why did the doctor go to jail? he was found guilty of the murder and rape of a 6 year old boy.

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Humpty dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty dumpty had a big fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men did not come to help him because the United States does not have a patriarchal system of government.

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what does a beer and a priest have in common? They both are cold refreshing beverages, except for the priest.

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Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

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What do humans and fish both have in common? They both live underwater, apart from humans.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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why was the boy crying he had cancer

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

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You know you have no friends when you write anti-jokes. [M]

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why was the old woman angry? fig pudding.

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What do you call a black and white ruler? Barack Obama.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch a pail of water Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill called the paramedics

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Why was the woman terrified of being screened by the TSA? Because she's embarrassingly obese, liked most Americans.

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What did Frankenstein say to Dracula? Hey, that's a nice cape.

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why did the child go to school? Because he wants to succeed in life

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Joseph Kony. Give me your children.

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What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was high.

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what is long black and smelly the welfare line

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Why are people attacking the Jews we gave you so much things like: Television (Thomas Edison) Electricity (Thomas Edison) Weapons (Arvin Humbergs) Wifi (Edcolsin Vinstein) Be gr8 ful without us your nothing

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have woman's rights Knock knock Who's there? NOT Sally, she's in the kitchen

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Why does the cow eat grass? A: Because it's green. (Cows are colorblind)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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