what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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Roses are red Cranberries are tart It sure stinks when you fart

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

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What did the tiger say to the jellyfish? Nothing; tigers can't talk. And if they could the chances of a tiger meeting a jellyfish would be very slim.

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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What flys? A fly

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your mother is so fat that she got brain damaged from cardiac arrest and now needs medical care for the rest of her life.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first moneky.. Why did the 3rd monkey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game.. Why did the 4th monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure..

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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

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What does Obama and Darth Vader Have in Common? Nothing. Darth Vader is not a real person and thus cannot be compared to the president of the UNited States.

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Two guys are walking on a bridge. One has long hair. The other does not care.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

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What's long and black? A black hockey stick.

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roses are red violets are blue What smells like poo? Your waffle's blue

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How do you make a girl happy then sad within 5 seconds? Buy her a pony and then shoot it

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What did the 10 year old luekemia patient get for christmas? Dead parents

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What did one skeleton say to the other? Nothing... Skeletons don't have vocal cords

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What do you do with a Jewish kid with add( attention deficits disorder)? Send him to a concentration camp

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barack osama

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What do you call a black man in space? A space monkey.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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I used to know what alzheimers was

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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