How many sumo wrestlers does it take to lift a huge rock? The point of lifting a rock just to lift a rock is stupid, so why would you get 3 sumo wrestlers to come out and waste their time.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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So Helen Keller walks into a bar...

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Q: Why is the Universe so big? A: Because it is the same size as my penis.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? She had no arms

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you accent is really not hiding it

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Bob: Hey Jim, what's up? Jim: Obviously the sky, oh and i see a few planes too. by the way why are you asking me why don't you just look up?

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Two blondes walk into a building......you'd think at least one of them would have seen it.

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Who can make 50 iPads in 1 hour? An Asian

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What has three legs and bleeds? A cat with a cut off leg.

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what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? a jew is a member of a religion called Judaism, they're generally tall and have curly hair, however not in all situations is this true. They celebrate Chanukah and passover and many other holidays. Pizza is an italian dish, it's round, has red sauce and cheese on it and is pretty tasty.

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What moos like a cow? Another cow

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Todd is offered a pizza, chinese food, and a sandwich. he then kills himself because options trigger a psychological disorder that was diagnosed to him as a child

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Why to lawyers wear neckties? It's part of the uniform.

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What did the nerd say to the bully? Nothing. The bully killed him before he could say anything.

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What's worse than cancer? Nothing.

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Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

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Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

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Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

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Why did the kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy mushroom soup in my testicles belly Buton cheese.com ( tickle my. Nipple frog)

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

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The term "serial killer" is a bit strong...i prefer "ghost manufacturer"

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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