Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all fall on a small boy below, putting him into a 20-year coma.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many fools does it take to change a light bulb? A lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A father had three children Rose Daisy and Cinderblock. Rose comes up to her father and asks"daddy why am i named Rose?' the father answered"well when you were a baby a rose petal fell on your head"Rose Reply's "oh thats nice" and walk's away. the Daisy comes up and ask's "Daddy! why am i named Daisy!" the Dad answered "well. when you were a baby a rose petal fell on your head" Daisy Replied" oh ok i guess" and walked away. Then Cinderblock came up and asked "duuuhhhd" and the father simply replied" Shut up Cinderblock".

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the church say to the house? You need jesus

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

thumb_up thumb_down -24

the awkward moment when you have a boner on your boner

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the cow say to the horse? Mooo

thumb_up thumb_down +7

yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: What did the boy with no arms or lags get for christmas? A: He dosent now he cant open them.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's a golfer's favorite sandwich? Well, it depends on the golfer

thumb_up thumb_down +7

"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They were caucasian artists.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

A guy named M.C. walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "wheres the food?" The bartender says, " its in your stomach."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you kill a blonde? Drench her in fluoroantimonic acid and watch her explode in a violent and gruesome death.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

thumb_up thumb_down +4

your mommas so ugly it is affecting her self esteem!

thumb_up thumb_down +64

Q: What's gray and comes in gallons? A: Gray paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Hi, Steve!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A comedian walks onto the stage. Antehumor.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Abe Lincholn had a son, But he died

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats better than sex? Not dying. Ha

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops