Why did the clown want a new bike? Don't ask me, clowns are allowed to want things too

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Whats funnier than throwing a baby off the top of a building? The sound it makes when it hits the ground.

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Do you work at subway? Because you are giving me a footlong. Yes, please, on white bread, with turkey, ham, white cheddar, and all of the vegetables. Maybe a little bit of sweet onion sauce and sub sauce. Sure, that will be a combo with chips. Thank you very much.

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A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

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How do you get someone to come out of the closet? Unlock it

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roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

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Why did the man's legs start shaking when he saw the attractive women? There was an earthquake

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What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

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U mad?

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So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

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8=>

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

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Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

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What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

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Things that have changed since I was a kid. Turtles: My time, awesome. Today: Shredder is a human which is not a human but actually a Krang, but his daughter which is not his daughter because he is a freaking krang, has a sex thing for Leonardo which is a turtle (the blue one, whatever his name is). Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: My time? Well it was awesome back then, fine I admit it, I might have been a bit biased but still, I enjoyed the hell out of it, there where five rangers and yeah that Asian bitch that gave me a boner as a kid made a green one which she giftwrapped to the rest of the team, then some white ranger showed up... But I never watched anything with the white guy, I had lots interest years ago by then (Still play that fighting game for the Snes and thats why I know there is a fucking white ranger... And deathbattle okay) Today: Power Rangers Neon, Power Rangers Tetris, Power Rangers Ultra Power, Power Rangers Sexfighters, Power Rangers Nazi, Power Rangers Texas Rangers, Power Rangers Color, Power Rangers Multiforce Orbital Neo Neon.... And thats just like 03 percent of the variants right? Moral: As a kid we always had a lol when the Asian chick turned into Yellow ranger and did a split kick, which kinda revealed she had a massive dick between her legs... Later we understood that she was a he and that the Ranger Segments are recorded in Japan... Probably by a Hermafrodite... Nah, a guy fine. Oh, and we always lolled at how "gay" the original blue ranger acted he was supposed to be Nerd but I was like eight and was like "lol he just seems gay"... Just for it to turn out that he quit the series because supposedly the rest of the actors mocked him for being gay, Wow thats... Weird.

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They're both Tom Cruise.

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yo mama so fat, her favorite food is seconds.

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what did the asian father say to his son after getting a c+ on a test? son you are working hard and i know you will do well

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What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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a man i knew who was a real jerk was about to drive home drunk. i was trying to stop him, but then he punched me in the face. i let him through. he died that night. i texted him all the way

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike they both taste good

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Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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