Two swallows migrate to Africa. One swallows initiates the conversation, that's when the other catch fire.

your mama is so stupid i believe she will have a difficult time finding employment in these rough economic times

How many dead babies can fit in a barrel? 4 1/2

Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

What's green and invisible? This cabbage

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

Roses are red vielots are blue but they aren't as sweet as you.Can you be my Valentine ny choclate cupcake will you me my choclate

what do u call a long dik gay guy Gay Dickerson

What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

What's the difference between a duck? both of it's legs are the same.

What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

"Aids" "What?" "Yup, you just got aids­­­."

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

Whats the difference between babies and a dart board? Dart boards dont bleed

how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

trump and hillary are both stranded on an island, who survives? america

A cat ran into the road...I hit it

What's white and horny? a unicorn.

Why did the car drink Slurpies? I don't know. Why? Doorknob. Carl was unsure on what his friend, Frank meant when he told his joke, but then again who IS sure? Frank is the only one who truly knows what happened that day on August 13th 2010 when his mother came over for a surprise visit to her son's house just as Frank was heading out the door about to get in his truck and buy groceries, unaware that his mother was standing outside and bending over to ring the door bell not to expect Frank opening the door with his quick and violent actions thus hitting his mother in the face as the door swung open. Frank hadn't known his mother was at his house nor even remembered him but there she was, past out bleeding to death on his front lawn. It was Frank's fault that day, when his mother past away and reason why Frank hides his anger through his jokes. If only he hadn't opened that door he tells himself every night. Now he's cursed himself with his odd humour of using doorknobs as punchlines to hide his grief of his loss. And with that, Carl replies; Ummm.... I don't get it.

if your in a wheelchair have no hair because of cancer and are being fed through a tube you should wait a couple of years before ending it. and wrinkles into the equation....... BANG

What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

so there are 3 people who have heard of this magical cliff; theyre names are harry, dick, and joe. how the cliff works is that when you jump off you turn into whatever you say as you jump. first harry jumps off and yells plane, he turns into a plane and flys off. next dick jumps off and yells bird he turns into a bird and flys off. finally joe steps up to the cliff as he was walking he trips and falls as hes falling he yells HARRY DICK he than hits the ground and dies. everyone mourned for such a well respected individual.

Whats worse than being raped? Being raped and murdered.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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