What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did the coal miner get for Christmas? Black Lung Disease

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I have a dig bick You that read wrong You read that wrong too You read that again to make sure I'm not fucking with you

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why does the groom wear a black tux? Because he knows a funeral when he sees one.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I once went seven years without sex, then I turned eight and my uncle raped me.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Charlie Sheen walks into a bar... Every morning, and stays until it closes... [credit gilbert gottfried]

thumb_up thumb_down -11

So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why was the man so good at holding stuff? he was born with 4 arms!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I went to Nebraska and saw a dead squirrel

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What happen when a plane crash? Everyone on it died...

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what's yellow, dirty, and looks like a potato? a potato

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Whatever his name happens to be.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why didn't the boy blow out his birthday cake this year? He died last year.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: why did the plane crash? A: because jack daniels equals 7

thumb_up thumb_down -65

How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats black and gay? Obama

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What did the girl without arms get for her birthday? A pair of gloves.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

knock knock whose there? my penis.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops