Knock-Knock "Who's there?" "It's the police. We have a search warrant."

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist!

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What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

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Vagina-Boob

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Why was the asian guy's eyes slanted? Your question is a very valid one that most people often wonder, but never really ask. It's called an epicanthal fold...please, NOT "slanted eyes". Many people consider this to be a derogatory description of the descendents or those of Eastern Asia (as do I, being half Korean), but most people are unaware of this and say it anyway. I'll assume you didn't know this. :) The epicanthal fold (what we have) is something that all babies are born with, but those who may not be of Eastern Asian origin will eventually lose. The purpose of this "fold" is to protect the eyes from extreme sunlight and cold weather. Most people of the this part of Asia originated in Mongolia where the weather conditions were very cold and harsh. Also, with most of this population, you'll notice that there exists some extra padding below the eyes as well. With all that white snow and the sunlight reflecting off of it, don't you think with time our bodies would develop some sort of defense for one of our most valued senses--our sight? It makes sense, doesn't it? Also, notice, that the farther south you travel in Eastern Asia the "rounder" the eye gets (their is less evidence of the epicanthal fold), since the climate gets warmer the farther south you go. Evolution, baby. So, Eastern Asian eyes are NOT really slanted. They just appear to be. Instead they just have that extra fold above the eyes that make them appear "thinner", if you will. If you want to sound halfway intelligent, please don't use the description "slanted eyes" anymore, since this will only make you seem like somewhat of a bigot (racist). (You might say it around the wrong person one day.) Sorry, but I'm just trying to give you some good advice. I hope I helped.

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So Helen Keller walked into a bar... and then a chair.... and then a table..

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What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

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Roses are dead. Violets are dead. I'm a bad gardener.

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Q: What's worse than finding 1 worm in your apple? A: Finding 2 worms in your apple Q: What's worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? A: The Holocaust Q: What's worse than the Holocaust? A: Finding 3 worms in your apple!

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Miškinis gerai prikolina.

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What was the pirate movie rated? Pg-13

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Why are there clocks on stoves? Because it is a convenient way to tell the time.

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Question: What did Mr. Reeves say. Answer: Nothing

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A black man is a human, with feelings, living cells and a loving and devoted family, while a park bench is made from wood and metal and used purely for people to sit on. In parks.

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Why did the blind boy cross the road? Why? The world may never know. He was hit by a bus

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was being deporting because he over stayed his visa and is now an illegal immigrant

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What's funnier then a dead baby. Two dead babies.

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Did you know there is a whole country occupied with twins? It's called China

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Knock Knock Not Yet

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my friend is gay hes gay

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i punched my mother in the face once she cried

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PENIS

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A kid walks into a bar. The bartender promptly calls child protective services and the child is placed in a caring foster home.

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Why did the fat kid rob a pizza shop? Because he happened to like pizza.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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