A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

A teen walks in on his parents having sex. He then vomits in his mouth and shuts the door.

Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why couldn't she get back up? She blew up

So everything, the chat we had before was all you know, a game so I would call you? I am not sleepy but I can wait until you can confirm everything.

Why is Brendan stupid. Because he's mentally retarded due to the fact he was dropped as a chil.d

Your mom's so old she sometimes uses outdated racial slurs loudly in public. It can get pretty embarrassing.

Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

Why wouldn't Rose let go of Jack? Freddie told her that he was just a poor boy and nobody loves him.

A chicken crossed the road. It was run over before reaching the other side. by fast asleep

I got into an argument with my friend the other day. He contested that the onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I beat his wife to death with a coconut,

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

Q: What's green and goes round and round and round? A: A baby on a blender

Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

If your scared of paedophiles..... grow up

George Bush told Jared Fogle that he did 9/11. Jared Fogle replied "I did 9 11 year olds"

Cody went to the store. Big Floppy Donkey Dick.

Siete inglesi quindi non sapete nemmeno cosa c'è scritto ? Succhiacapre che non siete altro.

50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

Where there is a will, there is generally a grieving family... I miss you, dad.

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Sorry, what? your door is kind of thick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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