Why was there a lion in the bathroom? Because I threw a refrigerator at it and stapled a frog to its butthole, all while it was being chased by a 10 foot scorpion and a purple salmon that only had 1 eye.

8====D {(0)}

You wanna hear a joke about my penis Nevermind, it would be inappropriate of me to say such a thing.

ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

Q: A vandal walked into a bar. What did the bartender say? A: Nothing, the vandal had covered him and the bar in pritt stick before he had the opportunity to speak, then left with his penguin accomplice, Reginald the third.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

What is black and blue? A pen with reversable ink.

roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

What did Little Jojo get for Hanukah? Nothing he is Muslim.

knock knock? who's there.......... MEEEE :D hehe

An epileptic man attends a rave.

What did the school bully get for his birthday? Beaten by his alcoholic father. Children are a product of their environment and his father's abusive nature towards his son forced the young boy to act out in class giving him the reputation of a bully.

Knock knock whose there nobody you have no friends remember

Why did the horse fall over? Because I shot it

Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

What is the difference between an Irishman and a plank of wood? Almost everything, including anatomy, chemical make up, mass etc

Q. How do you get a dinosaur off a slide? A. You tell him he hasn't lived for billions of years.

Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

Want to hear an anti-joke?

So a female ant walks into a bar... and someone steps on it.

What did one hostage say to the other hostage? Hrmfhrmfphmfr

SUCK MY 29 AND A HALF FOOT LONG DICK BITCH JUST KIDDING............ IT IS 69 FEET LONG GIGADY

He who laughs last gathers no moss.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...