Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was Lucile crying? Because she was sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what do you get when you mix a shit zoo and a pitbull......"bull shit" oh this joke sucks well my life is over

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as it is capable of. Personally depends on the weight of the wood.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's brown and sticky A stick

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q:How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She didn't, she sought help and was able to live a very happy life with a beautiful family in a nice suburb outside of Cincinnati.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What gas station can u make a Kwick trip at? Kwick trip

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Why does Matt Daly do in his free time? it involves his finger and his own buttwhole

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A cat walks into a bar and says.......Meow

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a sludge hammer, the other is a watermelon

thumb_up thumb_down -42

A black man is driving a nice car when he's suddenly pulled over by the police. "Do you know why I pulled you over?" asks the cop. "No officer" replies the black man. "You have a taillight out. However I'm going to just let you off with a warning because you seem like an upstanding citizen. Have a nice day."

thumb_up thumb_down -33

person 1:hello person 2:hello person 1:do you want to hear a joke ? person 2:yes person 1:good bye person 2:good bye

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man walk to the store and buys some clothes.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's straight and famous. Ryan Secrest I was just kidding about the stright

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a feminist that believes that all women have just as many rights as men? Stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a Black guy who flies planes? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Is your refrigerator running? If so, it sounds like you've got a well manufactured, correctly working appliance. If not, you might want to either have a technician come over and look at it or you should simply replace it with a working one.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

69

thumb_up thumb_down -17

So, there was two successful business men at a social gathering when one leans in to the other to comment, "Hey, that women over there, she looks like your wife!" to which the other one replies, "That is my wife."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you get when you eat a bag of potatoes? The're all gone.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink. (Don't ask me how that's possible, just go with it) As the bartender is pouring it, he asks "Why the long face?" The horse responds "My son died of cancer this morning..."

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops