A middle-class family went away on vacation. While they were gone, a pyromaniac burnt down their house. Their cat was still inside.

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Why are black people so dark? They originated from Africa

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What did the cat say to the human? Nothing

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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Q: why didn't johnny do his homework? A:because johnny is dead

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A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

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A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

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Why do rabbits have such a reputation for rampant reproduction? Sex feels extra good for rabbits.

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why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

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Why did the black man actually receive an education. Because he is entitled to one as a citizen of the US. Frederick Douglass, at the twenty-third anniversary of the Emancipation Proclamation stated that "Education, the sheet anchor to a society where liberty and justice are secure, is a dangerous thing to society in the presence of injustices and oppressions...." Douglass knew that in order for black people in America to survive, they had to be educated because it was the one area that could make the weak person strong and the black person equal. By the time the modern day Civil Rights Movement started, its leaders already knew that education was knowledge, and that knowledge was power. In order for black people to gain their equality, they would have to have a solid foundation to stand on, and that foundation would be education.

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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How many cats get hit by a car per day How ever many cats you can find

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Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

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Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

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Guy 1: Ask me if I have a banana in my ear. Guy 2: Do you have a banana in your ear? Guy 1: Sorry I can't hear you I have a banana in my ear

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Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

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How many amish people does it take to screw in a light blub? None as the amish don't require artificial light

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A man walked into a bar 2 hours later he died from drinking and driving

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Once upon a time, there was a pair of headphones. It loved the sound of music.

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Why did the girl scream at old people? She had turrets. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

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The Blonde Gets 100 % On Her Math Test

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

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Knock knock. Who's there- oh wait, I don't care. Get away from my house or I am going to call the police.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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