What is the difference between an African and French person? Nothing all people ate equal.

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How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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How do you take a shit?, by taking it to go.

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how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your carmel apple, which costs about 35 cents more on average.

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What would Billy Mays do if he were alive today? Yell.

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Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

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What did Helen Keller say to the little boy with cancer? Hudd Wahher shelper, ghh o.

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Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

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Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

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Penis

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Jews

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Why did the 80 year old man lose his vision? Because he recently blew his head off.

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A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

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An Irish man willingly walks out of a bar

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What is a vampire's favourite dessert? Vampires aren't real.

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You want to hear a joke? Republican

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What do call a limbless man swimming? Dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed? At the bottom.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Boom! Splat! You'll never know.

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Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

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Why did the man smell like french toast? His wife previously made him a plate of it that he ate before walking out of the house.

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What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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