Were did Suzie go after the bombing? A: everywere

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What do you call a black Santa Claus A N i g g e r that doesn't exist

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

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Why are anti-jokes so funny?

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What do you do if your batteries die and you have none left? Go to your nearest battery selling retail store and buy some more.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police, your entire family died in a car accident. ... ... The police, your entire family died in a car accident who?

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What did Anne Frank say to the Nazis who found her? Please be gentle.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids from jumping the fence into your property? Molest them.

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what is the difference between a puppy and a baby... ...they are different animals

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Chuck Norris does not get sick; He only gets sick when his immune system is weak.

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waiter: can I get you something to drink? customer: I'll have a coke. waiter: is pepsi okay? customer: is monopoly money okay?

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So there's a man named Moses. He prays to God for a donkey to transport him from Bethlahem to Jerusalem. God granted his wish. God said" To make the donkey go, you must say Hallelujah. To make it stop you say Go". Moses rode off happily. Suddenly the donkey went off trail and was headed towards a steep cliff. Moses kept saying stop, stop, stop. He remembered what God had said, and had said Go. They stopped one inch before falling down. Moses thanked the lord and said " Thank You Jesus, Hallelujah." And down they went.

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So my girlfriend says I'm a pedophile. What does she know she's nine.

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Where do black people get there hair cut? At a hairdresser.

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A traveler gets a flat tire on an old farm road. He goes to the door of the neasrest farm and knocks. The farmer and his beautiful 21 year old daughter answer the door. Traveler: "I'm sorry, but I have a flat. Is there any place I can stay until I get it repaired?" Farmer: "Why yes. Our church sponsors a homeless shelter and rehab center down the road.I can give you a ride there if you like?"

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

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Some of these jokes are funny, others are sad.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes...? No, you're still Patrick!

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Where did Martha go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Roses are white, Violets are white, holy shit i can see the light.

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What did the orphan say to the other orphan? Annie is my favorite movie.

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Why did the duck eat the fish? It needed protein.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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