What did the the White blood cell say to the bacteria? Nothing. Its a cell. It goes through phagocytosis.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

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jess yawns with no hands in front of her mouth. true story.

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An albino and a jew walk in to a bar. They both order the same drink and chat for a few minutes before the albino must get home to his wife. The jew leaves shortly after, tipping the bar tender a generous amount for his superb service.

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why did Suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock? whos there not Suzie

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Why does a black person buy water? Because everyone needs water to survive SKH RZH

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Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

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Why does beyonce sing "to the left to the left?" cause women have no rights

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"Why did the chicken cross the road? ... To get to your house. Knock knock." "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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Its behind you like if you looked behind

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A man walks into a sofa. BANG

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick

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A bar walks into a man and the man walks into a watermelon then the watermelon walks into a black guy then the black guy walks into a piece of fried chicken then the piece of fried chicken walks into a hotdog then the hotdog walks into a wall then the wall walks into a horse then the horse walks into a jar of mayonaise then the jar of mayonaise walks into a can then the can walks into the bar

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how did little johnny die? i killed him

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Knock knock Whose there? Interrupting doctor Interr-- You have cancer.

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Why did the dog bark? Because he wanted to.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What is the difference between green and desert sage? About 20 bucks a gallon.

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Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

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What do you call a dead child? The product of a car crash

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Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar And doesn't

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was in my sandwich and i'm late for class.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic that choked on his own vimto?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a registered sex offender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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