How do you make a Bong Ki mad? Call him a Bong Ki.

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I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night. The handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket.

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A woman walks into a bar and asks for a duck. The bartender is confused, assumes the women has some sort of mental problem, and treats her nicely, as his sister suffers from Down's Syndrome.

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What do you call a feminist that believes that all women have just as many rights as men? Stupid.

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#So tell me what you want, what you really really want, so tell me what you want, what you really really want.# OhOk then. I'll take that photo of your mother.

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Why couldn't the boy watch the R-rated movie? Cuz he was blind.

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A duck walks into a bar, but he is kicked out because he is not 21

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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Whats great about F***ing twenty one year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

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What's black and white and red all over? A panda with red paint splattered on it

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Roses are red Violets are victorious 2 in a chamber Mr pistorius

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

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Why was the black man running away from the cops? He was running a relay race.

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Why are girls large and round? Because they are raised by wild packs of oompa loompas.

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What do a blonde and a good beer have in common? They both go down easy.

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Why did the older man begin to walk faster after a black man started walking towards him? He was late for work.

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Q. What did the toothbrush say to the toothpaste A. Nothing you idiot there inanimate objects they can't talk

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I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

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What's sad about a truck passing behind a duck? A: Behind the Duck were the Ducklings.

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Rebecca Black's career.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

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Why was Sally crying? Because she had a frog stapled to her face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops