My grandma's star sign was cancer, and it was really ironic how she died, actually... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Womens rights.

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a man walks into a house... then realizes its not his house and leaves.

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what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? I agree to the terms of service.

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Why did 16-year-old girl scream in the basement? She was being raped.

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Q: What did the monkey say to the parrot? A: I like trains so feed me bananas!

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Roses are red lemons are sour open Your legs and gimme an hour!

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A guy finds a genie bottle. He rubs it. A genie appears and grant him 3 wishes. He wishes for a splendid woman, a lot of money, and a house.

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If a tree falls on a woman and there's no one around to hear her scream why did a tree fall in the kitchen?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a rapist

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You know how to torture Hellen Keller? -No. Put a plunger in the toilet.

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Hey Patrick Yeah? I found something funnier then 24 Give it to me buddy 25

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What's the difference between George Washington and Wiz Khalifa? George Washington died many years ago.

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What's black, white,and red all over? A crime scene where a black and white man were brutally murdered by a psychopath that is still on the loose and could be killing someone else.

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So my teacher came upto me, and says "At the end of this ruler is a idiot" so I said "Which end?" I got detention.

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1: Knock Knock. 2: Who's there? 1: To. 2: To Who? 1: To whom.

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You are in England which has a law about not moving traffic when these idk some kinda swans cross the road. You see a fat woman in a car and she is waiting for the swans to cross the road and she can't drive the car else she would get in trouble by law. What do you do? Feed her

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Quetzalcoatl. Quetzalcoatl who? Quetzalcóatl, Mayan name Kukulcán, (from Nahuatl quetzalli, “tail feather of the quetzal bird [Pharomachrus mocinno],” and coatl, “snake”), the Feathered Serpent, one of the major deities of the ancient Mexican pantheon. Oh... hi.

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69

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Laughter and joy... You are really sweet you know.. Excuuuse me princess! But Like Mickey Mouse never changed... From a Potato peeler to some fuckup private detective in a trenchcoat. So tell me, what character did Walt Disney draw before Mickey Mouse?

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Holocaust jokes aren't funny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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