It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

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Q: What's the hardest part about throwing a baby down the stairs? A: My dick.

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What do a bike and a human have in common they are both objects

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a mosque.

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Why did the black man get drenched by a fire hose because he was on fire

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Ask me if i am a tree are you a tree? no

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why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get to chicken to have safe sex

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A Jewish guy walked into a bar... and said "ow"

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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Yeah I was beginning to enjoy that as well, but I used "timed hypnosis" I have not seen it been coined elsewhere yet, not that I learn hypnosis anymore, I kinda teach it covertly to whoever I believe can use it responsively. "Timed hypnosis" is not really based upon a set amount of time after all time is relative, and our subconcious does know that and the subconcius understands that we did not invent time just because we made some fucking dials spin around" Now, timed hypnosis is based on a purpose, for example: "I will go into a trance until I am done teaching my new buddy how covert hypnosis works and teach her to use it subconciously" But now I made you aware of that, so you can use it consciously as well, the real magic here is that the subconcious is so much more efficient and powerful than the conscious mind that it would not even be neccesary to have a concious mind, except for one thing.

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When life gives you lemons, you are probably crazy because life cannot give you lemons.

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Why did Gina laugh? Because something was funny.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree," "Are you a tree?" "No."

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There was this fruit joke, but it had no punchline.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who?

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what do you call a newborn baby? anything you want.

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there once was a man from Afghanistan. Who wanted to bang his brother-istan. they licked and sucked. and kissed then f**ked, he got aids. and never did that-again!

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What do you call a black man wearing tights? Rick

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How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

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Why did the little girl cry? Because she saw her future.

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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What's black and is hanging from a tree in my backyard? Avocados.

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A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Woof.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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