What do you call ugly? Dionne Dodds

united we sit, cause we're fat

Why did the girl lie to the priest? because she didn't want to tell him the truth

If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

Two Iranian men walk into a bar and order a Coke and a Lemonade. The Barman said take a seat and he'll bring them over.

Why didn't the man fall off his bicycle? Because He wasn't riding a bicycle!

Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

what do snozberries taste like? Lama

A seal walks into a club, It proceeds to maul customers and then makes its way back to the ocean where it lives.

Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

i was in bed with a girl recently and she said to me 'I want tonight to be magical', so afterwards i disappeared.

shut up iggy

A man walks into a bar. Several hours later he staggers out and drives into an oncoming school bus, killing all occupants. He survives to live with the grief for the rest of his life and attempts to commit suicide several times.

A: Hey ask me if Im a fire truck? B: Are you a Fire Truck? A: No why would you ask that?

What's funnier than throwing a baby off a bridge? Everything, if you think that's funny, you're a terrible person.

A blind man walks into a book store. He asks if they have any books in Braille. The employee says "Yes! Many you haven't even seen before!"

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

What's bigger then a bowling ball? What? Your mom!

I was going to write about anti-climaxes but then I didn't.

Q. What did the boy do for his birthday? A. Nothing. His birthday occurred on 9-11.

How is the difference between a door? Its a chicken, because they don't have wheels.

What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

How do you kill a Jew? Shoot him in the head.

A man looks in his toilet and gazes in fear of the fact that there is blood on his bowel movement. He has colitis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...