What do Abraham Lincoln and George Washington have in common? They both had beards, except for Washington.

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Why is 6 afriad of 7? because 7 killed 8 with a pistol and is now on a killing spree.

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poop

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get in the car.

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A man walked into a bar because he worked there.

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What do you call 200 black people dead in the ocean? It's a start.

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Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Beacuse it was dead.

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A man fuffers srom lysdexiea

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That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

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Knock,Knock Whos there ? Hola Holo who ? Holocaust Hahahaha

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Why did the clown have a heart attack? He had long term heart problems.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The entire population.

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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed? She got kicked in the face by a mule.

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Q: Why did the little boy drop his toy? A: He fell and broke his wrist, then dropped it in the emergency room, due to the broken wrist.

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A panda walks into a bar. He eats but then is tranquilized and taken back to the zoo.

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A hot girl walks by a boy and he stares at her as she walks past. She see's him and asks "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied "Oh I'm sorry. You happened to look familiar and I thought 'Perhaps I've met this person before. School? No. Work? No. I then concluded I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at".

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Q-What happened to the kid who thought he could fly A-his head exploded while he was sitting in a microwave

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I agree

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So there's this one Cheerio who really likes this frosted Cheerio. He walks up to her one day and asks her out. She responded, "no I only date frosted Cheerios." The Cheerio then went and got a tutor, he became very, very smart and turned into a multi-grain Cheerio. He goes up to the frosted Cheerio and asks her out. "no, you're still not a frosted Cheerio." he gets a gym membership and works really, really hard and becomes and apple cinnamon Cheerio. He asks her out again, "no you're still not a frosted Cheerio." so he goes to church too and becomes a honey nut Cheerio. "no you're still not a frosted Cheerio." he focuses and tries even harder than ever before and finally becomes a frosted Cheerio. He asks her out, "will you be my girlfriend? I heard about this party this weekend we can go to." she answers, "I'll be your girlfriend, let's go to that party." So, they go to this party. The boy asks. "do you want anything to drink?" the girl says "sure maybe some wine." the boy en goes to the wine store. There's a super long line and he waits and waits but goes back to the party. He tells her and asks her if she wants anything else. "some soda maybe." he goes to the soda shop and there's another long line and he waits until he can't take it and goes back again. He tells h and asks her if she wants anything else. "some punch please." He goes to the punch store, and there's no punch line.

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

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what did one white man say to the other white man? hello!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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