why did the Chinese guy take steroids? He didn't he's naturally small.

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Did you hear that Jerry Sandusky won the swimming race? He's in very good shape for a man his age.

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A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

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Who's this Jesus, have you heard of him?

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? 10. 3 in back, 2 up front and the rest in the ash tray.

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What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? DAM!

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Why did the Asian man open up a Sushi restaurant? Because he had a fetish for cumming in sushi and giving it to strangers.

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A white man is found dead in an alley way, who was the murderer? The black guy trying to climb up the walls to escape.

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What's small, pale blue and sits at the bottom of the pool? "An over ripe blueberry."

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What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas. A new vest and a puppy because his father got a promotion and a much higher pay raise.

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A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

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Why did silly Miss Sally put her baby in the dishwasher? Because she was suffering from advanced stages of Schizophrenia. She thought that her baby was a dish. Her mother, Carol watched in horror as her granddaughter was placed inside. A tear dribbled from her eye. Things had been bad, but because Sally was her daughter, she had been tolerant. Carol sobbed as the baby screamed in terror, unable to escape. Finally, Carol, tears in her eyes, called Child Protective Services on her own daughter, something she didn't want to do. When CPS representatives finally came, they were horrified at the sight of a screaming baby covered in suds with burnt skin that had been scorched by hot jets. Sally's baby, Alex was taken from her and put into foster care.

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What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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whats white and gooy liguid goop

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Ryan

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what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

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How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

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Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

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Q: If 0+0=2 and four shampoo bottles is equal to two toaster strudels, how many pizza slices can Samuel eat? A: Winter because grass=6

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its neck.

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Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

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why was the toddler sad? he was diagnosed with cancer after his dog was put down because it raped and murdered his parents

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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