What is worse than a bunch of babies stapled to a tree? A bunch of trees stapled to a baby.

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A woman walked into a bar at least that is what she tells her friends about how she got a blackeye.

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What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

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What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

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W.N.B.A.

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The anti joke that repeats itself :(

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Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer. And a free haircut.

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q: whats fat hairy and always eats mcdonalds a playboy model i lied about everything

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Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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yo mamma so fat she seen a yellow train full of white people and she said stop that twinkie

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Yo mamma so black, she uses armor all instead of lotion...

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What is green and has wheels???? Yo mamma on a Wednesday.

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KEVIN CRUMMY SMELLS LIKE SARAHS (I)

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What do you get when you cross a blonde with Nickelodon? You get Dora because she is allways telling you what to do.

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What did Roadrunner name his car? Turbo Tax.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

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Show me the money! Said the man last wednesday.

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Why did Chad find dead people all over the playground? Ask him, it's not like he's pointing a gun at your face.

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How do you prevent a baby from crawling all over the place? You nail his hands to the floor

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An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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