whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Type 2 diabetics

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What do you call a man with no home or family? Charles Manson…He currently resides in jail.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

John and Henk are walking down the street. John kills a man, the cops are coming and John runs away. Why didn't Henk ran away? Henk was a rock

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a serious alcohol problem that gave him violent tendencies.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 24

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did the Mexican, the European, and the Canadian all have in common? They weren't used in this joke the last time someone posted it on anti-joke.com.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What is the big difference between chopped pork and pea soup? One of them involves the killing of an intelligent animal and the other involves the harvesting of seeds from a non-sentient plant.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats straight as a fudge packer kyle grund

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why is a building called a building when it's already been built? My pinky is pink and my liver helps me live.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock knock come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Your mother is so fat, when she dives into a pool, the on duty life guard blows his whistle to get her attention. He then proceeds to tell her about the dangers of diving into a pool with the depth of 5ft or less and asks her not to continue her antics. She is not pleased but decides it is best to follow the rules.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's white and looks like paper? Paper.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

how do you break up with your girlfriend? talk about their race.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What is worse than getting hit by a bus? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why is a black man fat? Because he eats a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man goes to the doctor and is told, "you have cancer." He then spends his last days writing a bucket list, but losing his leg in a wood chipper before he could complete a single item on his list

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops