Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

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A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

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What do you can an astronaut with an apple? Never mind, I have a boner.

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Guest what in the butt

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Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

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Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

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What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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Person 1: Why do eskimos wash their clothes in tide? Person 2: It works very well.

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What did the fish say to the octopus? nothing... fish cant talk.

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what's worse than finding a truck full of dead babys taking them out with a pitchfork

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An atmosphere goes into one bar. Which is pretty normal since it is roughly the regular value of the atmospheric pressure on Earth at sea level

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...The new series of spinoff movies from the worlds most frightening franchise! Pretty Normal Activity: Doing the groceries *****-Did not scare me at all :D! Ballbusters movie rentals *****- The demon never showed up which made this the scariest movie ever! Could not sleep for months... Whatyumean there is nothing paranormal in this? Aww FU*beep*CK!! Sumgay Inthestreet Journal *****-Pissed myself just from hearing the title got a stroke and almost died!, was it another Paranormal movie you said? Most overhyped comment we could find. Goddamn exaggerated movie reviews that fooled me into buying the original and expect something actually scary :(

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What is white on top and black on bottom? Society

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Your mamas so fat, she was self-conscious about her weight and became an antisocial vegetable.

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A pornstar walks into a church, she has remained close to Christ despite her condescending career choice.

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Why did the white kids accept Morgan Freeman as a kid? All of his school-mates looked up to him

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What do you call a man with 3 arms, 6 ears, 9 fingers, and a red clown nose? His name.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

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What's red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple? The Color Wheel.

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how do you make a baby cry? throw bricks at his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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