Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

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I'm HIV positive.

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Why is it wrong to love your neighbour? You would be loving a dickhead.

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What did the cancer patient do during Willow Smith's "Whip My Hair"? -Nothing.

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The size of Idris Elba's penis

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A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot them in the head with a revolver.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

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How come the bartender didnt let the black guys in the bar Because the bar was closed.noone was aloud in the bar

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I just flew in from Seattle, and boy is their airport difficult to navigate.

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What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

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Whats has 6 wheels and can fly? A dumpster, I lied about the flying.

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Why did the other Albino cross the road? He was running away from a witch doctor who was going to brutally murder him and steal his body parts.

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Two goldfish are swimming in the ocean. One says to another, "I don't think we will be able to survive in this salty environment".

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What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? A long sleeve shirt

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Frontbut-

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What's the resemblance between a chicken? Its legs are approximately equal, especially the left one.

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Rebecca Black was taking a leisurely stroll on a Friday afternoon. She was consumed by a lion.

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Peter was sitting on a bench. He had a bag of 10 sweets and was eating them slowly. John and Anthony both wanted some, but Peter wanted to still have sweets left over. How many did he give them both? None. He's that selfish.

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What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

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Penis.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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