How did Matt stop the robbers? He called the police.

why did the chicken cross the road cause he was suicidal but a car just didnt happen to hit him.

what did the therapist say to the other therapist? were both therapists.

Knock knock Who's there? It's me It's me who? It's me who is knocking the door

Whats worse then finding TWO worms in your apple? The Holocaust, it was pretty bad.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes Wtf?

Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

cerleb i wrote the one about melons!

Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

Why did rachels computer break ? Because she was using it in the road and got hit by a bus

an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

How did Suzy die She choked on a Pick-Up Truck

Your momma so fat she's fat

What rhymes with turtle? Rape

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

There are three muffins sitting in an oven. The first one says nothing. The second one also says nothing. They're just muffins and muffins can't talk.

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink. (Don't ask me how that's possible, just go with it) As the bartender is pouring it, he asks "Why the long face?" The horse responds "My son died of cancer this morning..."

What has hands but isn't alive? A dead person.

How did the rabbi die? It didnt it lived through the shooting

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

Why was the baby's face red? Because it was bloody.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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