Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, we know you've been pirating movies.

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

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A man walks into the bar and asks the bartender, "Are you smelling me right now?"

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A man with no legs walks into a bar. Just kidding...

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A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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what?

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Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

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Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

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Why did Jack and Jill fall down the hill? Because they were donuts

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A bald guy walks out of a bar Prostate cancer

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-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

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The dewey decimal system

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How do you evolve a Pikachu into a Raichu? You use a Thunderstone.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

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Whats worse than an old guy? An old woman!

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

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So a Hispanic, African-American, Jewish, and Asian man were walking down the street. They were involved in a parade that celebrated racial equality.

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What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting brutally raped in the anus by the Dark Lord Satan.

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A horse shits himself SHITLESS!

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What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

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Skinny guy: Hey wanna hear a yo mama joke? Fat mother: Hey you wanna die?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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