Father: Son stop masterbating u might go blind Son: But Dad I'm over here

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

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Why didnt john feel like fis n chips? he had a bus stuck up his ars

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retard

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

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1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

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Why did the milk man cry? Cause you killed his family.

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Q:Where does a woman work at if she has 1 leg? A: IHOP!!! :)

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You remind me of something. What? Summer Why because I'm hot? no because there is no class..

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Q : Why was the little girl crying? A : Because she tripped and hurt her knee.

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why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

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A man walks into a bar, furious that his son had been knocked down by a car and was now in hospital with a fractured leg and concussion. Another man, who sits on a stool at the end of the bar, is playing with his drink and wondering if his wife had made a chicken curry, since she said she would for tonight's dinner.

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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Whats worse than getting a B+ in Biology? Getting raped by a scorpion.

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Oh you're dating my ex? Do you want my unfinished sandwhich too? And my old shoes? And a couple of my shirts I don't wear anymore? How about a my toys I used to play with? Or my spoiled pickle that's been in my car for about a year and a half after I went to the mall with my friends, we watched a movie, I don't remember which one it was but it was funny, then after that we went to McDonald's and it was the first time I heard of McGangbang and it was pretty good. After that I think we went to Jerry's cousin's house, he was a cool guy until I found out that he likes Tyga, so I ended up never talking to him again.... I went off topic, sorry

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Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

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Hey, you wanna hear a joke? The holocaust.

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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Irish sobriety

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What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Be sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

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How come anti jokes r funny

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What's grey and looks good on policemen? your mom.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Why did the Jew go to prison. He slaughtered his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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