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Two women are sitting quietly in a corner, minding their own business.

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What starts with ''F" ends in "uck" and usually means excitement? A Firetruck

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Holy guacamole Pineapples

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? People posting the same joke over and over again.

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Why is my penis rainbow colored?

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A muslim checks in at an airport and gets on a plane. He reads a book about knitting, gets off the plane at France and goes back to his job as a librarian.

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What? Huh?

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what did the Alaskan homeless man get for Christmas? Death

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So a magician was droving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

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What did the girl say to the guy who poked her on Facebook? You poked me.

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"Why did the chicken cross the road? ... To get to your house. Knock knock." "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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What do you call a sausage with no sauce? A giraffe.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? El-if-iknow

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What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

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I asked her where you were.

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why did the boring girl get ditched she was boring...

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to get some exercise. They were getting terribly overweight.

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What are the last words of a child dieing of cancer ? Nothing because he is to ill to speak

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What would you call the flinstones if they were black? Ni**gers

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What is dull and has no point? A pencil without its point

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Why did the man start a shooting spree at walmart? Because he is mentally unstable and people at walmart make easy targets.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops