Why does Ron Weasley have friends? He does't. He's a ginger.

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If I have 10 apples and you have 45 oranges how many plates can we fit on the roof? Purple because monkeys don’t fly

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A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

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How many average men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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YO MAMMA SO SKINNY SHE HULA-HOOP THIER A CHEERIO

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What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

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you suck

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why was there a man outside the 56th floor window? he was a window washer and needed the money.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

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hey jimmy! hey bob -.- jimmy, pls pls explain how to do this.. ): see your mom? yea... do it like we did her (OOOHHHH!)

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what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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A guy walks into a bar, and then orders a jack and coke.

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A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

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How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

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A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

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A blonde walked into a bar.

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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Why did rachels computer break ? Because she was using it in the road and got hit by a bus

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Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? As a matter of fact, I do. It goes: "Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? NaBrO."

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Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

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Jews...

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DEATH.

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How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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