My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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Why are black people good at basketball? They practice

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Whats the differense between a pile of dead babies and a Farrari I actually have a Farrari in my garage.

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Why did the black guy buy a bucket of KFC? Because he was hungry

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Q: Where do you go when its cold? A: A corner because its 90 degrees.

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Wanna hear a joke? Fifa price ranges.....:(

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AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

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what do you get if you cross the mafia and the yakuza? a hefty bounty on your head

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What's worse than being a Jew in the Holocaust? Nothing.

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A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

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What do you say when the cheese isn't yours? The cheese does not belong to me.

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didn't she get back on the swing? cause she had no legs. Why didn't anyone help her up? Cause she had no friends. Why did she stay their all night? cause she had no family.

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An Irishman, an American, an Australian, a Chinese man, a Turk, a Brazillian, a Canadian, a Jew, an African, a German, a Mexican, a Norweigian, a Swede, a Spaniard, a Russian and an Indian walk into a bar.

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Why did the banana rot? Because it didn't have any gills.

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Once upon a time, your face.

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Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

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What is the black mans favorite color? -Time for you to get a watch

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Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

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A tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it... Fall on top of a woman and crush her to death

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Knock knock Who's there? Brittney Spears Brittney Spears who? Knock Knock Who's there? Opps I did it again.

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What is green and had wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.....

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The elephant and the mouse was gonna go swimming at the lake, but they realize the Elephant forgot his swimming trunks! Mouse: Do you really need two trunks? Elephant: Oh well I can do with this one... but its not a swimming trunk! Mouse: Huh? Moral: Huh?

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What did the mexican firefighter name his 2 children? Jose and Juan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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