Q: What's worse than getting jury duty? A: Getting herpies from a rabbit

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how do you get a clown off a swing? hit him with an axe

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Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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why do i want to get raped because then its not rape

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My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

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Why didn't the Mother packed her son's lunch? Because her son Timmy likes to go to the canteen

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what did the frog say to the fence? chicken

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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"This is Jesus Christ to Tim Tebow. Please leave me alone. Don't you know that my day off, is Sunday?"

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If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

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How old is your mom Dead

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knock knock? whos there? eatmop. eatmopwho? HAHAHAH EAT MY POO

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color?

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Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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I said I read te terms of service. I didnt

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What's black and chrispy inside? A black guy with bonecancer

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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Why'd the first koala fall out of the tree? He died. Why'd the second koala fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first koala. Why'd the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game. Why'd the refrigerator fall out of the tree? He thought he was a koala. Why'd the boy fall off the swing? He was hit by 3 koalas and a refrigerator. Why'd the boy fall off his bike? He had no arms or legs

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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Penis.

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What did the dog do in the phone booth? Nothing, as dog do not have opposable thumbs and cannot grip objects. The previous user must have left the door open and the dog walked in, only to leave a few moments later.

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i have a six pack.... of crayons......... just kidding i ate two of them

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Kevin: Why can't you hear a pterodactyl urinate? Bob: Because it's extinct? Kevin: No you idiot! The P is silent! Pterodactyl: RAARRGHH! (eats Bob)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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