What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

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What did the doctor say to his patient with cancer? "You have cancer...".

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what do you call a man with no @ss? d1ckhead

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Why does Michael Jackson like K-mart? He does not; he is dead.

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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a sabertooth walks into a club. the caveman set his trap perfectly.

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what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? The black man is a human being with all of man's well-deserved rights, and the large pizza is an edible item. Furthermore, the black man, if adult and employed, has the propensity to feed a family of four far longer than a large pizza can.

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i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

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what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

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Black Friday

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Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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Q: You know what you should add to your recipe? A: No, not really. Tell me. Q: What? Are you expecting an answer now? Why don't you just shoot me, huh?! Pee on my clothes and set them on fire! You racist son of an **orange**.... It certainly tastes better with oranges.

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A homosexual and a heterosexual bump into each other on the street. But its okay, because although they both lead very different lifestyles, they are open minded enough to respect each others choices and both apologize and keep walking.

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One day my dog ran away. We drove around for a long time looking for it.

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So a leg, an arm and a head win the Boston marathon. And I'm sitting here masturbating, ...

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A Jew and a German walk into a bar.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

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An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

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What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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