What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

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That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

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Why can't the toucann fly anymore? Because they're extinct

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Why did the old man have only one foot? Sadley, the other one was shot off in World War II and life hasnt been the same for him since.

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I dont know, are you a tomato?

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? It's Jeff. Hi there Jeff, come in, the doors open.

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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What is yellow and bright? The sun.

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Guns don't kill people. Dangerous minorities do.

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what did the cab driver say to the black man when he got into his cab? Where to, sir?

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Latvia isn't a joke

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A horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "hey. get out."

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An Atheist and a Christian are walking along a sidewalk going in opposite directions when suddenly the Atheist sneezes. The Christian says "God Bless You!" Even though the Atheist doesn't believe in God he understand that the gesture was a kind one and so he nods and politely says "Thank you!" before going on about his day.

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6 in every 9 people find a dirty reference in every joke. This statistic is in fact false, as 5 in 9 people actually find a dirty reference.

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Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

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Niki Minaj's ass

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I tried frying some fish today, and it started sizzling at me. I took it as a direct threat and started yelling at the stove. Eventually it stopped and dinner was ruined, but I was proud of myself for winning.

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why was the apple on the ground? because it fell

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 6's family

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Cole and his brother josh tag team jaycie until she cries herself to sleep while Sarah watches

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Why did the boy cry? because his tear-ducts were agitated by an emotional reaction due to jokes that were ironically hilarious because of how bland and usual the punchlines were

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What do you call a person mowing a lawn? A Mexican

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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