whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food before? No? Well neither have they.

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

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Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

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Whats funnier then a dead baby? A lot of things.

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All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

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What do you call a man who does not burst into tears after hearing that his mother has died? A person that has been desensitized by today's cruel world and society.

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What do you call a black airman? A pilot!

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots? It depends on what his name is.

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My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

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Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

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your mama is so fat she wears big pants.

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Why was the boy eating lunch by himself at school? Because his only friend was hit by a train.

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Gay rights.

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A. Did you hear about the circus fires? b. They were intense. (in tents)

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I'm rick james bitch

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He who laughs last...is not a laughing owl because they're extinct.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin get in the Batmobile.

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Everyone is different, but there are two of me, therefore I am unique. I have 72 different personalities, which all think, act and behave the same, all have my same name, but its still different to have such a thing eh? No I am not asking, I just added that weird little lightbulb symbol after "eh". People buy my book, its full of this nonsense... Its named "Are you left winged, or wrong winged" The book that has nothing to do with politics, and everything to do with politicians non existent sexlife! (seriously I had a book signing today... It was weird, people like stood in line twenty Signatures... AND PEOPLE ARE ALL GOING "HEY ARE YOU THAT GUY FROM HORSEHEAD?" Nero -WHO THE FUCK! IS THAT GUY ON HORSEHEAD?

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knock! knock! whos there!?! abandoned baby!

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot

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What's comfy and easy to wear? Shorts.

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What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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