Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

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How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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When my parents said that they chucked a flipper baby into the Atlantic ocean I assumed a baby seal, I later found out that happened to my disabled brother.

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I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

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A kid walks into a bar. The bartender promptly calls child protective services and the child is placed in a caring foster home.

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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Dwight Howard

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What is red and tastes like parsley? Red Parsley

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chuck norris is a little b|tch

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-Doctor! Scientists in California have enough proofs to demonstrate that the Christian religion is false. -Oh my God!

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Wright flyer

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A group of teenage boys put a flaming bag of dog feces on Old Man Howard's doorstep. He came out and demanded that they stop such behavior at once. They did, and the day went on normally.

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Y R U A B? I don't know why I am a bee.

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Your mom was so fat, She was overweight.

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If pinocchio said "my nose is going to grow", what would happen?

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Why was the mexican dead? Because he overdosed on Methamphetamine.

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Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

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Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

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Whats the best way to tell if your wife has been cheating on you with the UPS guy? simply ask her, trust and communication in relationships are vital in their survival and growth.

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A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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