Knock knock. Who's there? Hatch. Hatch who? God bless you.

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How do you kill Osama Bin Laden? Get The Navy Seals To Infiltrate his compound.

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why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

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jibby jobby

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how did the man die from falling out of the window his angry x- friend pushed him.

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What did the strawberry say to the elephant? Nothing. Because it's a strawberry and strawberries can't talk.

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Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

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An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

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That awkward when you adimaticlly read "moment in your head because you have seen too many of these awkward moment jokes.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

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Why did Lisa fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms... A: Knock Knock B: Whos there? A: Definitely not Lisa....

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so a piece of grass is walking down the street..... wait a minute thats not right.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

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Q: What's the difference between a basket of tennis balls and a basket of dead baby heads? A: One is used for the sport of tennis the other is a basket of tennis balls!

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What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

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What do you call a black man in a police car? Officer.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

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What happened to the man who just took a shit? He got a stunning pain in his anus because the earlier Hemorrhoid issues had now turned in to a open wound around his Anoderm.

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Why did the blind man drown? Because he couldn't swim.

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

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how do you confuse a brunette? tell a joke about how there are no beaches in florida

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops