What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

thumb_up thumb_down

If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, chocolate milk.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the Muslim do when he got on the bus? He realized he was in the wrong place and got on a plane and blew it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What happened when the Arabic man went through airport security? He was racially profiled and stopped, delaying not only him but the line of people behind him.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, he found his tractor and went back to work.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: Why was the duck hands down hilarious? A: It wasn't, ducks don't have hands and with human beings able to be equipped with emotions such as to see an object or living organism as funny, do not view these mammals in a humorous manner.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the black guy punch the white guy? They were both professional boxers.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the T-rex say to the velociraptor? Dinosaurs are extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red,I love the walking dead,but if they kill off Darrell ill watch glee instead

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what do you say to a black man with a Porsche? "hey man, i like your car."

thumb_up thumb_down -55

What's worse than an anti-joke about an anti-joke? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? i lost my tractor

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is the meaning of life? Definitions of life on the Web: a characteristic state or mode of living; "social life"; "city life"; "real life" the experience of being alive; the course of human events and activities; "he could no longer cope with the complexities of life" the course of existence of an individual; the actions and events that occur in living; "he hoped for a new life in Australia"; "he wanted to live his own life without interference from others" animation: the condition of living or the state of being alive; "while there's life there's hope"; "life depends on many chemical and physical processes" the period during which something is functional (as between birth and death); "the battery had a short life"; "he lived a long and happy life" the period between birth and the present time; "I have known him all his life" the period from the present until death; "he appointed himself emperor for life" a living person; "his heroism saved a life" liveliness: animation and energy in action or expression; "it was a heavy play and the actors tried in vain to give life to it" living things collectively; "the oceans are teeming with life" the organic phenomenon that distinguishes living organisms from nonliving ones; "there is no life on the moon" biography: an account of the series of events making up a person's life a motive for living; "pottery was his life"

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats black,White and Asian? everything we are all equal

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Orange is orange

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the nerd say to the bully? Nothing. The bully killed him before he could say anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

"...."-Hellen Keller

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good. The food I placed in the refrigerator a few hours ago will now be cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats worse then a hundred dead babies? One trying to eat its way out.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops