What did the little boy with cancer ask for from the Make a Wish foundation. A cure and to lose his virginity before he dies.

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What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

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a blond, brunette, and red head all walk out of a hair salon.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get hit by a car

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Your momma's so fat... She's on a diet.

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Thats malarious! When something is so funny that... malaria

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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what did the cow said to the other cow? Moo

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We have reason to believe you are hiding large amounts of narcotics in your residence and have obtained a search warrant for the premises. Open the door or we will be required to use forceful means of entry.

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Why was the little boy speechless? His best friend was just run over by a plow truck.

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A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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why did the baby fall out of the crib? it was dead

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NAACP

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What do you call a red ballon? It depends on its color duh!

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As we had been trying for some months now, I called my wife to ask her the result of her pregnancy test. A stranger answered and promptly told me she was killed in a car crash.

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why cant ben cry, because i gorged his eyes out with a popsickle stick.....

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What's wrong with a muslim flying a plane? Nothing you racist

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What is worse than a papercut? Losing your legs in Vietnam.

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What sucks more than being married? Being shot in both kneecaps

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Why are there so many jokes about people walking into bars? Bars are known as a place most people go to for a social occasion, making them a place that most people can relate with.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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Where were guinea pigs created? Probably in Guinea Land or something.

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A momma tomato and a baby tomato are walking down the street, and the baby tomato starts to fall behind. The mother turns to it and says "hurry up."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops