W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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Why do all black people look the same? They don't, you're either just racist or unobservant.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Throw a brick at him.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Ham sandwich

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What do you call a woman with one leg? I don't know. I am not in the position, currently, of knowing anyone who finds themselves in such an unfortunate condition.

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Why didn't Johnny go to the party? He was aborted as a fetus

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So two cannibals are eating a clown. Cannibal one: Does this taste funny to you? Cannibal two: Considering that this man was a clown he must have been in poverty so he resulted to being an alcoholic and maybe over dosed on over the counter drugs. Cannibal one: Thank you for that reasonable answer.

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Why did the boy eat the worm? Because his parents were starving him, and it was all he had.

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Screw! Screw who? Screw you.

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Q: Why didn't the chicken cross the road. A: because he's a chicken?

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Why did the football coach go to the bank? To make a deposit

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Why don't women bother to have penises? Because they're lazy and they don't care.

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If life hands you lemons you're probably hallucinating

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

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What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

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seek beauty

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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Chuck Norris was a famous actor that starred in Walker, Texas Ranger and Missing in Action. He is a normal person, just like you and me.

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Bob dole

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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