What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

how do you get a chicken to sleep you slit it"s neck,and feed the body to your pet tiger

A man walks into a store, and says to the cashier: "I'd like to buy 6 fridges". The cashier says: "Why do you need that many fridges?" The man says: "I'm an antelope!"

Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? The two ships suffered major damageand sank, killing over 100 people. The families of the passengers mourned their loss.

Sam: Knock knock? You: Who's there? Sam: Sammy Sosa. You: Hi, Sammy Sosa. Sam: Hi.

Your mother is so old that her prom theme was fire

Christanity One Womans Excuse of Not Having an Affair Got Totaly Out of Hand

What do you call a fat cat? Nothing if you are a good person

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal

One day I was walking in the forest when I saw a squirrel get hit by a van. It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

- How breakdance was invented? - A certain black man was trying to stole rims from moving car.

How can you tell a blonde a brunette and a red head apart? Ask them if that is their natural hair color.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

Your dad is so gay, he does not have a girlfriend.

(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

Why did a black kid kill his teacher? No reason. That what they do

Why did the skeleton cross the road? Because Apocalypse arrived and dead people now have the ability to walk.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to

What do you call a black drug dealer? A black man that works as a drug dealer

What name does Steve Bartman go by Now? Steve Bartman, but he just hides all day trying not to be killed.

I was thinking... Love conquers all right? Remember the epic crying video? Satan: Because... Some where deep inside... I still love you... God:BUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHAAAAUuuuaaaahhh... (Partially invisible effect hand of Satan pats God on the back) The universe is at peace with no opposing forces and I am Nerometal, not that asshole that claims to have one fist and is the leader of some sect, I am and will always be the original Moralman, my name simply happens to be Nero, and thats it, so I am not dissing the bible, why would I none of my business literally, but if love can be tha powerful eh?

knock knock whos there steve i dont know you go away

What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

What's black, white, and red all over? An ovulating mulatto woman.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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