How do you get a clown off a swing Hit it with an axe.

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Who looks like a bird and can fly to hogwarts? Dean McKee. his scar is f u c k i n g rotten

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What did the African do when he found out he was constipated? He ate a laxative and went to the toilet

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What did the Muslim say to the Jew? Nothing, as he has been deaf since birth and is incapable of forming coherent speech.

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What did the man say while he was in surgery? Nothing, he was in surgery.

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The mailman saw little Johnny sitting on the side of the street with an old coffee can Mailman: What do you have in that can there? Johnny: dog shit Mailman: what the fuck

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Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

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I'm a poet and I didn't even realize I was one

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If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, chocolate milk.

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What's the difference between an orange? The horse because the vest has no sleeves.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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your mom is so blind she cant read.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Blond answers: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat............?

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Are you black? Kill yourself.

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knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed!" The 14 year old yells back "Excuse me? Do you see a fvcking pickaxe?"

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What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

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What has two wheels, two arms, and a head? A man in a wheelchair. Why was he in a wheelchair? He stepped on a landmine. A man walks, I'm sorry rolled, into a bar.

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her

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What does Patrick say? IM PATRICK!!! IM PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK!!!!! PATRICK!!!!!

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Have you heard any anti-jokes? ... Are you Jewish by chance?

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guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

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What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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