Why did the man stop smoking? Because he was shot in the face.

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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One man's trash is another man's treasure is a horrible way to tell a kid that he's adopted

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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My zombie busting team: Tank: The Terminator Mechanic: Tony Stark Demolitions: Superman Medic: Gandalf Bait: Justin Bieber

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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what type of cat has green feathers? a green-feathered cat.

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wanna here a dirty joke? Suree A white horse fell in a mud puddle dum dumdum dum duuuuuuummmm

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What do you call a drunk irishman? A cab.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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I like trees. Trees hate you. Bye.

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why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

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A guy walks into a bar and says 'Ow!'

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Lethal injection is a lot more humane than the electric chair. I know because nobody's complained about it yet.

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What's white, wet, and salty? Salt that has come in contact with a liquid in the recent past, seeing as the liquid has not evaporated completely from the combination of sodium and chloride yet.

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You know what I hate long anti-jokes that take up too much space.

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Got no dick? Then you're probably a girl.

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what happened to the man who fell off the boat? He died!

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why the second koala fall out of the tree? because it was hit by the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? because it thought it was a game.

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Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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How do you leave a gay guy in suspense? How? ......................

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A pirate walks out of a bar. He drowns in a puddle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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