Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

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GADZOOKS!

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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If you looked up stupid in Webster's dictionary, you wouldn't see a picture of yourself, because Webster's dictionary doesn't have pictures.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? When you think that there is no worm in your apple, but after your second bite you look down in disgust as you notice you have eaten half of the worm and see the other half wriggling about in your apple.

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Pickles

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why is 6 afraid of 7? because 6 is a capitalist and 7 is a communist

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What did the transvestite say to the hypochondriac? "Ever been to Toledo?"

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Who are you texting? YOUR MOTHER.

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women's rights

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Q: How do you stop a hobo from stealing your money A: You steal the hobo

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Jesse's mom is so god damn fat that it is an extreme danger just being around her

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Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

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Why Is Helen Keller such a bad driver? Because she is a woman

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A wooly mammoth and a dodo bird walk into a bar. Just kidding.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A very unfortunate blind fish.

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That guy is so lame, he needs a wheelchair to go places.

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When he was a little boy, what was Chaz Bono's favorite Cher song? Chaz Bono was never a little boy, he was a girl.

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Q: why did the black man cry when he went to bed? A: he had just had a visit from the police and apparently his family had been tragically killed in a car accident.

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What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a cheese grader? How the hell should i know?

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DON'T READ THIS!!! you suck.

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Q: Why did the kid cross the playground? A: To get to the other slide

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Why did the old woman fall down She got shot

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What's black white and red all over A Nun after being pushed down the stairs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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