roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

Q-What did the hobo get for Christmas? A-Pneumonia.

What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He lost his punch line. -by Ross

A horse walks into a bar, but is kicked out because animals are not allowed in that bar.

What is the Pope's favourite dish to order from the local Indian take-away? Korma.

A blind man accidentally walks into a gay bar. The bartender escorted him out and pointed him in the right direction.

Did you hear about the cannibal who ate the Olympic record sprinter? He's in prison for first-degree murder & crimes against humanity.

Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

Jack Stevens

How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run, 'cause she's got a grenade in her mouth!

Women's rights...

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was cooked with eleven herbs and spices.

Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

What did the psycho killer order for dessert? Ice Cream.

How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

Pencils are yellow, Grass is green OK

This winter: "The seal is broken, as the spirits of hell go across the world, I can help you find them Clint! But only you can prevent them from killing your family!" "I will do whatever I must!" "Be careful, you can only see them with medication sample X, and destroy them with the super addictive Meladocs 5" "HOW DO I KILL THEM! I CANNOT HANDLE MORE MELADOCS 5! ITS ADDICTIVE AS HELL!" "Only you can save us Clint, only you can do this until their world malfunctions saving us all, but killing you in the process!" "I WILL... I CAN!... UGH... HOW MUCH LONGEEEEEEEEEEEEER!" THE PACKMAN: THE MOVIE.

Knock knock Who's there Orange Orange who Orange

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was uneducated and was not aware of the dangers of streets in heavily populated cities.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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