Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

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What's worst than Rick Perry? Two Rick Perrys.

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's actually a bird. You can see its wings flapping.

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What's the difference between a piece of chicken and a black guy? One is delicious and the other isn't good for your health.

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Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Sex! Sex Who? Sex with me. BOOM!

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

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what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

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Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo. The prior sentence is a grammatically correct sentence in American English.

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why did spiderman fall off the roof ? cause it was wet

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so there are two muffins in an oven. one muffin says to the other muffin, "hey is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin says, "holy sh*t your a talking muffin."

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Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

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Why did little jennifer shit herself? Because she fell over.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

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gay marriage.

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A man had come into a bar. No wait, it was a horse. A man had come into a horse.

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whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

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What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

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Why do people read Bibles? To learn about God.

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RUN

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What starts with a P and ends with a O-R-N? Popcorn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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