Q: what do strawberry and a cat have in common? A: they are both red except for the cat

A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

What's more dangerous than bungee jumping without a rope? Getting into a car with Ben Colbert.

On a scale of 1 to Lord Voldemort, how awkward would you say your hugs are?

how do you kill a little girl? seeing as murder is a federal offence i will not tell you how. you should be ashamed for asking.

What's black and looks like Burnt Popcorn? A black man

What did the pickle say to the cucumber? I am you from the future!

why was the black woman forced to sit in the back of the bus? all the other seats were taken.

(Guy)That's what she said. (His Girlfriend) And who is this she.

What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He died.

Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

^that joke's not funny

You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

How do you make a black person mad? Set his house on fire.

What did the young girl with leukemia say to a stranger? I am afraid

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I am an orphan I have no parents

What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What does a Barbie Doll and Britney Spears have in common? They're both 100 percent plastic.

What did the blonde say to the brunette? We both have hair

Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? Dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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