A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being chased by other cannibal chickens.

Contrary to the popular saying, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away," if you get cancer there's nothing an apple can do...

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your balls chewed off by a rottweiler.

AHLTFKCITAWKSHTC

A baby seal walks into a club. :|

Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory? She made skittles.

A man walks into a bar and orders two shots the bartender then picks up his shotgun and gives it to him

Why was the woman arrested for trying to have sex with a miner? Because he was on the job and her advances were completely unwanted.

What did the penguin say to the peacock? Die, you homosexual!

Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

Your mom is not fat!

A baby seal walks into a club.

Why is OK SUK WHANG's name on a gravestone? She thought she was way better than okay.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

why was the clown sad? died of cancer and left his loving family to fend for themselves in this cruel, cruel world.

How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

What's the difference between The Holocaust and baking pizza? Pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

I haven't made a school shooting joke yet, but the day is young Just like those kids that got shot

Why did the man rob a convenience store? Don't ask why, call the police! He could be robbing more stores!

obama's promises

Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

Why did Chuck Norris go to Chuck E Cheeses? Because his friend wanted to go.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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