A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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What is the punchline of this joke? There isn't one.

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A man walks into a bar after a hard day of work, and he meets this girl and they really kick it off, so the girl says, "lets go somewhere more, private" and they both go to a more secluded bar that has less decibels of noise.

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What is the biggest fictional book ever made? Either the Bible, or the Dictionary.

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whats worse than someone on the phone during a movie? your mother queefing on your bowl of cheerios

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Q: whats a bunny's favorite music genre A: smooth jazz

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A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

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What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? What's the WNBA?

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Three construction workers are high up on a building when they decide to take their lunch break there. The three open their respective lunches, converse pleasantly, and enjoy the fine weather.

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Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares, it's a chicken.

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Why did Steve Jobs step down as CEO of Apple? Because he died.

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What did the sheep say when he broke a leg? Nothing, sheeps can't talk.

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Why did the child die? Natural causes.

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How many spots does a giraffe have? Depends on the giraffe.

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Why did the 40 year old man quickly close his web page when his wife called his name? Because he had to leave.

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A Muslim blows up a bar

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What happens when you agree to disagree? You extend the duration of the argument.

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My uncle was involved in 9/11... He called me before the plane crashed into the twin towers, his final words were so comforting... "ALLAH AKBAR!!!"

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? If they didn't, their turnout gear would not effectively protect them from flames.

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What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

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What flys? A fly

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knock knock... who's there? your grandmother, now please let me in it's very cold outside. *you now proceed to open the door for your grandmother as she is elderly and you dont want her to freeze

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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