A gorilla walks into the DMV to apply for a drivers license. Turns out it was just some guy in a gorilla suit doing a prank. Everybody instantly realized this at the time since gorillas aren't indigenous to the local area. They guy responsible was charged with a small fine for public mischief.

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

some kid told me pink dolphin clothiing was nigged, so i took an eraser , gave it to his sister and beat the poop out of hiis car ON A THURSDAY!!!!!!

And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

I jizzed in my pants. It tasted good

Your mother is so fat that when she went to get weighed she was diagnosed as clinically obese and later broke down into tears.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he was dead.

Who killed Lincoln Nobody knows

What do you call a KKK member? ...racist

what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

Why do blind people laugh at this joke? Because they can't read it and everyone else is laughing.

Have u ever noticed why a Police car siren isnt as loud as an ambulance siren? Do u know why that is? Because i dont, and i would like to know because my over active and curious brain is pounding through my skull and throbbing with question and wont stop until i know the answer!

What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to jump over your car, then drive by in a truck

Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Its very nice.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

What is big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? I don't know. I cant think f anything big and white that fall from trees that can kill you and besides if it is big enough to kill you then you will likely see it and avoid the section of that tree lest the big white object should fall and kill you because of this it is likely that anything that is big and white and falls from trees will in result kill you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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