i went through your mum like a plane on 9,11

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a man walks into a bar. ouch.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

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Roses are wilting violets are wilting YOU HAD ONE JOB

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Why did Susan fall out a tree? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan

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A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment were left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

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Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

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8=D

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That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

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What does the name Joe mean? Joe Mama! Egit

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Did you hear about the cannibal who had a wife and ate kids?

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No soup for you!

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How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

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Q:how many ping-pong balls do you need te get a crocodile off of a slide ? A:none, because an engine doesn't have doors

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A black man goes to his dentist appointment and the doctor asks, have you brushed your teeth today laderius? the black man replies: Yes, but my name is not laderius

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Two astronauts go kayaking in the Sahara Desert. How many pancakes does it take to shingle doghouse? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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A duck walks by to a lemonade stand. He says to the man running the stand, "Quack."

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What does the hulk do when he's angry? Compulsively masturbate.

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Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

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Cole and his brother josh tag team jaycie until she cries herself to sleep while Sarah watches

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chuck norris

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How may Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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