There once was a man called steve, His name was steve

Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

Knock Knock. Go away!

Knock Knock Who's there? Immigration. You're headed back to mexico.

The early bird gets the worm. The rest of them die of starvation.

Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

A new born baby is left alone in his crib after a long day of playing, He gets taken out of his crib for his first meal with his grandparents, he is excited, His grandparents come in and after the usual praising of the child they sit down for dinner, They are having chicken, His mother puts the spoon to his mouth, He chews it and swallows it, It gets stuck in his throat and he suffocates and dies.

thomas the train walked up to an old man and said nothing. mostly because trains cant walk, and they cant talk.

My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

Why did the black man give his seat to a white man? Because the white man had a leg injury, and the black man was being a courteous good samaritan.

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy This song doesn't rhyme PENIS

How do you kill yourself You jump of a cliff

I'm Coming

What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

A bartender walks up to a church and a synagogue

What do you call an old man who took too much viagra? And ambulance, because he could possibly get a heart attack from the fluctuations in blood pressure

Women's rights

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why did we start questioning the philosophical reasoning of chickens?

How did the chicken cross the road? By foot.

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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