A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Sorry not thinking here, of course I will arrive sooner, give me 20 minutes or so (got to scout the area, you never know) As for coding, there is no hidden meaning so yeah... That is probably some "Neronist" coding format I never knew of I am using so well. Cant drive like this, so I will use a cab and wait for you at the back seat or something, I will let the Taxi cab honk the numbers of code here so you can come out knowing its safe. I sincerely thought you where at the home, according to our coordinates you are... Dont tell me that bastard built some basement over there, wow! I really miss him now, if nothing else because I would have liked a wine cellar made in less than... Sorry, ill be there asap, 20 minutes or less, nah, believe me, "fancy" is the least of things I want, and I wont be changing my mind anytime soon. See ya. I am sincerely surprised you even remember me, then again I look a lot like your crush. Abel (in case you where wondering, this is not my name either, but you get the picture by now)

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was it so easy for Superman to pick up chics? His butt ox.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Roses are red. Violets are blue. You honstly thought i would cry over you? Well guess what player, You just got played too!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was the girl sad? Because she was, you idiot!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

This is my joke. funny

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the cancer patient say after the little boy told him a funny joke? I'm dying

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What has 4 legs and doesn't move? A child born in Chernobyl.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Once upon a time a was born

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

like if u think princess kenny id the fairest maiden in all the land. if u havent played or watched pewdiepie play south park the stick of truth, disregard this message.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

where did the black person go poop ? in the toilet!

thumb_up thumb_down +38

More mindfuck: Your school is betraying you edition. How are you going to feel good about yourself, if you have to UNDER STAND everything you learn? Moral: If you dont get it, you are not ready.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

There once was a man from Nantucket, He sailed a boat.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: What do you say to someone who makes fun of you and is bigger than you? A: Nothing, you just punch him in the toe and run away

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What happened to the cat How should I know it's not my cat

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

who smells? •Liam

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why didnt the chicken cross the road? -Its a chicken you dumb shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A joke

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between a cheeseburger and a dead baby............I don't j!zz on the cheeseburger before I eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops