when life throws you lemons your an idiot because it wont

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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Why don't vampires like garlic? Every vampires was raped by a garlic salesman.

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What did Santa do on Christmas? NOTHING HES NOT REAL!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This is a Poem, your Adopted

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I know 7 facts about you: 1. You're reading this. 2. You hate this overused shit. 3. You may think I will skip a number. 5. And you hate me much more. 6. You have seen porn. 7. You want me to kill myself. I am just gonna go suicide.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one underneath it. What's worse than that? It has to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It goes back for seconds.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

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wheres a good place to find funny jokes? anti-joke.com

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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What does Paris Hilton eat on Tuesdays? Nothing.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

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Why did i drink 4 sodas? Because i was thirsty

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Jews who wear penny loafers...

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Q:What did the wall say to the other wall? A: .

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Why did Sally cross the road? Because she fell off a tree. Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally wanted to cross the road.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Wrong house. I apologize.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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why did the disabled man go to the shops? because he wanted a radiator panel

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An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

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Where did the boy go after the explosion? Everywhere

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What do you call burt and ernie if they were black?? A couple of n*ggers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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