is so old, she is often confused for your grandmother.

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Why was Susan tied up on the railroad tracks? Because she was a blonde and her dad told her it was a roller coaster.

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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What is pretty, has big tits, talks like a guy, and has a dick? Your mom giving me a handjob.

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Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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Q: What did the angry German man say to the Ameican? A: I dont know, I can't speak German!

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i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

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Why was Veronica lying on the sidewalk? She was just in a drive-by shooting.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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roses are red, violates are blue, you left me for David, I am about to kill you *bam* *bam**bam*

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When I meet the woman of my dreams, she wont know what hit her... Nor will the police.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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What's the difference between a terrorist and Bill Gates? One founded a successful software company, and the other commits mass murder of civilians for political gain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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