What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers

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How do you drown a blonde. Put a Scratch N Sniff at the bottom of a pool and tell her to sniff it.

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what is funnier then this joke? A jewish muslim that is asian, balck, and mexican,and is woomen crossing the border then geting shot and hung by a rope of dead babies

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What did the bus say to the short bus? Heh, you're retarded..

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Knock knock. This is a no soliciting residence, and I do not open my door for strangers.

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The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

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Sometimes Jamie wishes he could be a different person. He wishes he didnt have to eat dick everynight but it was all to late. He had to take it down the throat but he enjoyed the tickle it gave him

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

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An Asian, a white man and a black man were running in a race. The Asian won and the black man came second due to his lack of training and motivation over the past couple of months.

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whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies and their grieving mothers standing over them. thats what.

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A captain crashes his boat into a rock. He has the option to save to save his wife or his best friend. He saves neither and drowns.

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Boy: Why'd the chicken cross the road Mom: I don't know go ask the chicken

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What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

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I love you

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

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What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it's a grape and therefore unable to speak.

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fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

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Why did Oliver fall? He shot himself.

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Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had celebral palsy.

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What's broken to the side of the road and covered in cookie crumbs? A girlscout that got hit by a car.

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What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

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What's worse than failing out of high school? Finding out your mom has cancer.

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What smells like peanut butter but looks like a penis? A penis, I lied about the peanut butter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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