a priest, a bishop and a cardinal walk into bar to hand out pamphlets about alcoholism

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Q: Why did the dog bark? A: it cant talk.

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Why did the man go bra shopping? Cause he is a single father and his teenage daughter needs a new one.

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What is black, can fly and sing? R. Kelly.. "I believe I can fly"

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Why did the little girl cry? Her mom died

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Why couldn't Jenny speak right? Cause she had autism.

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What's long and black The unemployment line

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How do you keep someone in suspense? Refuse to let them view the resolultion of a gripping film.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because there were no cars coming

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Roses are Violets, Violets are Roses, I am a dumb ass, The Hobbit.

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69

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A man with no arms and no legs

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hey guys what's up?

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Sticks and stones may break my bones, But words can leave deep psychological wounds that may never heal.

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You're momma's so fat..Oh wait she's not.

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My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

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How do you sleep? With a knife I just saved a lot of money by switching to Geico......with a knife I'm going to the restroom, with a knife. How do you do a back flip with no hands? With a knife. What is 2 plus 2? The answer is 4, with a knife. Would like you like to go see a movie with me...with a knife? Today, I'm going to show you how bake a strawberry chocolate cake...with knife. I'm sorry, you have the wrong number...with a knife. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side....with a knife. A man walks to a bar and orders a shot of vodka....with a knife. Omg, I just saw Miley Cyrus at the mall today....with a knife. In Soviet Russia, blah blah blah, with a knife. How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? 1, with a knife. I'll be back in time for dinner, I'm going to the gym and work on my abs....with a knife.

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What's worse than falling in the mud whilst wearing a suit? Burying your parents.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jerry Jerry Who? Jerry Sandusky, I've come to rape your kids.

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What did the black man say when he ate a Hershey bar? Delicious

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A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

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Q: What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? A: Popcorn Q: What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? A: F'uck you -Ap

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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