Where do cows go when they're bored? Wherever they're standing. Cows cannot use toilets, regardless of their mood.

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what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

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Whats grey and kills people, Terminal cancer,I lied about the grey color

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Why did the boy run a marathon? because one of his good friends had just earlier passed away from pancreatic cancer and he decided to honor his memory by raising money through a 5k run. His family, friends and acquantances were all very proud of him and decided to hold the charity every year.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have cancer."

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

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Suck my bigvagina you faggetass bitchybuns

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Hey, so I know this guy who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy's cousin who's name is Mark.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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What do you call a gay man flying an aeroplane? A pilot.

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Evidently, in order to get any person of an object (most notably a swing) you must hit them with some form of large and/or sharp object.

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How do you confuse a Mexican? several large eggs

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What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

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The Rock: What is your name? Jeff: My name is... The Rock: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!

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Rosie are red velvet blue I made eggs just for you

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your anti-joke

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Thats malarious! When something is so funny that... malaria

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in the designated crosswalk area and there was no oncoming traffic.

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You're a country without the "tree". Did you just call me a cunt?

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What did the girl say to her ex? Fuck you.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Why did the one friend hate the other friend? Because the one friend didnt do a map for social studies he should've done and skipped school for that class and when he came back, the other friend told the social studies teacher he was here and he had to turn in an unfinished poster and now he is a crybaby bitch about it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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