A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

What did Thisara say? You cant see me bich

What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

A Man walks into a car dealership and asks the salesman "How many of these Blue ones do you have in stock" ? The salesman looks at the Man and begins to cry. "Why are you crying" asks the Man "I had a dog named Blue once" replied the salesman. And then he ate a taco in front of the Man,wiped his hands on his slacks and slowly backed away from him. The Man thought to himself..."Gee I'm hungry" and left the car dealership to go buy a taco instead.

Why do cats have eyes? So they can see.

What does society have in common with laundry? They both get ruined when you mix colors with whites.

Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

A local police officer pulls up to tell you something. Listen carefully: Three zebras have been spotted crossing the Mexican border. He goes into his truck, pulls out a can of marbles, peanut butter, seven velcro straps and a rhino horn covered in glitter. Your mission is simple: Kill the zebras using your equipment. You will be rewarded if you have enough peanut butter to make a sandwich after. Go now... Get it done.

what did the downsindrome get for christmas?? A: Aids and a Dead wife

Why Do Black Men Like Koolaid Because its red

I once had a friendly cohort, whose limericks often ran short, but this one doesn't, I don't know why, Also, he often can't rhyme.

Why did Margret eat the banana? She was hungry.

i love to lick...

What do you call a man with no heart? Dead

What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

"why did the chicken cross the road?" "to get to your house" "knock knock" "who's there?" "The chicken"

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

what is the best invention ever created ? ............ PORN !!!!

Roses are blue Violets are buckets this poem makes no sense Washing machines

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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