Q: how do you stop a baby's crying keeping you up at night A: pull out it's wind pipe

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Yo mama so fat she has to wear large clothes

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What happened when the zombie walked into the blonde lady convention? He went home hungry.

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Why did the child die? Natural causes.

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im a barbie girl in a barbie world !!!! no your not its not phisicly possible for a plastic doll to have any form of feelings !!!!!

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whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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Have you heard that Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street are gay? If so, than whoever told you may be mentally challenged, Bert & Ernie are both puppets which even though they resemble people with active personalities, they remain puppets and do not have a sexual oreintation.

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

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Hi I am Michael Jackson... you have any young boys? My park is open :), the "nude dark caverns" can be scary, but I accompany them all, so relax. Moral: LEAVE MJ ALONE! ;(

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whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

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Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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Why was the tree sad? Trees cannot think or move, and thus cannot feel emotions.

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what happens when Pinocchio says "My nose is growing"?

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What did Sam say when the basketball hit her face? Ouch.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Q:What did the Hulk say before the bartender refused to serve him further drinks? A: HULK SMASHED! Moral: "THE MORE DRUNK THE HULK GETS! BLURRIER HIS VISION BECOMES! HULK IS THE BLURRIEST THERE IS!"

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A man cheats on his wife and ruins his marriage of 24 years.

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Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

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Person 1: Did you hear the one about the guy who drank vinegar? Person 2: No Person 1: Oh

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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