A man walks into a bar. "Excuse me sir," he asks, "may I have a beer?" "No," says the bartender.

What's worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. What's worse than a pile of dead babies? One baby is alive in the middle. What's worse than that? He is eating his way out...

I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: He died on Christmas Day, before his parents could tell him they had maxed out their credit cards to take him to Disney World. His father has since relapsed into alcoholism. He knows his wife is cheating on him with another man, but understands that she needs comfort that he cannot give her.

knock knock who`s there me oh come in

I have three heads and nine eyes, what am I? I'm a liar.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

Q:Why Did the Black people die in there car A: They were Homeless

Why was the frog sad? Because he had a boy's face stapled to his feet.

What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

In Soviet Russia, test takes you... to a privileged University with an appropriate transcript.

What did the deaf boy get for Christmas? Something like udgtationdaidnmgf

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one is quite sure because technology is not advanced enough for humans to converse with chickens.

i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

What happens when you click a link on a web page offering sex? You get a virus.

how did the girl with a hook-hand do her hair? She didn't

A: knock knock B: who's there A:come in B:come in who?

Roses are red, viotels are blue. God made me pretty, what happened to you?

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other one's a watermelon

What do you call a bunch of black people in a red car.... A jaffa

A black man, hispanic man, and white man walk in to a bar. They are all friends. They enjoy a few beers together then call a taxi to take them home because it is irresponsible to operate a motor vehicle while under the influence of alcohol or other drugs.

Man: You know what sucks? Other man: What? Man: Diarrhea... Know what's worse? Other man: No, what? Man: The smell.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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