What do you call a black priest? Holy s***

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Why did the woman go to the kitchen? The same reason she went to the bathroom, she needed to wash her hands because she was finger painting. Her husband was using the bathroom.

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Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

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A tortoise went for a run. It took him two hours to get around the corner.

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A man walks into a bar, he has a terrible drinking problem and he is ruining his family.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did the boy cry when he got a new puppy? Because he had anal seepage coming out his ass

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the awkward moment when a fat person says they are fat

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Your mom is so fat that she steps on the scale and sees a relatively large number compared to the rest of human society.

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Did you see Helen Keller at the movie theater? I didn't either, she's dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue...........Im wearing socks

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Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

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a man walks into a bar after a long day at work, and asks for a drink. he finishes, pays the bill and leaves a handsome tip for the bartender and heads home.

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what happened to the atheist when he died? he went to HELL

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A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

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Roses are red but violets arent blue!!!!!

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Burp

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What did Ann Frank say when she dropped her icecream Nothing because she was captured by Natzis

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Jews

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Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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What's worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "What'll it be?" The man quietly gazes out at the other people in the bar. He continues to do this for a while, until eventually the bartender calmly taps him on the shoulder to get his attention, and the man turns to look over at him. "What can I get you today?" He asks the man. "What?" the man replies. Turns out he's deaf. Who knew?

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hi penis ham telephone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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