What did the pig say after having sex? "Oink".

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I like my woman like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

women rights

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's woman spelled backwards? Sandwich-maker.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

thumb_up thumb_down +28

your mother is such a nice person that most people enjoy her company

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the black man smell really bad? A: becuase he ran out of paper

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

thumb_up thumb_down

69

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How dead people are in a graveyard? All of them

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the man think inside of the box? Because he was inside of the box.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

EVERYBODY GIVE THIS A THUMBS UP AND SEND IT TO YOUR FRIENDS AND LETS SEE IF WE CAN TAKE OVER THE MOST LIKED JOKE.

thumb_up thumb_down -421

What did the joke writer with A.D.D say refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -10

1 woman and 2 guys were on a roadtrip. Every single day they would go do the same things. First go to Denny's, then to the mall, then see a horror movie. One day the woman said, "I don't want to go see the horror movie, I'm scared enough!" So the guys agreed that they'd trick the woman into going to a horror movie before Denny's. They went, and the woman was scared out of her mind. She yelled at them both for 30 minutes and to this day never speaks to them.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

When life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the apple say to the pear? Fred, you are going insane and i'm getting a divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor, You've been diagnosed with venereal disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops