What's black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

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What is big, white, and heavy ? A fridge

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What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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try slamming a revolving door

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whos there Not Susie What did Susie get for Christmas? I don't know , she never opened it. Who high fived Susie? No one Why did Susie die? She got shot in the face

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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What do you say to a homeless man sat in a train station? That there is a homeless shelter around the corner.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the fried chicken restaurant... BAWK BAWK cannibal

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Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

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Poop...

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Friends are like trees, They fall down if you hit them several times with an axe.

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Q: Whats worst then losing your wallet? A: Giving birth to a dead baby.

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what would be the most epic fight ever chuck norris vs superman vs all legendary pokemon vs a giant who would win it me (im superman)

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What did the old man say when those damn kids stepped on his lawn? Nothing one of those kids killed him around three years back....

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Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

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What do you call a deer with no legs? Legs in the City

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

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What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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