A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital due to a large aneurysm that has burst in his brain because he walked into the bar.

How do you get Doctor Phil in a bikini? Give him a little alcohol to ease inhibitions and offer him a suitable bribe.

You know what they say about a man with big feet! They say it's indicative of the size of his penis, although there's no scientific evidence backing this up.

What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

Whats brown and a fag? A bundle of sticks

Excuses are like butt holes...they are round

216-409-7176 Call me.

why did sally fall of the swing? because she had no arms... knock knock? (whos there) not sally

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have AIDS.

why hppened when the little boy failed his math test? He cut off his penis, shaved his head and hung himself

Why isnt Gemma a Surfboarder? .. Because She was a Stillborn. Why isn't Kate a Ballerina? Because She's paralysed. Why isnt Tommy an Olympic High Jumper? Because He's a dwarf.

What's worse than losing your wallet? Having a miscarriage.

Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

Why did Hitler kill himself? He saw his gas bill.

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

What did the friend say to the other friend? A. Hi friend.

Why did the man run? Because he was trying to get a gold medal for the 200m at the Olympics.

A Jewish man walks into a grocery store. He purchases the items he needs and leaves.

Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

why doesn't the werewolf like Ferrari's a werewolf being a mythical creature would most likely not have a preference as to what kind of car he drives because he would not exist

Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...