Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Why doesnt Santa deliver presents to black children Because santa doesnt exist

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Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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What does a snake and a dog have in common? They are both reptiles but except the dog.

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doctor doctor i need help i stay up all night dancing what is it? dance fever! HAHAHAHA its fatal.

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Why did Jane break up with DeShawn? Cause they grew apart

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots? It depends on what his name is.

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A. Did you hear about the circus fires? b. They were intense. (in tents)

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What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

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What is a dog? Bark

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Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

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What is a 6.9? A period getting in the way of a good time!

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How many apple does it take to turn a fridge into a water buffalo? Yellow tactics because of the Minty fragrance

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a boy walks over to the living room and shouts " happy birthday, daddy!!" the response is "i'm a cup, therefore i do not have a birthday because i am an inanimate object."

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My penis is small, Just kidding, it's huge.

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? Because he was mentally handicaped

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What's the difference between a Lawyer and a hooker? Job description, income, and an incredibly large list of other things.

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Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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If it looks like grass, smells like grass, and tastes like grass... Then you were honestly misled when ordering that salad.

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a man walk into a bakery, he sais... may i have a loaf of bread....

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Why couldnt the man stop dancing? He had Parkinson's.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops