Why couldn't Jimmy's bedroom door close? Because it had a tree blocking it.

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why is everyone always picking on ruth? because they just do

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

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What do you call a bad anti joke? And anti joke

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A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

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An old white lady falls on the ground in the middle of the night. Just then, two positively huge black men in hoodies walk up to her and she is frightened. But as it turned out, they just wanted to help her get on her feet, and called a taxi for her. When she had no money, they gladly paid her fare. This is because they're good people and not muggers

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What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

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Why was the girl crying? She got shot in the penis

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Knock, knock Who's there? The electrician And about bloody time too, you'd better come in.

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Knock Knock, Come in.

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What' do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's puzsy

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what did the turnip say to the plum? nothing, as most fruits and vegetables would've said

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A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

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Why did the cat die? Johnny put in the microwave.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He was shot. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He was mentally disturbed. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

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Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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why do we have school? 2 learn duh y r u even askin? ur STOOPIDE!

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What did the abortion clinic serve at the cafeteria? Fetus soup

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What's worse than being a jew in the holocaust Being born black

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what is patrick wilson? smart

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Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

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Why did the man get ran over by th STREET? Because he crossed the TURTLE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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