99% of guys are hot. The other 1% go to my school.

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Two Jews walk into a bank. They make a deposit and leave.

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Which side of an ostrich has the most feathers? Obviously the outside! Who would be so low educated to even have the idea that an ostrich can have feathers on the inside of it's body?

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What do you call a black man carrying a T.V? Someone that is helping me move.

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Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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To girl in a bar: Grab your coat love... It's cold in my basement.

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What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Hola.

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Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

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What do you call a Mexican worked with a sweaty singlet? A Wetback

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Are you from Jamacia? Because I want to have sex with you.

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A man has 72 cookies, he eats 64 of them. What does he have left? Diabetes.

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Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and was forced to prostitute for money, thus resulting in you.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "What will it be tonight?" He then promptly remembers he is on anti-joke.co but is too late to react. The horse has already shit on the floor. This is the fifth time this week that this has happened.

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you haven't already said twice.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

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What's worse than losing $100 at the racetrack? Losing at Russian Roulette

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Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

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This is an anti joke with a difference. It's funny.

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Why are spanish people good at soccer? Hard work and a long-life time comitment

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how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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