What smells worse than a skunk? A dead skunk.

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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Yo momma is so fat when she sat on the i pod she made the i pad!

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women's lacrosse.

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Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

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You know what's lame? A person who can't walk.

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Two hunters are in the woods. One of them clutches his chest, falls to the ground, and loses consciousness. In a panic, the other hunter calls 911 and tells the operator that his friend might be dead of a heart attack. The operator says "Before we send a coroner instead of an ambulance, first make sure he's dead." The hunter says "Alright." There is a pause and then BLAM! "Okay," says the hunter, "now what?" The operator follows standard procedures to keep the hunter on the phone, lucid and calm. 45 minutes later, police reach the scene, arrest the hunter and begin a months-long investigation. Forensics determines that the dead hunter was likely alive prior to being shot in the face at point-blank range. The defendant is charged with first-degree murder and receives a 30-year sentence. On the 9th year of his sentence, he is stabbed in the chest 6 times by an initiate in a rival prison gang and dies the next day. He was 53.

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How many average men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was a recovering alcoholic who recently relapsed and drove his car through his garage. He took his anger out on his wife and kids. His wife kicked him out and filed for divorce. Conveniently, the liquor store is across the street.

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How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

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your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

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Your momma is so stupid your momma forgot that jesus did exist and has been proven by historians to have existed

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69 :)

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How can you tell that a blonde has been using a computer? You can't. There's no common link between computing habits and hair color.

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Today I was reading anti jokes. At first I didn't get it, but then I figured it out and...ah crap, why am I writing this, it's just going to get thumbed down...

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What do you call a dog riding a bicycle? An talented dog.

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What do you call a black man that steal from your shop? A thief

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Once there was a girl named Andrea

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What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

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A man is unemployed, ugly, short, fat, smelly and stupid. That's what she said.

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How many women does it take to arrange my new Ethan Allen furniture? Just one, I was told it was divorce present. She took it with her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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