Friends are like balloons.. If you stab them they die.

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Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

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A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

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Yo mama so fat , when she went to the doctors office and stepped on the scale they said please, your weight, not your phone number .

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Why was the teenage girl crying? She wasn't, she was just experimenting with her emotions.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: To get to your house. A: Knock-knock B: Whose there? A: The chicken!

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How do you make a baby stop screaming? Pour acid down its throat.

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ME NAME IS JEFF

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? I like guys... cause I'm gay.

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What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

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What worse than finding crap on the road? Tripping over and landing on it.

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Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

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Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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What's similar between a boat and a plane? Both can fly except for the boat

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A man walks into a bar.

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What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cats dont talk.

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Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

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How do you get a jewish girls number check her wrist

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Q. What did little John get from reading this. then wait and you will see that the person who you were asking the question will give you a series of awkward faces until they lose interest

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what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

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Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks." The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." They were moose tracks.

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There were two muffins in an oven. They were forgotten about by the baker so they cried, caught fire, burned to death, and formed a medium-sized pile of ashes.

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Roses are red violets are blue I don't know you so get away from me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops