How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her in the head.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

A man walks into a bar and pulls out a tiny piano and a 12 inch pianist, which is really just his member with a smiley face drawn on it. Somebody calls the police muttering, "What is this world coming to?"

What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

You know what's worse than having friends with a lake houses Not being invited to their lake house...

A man walks into a bar and orders a shot. The bartender asks to see his I.D. The man explains that he had lost his I.D. earlier in the day. The bartender then asked the man to leave, so he left.

There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

A panda walks into a bar, orders some bamboo shoots, and bamboo leaves, and eats them

like this joke for a free ipod nano or a dead baby ?

why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

Holy fuckfarts! I did mention I am at my mothers place right? What am I saying? What am I typing? Marry me now!

A blond, a brunette, and a red-head are standing on the edge of a cliff. They then realize how dangerous that is and proceed to back away and view the canyon at a safe distance.

Why did the mokey board the westbound train? I said gray umbrella noodle head!

What do the Jewish man, the Black man, and Mexican man all have in common? They all miraculously like cantalope.

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples, how many pancakes can hit the roof? ...Purple!! Because aliens don't wear hats.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Nothing really

what did the terorist do when he went out side blew up

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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