I see London, I see France, I am in an airplane on my way to Europe.

Pi = Pie, something everybody likes.

Were you born on a freeway? because thats were all accidents happen.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a cage being carried by a farmer.

How do u get an A in algebra? Train a possum.

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment were left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

* pretend your an orphan Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

OR SOMETHING! VOLUME ONE SPECIAL ALPHA MAN EDITION: What do you do if you are in the jungle, and surrounded by a tiger, and a jaguar and have only one bullet left in the rifle? You shoot the damn jaguar in its tire, and RIDE THE GODDAMN TIGER BACK HOME! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! THE FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD R*PIST!(Yes I also wrote the original kay?)

Whats worse than getting a paper-cut? Getting shot. In the head. Three times.

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

Those days where everything goes wrong, and you think to yourself "I just gotta do whats right here"... ...Sigh... 2. DO YOU KNOW WHY I HATE YOU SO MUCH? BECAUSE I HATE YOU! (Blame is on me, love and hate are not opposites, send me a copy of your book, and ill rip it out for you)

What's little and very sad? A 5-year old locked in a cage.

Your mom is such a slut that she has herpes.

Me: Ask me if i'm a truck. You: Are you a truck? Me: No.

What did the man say to his wife right before they got married? "I do."

What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

square circles have souls but gingers do not CC

Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

you ever put a vibrating phone on your b a l l s ???

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

You know what's annoying When you suddenly die of a heart attack

whats the diffrences between black people and a tire nothin

Caolan and Eamon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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