Roses are red voilets are blue,you are gay so fuck you,!

What do you call a guitar with only one string? A guitar.

A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

Person 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

Sorry not thinking here, of course I will arrive sooner, give me 20 minutes or so (got to scout the area, you never know) As for coding, there is no hidden meaning so yeah... That is probably some "Neronist" coding format I never knew of I am using so well. Cant drive like this, so I will use a cab and wait for you at the back seat or something, I will let the Taxi cab honk the numbers of code here so you can come out knowing its safe. I sincerely thought you where at the home, according to our coordinates you are... Dont tell me that bastard built some basement over there, wow! I really miss him now, if nothing else because I would have liked a wine cellar made in less than... Sorry, ill be there asap, 20 minutes or less, nah, believe me, "fancy" is the least of things I want, and I wont be changing my mind anytime soon. See ya. I am sincerely surprised you even remember me, then again I look a lot like your crush. Abel (in case you where wondering, this is not my name either, but you get the picture by now)

did you know hellen keller had a dog? niether did she

whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a beanch can support a family

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Dead.

If you die laughting, How are you telling this to me?

THERE'S THE IDENTITY THIEF GET HIM!

What did Batman tell Robin when they got to Gotham City? -Robin, we got to Gotham City.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

How do you make a little girl cry twice? You finish on her teddy bear.

why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

Keanu Reaves

what did the lion say to the zebra? roar!

Your as much use as Anne Frank's drum kit.

what do you get when you mix a shit zoo and a pitbull......"bull shit" oh this joke sucks well my life is over

What do boats and starving children have in common? They both float, except for the starving children.

Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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