Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken was locked in a cage and the nearest intersection is about a mile away.

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What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

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A gay man walks into a biker bar and orders a drink. The bartender says "Hey, you want ice with that?"

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

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Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

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Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

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Why did the black man go to church? Because his father died.

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Q: What do you call 5,000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A tragedy worse than 9/11.

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So a Moose walks into this store, and walks up to the lady bitch, and he goes "Hey, lady bitch, where the potatoes?" So the lady bitch goes "Heheh, their in aisle 5." So the moose goes down aisle 5, and there aint no potatoes.

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What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

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why did the boy drop his bus because he was hit by an ice cream

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

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Whats the difference between a chicken? One of its legs are both the same.

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Why was the woman sad on her 21st birthday? Because she was born on September 11,1980

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

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Q. How do you make a fruit punch? A. In a punch bowl, mix together fruit punch, pineapple juice and ginger ale. Add scoops of sherbet into the punch. Wait for the sherbet to begin melting, approximately 10 minutes, stir gently, and serve.

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How did the soup lose his job? He got fired.

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Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

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How do you get a clown off a swing set? You throw an axe at his head when he's not looking.

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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what did the horse say to the other horse Neigh

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What did the cat say to the chicken? Nothing. Animals are not capable of speaking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops