How did the man rob the bank? With a gun

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What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney? Nothing chimneys don't talk

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Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

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Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

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What does a kangaroo and a zucchini have in common? Neither one can ride a bike.

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Two men are making sandwiches, one man is spreading peanut butter over the bread and the other man is spreading honey and Italian raspberry jam over rye bread. the man with the peanut butter sandwich looks over and says "HEY, where did you get the rye bread?" and the man with the rye bread says "well my wife made it yesterday and I would be delighted if you come over for some tea, and tried some of my wife's homemade rye bread".

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Why is Obama Care a lie? Cuz he doesn't care!

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

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Roses are cheap Violets are on sale It's Boxing Day Please buy my flowers I really need the cash.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is no longer alive.

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What did the cow call the hen? A hen, what else would you call it?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

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An Asian man fails a math test

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. So is my eye. I get abused.

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What did one eye say to the other? Nothing. Because eye's can't talk.

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There are three muffins sitting in an oven. The first one says nothing. The second one also says nothing. They're just muffins and muffins can't talk.

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A boy walks to the bark and on his way he sees two individuals having sex in a car. He runs home and asks hios mother what he saw. She responds vinny is an enormous dork

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A mexican goes to an ATM.

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You know why no ones tried to kill Obama ? Picture him in an escalade!

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Hot Lady: What do you do for a living? Guy: Phosphorus, Oxygen, and Radon. Hot Lady: So you are a chemist? Guy: Think again! Think about Acronyms... Hot Lady: OPRa, so Opera correct? Guy: (Obviously talking to a Blonde) P, O, Rn Hot Lady: So, you are a chemistry teacher! Guy: (Sighs to himself thinking how PORn relates to chemistry. Which it does in biochemistry, but he does not know that).

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i used to think i had the coolest secret handshake with helen keller. then i realized she was talking sh*t about me

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What do silly people in a monastery say? stop munkying around.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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