What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

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What did the pirate order for breakfast? Pancakes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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BALL SO HARD... That I got kicked off the team for intentionally fouling other players whenever I got on the court, I'm sorry

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yo momma is soo stupid when anyone says anything she say i don't understand .

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Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

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An Irishman, a homosexual and a Jew walk into a bar. Paddy's really exploring his options lately.

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A black man and a white man walk into a bar, "what will it be" said the bartender. Milk, chocolate milk.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I Rape you!!!

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A woman walks into the living room while her husband is watching tv. The husband tells her "Make me a Sandwich", so she goes to the kitchen and makes him a sandwich like shes told to.

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What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

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Yo mums so fat she went on a diet.

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What's sad about an old black woman being hit by a Porsche? She was my third grade English teacher, and had a huge impact upon my life.

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How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

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Knock Knock. Whose there? ..............

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What did the house do when it came alive? It went home

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What's worse than eating cows. Death

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Why did Sally fall off a tree? The tree was a man wearing a tree costume and was sexually assaulting her with his branches. Sally fell off because the cops came and the man threw her down. The tree man is still on the loose. If you have any info please call crime stoppers.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

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What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

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SCENE: A prirate walks into a bar with the wheel of the ship attached to his pants. BARTENDER: Doesn't that hurt? PIRATE: Aye! It drives me nuts.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? No Neither did she

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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