A group of 3 black male friends sit down to have lunch at the basketball court. One black man reaches in his pack and pulls out a watermelon. The second black man reaches in his basket and pulls out some fried chicken and a pan of cornbread. They both look expectantly towards their friend as he opens up his pack. Right as he opens it, however, his cell phone goes off. Upon completing the call, he hangs up and looks at his two friends. "My financial aid got approved, guys!" he exclaims. Both of his friends congratulate him on finally making it to college. They are so proud.

What has a bomb straped to itself and has wheels? Me. I lied about the wheels.

What did the mother say to her baby? These little piggies taste good!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Roses are red Violets are blue and oranges are orange nothing rhymes with orange

WELL YOU ARE ALL A ROOF. So pie, my dearest Adam. Like a butthole.

Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

What did the working mother get her son for Christmas? Empty promises.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!! LOUD NOISES!!!

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a Minute passes.

A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

When I meet the woman of my dreams, she wont know what hit her... Nor will the police.

What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

what do you call a slave with a dream of being free? whatever his name happens to be

What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

Whats worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Noticing the apple is oversized and finding half of a dead baby.

A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

What do you do when you see your wife outside the kitchen? Tell her to enjoy the rest of her day, and you look forward to spending time with her when you both get home from your jobs.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? A Derrick Rose jersey.

A black man is pulled over doing 66 in a 65 zone. He asks the officer what the problem is and the officer says his left tail light is out

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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