What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Roses are red. Violets are blue. and Asians are yellow.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What kind of gun cant shoot bullets Hand guns

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A black man, a Muslim man, and a Jewish man walk into a bar so the bartender says, "Get the f*** out."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +226

What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

thumb_up thumb_down -28

ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man came up to me and said," you suck" You know what I told him "YOU SUCK!"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the man say when he saw an orange? That's not a banana.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is worst than a1000 baby's stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why couldn't the black guy support his family? He was only 3 years old.

thumb_up thumb_down

What does a turkey do? I don't know I'm not a turkey

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What's the best thing about twenty six year olds? There are 20 of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

every man comes from between a women's legs for the rest of their lives they try to get back in

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the great political leader say in order to calm the riot. There were no definable words. He merely screamed as the riot swallowed him and tore him apart.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What'd the black woman say when she met her husband's white mistress? Hello, nice to meet you.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's worse than doing the dishes with long sleeves? Finding out your girlfriend's been cheating on you.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the boy die? He had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q. Why did the fat boy cross the road? A. To go on a diet

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops