A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? This year I'm going to win the golden brief case!

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there's a irishman, australian and and englishman man on a plane. they are going to france

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What do you call a blond in a library? A girl that likes to read.

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My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

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The awkward moment when these anti jokes are NOT funny. at all.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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Why doesn't the black man have a job? He's working on his masters degree.

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How did the mexican get into the United States of America? Legally.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After ten minutes at 375 degrees, they were pulled out, allowed to cool, and eaten.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it ran away and it's coop was on the other side of the road

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A blonde girl is lying dead on the floor with a potato peeler in her hand, what killed her? Substance abuse and loneliness.

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My aunt said slow and steady wins the race, she died in a fire.

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How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

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Darth Vader: Luke, I am your father! Luke: Nooooo! Darth Vader: Yes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Charcoal is black, So is my neighbor.

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What do babies suck on? juice boxes!

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping out of a plane? A world record sky diving group, and an improbably large aircraft.

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What did the catholic priest say at the AA meeting? Alcohol is ruining my life.

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-What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew -The pizza doesn't experience many years of hardship and social belittlement at the hands of a dictator in need of a scapegoat to support radical ideas.

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what did barrack obama say to the jew osama bin ladins a bitch

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Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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