A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than accidentally flooding your bathroom? A Tsunami

thumb_up thumb_down -10

This one time at Concentration camp.... My friends all died cause they were chosem in the Selection

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

thumb_up thumb_down -1

dfasdf sdf ds fds fds f sdf s fs

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken cross the road? ...because chickens love to confound people.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: Why did Frank have a big horse named Bubba? A: He was allergic to cats

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing, the holocaust was a tragic event in human history.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Naturally I meant to say "Its no fun even when they DO scream in pain" below... What do you think I got? Pleasure? Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: Of course I got pleasure! ;) But I wont share with you!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did Billy say to Timmy? Timmy! I'm so sorry. *Sniffles* I didn't mean to throw the fork that hard. Rest in peace Timmy...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why couldn't Cait walk her dog? She's been paralyzed from the waist down since she was 5 after her and her parents got into a car accident and her parents died.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Which one is hardest?

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the autistic man say to the woman? I have autism

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? It's dependent on many factors, like the size of the babies and the tub. It would be a horrific endeavor, and you should probably stop thinking about such things.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

roses are red violet is blue why rik go to the hospital ? cause he eat glue.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

An orthodox rabbi, a Methodist preacher and a Muslim Cleric walk into a bar and blow that month's tithings on video slots.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two Muffins in an oven One muffin looks at the other muffin and says: "Oohhhh it's hot in here!". Then the other muffin says: "Oohhhh a talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops