Why was the chimp late for his flight? Because chimps arent allowed through airport security.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I like my woman like I like my coffee. Good.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what do the parents of a starved family do? kill their kids chop them up into little pieces and eat them.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

how many babies does it take o paint a house depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the kettle say to the pot? Nothing, inanimate objects can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Child birth. So easy women can do it.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Wanna hear a joke? A joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what did the doctor say to the wery fat man? you have diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A Girl Who was very close to er grandmother got a text from her mom who was very new to texting, she thought lol meant "Lots Of Love" wel it turns out the Girl's Grandmother Passed away Sunday Morning And the Mom sent the text to the girl saying " Your Grandmother Got hit by a truck and died lol" the Girl Killed Herself that night becasue Of her mom, LESSON LEARNED< LEARN HOW TO TEXT.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It couldnt because a chicken was obscuring its path.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police, mam. We need to speak to you about your son Robert. It's the police, mam. We need to speak to you about your son Robert who? Mam, he was in an accident. Could you open the door please?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are black, violets are black. I'm Hellen Keller.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why do dogs chase squirrels? Beacuse dogs have very low attention spands and also chase cars and cats.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what do black men and vending machines have in common? neithier work and they both steal your money

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did Britney Spears say when she got to Paris? "Oh my God, we're in France!"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what do you get from sleeping with a hooker? An orgasm

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

QUIT PUSHING DAD GUMMIT!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you get when you put Star Wars and Disney together? A Bad Sequel

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What has two wheels, two arms, and a head? A man in a wheelchair. Why was he in a wheelchair? He stepped on a landmine. A man walks, I'm sorry rolled, into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did Grandma give her grandson Billy for Christmas? Scarring memories of sexual abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What do you call a black man that is working on a farm? A farmer.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops