What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a shark in your apple.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Get out of the bathroom Get out of the bathroom who? No, your in the bathroom

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Who keeps knocking on the wall? My neighbors have sex a lot.

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does your face hurt? yeah, neither does mine.

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A muslim walks into a airport. He then boards his flight and is flown to his destination.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

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whats blue and can be seen in the sky? the sky.

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Q: What did the psychopath dream about? A: An insane chimpanzee kicking his head off, or maybe something normal

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What do you call a really bad band? One with a poor guitar player, a bad bass player, sloppy drums, obnoxious vocals, and all of the songs sound the same. Or Nickelback.

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What black and white and red all over? A panther I was lying about the red and white.

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What did the coach do to the player Coached the player

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Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

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Pee Pee bleekkka klup look? fupapapapapapapapap

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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Your momma is so fat that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook her breasts for clocks

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roses are red violets are blue no one likes raisen bran except your mom

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Why did the tree get mad at the bush? It didn't. Bushes are inanimate objects, and so are trees.

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The blondes on the opposite part of the lake is a pretty good joke

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What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

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Chuck Norris doesn't wait in traffic, he takes the subway

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jelly is a clear or translucent fruit spread made from sweetened fruit juice, and set using naturally occurring pectin. Jam contains both fruit juice and pieces of fruit.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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Q: Whats worse than a dead baby in a bag? A: Please just make my hamburger.

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What do you call a 2 storied house ?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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